Jack Whitehall @jackwhitehall Twitter profile

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 months

My brand new stand up Special, Settle Down, drops on @NetflixUK on this coming Tuesday (30th). 🙌 #SettleDown #Netflix

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Last Seen Profiles

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

1 year

Should probably finally learn to drive now. #Adulting #DadLevel

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

New show. Me @lizzo and @Harry_Styles travelling round the world in a camper van.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

8 months

WARNING: This account is now going to feature exclusively dad jokes.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

Can’t believe it’s been 10 years. So many happy memories, people always ask me if we’ll get back together - never say never. I’m waiting by the phone @NiallOfficial #10YearsOfOneDirection

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

2 years

Always thought there was a time and a place for bagpipes. But by god that was the time and the place. Incredible.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

7 years

Just heard some kids arguing on the street. So pleased to hear the insult 'suck your mum' is very much still in circulation.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

The downside of working out with Glutenus Maximus @TheRock is that he has all the machines set on beast mode. A lot of this was going on.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

Dominic Cummings is late for his statement because there’s traffic on the A1.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

It would have been more entertaining if he’d just blamed it all on Carol Baskin.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

She can also use this celebration if they beat Holland in the final.

OneFootball HQ

@OneFootballHQ

5 years

Sipping into the final! ☕️🇺🇸

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

2 years

Haaland is like a real life PES6 Adriano.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

You’d only need two things to make Dancing on Ice more entertaining. 1) Fatter Celebrities 2) Thinner Ice

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

Utterly devastating about Caroline Flack. She was a fun, kind beautiful person, always loved seeing her. So unfair that this has happened. Let’s pray we learn from this and remember to be a little bit more compassionate to people when they are down.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

This tweet didn’t age well.

Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

What!? No! Not Eurovision. What will get cancelled next? Christmas? Happiness?

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

I loved the new Lion King. Watched it in a cinema packed full of family’s and children. I must apologies for audibly telling Scar to ‘f**k off’ at one point. I think I was a little pumped up.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

I cried. Slightly lost my shit. Then nearly passed out with a head rush. This is only the round of 16. God help us.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

1. When is the stag do? 2. Can I come?

The Prince and Princess of Wales

@KensingtonRoyal

6 years

Prince Harry and Ms Markle became engaged in London earlier this month.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Such a weird feeling. I’m bitterly disappointed. But don’t feel robbed, angry or particularly depressed. The team over achieved, played some really decent football and totally reset the nations attitude to international football. What a great summer they gave us. #ENG #WorldCuo

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Spice Girls Reunion. Yes please. Apparently they are looking for a replacement ‘Posh’? You know where to find me.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

8 months

This reminds me of the time Redknapp tried to tell me he only did those Skechers adverts because he fell in love with the Directors creative vision.

Match of the Day

@BBCMOTD

8 months

Jordan Henderson says he did not join Al-Ettifaq for the money 💰❌ #BBCFootball

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

OH MY GOD. I have just been informed that during the recording of my christmas show with my father at The London Palladium a couple were kicked out of the theatre for having sex during the show. 😂😂😲😲 Who gets horny watching my dad tell anecdotes about Elaine Stritch!?

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

Don’t think I can be arsed so if someone wants to use my ‘1 exercise a day’ it’s all yours.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Been on delayed plane for over an hour and just had this announcement: ‘this is your pilot checking in with an update. There is no update. I still don’t know anything. Thank you.’ 😂 Thanks hun.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

I think our Colonial past should be on the curriculum, that’s why History is so valuable. We can use it to inform ourselves and take lessons for the future. Let’s not put our national story through a nice Instagram filter. Discuss, debate and learn from it.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

STOP THE COUNT. Give him the glitter ball. Love this.

BBC Strictly ✨

@bbcstrictly

3 years

A Rapper's Delight from start to finish 🙌 Bill Bailey and Oti's epic routine is one for the #Strictly history books already. @BillBailey @OtiMabuse

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

So sad about Sean Lock. He was such a special comedian. One of the quickest, most naturally witty people I’ve ever worked with. Worlds a less funny place without him. RIP.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Ronaldo swerved that like he swerved the tax man.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

Woke up a bag of nerves this morning. Got the whole day to wait. Which way is it going to go in the Love Island recoupling?

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

I think it’s now time to start seriously considering the possibility that I might not have been invited to the Royal Wedding.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

If you then don’t you dont love me deserve me at my at my

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

This is so sad. Surely we just keep the costume and put Ozil in it?

SPORF

@Sporf

4 years

🦖 @Arsenal have let go of Gunnersaurus, who has been a loyal servant of the club for 27 years as part of cost cutting measures. 💔 Not the start to deadline day @Arsenal fans wanted.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

After 2 weeks of multiple health screens and asking everyone to quarantine I surprised my closest inner circle with a trip to a private island where we could pretend things were normal just for a brief moment in time.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

I think my worst nightmare would be someone filming me having sex, then Roy Keane watching it back and appraising my performance.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

In a depressing turn of events my mother has started using the word ‘banter’ in the family WhatsApp group.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Fully expected to get butchered for that. Thank you so much for all your lovely tweets. What a show. I love Stormzy.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

Favourite Brits ever. Rod and Harry fighting over my mum, Queen Lizzo, Scottish Beyonce being a legend, Dave! Some of the best performances I’ve ever seen. Massive team of people make that show happen, well done to all of them! #BritAwards2020

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

7 years

depsressing when your phone tells you your most frequently used emojis are the pint and the strong arm. little reminder that I'm a bellend.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

My taxi driver just got into a road rage incident and called the other driver a ‘salad’ what a great insult.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

1 year

That ticked every box of England misery bingo. Joke of a ref, missed pen, winning goal from a player that was a donkey in the prem. #NotComingHome

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

10 years

I'm playing for @NiallOfficial team at this charity football match, you can get your tickets here http://t.co/IflpoIbE6x

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Really sad about the passing of Barry Chuckle, as you may know i was obsessed with the Chuckle Brothers as a kid. Legends. Rest in peace.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

You know your hungover when Face ID doesn’t recognise your face.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

I see Danny Dyer’s daughter is in Love Island - any would be suitors been warned. #ThePipe #LoveIsland

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Landed in Tokyo, what a place. I am a big fan of sushi and a jet of warm water up my asshole, so I think I’m going to have a great time here.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

The only way he comes back from this, is if there’s a longer version of the video where he pulls off a mask to reveal we’ve actually sold them Mustafi. #arsenal #Koscielny #Mustafi #muppets

FC Girondins de Bordeaux

@girondins

5 years

Nouveau joueur, nouveau maillot, retrouvez-le dès maintenant ici ➡

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

1 year

Cocaine Bear origin story…

DiscussingFilm

@DiscussingFilm

1 year

‘PADDINGTON IN PERU’ begins filming on July 24. (Source: Deadline)

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Travels With My Father Season 3 will be on Netflix September 6th!

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

Love to see it. If Kronke came onto the pitch someone would have to tell him which team Arsenal where.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Does lime in a Corona count as 1 of your 5 a day?

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

That was amazing! #NHS so brilliantly British. I think tomorrow at 8pm we should all go to our windows and do a collective eye roll and tut for every dumb tit ignoring government advice.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Devastating. But an England team that can come home with pride. Well done. #ENG #WorldCup

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

US Customs Official: What is the purpose of your stay? Me: Disney press tour. Official: Who is your primary contact? (Long pause) Me: Mickey Mouse? *tumbleweed*

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

One day I will learn as an Englishmen to never let myself think that it might be coming home.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Just walked past a Quicksilver shop and had a horrendous flashback to being thirteen and having a Quicksilver hoodie and a necklace with a shark tooth on it. Oh and Adidas glasses. Plllayaaa.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

There’s a lot of very depressing stuff on Twitter today. So let’s unite in this, I used to look like an absoloute knob. 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈

🦋

@scurchxr

4 years

watching an old episode of would I lie to you, @jackwhitehall can you explain this

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

Arsenal are going to be out of the Super League even quicker than they tend to be out of the Champions League.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

Line of Duty is so brilliant. Made in a pandemic, without a Hollywood budget, brilliant performances everywhere. Proper event television. No other show do I get calls from all of my family afterwards to talk about the twists and quote Tedisms in a terrible Northern Irish accent.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

New Lion King trailer is amazing. I’m billing @Disney for the therapy I’m going to need. As if watching a cartoon Musfasa dying wasn’t traumatic enough, now I can see the light drain from his eyes in IMAX 3D. #TheLionKing

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

If Southgate wins us the World Cup I think @GaryLineker should do Match of The Day in just a waistcoat. #ENG #WorldCup

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

10 years

Ha my father just tried to put some music on that wasn't Buble. I just shut his ass the f**k down. We're on 48hour Buble lock down.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Hands up whose already failed Dry January? 🙋‍♂️

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

World Cup withdrawal symptoms quite bad today. My cleaner found me locked in a cupboard rocking back and forth mumbling ‘it’s coming home’.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Guys how did you find my Elizabeathen Tindr profile??

National Trust

@nationaltrust

6 years

Caption this...

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

2 years

I’d honestly rather have that rotting lettuce in number 10 than Boris again.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

I would pay so much to see these to settle this dispute like men. Shirts off in the Sky Sports car park.

Soccer AM

@SoccerAM

3 years

Things got very heated between Jamie Redknapp and Roy Keane 👀🍿

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

If the Corona Virus entered an act they’d get more points than the UK. #Eurovision

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Happy birthday @Harry_Styles off to get your face tattooed on my cheek (butt) to celebrate your existence.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Remember in this weather to wrap up warm.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

Christmas is cancelled. This couldn’t get any worse. Arsenal: hold my beer.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Someone went as @fatherwhitehall Winston and I To Halloween 😂😂😂

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

1 year

This makes me all the more upset I wasn’t asked to voice the audio book.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

What an innings Alastair Cook, the only way it could be more fairytale is if with the final delivery he clobbers a six and the ball lands on @piersmorgan

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

No one puts Theresa in the corner.

Reuters

@Reuters

6 years

UK PM Theresa May shows off her dance moves at a school in South Africa. Via @ReutersTV

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

No more Daily Briefing. Going to miss it. Maybe they should do a compilation show, or get Rylan to count us down the best bits.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

We’re gonna win the World Cup.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

I just had to explain to an American the importance of East 17 Stay Another Day. How was that song not a global hit. Should be our national anthem!

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

*Goes and buys girlfriend some goalie gloves.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

The GOAT is retiring. Congrats on an amazing career @petercrouch

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Ok ‘pissed’ is not a word your allowed to say on breakfast television. Who knew?

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

After eating this (his first McDonalds in 15 years) I heard @fatherwhitehall tell my mum that he’d just had ‘something called a Chicken McFlurry’ also notice the smuggled in Pinot and makeshift ice bucket.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

1 year

It’s not even 10:30am and Tom Skinner has already had Pie and Chips with Wayne Lineker, sold 500 mattresses and appeared on national television to defend the concept of ‘banter’. What a time to be alive.

Good Morning Britain

@GMB

1 year

'Landlords should be on the ball.' @iamtomskinner says pubs shouldn't have to employ more staff to be 'banter' police, landlords should take more responsibility for the behaviour in their pubs.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

I never thought it would happen and I can’t believe I’m saying this. But I genuinely think Tottenham might be in with a chance of winning a trophy here. #worldcup

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

I’d never repeat a joke. Would I @Harry_Styles ? #Brits2020

Jack Whitehall Fans

@whitehall_fan

4 years

#Brits2020 please can @jackwhitehall dress as @Harry_Styles again. Please make this happen @BRITs 🙏

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

2 years

Is the UK actually going to do the political equivalent of booty calling it’s toxic ex? Peak banter era UK.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Mother before, during and after her first rollercoaster in nearly a decade. 😂

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

Papastathopoulos, Mkhitaryan, Aubameyang - Arsenal are becoming a really hard team to support for a dyslexic

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

3 years

Big up Leicester City. Really hope they qualify for the Champions League. Especially if it’s at the expense of one of the Super League cabal. They are such a well run club. Chat shit behind everyone’s back to line your own pockets - get banged.

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

4 years

Me at 20. Oh dear oh dear

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

8 years

Happy Halloween. Anyone need any inspiration for a costume?

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

6 years

My fathers face when my mother told him the christmas crackers where from Poundland. 🤯

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Over heard an american in the hotel who had just seen @fatherwhitehall in the lobby and was trying to explain Travels With my Father to his friend: “it’s about an esteemed English actor from the 1950s who goes on vacation with his doofus son.” 😂

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Jack Whitehall

@jackwhitehall

5 years

Be mine. 😙