jordan @jdan Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@OH_mes2

@fionaharvey

@Muneeblive88

@rocioseguirviva

@Redbionova

@Guskunradaa

@MRaceBBC

@MichelleRayCSP

@RiverMakes

@MackAP_

@MicrosoftEgypt

@creamy976

@openparlyid

@stevoem

@hensoncompany

@hidabreak

@ignmontalvo

@kopididid

@ScorpIrina1

@ne_ne_cchi630

@Japanmijic2024

@PijatGays

@georgepenisbush

@freydoh

@itskelseybutler

@rausnaga

@CastelGallipoli

@dagangancees

@sumaho_pachislo

@dinosaurs1969

@JuanASotoG

@badthemusicblog

@dark_sided

@Mimul20

@didut

@punkcatinspace

jordan

@jdan

25 days

back at my desk after staring at the eclipse for 13 minutes

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

This was me, my 6.5-year stint at Twitter comes to an end today. Proud of the work we did and have full confidence the three or four people left will be able to honor Elon’s requests to artificially inflate his view counts (and view counts for advertisers). Not me though 🫡

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

From a friend still employed at Twitter. Things are a little hectic!

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

Block all Twitter Blue subscribers. It's easy, it takes no effort at all, it's a source of great pain for twitter's algorithm, and it feels good.

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

I run social media advertising for Apple and we slowed down our Q4 ad spend because (a) lack of engagement, mostly bot impressions (b) lack of trust in twitter ldrship

Elon Musk

@elonmusk

1 year

Apple has mostly stopped advertising on Twitter. Do they hate free speech in America?

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

I'm an aspiring graphic designer trying to reimagine what we can do with text. Here are some of my latest rebranding projects. 🙏 RT for reach?

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@jdan

1 year

I’m on the Data Science team at twitter and can say with certainty this graph has a *ton* of flaws in its calculation

Elon Musk

@elonmusk

1 year

Recent trend is promising

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

Gave the LinkedIn a fresh coat of paint

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

Haha wow Brett is that really you? From Econ 201? Do you still wear your bicycle helmet to class you absolute dork

Brett Seaton

@BrettSeaton0

1 year

@jdan Dude either slack @elonmusk directly or actually provide a useful thread. At this point, you deserve the 🗑️.

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

Absolutely wild insider info from a friend who works at facebook (name and photo hidden obviously)

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

@dotmops You should buy watches or something dude a gold check is legitimately just embarrassing you got scammed lol

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

checking the timeline to see someone I admire accept a role at facebook in 2021

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

Sigh, was only a matter of time

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jordan

@jdan

4 years

Called it.

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

David Sacks

@DavidSacks

1 year

Nine Biden’s have received payments from foreign countries but the real scandal is charging celebrities $8/month.

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

@TheQuartering Serious question do you still piss on the floor of your basement like a puppy

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

GitHub Copilot still has a couple kinks but I like what I see so far!

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

Your yearly reminder that "o_o" is a valid identifier in JavaScript so you can make lil guys watch over your code

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

Breaking my silence: I am the inventor of GitHub Copilot I pitched the idea for an "AI programmer" in early 2020 named "Pilot." I built and fine-tuned the models (myself), and made the website (just me, only me), in fact for the first month I manually wrote the responses (me)

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

@Timcast @TaylorLorenz Scanning twitter bios is doxxing?

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

@thechrismorris It means I see less horrible people

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jordan

@jdan

6 months

Have Mac OSX Aqua's button gradients ever been released/reverse engineered? Feels close but I need perfect.

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jordan

@jdan

5 months

She did it

Nicki Minaj

@NICKIMINAJ

5 months

The fact that y’all have no idea what’s about to happen

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

Why do people struggle with merge conflicts? It shows you a conflict between my code and some coworker’s so obviously I’m just gonna click “use my code” every time

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jordan

@jdan

4 months

Paul Biggar is on the right side of history

I can't sleep

I can't sleep. I'm lying in bed every night, and images of Gaza are running through my head. Fathers holding their babies, dead, caked in dust. Bombs dropped on homes [1], on hospitals [2], on...

blog.paulbiggar.com

Paul Biggar 🇵🇸🇮🇪

@paulbiggar

4 months

Actions have consequences, and that's ok

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

Let’s give Elon and @DavidSacks a break tonight, folks. Piece of advice: startups are full of ups and downs, it’s all part of the cost of building fast and in public 💪 Tonight was a historic event! I am the absolute stupidest person alive. When my doorbell rings I start barking

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

Thanks so much to all of you for trying out JavaScript! Unfortunately I’ve made the difficult decision to scale back operations and shut down the project effective immediately. You’ll still have 48 hours to migrate your websites. It’s been an honor serving all of you! 🙏

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

@atommorgan Looking good dude! Glad to see you don’t tweet about how women shouldn’t program or whatever anymore

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jordan

@jdan

6 months

Welp, looks like OpenAI just killed my startup (phone app that recommends different mustards)

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

@cocotierr_ Sure they can! And I’m free to block them no?

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

I’m not just building an app, I’m building a movement Narrator: He’s just building an app

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jordan

@jdan

4 years

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jordan

@jdan

7 months

Is it fair to say “ls” is dead? No commits in like 15 years… getting a little worried about depending on it in my software. What are the maintainers doing?

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

RIP Alan Turing you would have loved to see the result of your work being people arguing over reduce vs for-loops

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

nit: hey could you rewrite this entire pull request

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

ProductGuy69: Dev teams don’t ship product. Products ship dev teams. 💬 820 ♻️ 8.9K ♥️ 21K Me: what

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

Software estimates

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jordan

@jdan

10 months

Masterclass in - and I cannot stress this enough - illegal collusion

Anand Chandrasekaran

@anandc

10 months

Masterclass in CEO communication -

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

@Timcast @TaylorLorenz Tim Pool, Famous Doxx Supporter lmao

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

I worked on the team that built Internet Explorer 4.0 Fun fact: The CSS property `margin` was intended to be used to comment your code (i.e. "margin comment") and we never expected anyone to use it to position elements. Please stop doing this, that's not what it's for.

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

Direct link to their wonderful extension so you don’t have to open my website:

Blue Blocker

Blocks all Twitter Blue verified users on twitter.com

chromewebstore.google.com

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

Okay it's been 6 years: we should probably have a long discussion on how Prettier is the most successful JavaScript project of the last decade It knows exactly what it is and isn't, never breaks on me, is incredibly missed when it's not there. Unproblematic king 👑

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@jdan

2 years

@Timcast @TaylorLorenz Oh nice you asked him about revealing the identity of Roy Moore’s accuser? What timestamp should I go to to see that?

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@jdan

2 years

@Timcast @TaylorLorenz I keep watching the episode but I can’t find any mention of you talking about doxxing or even disagreeing with Jack Posobiec. Oh well! Was hoping you’d also mention your “Hahahah” reaction about doxxing in the past since you’re so concerned with it.

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@jdan

11 months

And here's their extension on Firefox

Blue Blocker – Get this Extension for 🦊 Firefox (en-US)

Download Blue Blocker for Firefox. Blocks all Twitter Blue verified users on twitter.com

addons.mozilla.org

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jordan

@jdan

10 months

Not to brag but the silly “tech predictions” note I wrote in 2009 has aged really really well

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

@noxidleinahtan High performers have special privileges

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@jdan

3 years

dhh’s phone be like

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

🤔 Did You Know? 💡 🧵 #TypeScript has a new "IF" syntax for shorter, more composable code ‼️ RT and tag three of your friends who could use this 👇 #Code #Ebooks #WebDev

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

I was so committed to the bit that I tried _three times_ to get Office 2007 installed on my windows XP vm and 100% gave it a virus So I ended up on (great work @mikemcchillin please use 98.css though)

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@jdan

2 months

Me [having absolutely no capacity or capability to solve your problem]: Let’s start from the beginning, what are you trying to do exactly?

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jordan

@jdan

10 months

Trying to be more positive on here but my god, what losers. Jesus *Christ*

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

If any of you out there feel a little imposter syndrome today - I'm a senior level engineer and everything I do is on time and perfect and I don't write any bugs. With enough hard work, you too can be like me 💪

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jordan

@jdan

8 months

If I were a stakeholder I would simply be aligned

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@jdan

1 year

I have decided to make my own twitter. You will have to use the curl command to post, and only I will be able to read them. I will post updates periodically. Thank you.

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@jdan

1 year

@RightWingCope but the fact that it could have says a lot about society today

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

In late 1995 I created and released the “JavaScript” programming language. However, the world has changed a lot and JavaScript has failed to keep up with it. I will be deleting the JavaScript language THIS FRIDAY unless someone speaks up. Reply below to save JavaScript 👇

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@jdan

3 years

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@jdan

2 months

It’s crazy to me how we throw parades for first responders but those of us who align stakeholders have to do so in silence

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@jdan

1 year

@michelletandler Hi Michelle! What the fuck is wrong with you

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jordan

@jdan

4 years

Web development became really fun after I learned that browsers send nothing but a method (GET, POST, etc) a resource (/gib/me/file), some headers and maybe a body - and everything that follows is a social construct with the goal of making the result as unsurprising as possible

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

I started carrying a pack of cigarettes everywhere I go. Why? Last year on my way to a job interview a homeless man asked me “got a smoke?” I ignored him. During the interview the CEO walked in. I looked up and saw it was the homeless man. “Next!” he shouted. Lesson learned.

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@jdan

9 months

@trunarla “Buncha nerd shit happens then we get html and the browser can read it and turn it into drawRect() commands”

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

@charliermarsh Thanks! Big fans of ruff here. Feel free to put the logo on your GitHub

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@jdan

2 years

My hot take is that computing should be *more* centralized, not less. Forget offline, wireless, or the cloud - you should go to your town’s computer to do the things you need to do, then go home.

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

Felt bored did a new homepage

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jordan

@jdan

7 months

?

unusual_whales

@unusual_whales

7 months

Shopify, $SHOP, CEO Tobi Lütke discourages employees from having side hustles, saying Shopify requires 'unshared attention,' per BI.

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jordan

@jdan

4 years

today's my last day at @stripe after almost 3 years of learning what a computer is. i'm leaving a cool job and you should work here off to spend a few months working on side projects and catching up on textbooks, but if you get sued and need an expensive a11y fixer let me know

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jordan

@jdan

7 months

What stage of capitalism is this

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jordan

@jdan

2 years

Hello, Twitter! Creator of JavaScript here - you should NOT be using this for websites that's not what I made it for

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jordan

@jdan

11 months

Hurts to see others taking credit for my work today. Hoping folks can corroborate my story and set the record straight 👍

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

#JavaScript protip - Use #variables to store common values and shorten your functions. Here's an example with #ReactJS 👇

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@jdan

3 years

Start with the fundamentals

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

I cannot stress enough that you do not have to work for this dork, and you can get that money elsewhere. “Yeah but all of tech—“ stop. Literally no.

jstrauss

@jstrauss

3 years

Cool cool.

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@jdan

1 year

VCs who spent the last three years claiming tech workers are lazy, entitled, and overpaid suddenly switching gears to say their desire for govt intervention is about saving jobs is a very funny wake-up call that they’ll completely forget about after the next payroll checks clear

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jordan

@jdan

10 months

. @DavidSacks hey man you alright? text me if you need anything, thinking of you during this difficult time

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@jdan

2 years

It's been fun to build this and have lots of stories to tell people at parties about how when you select backwards in mobile webkit from a contenteditable=true to a contenteditable=false the selection collapses and there is no workaround, but I haven't been invited back to many

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@jdan

11 months

@MNateShyamalan Intentionally damaging the reputation of a website I bought to own the libs 🤣🤣🤣

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@jdan

2 years

Instead of telling candidates to "build this component from scratch" I'm going to give them a real-world exercise: you have a component with 23 props that almost works but you want to add a 24th and the person who wrote 75% of its code is on PTO. How do you hide it from them?

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@jdan

3 years

ProductGuy2233: Don't make products that people will remember, make products that people will forget. 💬 1.2K ♻️ 30K ♥️ 62K Me: what

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@jdan

11 months

Personally I think it shows just how #resilient Elon and David are. No other company is doing what they're doing at this speed 🚀 Last month I spent my entire social security check on iTunes gift cards to send to a woman I thought was Canadian singer-songwriter Shania Twain

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jordan

@jdan

4 years

There are probably better ways to spend my energy but I'm so tired of white supremacists being laundered up back into tech after we show them the door. I want @webdevMason to explain what Mencius Moldbug *possibly* has to offer to any conversation.

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@jdan

1 year

I will go out on my own terms: Posting

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jordan

@jdan

6 months

pretty insane DM I just got from a friend still there

Kylie Robison

@kyliebytes

6 months

Scoop: X, formerly Twitter, is now valued at $19 billion, based on the firm's employee equity compensation plan. The privately-held company, owned by Elon Musk, is giving employees RSUs at a share price $45 according to a source familiar with the matter.

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@jdan

3 years

Today's #DevAdvice : Stop being clever with reduce! Unlock the rest of this file for $99 (limited price for the first 100 customers until next week)

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@jdan

11 months

@OestaOne No I’m not going to sit. Also your profile picture is clearly a fisheye lens to fake a curve nice try though

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@jdan

2 years

First one in today 😎

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@jdan

3 years

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jordan

@jdan

1 year

Friendly reminder that String.prototype.repeat exists! Clean up your old code today 👍

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@jdan

1 year

One of my dumbest opinions is that a regular pizza party is a better investment for your development team than using a type system

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jordan

@jdan

8 months

#AppleEvent #TeamSamsung

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@jdan

3 years

I simultaneously believe that type systems solve an entire class of software bugs with ~little cost, and that type systems are a testament to man's arrogance and an attempt to organize a world more complicated than we can possibly imagine

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@jdan

2 years

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@jdan

5 months

If you believe terrorists are shoving 4 loose bullets into random corners of an incubator and not the far more likely scenario that some soldiers planted a package that they can then unbox on camera this stops becoming a question of morality and instead one of basic intelligence

COGAT

@cogatonline

5 months

WATCH: Hamas hid weapons in incubators in the NICU, incubators that were supposed to be used to treat premature babies. These weapons were found following the confession of hospital workers. The Kamal Adwan hospital was used by Hamas as a command center.

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@jdan

1 year

@ConceptualJames lmao

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jordan

@jdan

3 years

Instead of “I broke production” say “A me-involved production incident occurred”

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@jdan

3 years

@lazoxco no I lost all my friends who work at FB for ripping on them nonstop

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@jdan

1 year

Is this the future of note-taking? No Are notes supposed to be organized into a tree? No Did I finally learn what this whole "tailwind" thing is? Yes Is EventSource a cool browser API? Yes Was it fun to build? Yes

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@jdan

3 years

The acquifired contrarian idiot has been dunked on enough times so I don’t have anything to add, other than: stop thinking you’re not smart enough to work at stripe

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