Steven Bonaventure x @absolutegazelle Twitter profile

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 years

Me when my mum used to drag me to Clark’s during the school holidays as a kid in search of some new school shoes:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

A look back on the weird year that 2023 has been from start to finish: (a thread)

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

This is the only week you can retweet this

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

God creating December:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 months

“We’ll have four tickets for the immersive Willy Wonka experience please”

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

A look back on the weird year that 2022’s been from start to finish: (a thread)

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

The British public voting for Matt Hancock to do every Bushtucker Trial x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 months

My photo on teams Me on a teams call

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

6 months

I will never forget Matthew Perry’s face when Miriam Margolyes told the story about meeting Laurence Olivier. A truly priceless reaction. R.I.P Matthew

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

I’m obsessed with this Eastenders episode where Pat Butcher dramatically orders an orange juice at the Vic and it then cuts to the credits 😭 x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

“Your parcel is with Evri”

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

When you find out Evri are the courier responsible for the delivery of your parcel x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 months

Camila spotted looking for Kate Middleton

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 years

No one: McFly, 2004:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 years

A lady who was brave enough to address child abuse within organised religion.. yet everyone chose to disbelieve & condemn her, jeopardising her career. 9 yrs on, the pope acknowledges the church’s child abuse. If you ask me, Sinead O’Connor is still, to this day, owed an apology.

Michael Rees

@MichaelRees84

5 years

Today in 1992 Sinead O’Connor ripped up a photograph of Pope John Paul II, on the US TV show 'Saturday Night Live', as a protest over sexual abuse in the Roman Catholic Church

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Boris Johnson returning to No 10 x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 years

Just sampled Greggs’s new vegan sausage roll... Am I a vegan? No. Did I purchase one because of Piers Morgan’s breakdown over the idea? Yes.. and I suggest you all do the same

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

4 years

Denise Welch as confectionary: a thread x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Why does it sound like she’s about to burst into song at the start of this news bulletin?! 😭 x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

4 months

KFC running out of chicken in 2018. National crisis x

Scott Bryan

@scottygb

4 months

What scandal do you think a TV drama needs to depict next?

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

POV: You’re on a Jet2 flight and Jess Glynne - Hold My Hand starts playing x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Don’t forget that tonight is the night the clocks go back at 2am. You know what that means x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Wendy Williams laughing manically at an audience member lives in my head rent free. The Wendy Williams Show will be greatly missed x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 years

Me at the start of 2019: This is obvs going to be my year. Bring it on Me now with only two months left of the year:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 years

Them: Is British cuisine even a real thing? Me:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

Jennifer Coolidge answering “dolphin” when she was asked her dream role

Pop Crave

@PopCrave

5 months

What was your favorite pop culture moment of 2023?

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 months

‘And as the first photo of Kate Middleton in months surfaced online, I couldn’t help but wonder… why was William not in the photo too? Where was her wedding ring?’

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

The O2 roof 🤝 Natalie Imbruglia You’re a little late, I’m already torn

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

When the cashier presses "clearly over 25" a little too quickly for my liking x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

Shadrach Dingle and The Cowardly Lion

Seola Quintanilla Pérez

@meItingbytwice

3 years

do y’all have “forbidden” pairs you think look alike but also know NO one else is gonna agree?

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

Ariana DeBose’s opening rap at the BAFTA Awards. An incredible moment.

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

6 months

I knew this day would come 🥰

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

Lily Allen rhyming Tesco with alfresco x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Megan Thee Stallion pushing Gail Platt down the stairs x

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@absolutegazelle

2 years

Me in school when the teacher carried on talking but it was break time x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

"Free for a quick call? Might be easier to explain on the phone."

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

8 months

I can hardly believe it’s been 5 years to the day since Roxanne Pallett officially ended her own career. Emma Willis was having none of it in this interview.

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

You had to be there x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

The Barbenheimer takeover. I don’t think I’ve ever seen such collective excitement around going to the cinema to watch two films in one day.

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

4 months

Receiving socks Receiving socks as a child as an adult

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Liz Truss trying to ‘flatten the curve’ x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

“Sorry I can’t make it, I’ve got plans” Also me:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

Hugh Grant delivering the most ‘I don’t give a shit’ red carpet interview of all time at The Oscars

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Rose Tyler in The Age of Steel (2006) episode, trying to walk with no emotion amongst the queue of cybermen x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

Remember when that group of millionaires took a submarine down to the Titanic and it imploded? 2023 truly was wild…

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

4 years

Piers Morgan: Meghan Markle should go back to America. She’s ruining the royal family. Meghan : Alright then, I’m taking my son and husband with me Also Piers Morgan:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

4 years

Dan Wootton, guilty of most of The Sun's negative press about Caroline Flack, is now shifting blame & paying respects. A vile human being. He, Piers Morgan & Katie Hopkins need to finally take responsibility for the relentless abuse they throw at celebs. Words have consequences.

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 years

I’m sexually attracted to: ⚪️ Men ⚪️ Women ⚪️ Both ☑️ Sarah Harding’s flat as a witch’s tit note on GMTV back in 2008 x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

6 months

We must never forget Cilla Black’s rendition of “All Night Long” which she performed to a house full of sedated children rotating around a table. Incredible stuff

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

4 years

Them: Who was your favourite Tweenie growing up? Me:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

Me joining a teams meeting and then remembering that my camera’s on:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

I have never been able to unsee the cowardly lion in Wizard of Oz as Emmerdale’s Shadrach Dingle 😭

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

This iconic episode of Wife Swap where the boy runs away because his "swap mom" threw away his bacon

Pop Crave

@PopCrave

1 year

What's a significant moment in pop culture that you still quote regularly?

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 years

Excuse me, why is #StanSusanna trending? She sits next to Piers Morgan every morning smiling away while he spouts bigotry & ignorance. She’s utterly complicit. People who don’t challenge morally unjust views in a public forum with a wide audience should be held accountable too.

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

He’s a ten but he drove me and the kids into the local canal x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Michelle McManus spent more weeks on the UK Singles Chart than Kwasi Kwarteng spent serving as chancellor x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

D 🫀 N I E L

@GayAndEvil

1 year

I AM SICK TO BASTARD DEATH OF THAT LITTLE GREEN CUNT

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

8 year old me whenever I spotted someone smoking a cigarette x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 months

໊

@buffys

2 months

WITHOUT GOOGLING name a famous historic battle.

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

The bizarre skiing trial with Gwyneth Paltrow -

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@absolutegazelle

5 months

Finding out about Prince Harry treating his frostbitten penis with Diana’s lip cream…

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

P!nk being handed a wheel of Brie at her London show… just days after having someone’s mother’s ashes thrown at her

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Me when an email finds me well x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

4 years

If you voted Tory, I hope you remember that, when you get sick and have to wait 6 hours to be seen by a doctor or when your house is broken into and the police can’t do anything, the tories never have and never will care about the man on the street. #ElectionResults2019 #exitpoll

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

Jess Glynne is threatening to release new music in 2023…

Jess Glynne

@jessglynne

1 year

See you next year 🖤

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 months

“Sorry, I’ve got plans this weekend” Plans:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

This lady having an outburst on a plane. What in the Final Destination was going on here?!

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@absolutegazelle

5 months

Colleen Ballinger responding to serious allegations made about her with a 10 minute ukulele song. The arrogance was astounding x

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@absolutegazelle

4 years

No one: Me on day four of dry January:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Meghan Markle looking at Piers Morgan’s camera roll and internet searches x

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@absolutegazelle

1 year

I think I’ll take all the tickets, what a good deal x

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@absolutegazelle

5 months

Me watching The Doctor and Donna in 2008 vs me watching them now in 2023 #DoctorWho

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@absolutegazelle

2 years

The Rt Hon Kim Woodburn MP has been appointed Secretary of State for Tackling Adultery and Ganghandedness. #reshuffle

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@absolutegazelle

5 years

No one: Me returning home after another failed date:

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@absolutegazelle

1 year

Can’t stop thinking about Anne Widdecombe almost breaking her neck on Sooty & Friends while riding on a ghost train.

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@absolutegazelle

2 years

Dry marker pens when used on a school whiteboard:

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@absolutegazelle

5 months

Though technically still 2022, it wouldn’t be right to act as though the masturbating walrus never happened and never ruined the people of Scarborough’s new year firework plans x

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Before Will Smith vs Chris Rock, we had… x

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@absolutegazelle

1 month

If you’re wondering why Lorraine Kelly’s getting a BAFTA, it’s for this scene where Gail Platt shot her in the leg with a bow and arrow

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Happy 6th anniversary to my favourite headline of all time x

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@absolutegazelle

5 years

Me during every work break I’ve ever had: #GBBO

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@absolutegazelle

5 months

We lost some of the most iconic stars this year 😢

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

rhinoplasty, lip filler, cheek implants, chin implant, jaw shave, brow bone reduction, buccal fat removal, botox and eye lift

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

Maryam Moshiri opening the BBC News bulletin with a middle finger x

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@absolutegazelle

1 month

Me after listening to Kylie Minogue’s third single from X:

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@absolutegazelle

1 year

It’s just dawned on me that Denise Welch is the British Jamie Lee Curtis

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@absolutegazelle

5 months

The entire country counting down to the emergency alert test as if it was New Year’s Eve or something but then only half the nation received it 😭

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@absolutegazelle

1 year

Kim Kardashian with dead celebrities’ belongings x

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@absolutegazelle

2 years

Rishi Sunak leaving Westminster this afternoon:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

2 years

Me waiting for this thunderstorm that they’ve been promising and some cool rain x

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@absolutegazelle

1 year

BREAKING: Phillip Schofield’s replacement on This Morning revealed

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 month

Me checking every aisle in Tesco for heavily discounted Easter eggs

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@absolutegazelle

3 months

BBC News (UK)

@BBCNews

3 months

Horse that led Queen's funeral procession to Windsor Castle dies

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

1 year

Me to 2023:

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Steven Bonaventure x

@absolutegazelle

5 months

The end of Twitter and the way that half its users flocked to Threads… for about a week before returning to El*n’s rebrand

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@absolutegazelle

2 years

Lily Allen didn’t rhyme Tesco with Alfresco just for you people to refer to her as “David Harbour’s wife”. It’s blasphemy x

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@absolutegazelle

2 years

Center Parcs workers on Monday morning:

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@absolutegazelle

1 year

Sometimes Tots TV just descended into absolute chaos x

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@absolutegazelle

1 year

Martin Hall

@martinhall18

1 year

Show me a more British scene , I’ll wait 🇬🇧

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@absolutegazelle

5 months

The UK may have gone from being second place last year to second-to-last this year at Eurovision but Catherine Tate was nothing short of iconic, dishing out the scores

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