Jemaine Clement @AJemaineClement Twitter profile

Pinned Tweet

Jemaine Clement

3 years

Hey guys, just took this selfie... ____________________________________________________ Twitter has removed this image. (too sexy) ____________________________________________________

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Last Seen Profiles

@zsk009

@endaomentdotorg

@DravenNoctis

@LadyPurpleHoops

@jasoninthehouse

@JG4Justice

@ruthpaztini

@JoventutsScc

@Pentabaneao

@enajahthe1

@mediapython

@DeanShelto35864

@sporttvportugal

@KIMEPerformance

@yuchinsound

@KumagaiKazunori

@GENERAL_nogifra

@ClassPointMENA

@Romantic_guy143

@MarkDaviesUK

@Rodge_This

@lisasmars

@RDS_official

@Season2_sora

@RodneyRikai

@PanDulceHotWife

@PeteKnow_

@Eve_Goddess_

@Esdeath1sweetie

@HenryIkwunemere

@MrIsanama

@DZST4CH1

@bybenn34

@ChristianM_95

@FinalBossFutbol

@MidlothianISD

Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

Just want to congratulate @TaikaWaititi on this brilliant review that he has given himself. So proud of you!

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

Good luck guys.

The A.V. Club

@TheAVClub

5 years

Rami Malek to hunt a serial killer with Denzel Washington

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Easy to talk shit about them when they're not around.

UberFacts

@UberFacts

3 years

Some dinosaurs had dandruff

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

1 year

It's been 2023 in NZ for 14 minutes and it's been okay so far. Happy New Year!!

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

A dollar per death @realDonaldTrump

Mark Knoller

@markknoller

4 years

At press briefing, McEnany displays $100,000 check Pres Trump donating from his presidential salary to @HHSGov for development of medications to prevent and treat Coronavirus.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

Condolences to all of the people whose cats they named "Bret and Jemaine" about 13 years ago and are dying now.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

In case you're wondering who would possibly still live in Trump Tower.

TMZ

@TMZ

5 years

Cops Confront R. Kelly at Trump Tower to Check on 2 Women Allegedly Being Held Hostage

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Good on this Aussie guy not accepting these bullshit answers.

Axios

@axios

4 years

. @jonathanvswan : “Oh, you’re doing death as a proportion of cases. I’m talking about death as a proportion of population. That’s where the U.S. is really bad. Much worse than South Korea, Germany, etc.” @realdonaldtrump : “You can’t do that.” Swan: “Why can’t I do that?”

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

7 years

Hitler - failed painter Trump - cancelled tv host Bannon - failed documentary maker Conway - failed stand-up Support the arts and media

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

6 years

Trump met our Prime Minister.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

1 year

Humbled to be included in this list of dads that people would like to F in 2022.

archive dilfs

@archivedilfs

1 year

TOP DILFS OF THE YEAR 48 • Jemaine Clement

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Yet they fight pretty hard to keep the statues of the slave owners.

Charlie Kirk

@charliekirk11

4 years

The Republican Party freed the slaves.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Release Bill and Ted 3 on the same day.

CONSEQUENCE

@consequence

4 years

Keanu will do battle with... Keanu as The Matrix 4 and John Wick 4 both head to theaters on May 21st, 2021: #Matrix4

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Check out my DADSONLY page. DADSONLY is the only site with exclusive pictures and videos of fathers taking out rubbish, connecting cables, lounging on chairs and wearing swimwear that is between 3 - 20 years old...

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

I've never heard of someone without a gun going to a school and killing 21 people.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

It's like when all the traps get re-opened in ghostbusters.

Forbes

@Forbes

2 years

Not Just Trump: Here Are The Other Notorious Names—Jones, Shkreli, Yiannopoulos Included—Who Could Be Unbanned On Twitter

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

1 month

So.... "chess"?

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

That's not exactly the same.

New Scientist

@newscientist

2 years

Ever caught a whiff of a familiar perfume and been reminded of a friend? Dolphins do much the same thing, by tasting each other's urine

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

If I ever defund my government's pandemic response team to save cash, mislead the public into thinking the virus is not a threat while privately admiting it is, discourage people from taking simple precautionary measures, then yeah, make fun of me if I get it. But only then!

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Exactly a year ago we were thanking fuck that 2019 was over! Happy 2021 from NZ. So far, 5 mins in and it seems okay.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

We're just lucky this app was invented at the very same time we all became experts.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

9 months

A real reminder to check the guest wing of your castle.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Haha! Yeah, in other countries we're always popping down to the doctor's to see if they'll give us extra health care!

The Wall Street Journal

@WSJ

5 years

Elizabeth Warren’s Medicare for All plan risks unintended consequences such as overuse of health care, @Greg_Ip writes

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

9 months

First trip overseas @bret_rospective and I played a show to 1 in Vancouver. Didn't find out till the end that they'd left during the show. We based a scene in our tv show on it. Years later we did the pretty much the same show at the Hollywood Bowl to around 18,000 people.

Georgie Grier

@georgie_grier

9 months

There was one person in my audience today when I performed my one woman play, ‘Sunsets’ at #edfringe . It’s fine, isn’t it? It’s fine…? 🥹

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

9 months

So sad to learn Paul Reubens has died. I was excited to have him in one of my eps of WWDITS. He brought his wig from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which he'd had modeled on his infamous mugshot - because, he said "it was the coolest I've ever looked". He made every line hilarious.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

6 years

Good news is I'm learning not to say "fuck off" to Americans as it seems to be about 10 times more offensive to them than to people from any other English speaking country.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

The straight pride parade is so embarrassing I'm afraid of telling my parents that I'm straight.

Kelly Sullivan

@ksullivannews

5 years

The #StraightPrideParade now on its way to City Hall Plaza. #Boston25

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

It's 2020 here in NZ now. The first 8 minutes have been pretty good. Happy New Year!

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Atom was split by Earnest Rutherford from NZ. Phone was invented by Alexander Graham Bell from Scotland. World War l and II - group effort but US were there for some of it. Internet - not as good as we thought it was going to be.

The White House 45 Archived

@WhiteHouse45

4 years

"Americans harnessed electricity, split the atom, and gave the world the telephone and the internet. We settled the Wild West, won two World Wars, landed American Astronauts on the Moon—and one day soon, we will plant our flag on Mars!" — President @realDonaldTrump

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

I will be taking some time away from social media.

elba

@ellebuh

3 years

The people have spoken and they’re wrong!! I know in my heart that it’s you @AJemaineClement

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

Hey people of the USA. What We do In The Shadows THE SERIES is now on Hulu.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

As effective as expected.

Rex Chapman🏇🏼

@RexChapman

3 years

Live look at Trump’s impenetrable border wall...

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

One month ago.

The Onion

@TheOnion

4 years

Man Just Buying One Of Every Cleaning Product In Case Trump Announces It’s Coronavirus Cure

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Sweden has a population of 10 million, 14,662 people have died of covid. NZ has 5 million, 26 people have died of covid. Thanks for your advice but we're okay.

Au/Ag995

@RassFaber

3 years

@nzpolice Sweden: zero covid related deaths for a month You: 🤡 Greetings from Scandinavia

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

I remember having to convince producers to let this guy direct a few episodes of FOTC and now look - he has close to 100 Bafta nominations.

Taika Waititi

@TaikaWaititi

4 years

This is amazing. 6 is also an upside down 9 so it's basically TEN NOMINATIONS!!! Thank you @bafta for this honour of almost one hundred Bafta Nominations!! So insane!!! 💕 @jojorabbitmovie

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

Fly my creatures of the night.

FX Networks

@FXNetworks

2 years

Undead and ready to keep this party going. What We Do in the Shadows has been renewed for two more seasons.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Rigged.

Morning Report

@NZMorningReport

3 years

#BREAKING New Zealand’s moss-colored flightless parrot, the kākāpo climbs to the top and wins Bird of the Year 2020.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

Have you thought of maybe letting in more immigrants?

CNBC

@CNBC

5 years

Aging US population is creating major job shortages in health care, says CEO of staffing solutions provider AMN

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Now we can take over.

Danny Zuker

@DannyZuker

3 years

Already missing Daft Punk.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

By saying "Jemaine, adapt it for TV, bro! I'm going to make Thor!" @TaikaWaititi

How Taika Waititi Adapted the Vampire Comedy 'What We Do in The Shadows' for American TV

How 'What We Do in the Shadows' made the transition to TV.

www.thrillist.com

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

I wrote 22 drafts of the What We do in the Shadows pilot over a year. And that's just a sitcom.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

In bed tripping off my nut and thinking about chess again.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Someone fucked a tree.

The Independent

@Independent

4 years

100-million-year-old giant sperm found preserved in amber is oldest ever, scientists believe

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Current active cases in NZ: 37 in the White House: 34

Aaron Rupar

@atrupar

4 years

Ronna McDaniel, who is currently quarantined with coronavirus, says she doesn't think there were any problems with the White House's coronavirus protocols

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

You know who has been good about not rubbing everyone's noses in this is vegans.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

7 months

Adele K Thomas

@AdeleKThomas

7 months

A fictional character who has the same name as you.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 months

Chance to laugh at Australian men crying because girls are going to go to a school they used to go to.

9News Sydney

@9NewsSyd

3 months

One of Sydney's oldest boys' schools is going co-ed, leaving some parents furious about what they call the "woke agenda" behind the move. #9News READ:

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

6 years

Guys, these guys are working on a new tweet.

Los Angeles Times

@latimes

6 years

We deleted a tweet with outdated information. New tweet coming shortly

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Here is some NZ to look at. Until you can visit. One day. Not today. But one day.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

1 year

All of the dumbest people I know believe shit they read on social media.

Elon Musk

@elonmusk

1 year

Some of the smartest people I know actively believe the press … amazing

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 months

Reporting from Jan 1, 2024 in NZ. Okay so far.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Oh no. A lot of people I know have done this.

Ken Olin

@kenolin1

4 years

Umm. His mind is oatmeal.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Uninstalled an app from my computer and it thanked me for using it. So anyway, feeling pretty bad right now.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

6 years

Littlefingers.

Donald J. Trump

@realDonaldTrump

6 years

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

New ink. #dadjokes #onlydads #dadsonly

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

6 years

@realDonaldTrump The time has come for diplomacy and compromise. You're both fat.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

The first known cases of Spanish flu were reported in Kansas.

The White House 45 Archived

@WhiteHouse45

4 years

Spanish Flu. West Nile Virus. Zika. Ebola. All named for places. Before the media’s fake outrage, even CNN called it “Chinese Coronavirus.” Those trying to divide us must stop rooting for America to fail and give Americans real info they need to get through the crisis.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

And maybe it is.

Dentist Bob….🥌

@RetiredDent

3 years

I’m telling people this is Johnson & Johnson.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

This starts on Wednesday, suckers. #ShadowsFX

What We Do In The Shadows

@theshadowsfx

5 years

Who needs a soul when you have many frock coats. #ShadowsFX

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

Nice one.

Stuff

@NZStuff

5 years

Flat Earthers hold conference in Auckland, with speakers from around the globe

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

6 years

Good news. It's 2018 in NZ already and it's not bad so far. Happy New Year!

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

UK will not recover from this burn. This is worse than Brexit.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

Why are they called X wings when they have a different alphabet? This has been on my mind since I was 7.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

6 years

#WellingtonParanormal is on the case.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

6 years

Awwwww mannnn....

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

Oh, in what way?

HuffPost

@HuffPost

5 years

Ice Cube's new track "Arrest The President" is a pointed dig at Donald Trump.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

Those Māori marching today saying vaccinations are a form of colonialism have to remember that the deadliest thing colonialism brought to indigenous peoples everywhere was disease that our ancestors had no defence against.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

Huge amount of people tonight unifying in Wellington, mourning those people Christchurch. Beautiful to hear English, Arabic and Maori all spoken with the same message, one against hate. Kia kaha, kia kotahi. As salaam alaikum.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

7 years

You'd better be right about this.

UberFacts

@UberFacts

7 years

Apes laugh when they are tickled.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

It's cute. But come on...

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

7 years

Could just hold a sign that says "not great in a war".

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

New Zealand but the other way around.

Nish Kumar

@MrNishKumar

4 years

How Britain sees itself How the world see us

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

@realDonaldTrump Oh no, you haven't heard. The other guy got 75,000,000 legal votes.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

7 years

Jared Kushner looks like he's the stage between Tom Riddle and Voldemort.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

This is my home town paper, by the way.

Pete Herlihy

@yahoo_pete

5 years

Brexit is crazy and all that, but spare a thought for the shit going down in New Zealand right now...

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Scifi movies did not predict this.

The Independent

@Independent

4 years

Bar uses giant rubber rings to enforce social distancing between customers

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Bret acted as a vampire in the short film version of Shadows but we cut him out because he kept laughing. The Vampire name he chose for himself was "Bret".

Nellie Litta Porta🍒

@cherryblond83

3 years

@AJemaineClement We know how Jemaine looks like a vampire. But imagine Bret. A polite vampire who needs 6 weeks to be intimate to bite someone

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

The second one was actually taken only 2 days later.

Fans of the Conchords

@fotc_fans

4 years

2009 vs 2019

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

The irony of people from the most pervasive colonising country in history complaining about immigrants being let into their country.

The Poke

@ThePoke

4 years

Only 5 responses you need to the ranty Question Time woman who wants our borders ‘completely closed’.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

@TaikaWaititi You need to make notes of these things in your calendar.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 years

The other guy sitting in the exit row on the plane with me gave me a "we got this" nod when the flight attendant asked if we'd help in an emergency. We're a team now.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Found some.

Russell Brown

@publicaddress

3 years

A Trump supporter in Pennsylvania is being charged with voter fraud and forgery for allegedly requesting an absentee ballot for his dead mother. via @HuffPostPol

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Trump's pardons list.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

A thread.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 months

🎂

comfort for brugh fans

@somelikeitbrugh

4 months

10 years ago on this date, January 19th 2014, What We Do in the Shadows made its world premiere in the Sundance Film Festival. Becoming a vampiric cult sensation. 🦇

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Put them in a room together and let them cancel themselves out.

NowThis Impact

@nowthisimpact

4 years

Trumpers in Arizona: 'Count the votes!' Trumpers in Michigan: 'Stop the count!' 🤔🤔🤔

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

I love scientists and I love Van Morrison so now I don't know who to trust when it comes to science.

The Independent

@Independent

4 years

Van Morrison condemns ‘crooked facts’ of scientists in new anti-lockdown songs

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

@realDonaldTrump Amazing to think America was once a scientific leader.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

I do not remember doing this.

Fans of the Conchords

@fotc_fans

3 years

#OnThisDay in 2008, HBO aired the first promo for Flight of the Conchords' Season 2.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

NZ leading the headlines yet again.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

2 months

Some people can't handle that we rapped about reality.

j 🇵🇸

@janhopi

2 months

I'm pretty Flight of the Conchords sympathetic but 00s comedy gangsta rap parodies were a really dark time for the culture

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

The guy who got covid after refusing to stop shaking hands.

The Independent

@Independent

4 years

Boris Johnson says he would not take the knee: 'I don't believe in gestures'

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Fellas, make sure they put the needle in your arm.

Nicki Minaj

@NICKIMINAJ

3 years

My cousin in Trinidad won’t get the vaccine cuz his friend got it & became impotent. His testicles became swollen. His friend was weeks away from getting married, now the girl called off the wedding. So just pray on it & make sure you’re comfortable with ur decision, not bullied

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

This is the end. I feel like I wasted your time. Sorry again.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

"guys, form into megabird"

New Scientist

@newscientist

3 years

This amazing photograph by @INPHOjames shows a murmuration of thousands of starlings appearing like a single giant creature

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

Looking forward to seeing Robert Downey Jr and Helen Mirren in Fart Fight University.

DiscussingFilm

@DiscussingFilm

4 years

Warner Bros has signed a deal for a AI-driven film management system which will help decision-making for greenlighting certain films. The AI system can assess an actor’s value in any territory and how much a film is expected to earn in theaters. (Source: )

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

4 years

If you'd had a proper lockdown and people had followed the advice of the medical experts you'd be out of this already.

Laura Ingraham

@IngrahamAngle

4 years

Remember, if you vote for Biden, you are voting for a lockdown.

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

3 years

Too many!

IFLScience

@IFLScience

3 years

Man Hospitalized After Putting 15 Boiled Eggs Up His Anus

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Jemaine Clement

@AJemaineClement

5 years

My ol' co-director from WWDITS is trying to make a go of it by himself. Please support him.

Taika Waititi

@TaikaWaititi

5 years

Bet you didn't realise you wanted another @jojorabbitmovie poster, did you? Well you did, and here it is! And it's got people on it! (actual sizes of people may differ from those advertised) ✌️ #JojoRabbit In theaters October 18

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