Ewgi @Ssaasquatch Twitter profile

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Ewgi

1 month

The music is going to stop someday. You either play it until it stops or sit on the sidelines. I know what I’d rather do

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Last Seen Profiles

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@mob_neco

Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Nigerians are looking at this road and wondering what’s wrong with it

No Context Brits

@NoContextBrits

3 years

Only in Britain would a road look like this.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

So you mean N10m has fed almost the entire Lagos in 3 days but these people budget N1trillion to feed school children with subpar meals every year?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

We have a mathematics problem in this country.

Peng Man ⚡️

@pengmanofficial

4 years

Half-Igbo, Half-British, Half-Lagosian 😌

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

Forte Oil Age: 20 years+, Acq value: $269m Paystack 5 years, Acq value: $200m Clearly we can see where the future is shifting to.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Just finished paying my brother’s UK masters school fees. Abeg if you see me outside, hug me and fold small change inside my hand.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Time to hit the streets and put bread on the table 🤝

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Boys are actually the worst at overstaying their welcome. You’ll be playing PS5 and drinking whisky next thing omolomo don hang shirt for your wardrobe.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Left home with a Benz today and will go back home with a scratched Benz & a Keke Marwa. Grateful to God for the small wins

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

This is the funniest thing I have seen in a while 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Every now and then I remember concluding NYSC and immediately applying to become the Commercial director for Shell. I think the Igbo I was smoking in Ejigbo that year gave me extreme confidence

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

Asake indexed his pricing to the USD without considering the fact that we are simply too poor in Nigeria. Imagine paying $100 for a regular ticket. Wish him all the best but I am out

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

11 months

I think Onana’s performance tonight has given me more clarity why ball-playing GKs are a thing. This is a master at work

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

This Dubai chef started cooking for Celebs right before our very eyes. This app sometimes >>>

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

11 months

Under no circumstance should you repeat underwear

LOVE HATE RELATIONSHIP

@ufomidas

11 months

in regards to hygiene, what are some of y’all’s golden rules?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

The replies to this tweet. Kinda weird. When I tweeted how my chairman offered to take up my rent for life cos of how good I am at my job, nobody suggested I was sleeping with him.

'Sayo B.

@Olvwasayo

4 years

The CEO gifted me this for being so good at my job. I'm crying.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

11 months

I think she just wanted to go to prison

Andrew Bagala

@andrewbagala

11 months

According to @AirportGenCus , a Kenyan woman had been arrested by Indian customs authorities at the airport while trafficking 2.5kgs of cocaine concealed in whiskey bottles into India. Photo by @AirportGenCus .

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Think it was the time someone broke bottle on the head of a random passerby to stab who he was fighting with

ÀGBÀ

@Oli_Ekun

3 years

What's the wildest thing your eyes have seen in Lagos?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Go and tell the guy hawking pure water under the sun for a N100/day profit that poverty is nothing but a mindset

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Mentally unprepared for tomorrow man. Hoping LASTMA arrests me on my way to work or something

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

I was the first person to resume at the gym today for the fist time in my life because ifitness decided to debit me N96k for gym subscription I unsubscribed for. Make we find out who craze pass for this Lagos

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

Mattrass tbh. Had to explain to the seller that I was just trying to sleep.

Cowrywise

@cowrywise

4 years

What’s that one adult life item you found surprisingly expensive?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

GTB told me it’ll take 3 weeks to refund my funds they debited me for no reason whatsoever. Immediately appeared in their branch and it took a day. Brethren there’s no form of protocol that in-person blasting doesn’t break. Try it today

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

You’ll enter pub with London boys and they’ll make sure that bill is split to the last penny. Haven’t seen stingy people like this my entire life

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Weirdest shit just happened to me on Ajose. Was jamming Buju’s album in my car and some chap in a Black Benz appeared from nowhere and tried to overtake me. Turned out to be Buju 😂

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 months

I remember when Wolf of Wall Street was newly released and every HR in Nigeria was telling us to sell Pen to them. We’ve suffered in this country.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

7 years

Presently #IStandWithNigeria I love this guy TBH

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

So the next set of Presidential aspirants will put unbanning of Twitter in their manifesto to sway us? Kai Nigeria my country

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

Most of the submissions for Naira redesign challenge i have seen so far has made me appreciate the designers at CBN a lot more

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Discovered today that my house help is apparently a very wealthy man on Snapchat. Bobo lives a proper fake life for the gram with my car and apartment.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

6 months

Seun Kuti said if Elon Musk wakes up to Dangote’s wealth, he’ll commit suicide 😂

Businessman

@utomisphere

6 months

No matter how much money you think you have, to someone out there you are the struggling guy

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

This is exactly what I like to see when I watch a movie cos I believe a movie is supposed to take me to an alternate reality. Never change Bollywood

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

Love how Arab nations are supporting each other this World Cup. Can never be me sha because I pray everyday for Ghana’s downfall

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

People are really buying land for residential purpose near Dangote refinery and I can’t help but laugh. It’s almost as if these people don’t know what a refinery is.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

People with absolute zero chance of winning are picking up this APC presidential nomination form. Something is definitely going on. These men aren’t fools

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

10 months

Richest black billionaire my foot. What has he done to improve my life. Go to YouTube to watch all his interviews. Nothing there to learn from this guy

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

I didn’t die o my sister.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

Man will spend serious bar on him babe birthday then for him own birthday, babe go come online dey ask ‘What do you give someone who has everything’ If I deck you

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 month

Try not to be the main character in Nigeria twitter for the next 3 days. E get why

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

It’s a shame that the only thing @elonmusk intellect can’t do is solve Nigeria’s power situation. All the brightest minds on earth have all tried and failed and Elon won’t be any different.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Probably my favorite photo.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

Note to self: Wear more suits

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

If you’re a very knowledgeable person and you’d love to win N2m/N3m, like this tweet. P.S This isn’t a joke

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

I actually think the idea of inviting someone (who was on their own) out for a date and insisting they split the bill with you is quite exceedingly stupid

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

My pops walked today for the first time in 6 months whew. Grateful

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

If it’s to turn Eba on Independence Day that’s when you’ll see Anthony Joshua.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Took so many Ls this year and the realization hit me that the number of Ls you take doesn’t really matter if all you need is one W. Your Ls will likely outnumber your Ws cos that’s life for you.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 month

Me and my Udemy courses:

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@AtiaAddicted

1 month

I made some fire ass wings last night do y’all know my son took a bite out of every single one

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

That photographer death na wetin sweet me pass for that Blood Sisters movie. He dey craze

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

I think Lagos has conditioned many of us to be on constant hyperdrive. That’s why I almost lose my damn mind whenever I’m in a a city with no sense of urgency.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

This man will get to Lagos around December at this rate.

Kunle Adeyanju

@lionheart1759

2 years

The cocktail dance video I promised

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

35 years old man kissed 21 yr old babe then suddenly remembered they’re not mates lol

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

Important to note that the SARS have summarily executed more than 100 Nigerians within 3 years and not one has been executed so far. We don’t need a reform, we need them scrapped for good. #EndSARS

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Everyone has seen their jamb results except the people I sponsored. No wahala, I’ll ask them again next week

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Gave something to a beggar on our way back home and she asked me why a beggar deserved that much.

BABYBOSS KO F'OSHI

@tejumania

3 years

The most petty reason you refused to date someone?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

I have only ever been to ONE concert. Koko concert in 2012. Billed to start at 7pm but started at 11pm. As if that was not enough, D’banj came on stage at 2am and told all of us in regular to apologize to the folks in VIP

Olorogun

@Okkevwe

1 year

I've only ever been to ONE concert. It was Burna Boy, December 2019. Billed to perform at 9pm but didn't show up till 2am. I learned from the people there that this was a normal occurrence in Nigerian concerts. I never went for another one ever again. It really is that simple.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

You people saying “what’s wrong with asking” are sincerely part of the problems with this country

CHAT WITH BOYE ➐

@its_boye

2 years

That moment when NTA presenter asks the lead actress in wakanda what her name is. 🤦🏿‍♂️🤦🏿‍♂️🤦🏿‍♂️ #WakandaForever #WakandaForeverpremiere

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

When Burna Boy said Dangote still dey find money we didn’t even realize he knew something about the refinery. I Stan

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Would scale in Nigeria. There’s nothing Nigerians love more than exclusivity.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Every unfortunate occurrence happening in AJ’s life can be traced back to when he prostrated to Buhari

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

At the supermarket and this guys transaction declines cos of insufficient funds. Waiter tells him the reason for the decline In presence of everyone and he’s offers to buy her a microphone and speaker so she announces it very well. Nigerians are a hilarious bunch man

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Hushpuppi really ruined the life of one of his victims just so we could purchase a Richard Mille Wristwatch. See why I have no pity for him and his ilk. I hope he rots in Jail ❤️

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

20 days

I know at least 2 Nigerian guys on $10m+ quietly living in Lekki and still grinding like they’re poor.

King.sol 🇶🇦

@teddi_speaks

20 days

this guy made $8m from crypto in a month and retired. can $8m make you retire from crypto?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 month

OTP I requested from Zenith Bank since Friday just arrived today.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

6 months

Good time to share the Kevin O’Leary anti-billing method.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

6 months

A few months ago, I tried setting up something like this in Nigeria until one day when I realized the biggest factor inimical to the growth of this kind of business in Nigeria. If anyone can take a stab at telling me what that factor is, I’ll wire you $50

Alex Scott

@afscott

6 months

Perks of living in Dubai: fuel delivery for $0.76 USD per liter ($2.8 per gallon)

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Just dawned on me that Hushpuppi didn’t even make any attempt to Integrate his illegal funds back into the system to appear as legit. Just wake up, spend money and eat.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

All Tunde did was post a video of himself & his gf. Anyways nothing you people do on here shocks me anymore. I have said it time and time again that you people hate to see others flourishing

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

Advanced financial Modelling class coming up in August. If you’re interested in joining the class (Just 20 slots available) send an email to teachfin20 @gmail .com

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

5 years

Avoiding broke women.

PiggyVest

@PiggyBankNG

5 years

What is one personal finance tip that has worked for you?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Only reason I want to be rich is so that I spend my time however I want without having to anguish over the financial implications.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

Wonder why Governor Adeleke is making noise over N300bn+ debt. Has he considered speaking with Omojuwa ?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

You people are fools

Naija

@Naija_PR

3 years

Wow!!! Nigerians are Talented!! A young boy who invented his own ATM machine!!🙏🙏

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

5 years

Think there’s something about me that makes the house rent of women expire as soon as they meet me.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

My 30th birthday is tomorrow and I have just one wishlist. Need everyone of you who give an F about me to sow a $30 seed into my life through @chessinslums . I never ask for stuff but I’m dead serious about this one. It’s something I’d really really appreciate

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

Driver = 300k Chef = 300k Mopol = 300k Then live on 100k 👍

SisiYėmmié.com 🌶

@Sisi_Yemmie

1 year

Your Salary is 1 Million Naira per month, how are you spending it?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Did they come in at 3am ?

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

4 years

We desperately need to come out of this with a win else we risk a reprisal from an emboldened SARS who know they have the backing of the govt.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

LIONEL MESSI WON THE WORLD CUP IN MY LIFETIME

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Happy to pay a small fee so I never get to see portable’s content ever again on the internet.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

I think Elon Musk is the only person on earth with Fuck you money

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

2 years old bank just acquired a 100+ years old bank. What God cannot do does not exist 🕺🏻

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

10 months

Even South Africa with one of the highest HIV prevalence rate in Africa is at 15%. There’s no way in the world you’d achieve 60% prevalence with a random sample in Nigeria. It’s impossible.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

11 months

They said we shouldn’t add water to our goat meat as per it produces it’s own water now my Asun don burn finish. O ga o

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

5 months

Igbo kids of today have no idea what it feels like to travel to the east with “luxurious bus” Good times

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 months

Had a client who insults the hell out of PO whenever I visit his office. Didn’t say pim throughout until he signed my contract and paid me my money.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

It’s not the time to remind us that you earn in USD abeg

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Speaking of great bosses, I hear Otedola is one hell of a fantastic person to work with

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Still weird how one of my favorite guys in the office just went ‘on leave’ then called me out of the blues to inform me he’s never coming back to Naija. Still dey burst my head 😂

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Emefiele is actually a very brilliant person. Made a first class & topped his class in UNN. Got a PhD at age 32 and did his MBA at Harvard. Never judge a book by its cover. I also made this shit up.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

7 years

Part B. #IStandWithNigeria This man's speech gave me goosebumps.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

11 months

Once they reply you with the subject “Update on your application” just know say na breakfast

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 years

Rejection actually isn’t that bad. Everyone can’t be into you and that’s okay.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 month

Anyways my own is this is why Nigeria has to work in our lifetime.

Paul

@pllski

1 month

@SemudaraAbayomi Hi Bayomi, It's not my job to conform to the way that you do things. You want to do business with Americans, you have to do things the way WE do things, not complain that we're being biased. You can say the same thing about me, which is true. But I don't care about doing any…

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

1 year

Couple of folks have hit me up to explain what’s happening at SVB so I’m taking a short break from my twitter hiatus to explain the SVB wahala in simple, plain, no-finance-jargon English. This is going to be a long ass thread but hopefully it explains all you need to know

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 months

You no go fold ke

Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

3 months

Called my landlady in Nigeria and paid her 3 months advance service charge this morning. She will understand why very soon

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Dialysis sessions can cost up to N200k per week incase you needed the motivation to tame excessive drinking.

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

At the airport and this complete stranger walks up to me to plead that I assist him with checking-in his luggage with my identity cos he’s carrying excess luggage. Haven’t seen this kind of liver before

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Ewgi

@Ssaasquatch

2 years

Least favorite thing about clubbing in Lagos is the involuntary appearance in snap stories of complete strangers.

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