@_hellochrissy
Lil "a contact was stuck in my eye and I pinched at my eyeball for hours trying to get it out until I accepted that it must have rolled back behind my eye and I needed medical intervention to get it out but they found that it actually wasn't even in there"
@timunken
Text him every day about it. Stuff like "do you need help finding a therapist about this discomfort you have with seeing tires?". "Is a bicycle tire ok?" "Could we cover the tires with a sheet or is it the shape of the tire that bothers you?" "What about smelling tires?"
@haleshannon
I think Americans in particular are uptight about anything to do with a public bathroom because for some bizarre reason the stalls here have these huge gaps where anyone can see in without even trying.
@timunken
Or leave a series of signs leading up to the tires saying "trigger warning: you will see a tire if you walk any further", if he complains about the tires, tell him you tried to warn him
@wendy_resists
Overturned their expectations that a black president would lead the country to ruin. The libertarian-leaning ones who claimed to support meritocracy and stood back smirking waiting for him to fail flew into a rage when he didn't & became outright fascists. Racism underlied it all
@thailandexotic
I have my mom's last name, next born had my dad's last name, next was hyphenated, then my dad's again, and final sibling had my mom's. We all have the same two parents. They just picked the last names at random.
@brokeymcpoverty
@seaofhoney_
Keep an eye on it, the prices will go up regardless of his current intentions. Employees will resign and go work elsewhere if their wages don't go up and prices will have to be raised to cover it.
Since the holidays are over, I lowed the price of Cousin Calls back to normal. I should have done this a couple weeks ago but forgot. I should have put it on my calendar.
What is the oldest book you own. Not written the longest time ago, like if you have a copy of The Iliad printed in 2019 or something – I mean the oldest physical book that was printed the longest time ago.
@davetroy
I directed this movie. There was other stuff pertinent to Qanon that didn't make it in because it didn't seem relevant at the time, for example a guest speaker who thought Penn Jillette (the magician) was involved in the Elizabeth Smart kidnapping.
@KevinSixx13
I'm reading biographies of all the presidents. I didn't get to Reagan yet, but far I'd say it's Andrew Johnson. The south basically did win the civil war, because he made sure there were no consequences for them
@zeykshade
@heidi_seidr
@Wrong_Salem
There was a shooting threat at my kids' school. I looked it up in the news and found a story from that morning. Midway through the article I realized no, this is about a different threat to a school with the same name on the same day in a different city.
@barbaralongley
@thaddeusbooks
Nice comment, but too many vowels. Good writing shouldn't have that many vowels. I fixed it for you:
'H prsn' s frgmnt. Thr's n vrb, s dn't gr tht t's bttr. ls, lmntng th crdntng cnjnctn 'nd' frm th bgnnng f yr qstn mks th cls strngr. "sn't tht bttr?"
A friend of mine has always been unstable, but it's getting worse. She just quit her job and closed out all her retirement accounts to use the funds to start an algae museum. I think it's a hall for kelp.
@tydurden1999
@finn_charlene
@marceelias
Correct. I am afraid of him. He committed serious crimes as president. I'm afraid he'll commit the same crimes again if allowed to. I want him on trial and in jail so he can't. Seems pretty straightforward.
@aintscarylarry
Someone else pointed out that many of the 1930s Nazi-voting Germans didn't know about the holocaust when it was happening and were horrified to learn about it after the war, but the nazis of today are even worse because they see it as a feature, not a bug.
@pinealdecalcify
@FoxNews
To be fair offending conservatives is pretty much the easiest thing in the world. A good deal of the population does it unintentionally just by existing.
I block trump supporters for the same reason I flush the toilet, and it isn't because I am afraid that the excrement's compelling ideas will challenge my worldview.
@KariLakeWarRoom
Keep it up because it's hilarious! You'll be like that Japanese soldier still hiding in the jungle in 1972 because he didn't believe the war was over
Did you ever hear the story about the third-pounder burger that failed because Americans don't understand fractions? I want to test it - so, this is a math test.
What weighs more, a ton of quarter pounders or a ton of third pounders?
@thejackhopkins
Putin may have had such motivations, but you give inmate
#p01135809
too much credit. He likely shared it simply because someone flattered him.
@MacFarlaneNews
@antifaoperative
So they requested a special master when they didn't really need one. In other words, they were just special master bating.
If you write stuff set in the future, do you feel like you need to rush and publish it before the future catches up with you and it becomes historical fiction?
Some people think "eachother" is two words. I guess they spell it like "ea chother" or something. Anyway, it's a controversial topic but I have finally found photographic proof that it is actually one word. This should silence the critics once and for all.
Did you ever read a book that has a duplicate paragraph? I understand how a page could get duplicated in the printing process, but how can they duplicate a paragraph?
Writing tips:
- Make all characters unlikeable
- Start every sentence with the word Suddenly
- Minimum 5 adverbs per sentence
- Devote the last 20% of book to describing each character's physical appearance
- There is NO WAY to tell when to use to, too, or two. Just avoid them
Does anyone else find it strange that people say “sleeping until noon” as if noon is scandalously late? It’s actually a pretty early time to wake up on a weekend
What's something you can say during sex, and also after suddenly waking up to find yourself in the vacuum of space and being chased by half-invisible spectral beings with the bodies of fish and faces of lions, but as soon as you try to run from them you realize you are a toaster?
I got this cool device that can jump start a car. It's like jumper cables attached to a battery, so you don't need another car. But I just read the instructions, and there's a little problem...
@RetroClips80s
His opponents said "he yelled!!!" and for some reason everyone went along with it and acted like it was a thing instead of saying "uh, so what?"
I have confirmation that a random person I followed on twitter bought one of my books. It worked. All that time I have spent reading all of your moronic tweets has finally paid off.