Swan @swandating Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

How to make just about anyone fall in love with you (with science)

Swan | How to make just about anyone fall in love with you

Falling in love is no mean feat. It requires the perfect constellation of biochemical attraction, romantic compatibility, lifestyle alignment, shared values, and so on... or does it? What if you...

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

11 months

Most dating apps in the UK are 85% men or more. We've been working to change this for a while... and have just done the latest maths on our members. 👇 🎉🥳👯‍♀️

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Swan

@swandating

7 months

T̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶r̶s̶e̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶r̶u̶e̶ ̶l̶o̶v̶e̶ ̶n̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶r̶u̶n̶ ̶s̶m̶o̶o̶t̶h̶ ̶ Meet Annie and Jasper. 💕

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Swan

@swandating

11 months

It's rare to find a question in behavioural science that has an unequivocal answer. This is one of them.

Swan | Are right-wing people more attractive?

A recent Danish study used machine learning to predict political bias based on facial analysis. Its accuracy was better than chance. What's more, it found that good-looking faces were more likely to...

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

10 months

New blog: what makes people cheat on their partners? Featuring excerpts from our survey on infidelity, as shown. Link in next tweet ⬇️

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Our web app launches today. If you've completed the character assessment, keep an eye on your inbox.😎

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

We are now imprisoning our CTO until link previews work properly.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Our character assessment is now live, and everyone on the UK waiting list has been invited to complete it. Welcome aboard 🥰

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Swan

@swandating

8 months

We've just launched our latest product: Psyche. Learn what our AI thinks of you at

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

And, of course, no article about age gaps would be complete without the seminal graphs from OKCupid:

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

We're now collecting reviews on @Trustpilot . Thanks to one of our lovely members for kicking things off 🥰 🍾

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

"Now, a new generation is attempting to soothe our choice fatigue by urging single citizens to relax and leave things in their hands. A clear example is start-up dating site Swan"

Dating apps are changing. Swiping is out and romance is in

As people start to feel burnt out, the dating industry is responding with innovation

inews.co.uk

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Today is a good day: we've just sent the first two of these emails. Here's to the recipients! 🍾

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

👀

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Nonetheless: if you're partner-hunting, the evidence says you're most likely to find happiness with someone born 1-4 years either side of you. And bear in mind that social stigma can bind couples together (we've written about it), but it can also be their downfall. Choose wisely!

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

We love making your life easier. Soon, you'll be able to share your availability for the next 30 days without sending so much as an email. ⚙️🔧

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

... but so do human women! Women under 25 have a significantly higher risk of miscarriage than those aged 25-35, and infants are more likely to be stillborn to mothers aged 24 or younger than they are to mothers aged 25-39.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

If you're used to the apps, it's easy to see dating as something basically adversarial: you both want something from each other, and if you don't think you'll get it then you write them off. We think about things differently:

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Swan

@swandating

8 months

Psyche is free to everyone who's completed their character assessment – you'll just need to be logged in to see it. Let us know what you think!

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

And here it is: the longread on whether physical attractiveness is subjective. 🧵

elle

@ellegist

1 year

threading all of this over at @swandating in a sec!

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Of course, there are exceptions.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

...whereas for women, having a partner who is either considerably older or considerably younger tends to shorten lifespan. The greater the age gap (in either direction), the shorter her life.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Male chimpanzees are lowkey obsessed with older women:

Male Chimpanzees Prefer Mating with Old Females

Cross-cultural studies indicate that women's sexual attractiveness generally peaks before motherhood and declines with age [1]. Cues of female youth are thought to be attractive because humans...

www.cell.com

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

We've blogged on faith, love, and gender norms:

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

"People would be surprised if they knew. I guess we both know society thinks people like us are bonkers/old fashioned."

Swan | Interview: the couples who wait until marriage

Unusual, unfashionable, but also uncompromising: we interview couples who've put love above all and are saving themselves for marriage. What can we learn about intimacy from those whose love isn't...

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

🔧⚙️

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

But most men avoid approaching much younger women too. Humans want more than a maximally fertile mate as a life partner: we want someone with whom we share habits, friends, hobbies, and a frame of reference. And we're most likely to find those things with others of our own age.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Women in particular are happiest with partners of their own age, rather than with older men. This coincides with what we know about death rates: for men, having a younger spouse is linked to improved longevity...

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

The news isn't immediately brilliant: larger age gaps than average are associated with higher divorce rates – and the bigger the age gap, the higher the likelihood of divorce.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Save the date: we are delighted to announce that we’ll be closing our very first round of investment on 31st August! 🍾🥳 Get in touch if you’re late to the party but still want to join, otherwise— see you on the other side!

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

We care about making your life simpler. So it's now even easier to loop us in on your relationship status. Just flip a switch to let us know that you're off the market, and we'll stop matching you.

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

Cleopatra VII, the famously brilliant and beautiful ruler of Ptolemaic Egypt, had only one set of great-great-great-great grandparents. This makes her statistically more inbred than the Habsburg Charles II of Spain, who was severely physically disabled and died at 38.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

We're now on Facebook. Come and say hello!

Swan Match

Swan Match. 35 likes · 1 talking about this. Imagine the end of swiping. Imagine the end of small talk. Imagine if all you had to do for a brilliant date was turn up.

www.facebook.com

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Unfortunately, after that there's a drop big enough to wipe out the initial gain. Couples with age gaps of 4+ years experience lower relationship satisfaction as time goes by. And the bigger the age gap, the lower the satisfaction.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

75% of true crime fans are female. Why?

Swan | True crime, trauma, and TikTok: why women fall for serial killers

The internet lets us get closer to the architects of murder and violence than ever before, and curious relationships result. What drives women to fall in love with serial killers? And why are 75% of...

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Something new: we've answered our first question from a reader. Got one of your own? DM us or email ask @swan .date. All anonymous unless you ask otherwise. 💕

Swan | Ask Swan: my boyfriend hid his Viagra use from me

We answer a letter from April, whose boyfriend has been using Viagra and keeping it a secret. Our advice? It's time for an honest conversation about both of your emotional needs.

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

10 months

Our first mini-series on the blog is going to be about sex work. Let us know what you'd like to learn, & we'll look into it. Expect interviews, science, & sociology ☺️

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

The stats: - men over 40 are about 30% less likely to be able to create a pregnancy than men under 30, even controlling for the age of their partner - men over 45 take about 5 times longer to get their partners pregnant than men under 25 (also controlling for maternal age)

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

We’re delighted to announce that we have now closed our pre-seed funding round, enabling us to accelerate our growth & continue improving the service for our wonderful members. Here’s to the next chapter! 🐣

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Time for a game: please share the weirdest message you have ever received via a dating app (anonymised ofc)

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

We are delighted to announce that Swan has today appointed its CTO, who’ll be coming aboard as co-founder and overseeing all technical development. Sam is not on Twitter, but do join us in welcoming him to the team 😊

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Swan

@swandating

4 months

girl they did

cold 🥑

@coldhealing

4 months

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

One of the best things about growing is that it lets us build more of our own tools, instead of relying on pre-made software. Here's a preview of our revamped character assessment 🐣

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

@ellegist great tweet queen

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Going back to the OKCupid charts, it’s worth noting that while men are most attracted to very young women, the age gap in actual partner choice is much smaller. This is partly because women have choice. Young women like older men, but "older" by 3 years maximum, not 5 or more!

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

We love this piece from @j0ne_s_ –– why are conspiracy theories so common on dating apps? What is it that people are trying to signal?

i-D

A global platform for emerging talent, i-D celebrates fashion, culture, individuality and youth.

i-d.co

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Moving back to biology: it’s also easy to forget that just as women’s fertility decreases after ~35, male sperm quality falls significantly with age. This, too, increases the likelihood of birth defects and chromosomal abnormalities.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

This theory, crudely stated, fits with the evidence we have: women are consistently attracted to older men, and men to younger women. Several huge studies show that, and so do marital records: - -

Sex and Age Differences in Mate-Selection Preferences

Human Nature - For nearly 70 years, studies have shown large sex differences in human mate selection preferences. However, most of the studies were restricted to a limited set of mate...

link.springer.com

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Men over 40 are also 3 times as likely to experience severe erectile dysfunction, which doesn't make conception easier.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

the rumours are true. we now have a codebase

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

But there’s something that doesn’t make sense. If this effect were just "nature," just an outgrowth of evolutionary processes, we’d expect to see something similar in other human-like mammals. Yet when we look at chimpanzees, our closest living relatives, we see the opposite!

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Swan

@swandating

6 months

@CyrusYari @venturetwins @illscience @ellegist whoops! thanks Cyrus ☺️☺️

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

We love to hear from our customers! Here's what one had to say about her most recent match ⬇️

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

We're back! New year, new opportunities for romance 👀 and we've already made the first matches of 2023...

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

In developed countries, husbands are typically a couple of years older than wives. We set out to learn why. Take a look at the blog for the full picture, but this 🧵 will contain its main findings – plus some interesting asides we gathered along the way.

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Swan

@swandating

9 months

Here's the first instalment: what percentage of men pay for sex?

Swan | Sex work: the statistics

It’s one of the world's oldest professions, but surprisingly little data is available on its modern prevalence. Just how many men have paid for sex? And how are platforms like OnlyFans shaping the...

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Men live less long than women at the best of times, so advanced paternal age signals relatively low suitability as a prospective parent. Basically: it's no good having children with someone who won't be around to help raise them, or even contribute financially to their wellbeing.

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

the obvious option was right there

Jack Malvern

@jackmalvern

1 year

I think it's quite sweet that Harry and Meghan went to a party dressed as penguins because they thought they mate for life. With my party-pooping hat on, I can tell you it's a myth, and that for emperor penguins the break-up rate is about 80-90 per cent every year.

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

It certainly is! There’s been a lot of research about how well ideal partner traits map to actual partner choices, but a lot of it conflicts. Thanks for the tag 😊

Dan Elton

@moreisdifferent

1 year

@DegenRolf this seems like something @swandating may be interested in

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

We've written lots about what makes two people compatible. But once a couple is established, how can we predict whether they're likely to go the distance? Find out:

Swan | What makes a couple last?

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

Merry Christmas to all! 🎄🍾

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

"The single most powerful predictor of gender...is whether someone reports that they spend time trying to make other people comfortable." Are women really more altruistic than men? We've blogged: the real gender differences when it comes to romance

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

Let's begin. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, says the idiom. But scientists disagree. Many psychologists have argued that we tend to rate each other's attractiveness quite consistently. They claim that in practice, if someone's hot to you, they're probably hot to others.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

The older a female chimpanzee, the higher-status her partner is likely to be. 🙉 Maybe this is to be expected: young female chimps have no track record of successful childbirth, and indeed first-time chimpanzee mothers do have higher rates of neonatal mortality

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

There's actually a happiness boost that comes with having a younger spouse, and it lasts for up to 10 years:

The Marital Satisfaction of Differently Aged Couples

We investigate how the marital age gap affects the evolution of marital satisfaction over the duration of marriage using household panel data from Australia. We find that men tend to be more satisf...

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

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Swan

@swandating

11 months

Occasional reminder that we're always interested in your thoughts, takes, and questions – so if you have something you'd like us to research for a blog, or a question for our team, reply here or email ask @swan .date! ✨

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

But! Something else we know is those who have been in age-gap relationships previously are likely to be more open to them in the future. That's not what we'd expect if age-gap relationships were often a net negative for those involved.

Many Americans have engaged in age-gap dating

New Ipsos poll finds gender imbalances in what Americans find socially acceptable when dating

www.ipsos.com

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

The female chart, however, shows something the studies neglect: women are primarily interested in older men until the age of about 30 – at which point they prefer their partners to be either the same age or slightly younger than them.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

on tour

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

This might be part of the reason that big age gaps are more common in LGBTQ partnerships, in which biological parenthood involving both parties is less likely! But there's still a lot we don't know here:

What’s The Average Age Difference In A Couple?

Dear Mona, What is the average age difference among couples? My partner and I are 28 years apart, so I’m sure we’re an outlier, but by how much? And is it diffe…

fivethirtyeight.com

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Still, the average age of marriage in the UK/US hovers around 30; an age at which women prefer roughly same-age partners + men prefer younger partners. The compromise is that women marry men who are slightly older than them, and men marry women who are (only) slightly younger.

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Swan

@swandating

8 months

we love to see it

Dom

@D_Lukauskis

8 months

Sigma grindset confirmed @swandating

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Let's see how couples with big age gaps fare in the real world!

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

@j0ne_s_ Our co-founder, @ellegist , points out that when it comes to the apps, both men and women have strong incentives to act unusually:

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Swan

@swandating

7 months

hope this helps

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

@ellegist Or else

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

💌

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Swan

@swandating

3 years

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

First aside: you might expect that the marital age gap is bigger in countries with fewer protections for women, but did you know that it's also closely related to the value of child labour? Marrying younger = more children = more earners = more money.

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Swan

@swandating

6 months

This is what we like to hear! (And yes, they're going on a second date) ☺️

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

With all discussions about this, remember that women's preferences are typically thought to win out when it comes to love, dating, and (historically) mating. This is why 80-year-old men don't often get to marry 20-year-old women. But we'll probably blog on that in the future...

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Swan

@swandating

8 months

@bowtiedjconnor in fact we're looking at moving to this at the moment! 🦾

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

While women seek maximum resources for their children, men – the sex less involved in parenting – are optimising for sheer numbers of children, because the more chance to pass on their genes the better. Younger women can provide more children, so men prefer them.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

And very few of us *can't* point to one or more happy, successful relationships in our friends/family that also have big age gaps. Anecdotes aren't data, but they do indicate that the picture doesn't have to be bleak.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

We've blogged! Everyone knows that loneliness is bad for you, but how severe are the physical effects really? And is love a panacea?

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

So there are *lots* of good reasons to find someone who's your own age, or just a couple of years either side. But since when has love listened to reason?

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

Humans are social animals. When we go without skin contact, we become “touch-starved,” which is closely linked to increases in stress, anxiety, and depression.

Touch starvation is a consequence of COVID-19's physical distancing - TMC News

The lack of human touch during COVID-19's physical distancing could lead to mental and physical health issues.

www.tmc.edu

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

This is sad news on the face of it, and worth unpacking a bit. A quick look at the survey and its findings: 🧵

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

our CTO has been released

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

With chimps just as with humans, increased maternal age is associated with decreased fertility (when fertility is understood as “ability to deliver a surviving infant,” rather than just “ability to conceive a pregnancy”). So why don’t we see similar preferences in human males?

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Swan

@swandating

1 year

59% of American women say that religion is very important in their lives, compared to 47% of American men. Why?

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Swan

@swandating

4 months

Our members are why we do it.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

The male chart is predictable: no matter how old a man is, he prefers a female partner to be around 21 years old. This is right before the beginning of a woman’s most fertile years, which last roughly from one’s mid-20s to one’s mid-30s (more on this later)

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Expect some minor downtime today as we move our website over to a different provider –– it's getting a gorgeous new look and we're very excited!

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

There’s also the fact that men seeking much younger partners are generally viewed as predatory: they’re selecting for women with less life experience, and probably the high impulsivity/comparatively poor decision-making skills that we all have before about 25.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

Casual sex: how is it for you? We dive into the science of no-strings sex. Discover whether it's boosting or harming your health:

Swan | Casual sex: how is it for you?

Casual sex is normal and even expected. It's good for our body and mind – if you do it properly. But what are the risks, and who's most vulnerable to its downsides? What makes it the right choice for...

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

From cougars to chimpanzees: Swan went on safari to find the data on age-gap relationships

Swan | The facts about age gap relationships

The average husband is 2-3 years older than the average wife. But what happens when that small gap expands? How likely are couples with big age gaps to succeed? And is there a biological basis for...

www.swan.date

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Swan

@swandating

1 month

We had to use a smaller font for this testimonial, but we wanted to fit it all in! Making you happy makes us happy.

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

@JackNathanMoran @redoatz @ellegist we’re on it

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Swan

@swandating

2 years

New from the blog: what makes someone easy to match?

Swan | What makes someone easy to match?

When it comes to matchmaking, there are a lot of misconceptions. So we address a few, and answer some common questions. What is it that makes someone easy to match? And how can you make yourself more...

www.swan.date

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