Brian Posehn @thebrianposehn Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@C_AdamskiTrib

@noam_dworman

@hadiagul81

@Ghostopheles

@trldee

@harisendrill_xx

@DaniilTrue

@Paxos

@DavidMTodd

@Saitama_keren

@barralessteph

@tomoariyu

@Montecitorio

@semimiruku

@GoVadik

@lilyapepper

@junkywax

@sailittt

@thecruelpoet

@MFITZ13

@miina3538049254

@SallakDonya

@yawnfeeling

@c3_d

@_joseDINERO_

@ambular_93

@enspiration_eth

@GinoTheGhost

@spenno1990

@Alloushphoenix

@McQuillanBros

@HIFKHockey

@ryukk_____

@janiengberg

@DNA_fi

@jiasuke

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

Ecstatic nerd in nerd cave freaking out over being in Star Wars canon while family sleeps. Holy shit! #TheMandalorian

1K

2K

41K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

One of the hardest times I’ve ever laughed was during the Bob Saget Roast as @normmacdonald ate it on purpose, gleefully digging in on a bit that the live audience wasn’t buying. Meanwhile, the other comics and myself were in tears and in awe of one of the funniest humans ever.

204

934

20K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Time for another friendly reminder, I am not Randy Quaid.

598

580

19K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

A friendly reminder. #iamnotrandyquaid

662

1K

14K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Aww man, not George. I grew up watching him, total old school charm, effortless comedic timing. Doing scenes with him was one of the highlights of my life, but getting to know him a little and making the legend laugh was even cooler. I’ll miss you, sir. RIP George Segal.

112

733

10K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

My 12 year old has a friend over. They are currently listening to Iron Maiden and playing Halo. I will be accepting my Father of the Year award in a “Who Farted?” T-shirt and an open bathrobe.

166

285

10K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

10 months

We’ve been comedy pals since grunge and dial up, me and the little fella would travel all over the west coast listening to mix tapes I made and making Steven Seagal jokes. Love these two hilarious humans with all of my Ice Troll heart. Fun to hang and watch them crush last night.

135

188

7K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Turned fifty-two. Decided to start saying “Oh. Look at that” whenever food is placed in front of me.

101

360

7K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

1 year

Mr. Show Reunion on the strike line. My old pal/boss @mrbobodenkirk and my muppety face.

62

420

6K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

After 2 weeks of multiple health screens and asking everyone to quarantine, I surprised my closest inner circle with a trip to a private island where we could pretend things were normal just for a brief moment in time.

95

1K

6K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

8 months

Nineteen years ago today I married my best pal. Lucky bastard, I am. Love you, Melly.

0

41

6K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

For the first time in fifteen months, I’m in a hotel room about to eat Mexican food on a hotel bed in my underwear. Comedy is back, everyone.

82

105

5K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

Fuck this timeline. Definition of gut punched. I feel like I just lost my cool uncle. My cool uncle that was also the best rock drummer to ever live. So sad there will never be Rush 50, still thought I’d see them one last time in Toronto doing a one off. RIP Neil Peart

109

516

5K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

If someone makes you have unwanted sex, it’s rape, right? So, what is it if someone makes you have an unwanted child? Asking for a friend(all women).

117

593

4K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Is there footage of Tomi Lahren getting water thrown at her? Asking for a masturbating friend.

77

288

4K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

1 year

Hey Tacoma, totaled the family van last night. I’m still coming though, it’ll take more than flipping a car off an embankment and crawling through glass to keep me away from yelling about my genitals on a comedy stage. See you tonight if I make this flight. Oh yeah, buy @Honda .

412

97

4K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

Aw man. I fucking loved that dude. I’ll never see him in an airport and talk shit about Stamos again. What a kick in the gut. RIP Bob Saget. Loved you, sir. My heart breaks for @JohnStamos and @DaveCoulier , so sorry, fellas.

16

99

4K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

Nooo. I loved Leslie Jordan. RIP. We did scenes together a million years ago in a zombie western comedy and he was the fucking best.

23

57

4K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

The brand new 7-11 near me is so nice it’s weird. The parking lot isn’t even sketchy yet. I might start stabbing people and giving out hand jobs. #doingmypart

102

246

4K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

Happy National Dog Day!

64

77

3K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

@RepMTG @JoeBiden Yeah? Well, I just farted in a thousand envelopes and sent them to random people and challenged my mom’s ghost to Mario Kart 64.

80

124

3K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

There are hundreds of thousands of butterflies migrating through LA and the valley right now? Not on my watch, I’ll be on Ventura and Balboa with my shirt off handing out butterfly punches til I pass out.

69

220

3K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

@pattonoswalt That dude isn’t married and he only makes babies on his stomach while he’s yelling at porn.

56

22

3K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Please excuse one more sappy tweet, but my Nor-Cal Social Worker Lifelong Democrat Single Mom would be so ecstatic about Kamala and Joe right now. Sorry you missed this by ten months, mom.

77

29

3K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

No. They fucking don’t. It’s as “hands off” as JAWS.

Observer

@observer

5 years

Great Scott! Audiences Really Want a ‘Back to the Future’ Reboot

2K

154

729

117

272

3K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

Dammit. Again, people, I’m not, nor have I ever been Randy Quaid. I have papers. Look at the difference.

Peter Stubbs

@PeterSt69301444

2 years

1st bad take: @thebrianposehn looks absolutely terrible here. 2nd bad take: Well, Northern border security clearly is a bigger issue than we'd been led to believe.

6

4

35

171

147

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

@travisakers @SarahKSilverman You, sir, are awesome.

10

30

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

No fucking shit. Glad our eyes weren’t wrong.

16

126

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Just cried in a cab in Omaha because my wife had to put our dog Ernie down without me. Now I’m heading to my hotel room to yell at the television like everyone else. Should be a fun show tonight.

387

26

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

Oh man, this is gonna make people shit themselves. I love these delightful weirdos so much.

40

93

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

7 months

I think I need a lawyer. The one on my left called me a Wookie.

99

59

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Of course, @pattonoswalt is hilarious as #MODOK on @hulu . It’s as brutal as it is funny. The big surprise, it’s got a sweet heart to it. And I play a hunky Asgardian in episode 6. Fucking typecasting. Walk your dog and start binging.

45

31

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

I didn’t wake up this morning as a person who loves Cardi B and then...

Brian Krassenstein

@krassenstein

5 years

Cardi B just let loose on Trump.

801

5K

15K

28

202

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

1 month

Can’t believe he’s gone. I’ll miss him. He had so much more… Oh wait, Happy Birthday, I guess.

Amber Tamblyn

@ambertamblyn

2 years

Happy Birthday to this complete weirdo. Somehow I still love you, David Cross, 14 years later.

306

182

17K

0

52

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

1 year

Merry Christmas you guys, sincerely, my dog Mavis.

67

25

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

56 year old me: Dude, in 2022 there’s a WEREWOLF BY NIGHT movie on TV and it’s really fucking great. 12 year old me: No way. Cooool. How’d I get so fat?

34

59

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Hey cops, next time you see a crazy white shooter, like tomorrow, can you pretend they’re a POC with a cell phone and light them up? We white people won’t care, I promise.

31

286

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

C’mon Bobby! I love you, you genius level goofball. Please pull through!!

17

47

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

What sucks is now we can’t read how mad he is at Twitter.

64

94

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

1 year

My son, Rhoads just started watching BETTER CALL SAUL with me. Loves my former boss, @mrbobodenkirk . He made custom Lego minis of the cast. From front left to right: Jimmy, Kim, Chuck with Space blanket, Howard, Mike. Back is Nacho and Tuco.

34

96

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

16 days

I took my fourteen year old son to see Too Short, Scarface, Xzibit, Mack 10 and Ice Cube on 4/20. I will be accepting my Dad of the Year award whenever the trophy is ready.

40

41

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

I’ve been waiting for heroin to be legal before I tried it. I see you Oregon.

27

77

2K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

My book Forever Nerdy is finally available everywhere TODAY. Please check it out.

73

148

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

I know what @davidcrosss and I are going as for Halloween.

51

46

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

I blew one dude in a Big and Tall fitting room and no one will let me forget it.

Cardi B

@iamcardib

5 years

Ya ever went shopping with your man and fucked in the fitting room?

3K

7K

72K

46

79

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

Uber driver switched Van Halen to the Counting Crows and I laughed because it’s early. Now he turned off Rush and it’s like I’m on a prank show called “Lose Your Fucking Shit!” Gotta breathe.

53

65

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Just in time for this Pink and Ginger Sasquatch to start performing in comedy clubs again. They broke seven needles on me.

46

20

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Plus do yourself a favor and pick up @normmacdonald ‘s book. One of the funniest things I’ve ever read. I have only called a handful of funny people a genius, he was one of them. I love you, Norm. RIP, you delightful weirdo.

14

73

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

I am a crusty 55 year old nerd who became an Andrew Garfield fan two days ago. Man, it feels real good to love instead of hate, fellow crusty nerds. #3 is a magic number.

46

22

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

I just rolled a natural 4:20. That’s when you’re smoking and you realize it’s 4:20 and you’re an unintentional cliche. And you’re a D&D nerd.

35

84

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Fourth time watching NOBODY. I might rate it even higher than I did on my first viewing. Beyond the “Holy shit, my friend of thirty years is kicking all ass and having a blast”, it’s also a tight screenplay, well directed and full of great performances.And @mrbobodenkirk rules!

30

37

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Trump’s latest pardons:

85

100

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

Dreams do come true. I wrote an episode of Rise Of The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. It’s got fighting, pizza and because I wrote it, a Mutant Rock band. Check it out on @Nickelodeon tomorrow morning. Watch it with your kid or your roommate Dave.

37

42

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

2/2 Fucking furious. She didn’t tell me because she didn’t want to cause a scene. Apparently a dude next to her on a flight when I wasn’t with her pulled the same shit. Dudes, just because you can watch porn everywhere now doesn’t mean you fucking should. Gross and clueless.

86

39

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Confirming my theory that Kim’s farts are terrible.

24

144

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Babies… funny babies.

Cat!Plant!

@lodu

3 years

Just going through some old files. 🥰 @pattonoswalt @thebrianposehn circa 1994

64

52

2K

44

25

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

Same vibe.

59

110

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

The answer is all four.

Kenneth Palermo

@kennypalermo

3 years

It’s 1987 ... which one do you go to?

11K

3K

27K

110

46

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

I just came up with a joke that referenced John Wick 3 and A Dog’s Journey and instead of sharing it with all of you I’m just gonna quit comedy.

31

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

1 year

@kangaroos991 Um… all of them. Weren’t we supposed to?

14

7

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Here's my Keurig video. #takethatkeurig

38

198

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Also in the tax plan: Smiles are taxed. Mermaid fishing is legal. May 12th is now Mandatory Shoot A Puppy In Its Face Day. Oh, and Mitch McConnell scribbled "rainbows are assholes!" on a Chick Fil A napkin, so that's in there too.

20

326

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

They are playing side one of Rush 2112 in the Bad Daddy’s Burger Bar at the Charlotte Airport and I’m kinda freaking out. I’m wondering how much they’re gonna play. How weird, it stopped at The Temples of Syrinx. Now I have to listen to 2112 on my iPod so I know how it ends.

42

30

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Thanks pal, tell your dad a lot of people love him. I think he knows.

Nate Odenkirk

@birthdaynate

3 years

He's going to be okay.

6K

26K

397K

5

18

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

Honest question, NYC/Brooklyn pals. I’m in Brooklyn right now. Rock bar that will play Rush all night while I drink most of their whiskey suggestions?

67

24

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

@HamillHimself @bader_diedrich You, sir are the best. Thanks so much. Today has been one of the coolest days ever.

15

14

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Finally, the silliest thing I’ve ever done premieres today. Check it out.

revolvermag

@Revolvermag

3 years

In need of a good laugh? Watch the world premiere of @brianposehn 's hilarious video for "New Music Sucks" featuring @alyankovic , @pattonoswalt , @falloutboy 's @trohman ... and is that Miley Cyrus?

18

43

277

55

69

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

@EverCarradine Oh, just this guy.

14

3

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

Want to feel young again? Smoke weed in front of a Radisson. When the dude reprimands you, I swear you’ll feel like you’re 15 for a whole minute.

29

47

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

I really hope somewhere in Hollywood Glenn Danzig just ran into a recording studio to lay down “Super Blood Wolf Moon”.

23

133

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

We will adopt your baby.

26

53

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Miss you. Vinnie. A total monster behind the kit and a blast to hang with. Way too soon, but go be metal gods with your brother. We get it. #ripvinniepaul

19

103

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

In 1998 I booked a guest role on The Closer with this amazing cast. On tape night, I’m in the make up chair between Selleck and Asner. Ed ripped one. A loud one. Tom winced and said, “Jesus, Ed…”. I giggled. Later, Ed played a Nazi in a Sarah Silverman ep I wrote. I love you Ed.

12

36

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

9 years

Thanks @alyankovic , my son and I had an amazing time. You rule!!! http://t.co/NTHJ9BNuTA

31

83

989

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

Just lost an eBay bid by ten seconds for an action figure of The Dude. And now I just want to go back to bed. I think that’s what The Dude would do. It really would’ve tied my nerd cave together.

55

15

1K

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

@pattonoswalt Oswalt! Goddammit.

17

4

988

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

I'm at KISS(packed Staples Center), and no shit, Paul Stanley just brought up the Coronavirus before he segued into "Dr. Love". "People are talking about sickness..." I blacked out for a second and then he said, "we all just need to call Dr. Love." We’re all gonna be okay, ya’ll.

29

77

954

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

Showing your dick should be like pulling out pictures of your dog or kid, you should only do it when someone asks to see it.

41

140

940

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

@UPROXX @adamlevine @Variety Why ask that dipshit eyebrow model a question about rock music anyway? It’s like asking me about all the fuck parties I get invited to.

16

67

884

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

2 years

The Peacemaker makes me sad when it ends. Holy shit, I love this show.

28

32

939

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

8 years

He knows, but I couldn't love my pal, @pattonoswalt more. I'm broken.

24

39

921

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

I’m truly one of our deep thinkers.

Jason

@jasondws

3 years

Thought for the day: "Crows are just goth pigeons" Brought to you by @thebrianposehn via #TopSecretVideos on @truTV

2

20

60

16

54

933

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 years

@pattonoswalt Fuck you, Oswald. You haven’t heard the Jay Sekulow Band crush their cover of Boston’s “Long Time”.

28

5

893

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

On Father’s Day my thoughts are really with all the families now separated by our fucking barbaric and heartless immigration policies. It’s heartbreaking.

18

107

883

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

9 years

If @TheRock said "I'm gonna eat your pussy off", women would swoon. I say it once in a Target and my wife wants a divorce.

26

414

878

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

My dad bribed my college by promising a new wing to the school, he also had Kurt Vonnegut help me with a paper and when I got injured, he helped my dive team win the championship. Oh wait, my dad died when I was two.

40

56

881

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

Holy shit, I’m in tears. I love Bumping Mics on @netflix . There is nothing funnier than @attell just fucking around with @realjeffreyross . Two funny friends, one total genius and @realjeffreyross .

28

38

883

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

So sorry to hear about @WWERomanReigns . Just know the Posehn family is rooting for you, you’re a super hero to us. #ThankYouRoman

2

31

833

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

5 years

This dude says Impossible Burgers are part of an evil plot. Satanic burgers? Metal AF. I should’ve pitched this to @_Brendonsmall for Metalocalypse.

Right Wing Watch

@RightWingWatch

5 years

Rick Wiles is warning you not to eat an Impossible Burger because they are part of a satanic plot to change human DNA and "create a race of soulless creatures on this planet.”

2K

835

2K

81

74

810

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

4 months

That ROBOCOP game for PS5 that I bought my kid for Christmas is awesome. More immersive 80s movie games, I say. PREDATOR, COMMANDO and BIG TROUBLE next please.

68

35

860

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

9 months

Living Colour just ripped my head off. Vernon’s guitar tone is nuckin futs.

0

33

854

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Wow. 90s grunge comic check list: flannel, backwards cap, pony tail. Dude, is that a swatch?

Flesh Daddy 🍥

@theJPLeonard

3 years

@thebrianposehn Findinf all these gems watching early 90’s A&E An Evening at the Improv

5

1

93

43

14

804

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

1 year

Thinking about my metal brothers and sisters at the Morbid Angel, Skeletal Remains, Revocation show in Belvidere, Il. What a terrifying story. Be safe out there.

20

56

805

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

10 months

Hey, the liberal left demoncrats are trying to cancel my last comedy special, don’t go to YouTube and watch it. …tee hee.

35

27

800

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

9 months

Here’s a better video of the mighty Vernon Reid of @LivingColour last night in Anaheim. He played all the notes. What a show! And Corey still has that voice. So impressive.

2

49

790

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

6 years

I just made fart noises over everything Sarah Sanders just said in a press conference. Alone. For ten minutes. Then I remembered I’m over fifty and I hate politics.

27

54

729

Brian Posehn

@thebrianposehn

3 years

Meanwhile at a certain Senator’s mansion.