desert orchidectomy @ali1m Twitter profile

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

2 years

@gasbagheera good posting should always leave the reader feeling like this

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

2 years

poignant

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@ali1m

4 months

starting the year as I mean to go on: by garnering the universal disdain of the group chat

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@ali1m

1 year

edinburgh when it’s bored every july:

Mollie Goodfellow

@hansmollman

1 year

maybe I will just get a fringe

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@ali1m

2 years

@thesolarcoffee @BrandyLJensen I also choose this guy’s hungry wife

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@ali1m

4 years

@poppyexists

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@ali1m

5 years

If any geriatricians want to hire this photo for their next talk on the dangers of giving patients too many tablets, my DMs are open

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@ali1m

4 years

my GP has just phoned and called me “big man” and asked how I’m “surviving this pantomime”

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@ali1m

2 years

“can I have the table anti-Trendelenburg please?” brother I went to Dundee, you can have it head up or head down

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@ali1m

4 years

@DavidBassilyDO you ever accidentally wander on to American medtwitter and see them talking about EKGs but not about kardiologists

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

1 year

you called your account what

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

if I worked in the NHS I would simply ensure I had enough beds and staff to cope with demand

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@ali1m

4 months

@MrDuperouzel @JoeStephenson96 same text but a picture of his girlfriend instead imo

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@ali1m

4 years

@JudeMcilreavy @DaftLimmy the sound of the strummer

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@ali1m

3 years

omg

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@ali1m

6 years

@robmanuel My ex signed up for a flat which was advertised at x pounds per month. They realised after moving in that it was actually x pounds per four weeks and the landlord was getting an extra month's rent off everyone per year.

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@ali1m

3 months

@AndrewDebenham1 @myside_Cricket @weatherallmw lol

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@ali1m

12 days

@PerthshireMags never mind the jizzcocks

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@ali1m

8 years

. @TheSun : me & the helicopter I use to day trip around the county as the fancy takes me #smearthedocs #moetmedics

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@ali1m

4 years

@jimwaterson Beagles About

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@ali1m

3 years

have Imperial asked for a Victoria Cross instead yet

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@ali1m

2 years

@di1cox not a state-sanctioned murder fan but this is class 👏

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@ali1m

4 years

@MedFet_UK @drewseybaby I never thought the heroes we’d need in these straitened times would be from the sex industry, but here we are

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@ali1m

2 years

Brass Eye: Drugs [1997]

John Rain 🥇

@ItsJohnRain

2 years

AMBUSHED WITH CAKE

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@ali1m

9 years

Prince Harry: "I dread to think where I'd be without the Army." Probably living in a palace & playing strip poker with my money, you clown

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@ali1m

1 year

@AliceAvizandum shrinking cities, perhaps the sort you could walk around in 15 minutes

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@ali1m

2 years

got stuck inside too small a scrub top and had to be rescued by a colleague, how’s your Wednesday going

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@ali1m

1 year

when you leave some jam out in the kitchen overnight by mistake

Telegraph Rugby

@TelegraphRugby

1 year

Exclusive: Wasps handed sensational late lifeline

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@ali1m

4 years

🚨 COULD THIS BE SEPSIS??? 🚨

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@ali1m

3 years

@ThatsSoVillage we all chortled when this bloke came on to field in camouflage cargo shorts, but then he took a 4fer including a hat-trick – and would have had 4 in 4 balls if point had held onto a fairly easy chance fair play chief, fair play

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

2 years

it’s like all their Christmases gone at once

BBC Scotland News

@BBCScotlandNews

2 years

A "transformational" therapy has effectively cured people with the bleeding disorder haemophilia B

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

2 years

can anyone work out what’s happened to the pastry we’re using for lunch

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@ali1m

6 years

There’s a very late entry to the “Most amusing ingredient of 2017” competition 🧐

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

5 years

RECEIVING AND MAKING PHONE CALLS AS A DOCTOR: MY SPECIFIC INDIVIDUAL PREFERENCES WHICH EVERYONE ELSE SHOULD OBVIOUSLY ADOPT In this thread I will describe the exact manner in which I think conversations should be conducted because obviously my personality is one to which al 1/34

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@ali1m

6 years

@Oldfirmfacts1 staunch

Flute played during brain surgery

Anna Marie Whitlock Henry played the flute while surgeons operated on her.

www.bbc.co.uk

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

@DrSandman11 @stopthecovfefe @rcantelo for the avoidance of doubt: anaesthetists are vital and lovely, and I know this because I am one, this was a shitpost which has now got wildly out of hand x

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@ali1m

4 years

Animal Crossing finally marketing things the NHS needs

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@ali1m

6 years

Yet more intimate clinical photos of prehospital anaesthesia without getting patient consent 🙃

Nell 🐦

@pakasuchus

6 years

Look at this beautiful boy. Male lions can be tricky to intubate because of their massive roar-producing voiceboxes. He was a good lad though. 😁

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

11 months

pleased with my first day running the Glenfield cardiology twitter account; now, to fire up my laptop and get started on day two by checking our mentions

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@ali1m

2 years

@ScotRail @JoeStephenson96 sorry to hear of your mother-in-law’s accident

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@ali1m

1 year

#TransPeopleMakeGlasgow

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

2 years

the existence of pseudomonas implies the existence of actualmonas

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

@DrSandman11 @stopthecovfefe @rcantelo imagine going to all the effort of getting a medical degree then becoming an anaesthetist

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

1 year

@Popehat evergreen

Andrew Lawrence

@ndrew_lawrence

6 years

@UrbanAchievr Conservative: I have been censored for my conservative views Me: Holy shit! You were censored for wanting lower taxes? Con: LOL no...no not those views Me: So....deregulation? Con: Haha no not those views either Me: Which views, exactly? Con: Oh, you know the ones

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

4 years

@trishgreenhalgh @MartinShovel My top Zoom tip: when the mic is muted, you can use the spacebar as a push-to-talk button. Just hold it down, say your piece, let it go

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

just found two ranitidine tablets on my desk, I'll start the bidding at £100 each

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

@thecatreviewer stopped for questioning by local Safety Panther. Very thorough despite relative youth in the job. 12/10 will drop by his beat again

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

2 years

@dorkusmalorkus_ for the last few months every time I hear someone’s phone make the BBC Breaking News noise I say “Queen’s dead” and at some point it’ll get me in trouble and/or be true

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

@drphiliplee1 Philip as a Glaswegian let me tell you: you can have carbs twice in a day

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

6 years

@thecatreviewer finally met fake George who lives across the road and looks like our cat. 11/10 for fence-top vantage point + 2 for accepting cautious long-armed cheek rubs across the bins. 13/10 will try to encounter again

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@ali1m

3 years

@thecatreviewer absolutely marvellous beast found lounging amidst the plants in Pitlessie on our walk yesterday. V vocal, came over for pats and cheek rubs, gutted when we had to leave. A solid 14/10

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@ali1m

18 days

@hansmollman covered in cold sweat with a little participation medal 🚩

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@ali1m

6 years

Can anyone help me identify what type of deer this is? It has very unusual antlers.

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@ali1m

1 year

motherfucker imagine the morale we could have had in the NHS if retiring colleagues had been allowed a drinks party in the staff room instead of just having to slope off into the dark night

Rt Hon Nadine Dorries

@NadineDorries

1 year

Because the role of a leader during a crisis is to keep morale high amongst those who were working 17hr days 7/7 as morale slumps. No10 was the engine room of the country, it was important to keep people turning up and working and saying goodbye to someone who was leaving was an…

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

6 years

@thecatreviewer this is Will the tripod farm cat. Sought me out for fuss away from the noise of the humans partying in the barn. Delighted to receive pats. 13/10 will visit his smallholding again

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

proper worktops are in and we are *so* close to the finish line

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@ali1m

7 years

@MaxCRoser *swipes right*

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@ali1m

4 years

@JimmyNeesh have you considered playing cricket

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@ali1m

3 years

surely if the train is moving it doesn’t need CPR

Welsh Ambulance

@WelshAmbulance

3 years

Here, crews perform CPR on a moving train – pretend of course! *No mannequins were harmed in the making of this video.

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@ali1m

3 years

@BristOliver @PerthshireMags psyching myself up for 12h of vaccinating on Tuesday, bring me as many pensioners as possible

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@ali1m

7 years

@thecatreviewer Visiting Jelly in Oz. 11/10 for napping in my guest bed; bonus 3/10 for hiding the note saying she might try to escape.

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@ali1m

7 years

Unidentified cat who visits @arrianne_ 's mum for second breakfast. A bit chubby, lovely soft floof, likes a fuss. 9.5/10 @thecatreviewer

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

getting McDonald’s breakfast delivered just in time for Homes Under The Hammer, doing birthdays the right way

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

3 years

I’m personally offended by the use of the term ‘knocking out’. It demeans anaesthesia, and sounds a little assaultey to me. Yet our health secretary happily uses the term. How do others feel?

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@ali1m

4 years

The GMC staring at final-year medical students:

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@ali1m

3 years

@thecatreviewer panther hiding from the rain under a hedge, not massively friendly or desirous of fuss but v keen to investigate me, my car and the parcel I was delivering. 12/10 sleuthing skills🕵️

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

2 years

this is my favourite NHS photo

Andrew Lumsden

@drewseybaby

2 years

this is my favourite NHS photo

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@ali1m

3 years

Level 5 of Ninewells

KWESI

@wifiwrldwinning

3 years

Where is this. Wrong answer only!

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@ali1m

2 years

@nataleebfitness no they aren’t, happy to help

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@ali1m

5 years

. @rhodri it appears @arrianne_ and I are sleeping on an air bed we were told to bring with us a couple of Christmases ago, under a duvet we’ve brought tonight, in the box room of many patterns #DuvetKnowItsChristmas

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@ali1m

4 years

@ted_pen @demarionunn please tell me they'd be seasonal

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@ali1m

1 year

@mikisharon @DemiLardner was the grink there

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@ali1m

3 years

@mcmansionhell @AliceAvizandum I didn’t think you could build a house entirely of Dior belts but I am delighted to be wrong on this occasion

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@ali1m

4 years

@thecatreviewer could not get this awesome fluff to stop for a chat on my way home. 9/10 due to serious aloofness

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@ali1m

3 years

@parkerflash who was it that was trying to cannulate at a periarrest and asked for an orange and got brought a piece of fruit

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@ali1m

2 years

@PerthshireMags I’ve designed an organic alternative made of plant leaves and paper

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@ali1m

3 years

I am once again asking the house officers to be less good at picking up murmurs

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@ali1m

2 years

she’s a 10 but she reads out CHI numbers in 3-3-4 format

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@ali1m

2 years

@punished_cait @SimonXIX another classic of the genre #LykAHelicopter

S🍣SHI

@sushifur

7 years

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@ali1m

3 years

@thecatreviewer beautiful tabby completely undistractably obsessed with chewing on grass, 12/10 for dedication to task

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@ali1m

1 year

if you think it’s expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur

BBC News (UK)

@BBCNews

1 year

Hospitals in England pay £5,200 for one agency doctor's shift

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@ali1m

4 years

ok I’ll bite what’s a “cardiologist”

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@ali1m

4 years

@KarlreMarks probably not a day for a nice hot Ba’ath

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@ali1m

3 years

no one tell him

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@ali1m

8 years

My letter in today's @Telegraph -

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@ali1m

11 months

don’t ask medics this question lads believe me, you’re not prepared for the actual answer

Russell 🏳️‍🌈

@Medic_Russell

11 months

oh let’s not go there

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@ali1m

1 year

when a dress on Sewing Bee is really nicely shaped

IRC

@iggigg

1 year

fucking great darts

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@ali1m

4 years

things I fancy: nice long walk and a cold beer things I am: on call

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@ali1m

10 months

bilateral cellulitis

Journal of Brown Hospital Medicine

@BrownJHM

10 months

A patient was referred to the hospital for possible cellulitis. No fevers or chills. Inflammatory markers are normal. What is the likely diagnosis? (Image: Charlie Goldberg) #MedEd

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@ali1m

3 years

@thecatreviewer spotted again this afternoon and remains keen for pats, 13/10 for consistency

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@ali1m

7 years

@thecatreviewer Country mouser at @Em_Webber & @Leighnotlee 's wedding. Covered in dust & floof. 13/10 nice friends + allowed vigorous pats.

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desert orchidectomy

@ali1m

2 years

finally, a proper clap for the NHS

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@ali1m

3 years

@elinlowri @mevparekh I think she’s misread, the consultant merely said she should learn to Finnish clinic on time

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@ali1m

6 months

in my day we called it sex education

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@ali1m

6 months

Your first intubation attempt failed. You have to bag the patient back up before you go to plan B. This is what your patient should look like... It's far easier to bag when you've double-barreled their nose and placed an OPA. #emergency #emergencymedicine #foam #foamed

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@ali1m

3 years

people who say we shouldn’t care about Erasmus because it was used by 1% of UK students are gonna be raging when they hear how much of the economy fishing represents

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@ali1m

3 years

@thecatreviewer encountered him again last night, remains a solid 12/10 allowing head pats while he snoofs my shoes

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@ali1m

4 years

@MDaware @DGlaucomflecken I go on ECMO every night to clear all the extra CO2 before I return to theatre the next day

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@ali1m

1 year

when is the anaesthetists’ strike ballot result due

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@ali1m

2 years

@thecatreviewer handsome individual found on my evening walk – 10.5/10, half point deducted for not coming close enough for a pat but beautiful plumage all the same

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@ali1m

2 years

@ellenfromnowon George was at the vet yesterday and we left his box out and he went back in for a snooze

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