tobias 🌱🍉 @tobiasly Twitter profile

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tobias 🌱🍉

1 year

To my vegan mutuals: I've been a software engineer for almost 25 years, if you ever need help with your website or laptop or some other tech issue feel free to DM or tag me. I love you all & want you to be successful 🧡

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

10 months

recently got promoted at work so they added me to the leadership slack channel & the first thing i did was search for my name to see everything they've said about me the past 4 years

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

11 months

hey everyone, meet Jack. he's a 15 years young gray tabby. his dad couldn't take care of him anymore so now he's my new roommate & i love him :3

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@ChaoticBrandon @christweetsllc

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@ColinSaysThings @mamaztheguru omg I'm DYING 😂😂😭😭 "can I get a W?" Pat: "sorry, no W in sight for you"

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@tamaboochie @x__FuckinnLegit he's been grooming her for her entire life 😞

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 months

This woman discovering the Fleetwood Mac Rumours album in real time is the best thing I've read all week 😁

Dr. Raven the Science Maven

@ravenscimaven

3 months

Wait is this WHOLE album two people in the band breaking up and fighting?!?!

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@g0re0gre @patientfailure @AshleyHammm He really said "no woman who swiped right on me knew where the quote was from" & didn't get the connection

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

@trevorgehman @VicVijayakumar "You can't paint your house that color it'll ruin the character of the neighborhood!" 😭 The character of the neighborhood:

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@Nina_Marie_X @edizzlebror @Return_ofthe_MC "hot girl summer 1970” I'm dead 💀😂😭

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@chocoo122 @MUVAHOOD Ok, that's great for you. But you know nothing of the deceased or their grieving family. Interjecting your unwanted opinion at this time is incredibly crass and selfish.

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@DCheverere @GreatMissileWar

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@jason_maxfield @brianneeex I love how this good doggo is obviously not even comfortable in this position but he's taking good care of his little hooman & keeping him company. We don't deserve them 😭

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

@BDean1234 @rclement411_bc @JoshuaPHilll "the process" is you go to a judge & get a warrant, do you not understand basic civil rights?

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@JizzJohnsonJr seriously though what in the actual fuck?? random people actually coming by & sticking their grubby fingers in there? and putting it on their lips or?? I'm so confused.. even before covid this just nasty af

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

I'm so heartbroken y'all. Aubrey Plaza out here doing ads for the dairy industry trying to make fun of plant milks by shilling "wood milk". The desperation 😭 Aubrey how could you!

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@JohnnyB0401 @PapiKiz Daddy don't wait for no sale he's a man of action

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@natlawyerchic @SydneyBattle his nervous laugh is cracking me up 😂

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@frostedflake @vegetabella111 I'm always relieved when these Facebook posts have the laughing emoji all over them so I know I'm supposed to laugh. Like the laugh track from an 80s sitcom

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

10 months

thanks everyone for the congrats & sorry to report there wasn't anything juicy in there, mostly one of the PMs asking if i could drop everything to work on whatever bug was annoying them that week

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@raye_bierly @juanbuis that is obnoxiously ableist. some people aren't able to pay attention and write at the same time, and forcing them to do so just adds to their anxiety. even if you have studies saying it's beneficial to 80% of students, what about the other 20%?

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@hennessysucks @shaban_l @FrickinDelanie Those are the newer LED ones so yeah probably don't use much power. I think even the older ones used lots of mirrors & special lenses so they didn't use as much as you'd think

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@ItsChichi03 @_nitaaab one of those "life hacks" that's more trouble than just doing the thing you're trying to avoid

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

@_bbytorch @chinchlady701 just because I walk on two legs doesn't mean we can't be besties 🥹

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@lolennui green light = no smork red light = ALAM

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

@Zegh8578 @JoshuaPHilll the way that cop is sticking his chest out like he's gonna stroll through there & do whatever he wants. mad kudos to that principal for taking care of his kids

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@PapaKing73 @raye_bierly @juanbuis that's exactly what I'm saying. you can't force someone into a certain mold just because studies show that "most people" fit that mold.

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@PapaKing73 @raye_bierly @juanbuis so you think that people with learning disabilities or who are otherwise not neurotypical don't have a right to an education?

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@tamaboochie @1Frick2Fracks @x__FuckinnLegit omg I didn't even see that.. that poor child, everyone who should have protected her has failed her at every turn

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

@k_illua @_A_La_Mexicana makes me think of this TikTok

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

9 months

I'd be a lot more excited about this if there were literally anything else I could eat there. Not even the pancakes are vegan

Impossible Foods

@ImpossibleFoods

9 months

Impossible has arrived at @IHOP ®. Available nationwide all day, every day.

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

Vegan for 3.5 years, I guess that makes me the noob 👶

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@heygibbayy @califuneral @NeverSayAngie bigot tries to destroy anti-bigotry sign using his big strong muscles to show how tough he is, then fails and walks away

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@tbender @verge not only that, if you buy 3 checkmarks the 4th is free

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@robinson_ant1 @homoacid with the gurgling sound 🤣🤣

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@swagner1213 @erika_jensen__ they can't arrest a husband & wife for the same crime 😉

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@CuddlePotato @GizmoSupreme @pogchump2 you'll either get arrested, a handjob, or murdered, but you don't find out which until after you've paid

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 months

@Nahakamuzar @FoucaultFanatic @SiliconeLegs @KitesEnjoyer @deb_h17 @meltedpotmama Because it was done in a non creepy, non threatening way. Showing up to the house of someone who paid your company for a service is creepy & threatening. Hope this helps 👍

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@EristocracyTV @TheOmniLiberal You're too polite for hiding his number. I'm sure he wouldn't enjoy receiving texts from random strangers either.

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@sarahmalekzadeh @scruched Bert don't think they're best friends though 👀

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@grocerieswegner @AndieEadvocate @JohnFetterman @DrOz I'm trying to visit your store but every time I Google "Wegners" it just says "did you mean Wegmans?" and returns no results, please get this fixed! 😤

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@SwiftOnSecurity bonus points if one is non-functional with the word BAD written in sharpie

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@vonhonkington @school_ipad not to mention the footer which implies the existence of at least two more folders full of such treasures

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@snarkbat @bbroccolibaby thank u for explaining! it never occurred to me how it could be helpful for the visually impaired but now that I know I'll try to help you raise awareness

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@londonbi @WONDERHOIZ tbh finding this gif at the bottom was worth it

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@bionicbeaut "hey babe" 🙄🙄 how about nah

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@GuessWh64060986 @SussyBaka_420 @LilRichardNixon @olivianerys @notdylm that's crazy! just installed it, it gives a warning about it being for an older OS (the release notes said "Support Android 2.2" lol) but it's completely playable, thanks for the tip!

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

8 months

Just finished my first full marathon in five years! My worst time ever 🙃 But a finish is a finish & I still barely made it in time for #vegan brunch #Indy #MonumentalMarathon

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

6 months

Today is my 4 year #veganniversary ! 🎉

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@eatpussynotpigs It's so deflating to realize how prevalent this still is among celebrities. I thought they knew better than this. She'll wear that monstrosity exactly once but those creatures are gone forever. I couldn't care less about any of them but they're role models for lots of others.

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

9 months

Verdict: it's sooo good! 🥲 And clearly marked as vegan! ty @tacobell ! But it's frustrating that I can't sub for the dairy cheese in regular menu items, I also got the black bean crunch wrap & had to remove the dairy & pay for a side of the vegan cheese

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@Coll3enG real team players sit next to a window and photosynthesize to get all their nutrients

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@kristinascotto wait wait wait now we need more context for the mildew

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@dejajolie @sleeepyzee great camera work!! the zoom was timed perfectly *chef kiss*

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

7 months

for the past several years, every time i see a recipe on instagram that looks good, i save it to my bookmark list called "recipes". I'm currently at 125 bookmarks. not one single time have i actually made any of the recipes from this list.

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@jeffxwilcox @alexsoupertramp the way you busted out the Latin was.. *chef kiss*

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 months

Earlier this week I had to say goodbye to my little buddy Jack. He had 18 good years (I only had him about 8 months) but had completely stopped eating for the past week or so. He enjoyed one last weekend of snuggles & sunshine but on Monday he decided he'd had enough. RIP Jack❤️

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

made my vegan chili for the potluck & everyone loved it 🥰

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

22 days

@chorx @JBehindtheWheel yes but you have to slam your finger in the trunk manually

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

10 months

Kroger finally got it!! I might just chug it straight from the bottle 🥲

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 years

@ktxtfb @Jade_phillips98 @blo0dhoney it's called a convention kait maybe you've heard of it it's called lebowskifest in this thesis I will

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@aaaalissaaaa My journey towards veganism began when I started dating a vegan last year & she helped me realize the hypocrisy of loving animals yet still eating and exploiting them. Even though it didn't work out I'm forever changed. I'm glad she took a chance on a non-vegan!

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

@bucko_fazoo @punishedmother yep, she absolutely set him up to fail her little "test"

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 month

do y'all ever tap on someone's profile then start scrolling their tl & pretty soon you forget you're still on their profile (cuz lots of retweets etc) & you realize you're liking their tweets from a month ago & looking a bit stalkerish

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

10 months

@brenonade @vegan_swiftie it's giving

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@tobiasly

3 years

@KOnyinanya @HouseOfHiliyah how does this pic summarize your situation perfectly 😂

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@tobiasly

1 month

@forevergold3n @Staroxvia I heard a B-25 makes a whooshing sound when it flies over your head

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

I can't tell y'all how much I love camping out in the middle of nowhere by myself & forgetting that the world exists

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@tobiasly

4 days

@DerfandDylan @bantamtools The funniest thing to me is how these fake reviews are still so easy to spot. Who the hell says things like "the checkout process was easy and quick"

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

10 months

in 9th grade i was a nerdy little kid & this girl passed me a note mockingly asking if i'd be her boyfriend. well we just had our 30th high school reunion last week & she's been in my DMs ever since

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@itsmjhatfield @notbryancannoy @vanninthemoon lmao imagine pulling up their business page & your place is the before pic 😂

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@tobiasly

2 years

@kinkbandit @lilowch don't sell yourself short you deserve a whole box

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@tobiasly

2 years

@dog_rates @AskAGrammarian I have never seen a more perfect name for a heckin good doggo

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@tobiasly

2 years

@steeving_around @swagner1213 to sell for favors. that's what he does

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@tobiasly

5 years

@jordie_nassif @CriminelleLaw "It was nice seeing him so washed up" 😂😂😂

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@tobiasly

6 months

@melancholygoal @crydotme & then after he placed it down he looked & admired it like "perfect, she'll love it" 🥹

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@NevilleRay @TMobile @Google Nice backpedaling. You offered RCS on only a very few T-Mobile branded phones and left the rest of us in the dark until Google stepped in and fixed the mess that you & the other carriers created. I love T-Mobile but you dropped the ball on this. Thanks Google!!

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@my_obsexssions @brij1023 @TheBSimone why y'all just making shit up when you could Google it. abstinence can be used for multiple things like alcohol, food etc while celibacy refers specifically to abstaining from sex.

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

7 years

@hels replaced the laces on my running shoes with those elastic quick laces and also got a divorce

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@tobiasly

5 years

@bumblesmybees @annadiamonds @aaronwbu @mysterywoman97 Nykee™

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@tobiasly

10 months

@emilykmay @jayLOVElyyy lmao I love the way little kids latch on to an explanation like that 😊 until he goes to kindergarten & mentions a "hot egg" & the other kids are like what are you talking about 😂

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

2 years

@0xMatt @Dixie3Flatline @Eve6 @hypatiadotca you don't have to join tumblr but you can't stay here

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@BiBetaHavMaMony @cadburytella @alexisscarrasco @lovelylexxxx That's correct, you didn't know, yet you stepped in with your uninformed opinion anyway. The dad made it clear, don't say fuck you to your partner's kids or call them names. Respect goes both ways. If the "elder" is less mature than the daughter, she hasn't earned that respect.

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

8 months

pre-race #vegan fuel at 10th St Diner in #Indy .. chorizo chimichanga, fried brussel sprouts & tofu wings (I didn't order the wings, they were made by mistake but I'll gladly take them to go 😋)

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

@RailroadUnderg1 omg I was not emotionally prepared to see this picture of her smiling, bless her beautiful heart and ty for sharing this story 💛

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@tobiasly

3 months

lfg!!! 😎🫥

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@tobiasly

3 months

@GaymerStream @notcapnamerica like I'm just over her happily eating my burrito tf they talkin bout

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

4 years

@itismethesamboy @se1fcontrol @ginkgocrown It really, really is. I still remember the first time I saw it & thought, Shakespeare would be so damn proud. It was just... so beautiful

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

5 years

@SwiftOnSecurity For some reason this reminded me of this thread:

foone🏳️‍⚧️

@Foone

6 years

You want to know something about how bullshit insane our brains are? OK, so there's a physical problem with our eyes: We move them in short fast bursts called "saccades", right? very quick, synchronized movements. The only problem is: they go all blurry and useless during this

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@tobiasly

2 years

@AndieEadvocate It's so ridiculous 😞 Same with my family, even with stuff that could easily be vegan or they couldn't tell the difference, we have to have "normal" and vegan versions of everything. It gets old real quick 😒

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@tobiasly

5 years

@jmcappiello It makes me sick to my stomach that some waste of oxygen thought it would be amusing to film this poor creature suffering 😡🤬 It makes it very difficult to remain peaceful, knowing I share space on this planet with lowlifes like this.

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@tobiasly

2 years

@SheRatesDogs taking his L like a man

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@tobiasly

3 years

@raye_bierly @juanbuis by "old fashioned" you must mean "catering to the privileged while leaving those who struggle even farther behind."

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

3 months

@EmAndElOrganics @DrMBotha What a horrible thing to do to a child, I'm so sorry. I hope you've been able to find peace

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tobias 🌱🍉

@tobiasly

1 year

@Kyna05 @beigehydrangeas It's so ridiculous, then they talk about planting trees trying to greenwash how horrible dairy is for the planet. It's honestly kinda funny how desperate they are but I just lost so much respect for her 😥

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@tobiasly

2 years

@depthsofwiki @unixterminal