Hmmmm, weird! I do the warm up for this and watch the show every night. I should probably get my ears tested if you’ve heard all those things and I haven’t after seeing it over a dozen times? Or maybe, cloth ears, you’re being deliberately obtuse?
Just left Jonathan Pie’s latest stage show feeling slightly offended after he:
1) called all Tory voters c*nts
2) called all private schoolkids c*nts
3) called King Charles a c*nt in the same week as his cancer diagnosis
Think carefully before paying for his pricey tickets…
Imagine Boris outside Number 10 next Friday morning, looking like a startled pig in a hay bale, saying the words: "I'm about to go to the palace and offer my resignation". Just picture that as you enter the voting booth.
Please watch the full video:
I’m willing to bet ALL the money that if Scotland went for a vote on independence right now it would be 100% yes! You really are a patronising prick Boris
@LisaBetenzos
@nicolelampert
@andrewdoyle_com
Oh hi Lisa, just checking in about what I’m allowed to tweet? I noticed your displeasure with the above repost so don’t want to fall foul of your boundaries and risk you seeing anything that isn’t aligned to your thinking.
WE HAVE LIFT OFF! My first ever full comedy special is OUT NOW on YouTube - please watch, share and tell me if you like it, fuck it! Tell me if you don’t like it - I’m very proud of it GROWING OLD DISGRACEFULLY IS HERE:
We are at breaking point and
@scotgov
@FionaHyslop
and
@CreativeScots
need to make an announcement that monies will be made available to
#savescottishcomedy
“The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.” -Mark Twain - RT
@NeilClark66
They legally put restrictions in place until 17th July - not that anyone seems to be paying any attention to bills being passed without question, interestingly the change in law as to how deaths are now registered ! 😱
🚨❤️NEW
#TEAMGC
ANNOUNCEMENT❤️🚨
We are THRILLED and VERY PROUD to announce the newest member of the
#TEAMGC
family, the FABULOUS
@jojosutherland
! 😍🔥
Welcome to the fam JoJo! We're beyond excited to have you on board 💪❤️
Bookings & Enquiries:
@jannycat
@VoxBoxMusic
@JamesMelville
Ok - would 125000 people still be alive if we didn’t have covid? You know the answer is no - it’s also not that 125000 people have died which seems to be everyone’s benchmark- no one seems to give a shit to the other 600000 people who die every year
@judiadg
@naomirwolf
It’s only a conspiracy theory if you can’t provide evidence ! There’s quite a ridiculous amount of evidence so renders you’re “ conspiracy theory” redundant frankly
@PeakePolly
@naomirwolf
Hence why emergency powers have been extended however the other interesting point is that Pfizer have committed to non profit under emergency rules so they will only keep them in place long enough to vaccinate everyone then clean up with annual boosters
My room key didn’t work for room 512, I told reception, they gave me a new key, I just walked in on 2 people fucking , my room is 312! Easy mistake 😂 oops
So
@LNER
? 10am London - Aberdeen train has no free seats but despite knowing you’d sold all the seats you continued to sell tickets to such an extent that it’s actually hazardous! I’ve gone to 1st class where there are plenty seats and I dare someone to ask me to move!
#livid
Final live stream show from
@StandComedyClub
tonight - It’s been a bright light in a bloody dark tunnel 👏👏👏😘😘😘 massive love to each and every one of you ❤️
@hocwatch
@rorybremner
@ChristinaSNP
I think if you are living in a 3 million pound home it's ludicrous that you pay the same as 100k home dweller - your example reinforces that
Never put your daughter on the stage Mrs Worthington! Against all my advice, all my fears and utter nausea! That little brat
@fynndonaldson12
, that I’m very proud to call mine ,just did something special!
Very nearly got into a fight tonight! Some twat stole a bottle of wine from the restaurant, the bar staff challenged him, he was giving nothing and then I came in all guns, menopausal , Scottish aggression and that’s now earned me free drinks …for eternity - NEVER UNDERESTIMATE
@jojosutherland
is back baby! Storming
#edfringe
with her first solo show in 5 years 'Riches to Rags' about growing up in a castle and steadily worked her way down ever since 🏰✨
‘Will mesmerise and unnerve in equal measure’ ★★★★★
@broadwaybaby
🎟
★ LIVE COMEDY IS BACK ★
After a long 15 months, we're back!
@JaneyGodley
,
@comedyray
,
@jojosutherland
&
@joeheenan
join us for a socially distanced show on 11th & 12th June 🎉
Tickets 👉
It’s been a long road but we can’t wait to see you all again ❤️
"Comedy is a tool to help people through a crisis."
Stand-up comic
@jojosutherland
told
#TheNine
comedy is being left behind as an art form - affecting the mental health and wellbeing of both audiences and performers.
Stand-up Jojo Sutherland has announced that she is giving up her house to head out on a permanent adventure. After staying with friends and visiting some comedy festivals, she will live in a motorhome, touring comedy venues around the UK:
.
@JojoSutherland
was born in a castle and has steadily worked her way down. Catch this top Scottish comic in her hilarious solo show Riches to Rags, March 22nd
@YesbarGlasgow
:
Me and
@jojosutherland
having our nightly interval debrief. It usually goes like this: "Are they cunts, yes or no?"
Apparently Northampton are...not cunts!
@ava_marie_v
@mykola
@CorryLReilly
You are not listening - you hear what you want to hear to make you relevant to your own selfish needs - this is not about you and don’t assume I don’t care about death , I care deeply , I’m just not focussed on covid being the primary culprit
@CaptainWombat78
@SimonKrug2
@eekymom
You can’t blame someone for not knowing but you can absolutely blame someone for not checking! The evidence was overwhelming from the start that we were being lied to and some of us checked and others yelled at us for telling them our findings!
I just played the
@eventimapollo
2 nights in a row, I met a couple of my heroes and my long suffering friends and family were there to witness it so THANK YOU jonathanpienews ❤️ you made me cry tonight I was so…
Ambition unlocked: I have driven the length of the M6,over the last 2 days, without incident! No accidents, no traffic jams and a clear run through roadworks - I am giddy with joy and with an unnerving sense of hope for the future!
Your last chance to see this show live! It got rave 5 star reviews at Edinburgh festival, It’s my story, told from the heart and it’s funny! Come and see for yourselves and please tell other people too as I really want to finish it with a sold out crowd - xxx
@GlasgowComedy
🚨ANOTHER ANNOUNCEMENT🚨 delighted and giddy to share the news that
@BBCRadio4
have commissioned my 2019 solo show “Riches to Rags” 😱 It will be recorded in front of a live audience on 16th Jan
@BarrelComedy
- tickets are free but limited so be quick 🎉
@hocwatch
@rorybremner
@ChristinaSNP
I think we might have different definitions of cash poor and I hear what you're saying but London is not typical of rest of U.K.
A picture from years ago in the club that I call home! Please don’t let live comedy become a distant memory - please go to and sign the open letter
#savelivecomedy