It's one year today since my husband Andy died. (Yes it's been a year, and no, it hasn't flown. Not for me, anyway.) Big thanks to
@godisinthetv
for letting me write this little piece about us x
Hello everyone, I’m very sad to share the news that Andy my husband of 24yrs, died this weekend after a long illness. Love to those who made our lives more bearable whilst he was poorly & thanks to the kind souls who made it possible for him to die at home, it meant so much x
Why does Nicholas Witchell think he's got the right to know the Queen's business. She's just lost her husband. Being widowed makes people physically and mentally poorly. Leave her alone, you absolute lemon.
When we got married we invested our money in buying a house, so our wedding rings were budget ones. People have unfortunately made (rude, cruel) comments about them over the years; this week I got both combined to make a new ring, shiny & bigger but still ours and I love it x
When I went on a date with a lad called Andy 26 yrs ago today, I didn't imagine we'd be married 6 months 7 days later. We all do crazy stuff when young but that was a good idea, I think. He can't join me this year but I'm still celebrating that first date, just differently x
@dank_ackroyd
A random bloke used to tweet me poems made of Elvis song titles strung together nothing more, and got angry when I didn't respond with thanks or encouragement.
It’s my silver wedding anniversary today. Or would be, if Andy's body hadn’t let him down. I’m celebrating in my own way as we’d have made the 25 years for sure - & the rest. Thanks/lots of love to those who helped make an otherwise bumpy December/ Xmas/NY/today easier for me x
Last month I wrote a piece of creative non-fiction about existing, living as a widow during the pandemic - it's a bit melancholic but ultimately concludes comfortably enough. I'm pleased to receive confirmation today it's to be published in a 📚 book 📖 published in September❤️
I went to New Brighton with
@thecoralband
. We sat a stone's throw from the sea, and talked about Del Shannon - and the new album Coral Island. Pick up a copy of
@BidoLito
, or read all about it online 👇👇👇
@fesshole
When Arthur Miller brought Marilyn Monroe to meet his parents, when she went to the loo she ran the tap so no one would hear. The day after, Miller asked his father what he thought of her. "Lovely girl, pisses like a horse"
Hey, Primark snarks. Maybe people are skint and need cheap clothes. Maybe women want to be with other women, be somewhere familiar, normal and enjoy cheery fabrics while they're at it. Good for you if you can do online shopping and it meets all your needs, mate. Good for you.
Two years today since Andy died. Spending the day reflecting on our life together, and how my own life has changed so much since last August's anniversary ❤
Happy International Men's Day to the good men out there, who support women & girls, and our rights. All men like pie, so this is for you. Dive in. To bad men who hurt or hate us, show us their body parts without consent, all that sort of thing - no pie for you. Make/buy your own.
Four years today. Love this rare pic of Andy tending our garden, in the traditional gardening attire of chiffon paisley shirt, good jeans and best watch. I'm spending the day reflecting on what and who is important x
Thank you to all who sent/posted/emailed kind messages about losing Andy. It is making a very difficult time easier to struggle through. I might not reply to each one, but rest assured I read and appreciate them all x
Tonight I'm thinking of this quite beautiful portrait of Mark E Smith, by Michael Bracewell and John Wilde, on display at Liverpool's Serving Library last winter x
Thanks
@BBC6Music
Festival for the opportunities and access this weekend in Cardiff, the positive vibes (sic) summed up in this image from Sunday by
@bevunit
for
@godisinthetv
- myself and Gruff Rhys, mid-interview flow.
My name is May. I have just licked a tuna and cheese toastie I knew full well was not made for me. I am 17yo and a bit soft in the head but knew what I did was very wrong even as I was doing it.
#toastiegate
John Lennon loved tea. My husband loved a good cuppa tea, and he loved John Lennon. Happy birthday, John. Wherever you are there will be lots of love and tea today, just for you x
I haven't written a posthumous tribute for a while, but it would be wrong to not do one about Janice Long - for
@godisinthetv
. Thanks to
@welshmusicprize
winners
@adwaithband
@ghbonello
for valuable input re her support of contemporary Welsh music.
@BookishChat
When we first bought our place, a neighbour came out one day and said 'how many people live in your house, you're always carrying bags of shopping, you must eat well'. Walking to the shops and having no car is a crime now, to nosey people with no lives.
@K_IngalaSmith
@helenpidd
I'd like to know about how she aims to ensure the preservation of biological women's spaces. She's been asked a few times yet still hasn't provided a satisfactory answer. A black and white slogan delivered to righteous cheers isn't an answer.
27 years today since mine & Andy’s first date. We were so young, but didn’t think that at the time. Some nice things to have happened to me over the last days, one in particular I think he’d find v entertaining indeed. Maybe he had a hand in it somehow, who knows? Deciding yes ❤️
On Thursday night
@Calderstones
I lost this ring Andy bought me. I tried to put a brave face on things, but I was gutted. Tonight I was doing a little tidy up and it was playing hide and seek under the sofa cushions at home. So it wasn't lost at all, as it turns out ❤
I'd like to say how much
@macmillancancer
supported myself and Andy while he was poorly, esp during his final months, and continue to help me now. So many difficult, unexpected things crop up after bereavement, these people are always, always there for me. Total megastars imho x
Slow Summits the
@pastels_the
album from 2013 is an absolute favourite of mine, it never fails to cheer me up - and is on
#Timslisteningparty
tonight over on Twitter from 8pm! 😀
Victor (2009 - today). I hate the 'fur baby' notion but I will miss my hairy son's reassuring presence, a dependable constant over the past three very difficult years ❤
This weekend I was eaten alive by midges, saw Stella Donnelly play and it wiz great, learned it’s ok for a man I don’t know to shout ‘Cheer the fuck up luv’ at me in the street & I found a new charcoal drawing by my husband, of a tree. A mixed bag but I think positives outweigh?
This morning I received my first press release proudly stating the release is suitable 'for fans of
@adwaithband
'. The first of many, I'm sure. The artist in question is not Welsh
@LibertinoRecs
@JeanHatchet
They seem to think anyone with stage 4 cancer has to stay hospital full time, that's news to a lot of us, my husband was going for lunches washed down with a nice IPA and loitering around record shops, doesn't mean he wasn't sick. Lots of love to you, Jean x
Extending the £20 Universal Credit uplift is absolutely the correct decision if true, but surely it is an acknowledgement that UC rates in 'normal times' is insufficient to live on with dignity.
Bought Pepperberry dress from ebay for £6.50, congratulated self on mighty bargain + points re: saving the planet, only to find upon delivery that *whispers* ITS GOT POCKETS. All my adult life, I've never owned a dress with pockets x
You have two albums from Wirral music royalty
@thecoralband
to love and cherish next Friday, and on Monday I have a top notch interview with
@JamesSkellyBand
telling all about them. Over at
@godisinthetv
It's our wedding anniversary today. It will be marked and celebrated. Here is Andy on the morning of our wedding with my hat and flowers, gender nonconforming before it got trendy x
@BBCWomansHour
James seems to believe no woman in 2021 had ever been the recipient of negative behaviour by men because it's socially unacceptable to be wolf whistled at. A woman is killed by a man they know every 3 days pal.
The Ariana Grande show at Manchester Arena two years ago would have been the first gig for many of the girls in the audience. In solidarity, Merseyside women share stories of first concerts attended & celebrate their importance. READ:
I know the world feels a bit rubbish today, but I got a job offer this morn. Which is good. I might stop complaining about work now. Might. And I've got a new cat mug.
Three years today since Andy died. Spending the morning sorting his jackets and jeans for the homeless men's mission - it is time. Also I think Andy would enjoy the thought of the down on their luck wearing his flashy threads around Birkenvegas x
29yrs today since our first date. I love this pic of Andy in a swirly shirt w/ mug of tea in hand, random Phil Ochs photo on the door; we lived in a crappy flat, waiting for the mortgage for our house. Today I'm reflecting, & appreciating what's important in the here & now.
LOVE this shot of
@adwaithband
- from now on, all Welsh artists visiting Liverpool in a personal or professional capacity MUST have their photo taken at the
@welshstreets
MUSICAL TRANSLATION
Picking up from Welsh Language Music day,
@cathholland01
traces the growing popularity of Welsh language music by speaking to those at the heart of its latest resurgence. Featuring:
@adwaithband
@alffa_band
@HANA2Kmusic
HUGE congrats to all w/ stories in this year's
@TheBIFFY50
, announced today. Also giving a big shout out to Laura Black
@FictiveDream
, a gold standard editor who supports her authors both personally and professionally, top class.
Last night I submitted my first piece of fiction since my bereavement. Had a bottle of beer at an in-store, then did a double spin class – not a wise combination - I subbed after all that – again, not THE wisest approach, but we’ll see.
Girl at bus stop being sick cos of a long night in Wetherspoons. One woman gives her a bobble to keep her hair back, another gives her water 'to get it all out love'. Sisterhood in action.
I knew he was a man whore but the dv stuff is jaw dropping. Squeaky bum time as
#metoo
cleans up Britpop, maybe? >> Bluetones frontman Mark Morriss denies allegations of physical and emotional abuse
The very wonderful
@adwaithband
are playing Liverpool at the Cunard Building this Friday 1pm for Welsh Language Music Day. I'll be in a good mood & I'm told that's always quite entertaining in itself so yeah come, twice the joy and it's free so no excuses.
My short story The Second Brain was published by
@RetreatWest
in feminist anthology A Word For Freedom last year. At a spoken word event, a woman started crying - empathy re theme, not despair- but some menz found it offensive apparently. Though none said owt to me
#MyRetreatWest
Very sad to hear Geoff Davies has died. He put out two albums by Andy via Probe Plus, but more valuable to us personally, during Andy's final weeks he made him laugh, comparing their respective ailments, in great detail. And chatted to him about music, ever the painkiller x
Reading the new issue
@Mslexia
and nodding, nodding at
@AuthorSaraGrant
's article on writerly kindness - being a recipient of such this year, the notion of paying it forward is an aim for me.
Man in the pub last night introduced himself with 'some people call me a space cowboy some call me the gangster of love woo woo' and reminded me why I don't really go the the pub that much