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Mike Wozniak Profile
Mike Wozniak

@mrmikewozniak

90,041
Followers
1,716
Following
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Media
1,761
Statuses

Showbusinessman. The Malcolm Durridge behind @StElwicksNews . One bean of @beansaladpod .

Joined March 2012
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
My arse wishes to say thank you for the messages of support at this difficult time. It will not be receiving visitors while it adjusts to recent developments although it will accept ointments.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Had to shake a couple of paparazzi out of my trousers this morning.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
There's been a development:
@taskmaster
Taskmaster
1 year
HUGE news time. @Rose_Matafeo and @mrmikewozniak will be your Taskmaster and Assistant for JUNIOR TASKMASTER. Coming soon to Channel 4. #JuniorTaskmaster
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
#Taskmaster starts tonight I don't mind telling you.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Precious.
@KittieHill
✨️ Kittie Hill ✨️
3 years
Did I really spend my day off sewing fanart to @mrmikewozniak 's piles? Yes. Yes I did. #taskmaster
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
Impenetrable focus despite hurty finger. For more baking heroics featuring @DeborahMeaden @1Judilove and @jayblades_ get yourself to C4 this Sunday at 7.40pm. Also (crucially) this is for charity so please donate here: #GBBO
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Of course my show business training is telling me to play it cool and stay frosty but I'm a mighty, mighty big fan of this thing so I'll admit my little heart is beating like a hummingbird's.
@taskmaster
Taskmaster
3 years
An early Christmas present from the Taskmaster - the series 11 line up! Charlotte Ritchie ( @Charitchie ), @JamaliMaddix , @LeeMack , @MrMikeWozniak and @Sarah_Kendall are next up to face the Taskmaster @GDavies and his assistant Little @AlexHorne . Coming to @Channel4 in 2021.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 month
Podcast, glorious podcast...
@OffMenuOfficial
Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster
1 month
🍰 EPISODE 241 OUT NOW 🍰 with… MIKE WOZNIAK Live in London Listen, review, subscribe 🍽️ Apple: 🍽️ Spotify:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
Awful news about Gareth Richards. An utterly delightful man, a wonderful comedian. The world is that much sadder without him in it.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Top drawer!
@forest1411
sara ╭(°A°`)╮ 🍉
3 years
so my phone was glitching... So here it is again! My cover of Mike Wozniaks' 1) moustache, and 2) prize task from ep 1 ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
@chobbs_x This looks more like me than I do.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
@bethany1marie @taskmaster Ain’t no shame in a spot of wonk.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
@GuzKhanOfficial @taskmaster Never say never. Let’s recline into the future…
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
For the Forsyth!
@taskmaster
Taskmaster
2 years
In last ditch attempt to entice you into voting for #Taskmaster for the Bruce Forsyth Award at the NTAs, here are some outtakes from Alex and Greg's trip to the seaside! Last chance to vote here:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 months
Had to buy special shoes for this. High adventure with @TheOlaLabib . Tonight on Dave at 8pm.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Spilled the beans to @joshwiddicombe and @robbeckettcomic
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
🇺🇦Exeter types: vigil for Ukraine happening today at 11am in Bedford Square (Princesshay) 🇺🇦
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Did a bit of a thing with the good ol' @thepincomedy
@thepincomedy
The Pin
3 years
how to level up your home work-station
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
A TOUR! Bunch of tickets for "Zusa" available right here thanks to @LittleWander - Bunch more available soon. Artwork by the excellent Madison Coby.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Good morning! Just so you know a tour is in the offing. Details (so far) here and most tickets on sale a week today. More to come. I'll keep you in the loop if you fancy.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Gold-Standard, Top-Drawer, Apex Badass.
@josierones
Rosie Jones
3 years
The sad thing is that I’m not surprised at the ableist abuse I’ve received tonight regarding my appearance on Question Time. It’s indicative of the country we live in right now. I will keep on speaking up, in my wonderful voice, for what I believe in.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
BEANS!
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
This week we roll with listener Fiona's suggestion of "Bags". Do you know Fiona? Does she always suggest bags in any situation? Let us know. Meanwhile, ziplock yourself into this: with @HenryPaker @benpartridge and @mrmikewozniak
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
9 months
This is a tremendous development.
@robertpopper
Robert Popper
9 months
LOOK AROUND YOU is finally on iplayer. Thanks iplayer. Thiplayer
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
28 days
Sporting debut:
@AlexHorne
Alex Horne
28 days
Not long till my comedy footy game @cheshamutdfc Mathew Baynton, Mike Wozniak, Russell Howard, Sam Campbell, Maisie Adam, Nish Kumar, Tim Key, Hugh Dennis, Doc Brown, Iain Stirling, Mark Watson & more + actual footballers & brand new stupid rules. May 11
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
Team Sheffield! I’ve been asked if the gig is on tonight. In short - it is. PS That doesn’t mean attendance is compulsory. Wouldn’t want anyone doing themselves a mischief trying to battle through the Arctic blast and there’s back to back NCIS on 5USA at the same time.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
6 months
Hullo! A mini tour extension of Zusa is afoot early next year. Tickets for London (where we're recording it for a little audio album doncha know oooooh!) available today at High Noon, tickets for Newbury available tomorrow, all the rest available NOW!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
Hello! I’ve been asked by a few people where you can apply for Junior Taskmaster and it’s right here and it’s open NOW!
@taskmaster
Taskmaster
1 year
ATTENTION, SMALL PEOPLE! Applications are now open for Junior Taskmaster, coming soon to Channel 4! If you know a highly entertaining, quick-thinking, rule-bending 9-11 year old, head to . T&Cs apply. #JuniorTaskmaster
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
If you find you generally "prefer their early stuff" then there's no better time to get into THIS:
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
Heeeeere we go! Episode one is here. The beans - @mrmikewozniak @henrypaker and @benpartridge - are straight out of the gates discussing the thorny issue of posters.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Rest assured all moustache strings will be professionally tuned in readiness.
@AlexHorne
Alex Horne
3 years
The @hornesection livestream podcast is THIS FRIDAY 8PM - tickets here: It WILL of course feature something special from long time collaborator, the Task Consultant. And I can confirm it will also feature Mr Moustache himself, MIKE WOZNIAK. Yes please!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Would you believe it there's a brand new episode of @StElwicksNews out and it's only gone and got @Charitchie in it playing Christine Fingle of all people.
@StElwicksNews
St Elwick's Neighbourhood Association Newsletter
3 years
Right then. New edition of the Newsletter Podcast available today. Includes synopses of the lost Feb and March editions so let that be an end to it.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Do you have a sleep bastard in your life? We Three Beans certainly do. Find out more right here:
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
Nose to tail podcasting this week as we start with Ben's arse (the "tail") and chat our way up to the theme of SLEEP (the "nose" acting as an ambassador for the head which you need to get to sleep). With @benpartridge @mrmikewozniak and @HenryPaker as per.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Last bean of the series. Second bean harvest coming soon. Ta very much for listening (if you've been listening).
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
The Beans are about to embark on a brief and entirely unearned pause but before we do we wrap our seed coats round the crucial topic of "Purple". Season 2 release date to be conveyed to you by a hand-engraved bean which will be concealed in your lunch.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
The world's premier Magnum reviewer returns:
@benpartridge
Benjamin Partridge
2 years
I've reviewed the Double Raspberry Magnum, just for you 👇👇👇
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
22 days
This is very excellent and genuinely, actually, really contains a fully fledged, unabridged, nose to tail Ted Danson.
@beefanddairy
Beef & Dairy Network
23 days
New episode out today! Featuring the actor @TedDanson 🤯, the actor @mrdavidreed 🦷, the actor @sueharrison123 🎧, the actor @NatashaHodgson 🤪, the actor @markturetsky 🎙️ and the actor @LinneaSage 🐭. The loaves must be made.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
6 months
Yes please thank you.
@springleafpod
Springleaf Podcast
6 months
Happy Springleaf Day, everyone! Acast: Apple: Spotify: #JamesAcaster #Acaster #SayYourPrayers
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
CRUCIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: Today you must bring your own pencil to listen to the new episode of @beansaladpod . #Lizards #BYOP
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 month
Pam has made it clear to me that she regards this as PROPER art.
@verpabunny
Kelly Vivanco
1 month
@beansaladpod Cold pressed show notes:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
4 months
Nice times with a coupla super swell booksters...
@plosiveprods
Plosive
4 months
New episode of... 📖 Weirdos Book Club 📖 🔮 Beyond Black by Hilary Mantel 🔮 with the incredible Mike Wozniak! Apple: Spotify: @sarapascoe @ladycariad @mrmikewozniak
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
If you're after a podcast experience in which the crucial topics of the day are tackled with rigour, precision and, yes, I'll say it, courage, then don't look no further than @beansaladpod with @HenryPaker , @benpartridge and me. This week's thorny one: Biscuits.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
This week's topic is "Biscuits"! How do you listen to yours?
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
Have a lovely old time doing @CuddleClubPod with that @LouSanders doncha know...
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
Chock's away! The Zusa tour is afoot and shall be gambolling about @sohotheatre this week and next. Last few tickets right here if you're in range and in the mood.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Malcolm puts up his dukes. More @StElwicksNews coming later this month by the looks of things.
@StElwicksNews
St Elwick's Neighbourhood Association Newsletter
3 years
I thought releasing the June edition in printed form would have been cause for celebration but instead I have been inundated with snippiness. I do this in my own time you know. All complaints addressed en masse herein:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
If you're lucky enough to have a VHS recorder and can tape Eurovision and you're lucky enough to have your own private train then you might fancy grabbing one of the very last tickets for Zusa in Worthing tomorrow night. All about the ifs.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
The further adventures of Malcolm Durridge:
@StElwicksNews
St Elwick's Neighbourhood Association Newsletter
3 years
Latest edition below. Any complaints re Neighbourhood Association Committee meeting minutes to Gary van Sned please.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
11 months
This is NOT a cult.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
11 months
Are you ready for Beanmageddon?
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
TONIGHT! THIS:
@UKTVPress
UKTV Press Office
1 year
"Terrific" - @ST_Culture "Hilarious" - @mailplus "Funny, excellently observed" - @SunTVMagazine "Gag-filled" - @guardianTV "Brilliantly funny" - @MirrorTV #WeAreNotAlone lands tonight! 9pm on @davechannel
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Spring Beans!
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
The Beans are back! Experience them as you never have before! (eg by wearing an old jumper you'd forgotten you owned while listening. The show itself is much the same).
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
10 months
The nation's tastemaker returns:
@benpartridge
Benjamin Partridge
10 months
Wondering what the new Double Sunlover Magnum is like? Luckily I've reviewed it for you. 👇 📷
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
5 months
Had a lush old time making this sinister treat of a @MeatBingo film and wadya know he’s made it available here and now! Also features Will Adamsdale who I would tag here but he’s the social media equivalent of the snow leopard. Slice of @MooseAllain too for the keen-eyed.
@MeatBingo
Meat Bingo
5 months
Here’s the new film Sleepyman! Stars @mrmikewozniak & #WillAdamsdale , based on the short story by @quantick #SleepymanFilm
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
8 years
Jeremy Hunt dreams of one person’s cancer being another’s business opportunity. Don’t let him wreck the NHS. Support #JuniorDoctorsStrike
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
New @beansaladpod with @benpartridge , @HenryPaker and, your friend and mine, asteroids.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
Follow the link for a comprehensive discussion of "Spaceman's Confetti" aka ASTEROIDS:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Thoroughly loved getting neolithic with this lot.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
8 months
Here's beans in your eye!
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
8 months
Life is not all beer and skittles. It is also beans:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Get deep into flags:
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
There's never been a better time to talk about flags.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Great big episode this time. Features the return of grizzled veteran of St Elwick's @danielrigby as well as shop-fresh newsletter debutant @joshwiddicombe .
@StElwicksNews
St Elwick's Neighbourhood Association Newsletter
3 years
July edition herein. Includes the long awaited return of our local history segment with Hilary Geisler and an extremely exciting Local Lives with would-be record-breaker Martin Cudlipp.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Content warning: contains elements of spooooooooooooookiness.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
Hoist the poop deck and clench the futtocks! This week's bilge is all (ish) about the RMS Titanic. It is also the last episode of the series but fear not - we shall rise again like an old lady's brooch.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
This is still very much knocking about if you fancy wrapping your ears round it.
@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Hard-hitting high-octane consumer affairs journalism tonight at 6.30pm on @BBCRadio4 with the likes of @HenryPaker @benpartridge @SimonMAlikesyou @ladycariad @PaulChahidi and @shivani_alice all in it up to their necks:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
10 months
Last of the season. We'll be back, refreshed and at optimum lukewarm in September.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
10 months
Audio-Oats keep those podcast hunger pangs away for longer.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
6 months
Gigs for gig-goers! "Zusa" mini extension tour thing with recordings at the end for an audio album happening in Feb/March so as you know. Dates below. All tickets available right here (via a click or two):
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
The day of the bean is upon us.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
Get edified bean-style with this definitive episode on "Museums".
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Today you can trade your 12 drummers drumming for... three beans!
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
OK, 2022. Let's Elevator!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Once again the beans pounce upon the zeitgeist with... goblins.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
5 months
Look out Christmas Hit Parade. There’s a new kid in town.
@benpartridge
Benjamin Partridge
5 months
It was only upon filming myself struggling through a Christmas carol that I realised that I pull a face like Santana ripping a gut-busting solo when I play the banjo.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Up bean-o-scope!
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
"Punish him like a bean!" is an old maritime saying we don't explore in this brand new episode but we do grasp our flightless legs around submarines. Chocks away! @HenryPaker @benpartridge @mrmikewozniak #ThreeBeanSaladPod
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Get informed:
@benpartridge
Benjamin Partridge
2 years
New ice cream review: Häagen-Dazs Mango and Raspberry. 🍦🍦🍦
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Bean propaganda:
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
Got someone in your life who isn't riding The Bean Train? Why not ram this down their throat:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 month
Miscellaneous content:
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
1 month
Lukewarm chat, très bien chat.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
11 months
Vital content:
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
11 months
3.2.1. BEAN!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
The Beans go live right here: NB this for physical tickets for physical seats in a physical room with physical beans. Hoping to be able to provide good news about livestream tickets soon...
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Merry Beans to one and all!
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
Christmas Beans! (Zombies really):
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
7 months
Three Bean Salad: the little black dress of podcasts.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
7 months
Fellas that were in the mood...
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 month
An essential element for any ear buffet.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
1 month
Olives: the beans of the trees.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Best one so far I reckon.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
It’s… Pam!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 months
The beans get going...
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 months
The Chuck Norris of podcasts:
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
HONCE!
@verpabunny
Kelly Vivanco
3 years
@beansaladpod Thanks for the healthy live stream
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
Good morning! (directing this at everyone). Extra dates added for Zusa @sohotheatre right here: (this for anyone in, near or swinging by London in January).
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Don't worry. We managed to squeeze Phil Collins in pre-glitch.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
To celebrate Glitch Week, today's "Musical Instruments" episode features an unparalleled technical catastrophe. Not for the faint hearted.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
New beans, straight off the vine.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
No bean is an island.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
The beans come in from the cold.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
BEWARE! The walls have beans.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Malcolm goes pirate.
@StElwicksNews
St Elwick's Neighbourhood Association Newsletter
2 years
I shouldn't be on here so I'll keep it quick. Events beyond my control have forced my hand which is why there is a PIRATE PODCAST TRANSMISSION right here. Needs must. Might even be a world first but as world firsts go it's a low one.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
7 months
The ancient Greeks had one Homer. You have three beans.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
7 months
What's in YOUR horse?
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Love beans? Here come the Love Beans.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
Turn the lights down low and listen to our new episode which is all about ROMANCE. 🍾🥂🌃😘🔥🌹💌❤️‍🔥💋
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Finally.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
This week the beans consider that which separates man from beast: Buffets.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
9 months
Once again @benpartridge gives us the skinny from the chocolate-coated front-line.
@benpartridge
Benjamin Partridge
9 months
Wondering what the new Double Starchaser Magnum is like? Luckily I've reviewed it for you.👇🏼 (featuring @itsdanthomas )
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
1 year
Play up, Pompey!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Real gutter stuff this week.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
Brace yourselves. Slippers.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
5 months
Let's Bean our way out of 2023 shall we?
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
5 months
Let's Bean it!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
MAGIC!
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
Take a peek up the wizard's sleeve today and there you shall find... beans.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Do you Hat?
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
This week we cover the shoes of the head: hats!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
@freshcrewlabel @taskmaster @AlexHorne This is exactly how I remember it.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
4 months
A crab is its own castle.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
4 months
Hear ye!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
3 years
Let's bean!
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
3 years
Who is the greatest living artist of our time? (is just one of the questions we don't go anywhere near in the latest episode which is all about portraiture):
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
5 months
The beans talk.
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
5 months
Have you ever pushed an old woman into her oven? Or has your grandmother been eaten by a wolf? Then this is the podcast for you!
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
2 years
Freewheelin' beans:
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
2 years
Butter your perineum, saddle up and put on your clickety-clackety shoes: it's time for bicycles.
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@mrmikewozniak
Mike Wozniak
8 months
Citrus fresh content:
@beansaladpod
Three Bean Salad Podcast
8 months
What do YOU rhyme with?
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