My flight was delayed a few times, the pilot just got on and apologized and said “Don’t worry about the time folks we’re gonna fly this thing like we stole it.” 💀
I accidentally ordered an Uber from Texas to Los Angeles today (I was going to the airport) and why did my driver show up down to do the 26 hour trip. 💀
The youngest person in my house is 18 and I’m looking around like where are all the lilttle children?! Then I realized I was supposed to bring some. Lmao we going extinct.
Being a “bad bitch” is exhausting the nails, the hair, the gym, the makeup, the clothes, the skin care regime, the going outside… I’m finna be a “good bitch” cause I’m TIRED.
@kennysroys
He was like bet, “that’s at least 5k and the gps says I could do it in 21 hours right now cause traffic isn’t bad!” HE PUT IT IN THE GPS!!! 🤣
My cousin in Trinidad won’t get the vaccine cuz his friend got it & became impotent. His testicles became swollen. His friend was weeks away from getting married, now the girl called off the wedding. So just pray on it & make sure you’re comfortable with ur decision, not bullied
My sister telling me that she saw several videos about me on TikTok being racist as fuck broke my heart. Me and my sister are 13 years apart she’s like my child and her having to see this shit broke me. I don’t know what’s wrong with you people but you need to seek help.
I’ll never forget how my 8th grade English teacher in Miami taught us a whole lesson on how, by definition, there is zero irony in the lyrics of “Ironic” by Alanis Morissette. A petty icon.
Yeah yeah parasocial relationships are bad but Steve from Blues clues saying he was proud of me and he never forgot about me is getting me through so leave me alone.
Ruby Bridges, the first Black child to desegregate the all-white William Frantz Elementary School in Louisiana in 1960, celebrated her 69th birthday at Allegory in DC
This is so confusing to me because I always love the drops but only Indiana Jones and his fedora could find the damn clothes!! It’s not selling but it’s always sold out??? Somebody call Math!
More celebrity brands are failing.
Adidas is set to lose $200M on Beyoncé’s Ivy Park this year. That's on top of a $1.3B loss from Yeezy.
What went wrong? In order to work, a celeb brand needs to get three things right:
I twote a VERY verifiable fact about credit being a scam now I’m being bombarded by capitalist boot lickers saying I’m down bad. Sweetie I’m doing better than you & I still want to dismantle the system I was able to prosper in. Y’all are weirddd. Why doesn’t “mute” really work?!
I used to work in service so I tip aggressively, I tip too much, I empathize with bad service cause like maybe they were busy or having a bad day?? I tip even if I hate the servers soul but then I steal all their pens but I still tip.
@vinn_ayy
It’s so wild that people are rooting for this man to nickel & dime us for an app we used for free for over a decade. Cost of living is high, wages are low, and people want to pay a billionaire to generate content for him. Lmao We will never be free!
I guess it’s time I share with Twitter that yes, I was on Real housewives of New York. I was paid in a week of free food to pretend to interview at a place I already worked at. Lmao
#RHONY
This dark skinned Black man in first class just told me I was very pretty and that he isn’t normally attracted to dark skin women. I’m gonna jump off the planet now. Also I’m WAY hotter than him and he has 2 phones he a criminal so am I but im a better one!! 😩🤣
I think it’s so dope
@Sethrogen
is normalizing and stylizing weed. Weed taken properly is SO much more healthy than liquor and we need to talk about it and move forward. So much of the stigma has come from it being a carceral tool of oppression for people of color, we off that.
I shouldn’t have been cursing in this response but I was really caught off guard by the onslaught of racist trolls. I deleted a lot of comments but they keep coming on every platform. Being a Black woman is exhausting. We all deserve better.
OMG every time I go to
#HomeDepot
they say I’m too cute to have a regular construction job!! I just got home from building a 8 bedroom house, now I’m making pasta and lobster for my king then reading the Bible on OF. 🫶🏾
Monopoly was created by a woman to show the perils of capitalism then a man stole it. Monopoly is trash once one person starts winning you can’t catch up then your cousin Jermonica throws a hotel at you that leaves a permanent scar. Let’s cancel monopoly this is not personal btw.
Millennials deserve student loan forgiveness, we were born into climate change, 911, a recession, rampant racism, data mining/exploiting phones, and a global pandemic. The girls are tired. Give it up! We didn’t get Woodstock and do nothing 9-5’s where everyone is drunk by noon!!!
Truly don’t know why people are so upset about the top Black women athletes taking breaks for their mental health. YOU BASICS HAVE A CHANCE AT WINNING THIS YEAR! 🤣
I loved The Menu so much as an artist because of this specific relationship. A lot of critics can dissect work down to each specific ingredient BUT THEY CAN’T COOK. Critique is valid and necessary but at the end of the day as artists we have to remember these mf’s can’t cook.
I don’t even want to be petty about this. Historically everything Black people have fought for in this country has benefited all marginalized people. Y’all really need to stop aligning with your oppressor and hating on us for helping YOU. Shame.
The last time I was on TMZ was the iCarly mess and I literally had to move because I was doxxed. I’m not a “podcaster” I’m an artist. I am a human being. I work so hard and I protect Black women. This weekend made me so sad but it’s over now we moving on.
I’m sitting on my white couch in silk pajamas with a glass of wine waiting for my food delivery. I’m literally all those opulent, single, career obsessed Black women tropes I used to make fun of on TV. 🤣
I’m in my trailer crying tears of joy because this acting journey has been HARD on my spirit. It went from people calling me slurs everyday to real
#iCarly
fans expressing so much for the love art we put our hearts in. I work with the most kind & talented people, I’m overjoyed.
I’m gonna thug it out y’all can’t break me. I’ve been through too much. But fuck you weirdos, being a Black woman is so hard but so lit I’m gonna go harder you’ll be mad forever. ✌🏾
My grandmother legitimately convinced me as a child that only Black people were good at things. I remember hearing a Christina Aguilera song and being genuinely confused that she could sing. 💀 I now realize she gave me the best armor against a world that thinks the opposite.
Well time to share before this app goes to hell. I was hacked less than 36 hours after
@Twitter
was taken over by, you know who. I’ve confirmed my followers were scammed out of thousands of dollars and it’s a direct result of Twitter’s negligence. A thread. 🧵
We gotta talk about Gen Z. They told us we couldn’t have a side part, skinny jeans, and this “😂” emoji. It’s giving young Boomer yet I want to please these unemployed bullies. 🗣 MILLENNIALS ASEMBLE!!
Can we talk about how Jim from The Office was a jerk to every woman he dated and we just thought it was cute cause he yearned for Pam. I’d actually NEVER want to meet a “Jim” he was a DEMON!
Maya Angelou proudly and openly talked about being a sex worker. There’s nothing wrong with that profession and you can be a prolific genius at the same time, it’s just a job. Y’all don’t read lmao
If your “podcast” is on video it’s a YouTube show. If I have to put on makeup for your “podcast” it is NOT a podcast. I don’t care if you release the audio too. I got into podcasting for a break from visual mediums stop lying to me or I’m not coming!
@hollywood2cq
Sweetie, I literally stated a fact. Credit is predatory as hell and paying off credit cards in full LOWERS your score. Stop licking them boots and go back to what you said you be doing…
Please stop with the Handmaids Tale shit THIS LITERALLY HAPPENED IN AMERICA TO BLACK/ INDIGENOUS WOMEN AND NOW WE ARE ALL HEADED BACK THERE READ A BOOK WEIRDOS!!
not Ayo Edebiri addressing her resurfaced jokes about Jennifer Lopez’s whole career being a scam during an SNL sketch lol
“Okay. We get it. It's wrong to leave mean comments or run your mouth on a podcast and you don't consider the impact because you're 24 and stupid...”
I talked to my therapist yesterday about the fact that if I was white my podcast would be making me millions. Like, Jesus why do I try so hard when being white could enable me to do absolutely NOTHING. Maybe I’ll take my Black face off the key art. REMEMBER ME WHITE! 🤣
I have reached full capacity for microaggressions. If you come at me sideways with oppressive undertones I will clear you immediately. Black people work thrice as hard to get half as much. I deserve to be in every room I step into and you will respect me.
Lmao people are still so shook when they realize that I think highly of myself. Just because the world taught YOU dark skin Black women have no value does not mean I believe it.