Sarah Hunter Murray @SexDoctorSarah Twitter profile

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Sarah Hunter Murray

5 years

It’s book release day!!!! 📚Thank you to everyone who supported me on this crazy, amazing journey. I’m so grateful and my heart is so full. “Not Always in the Mood: The new science of #men , #sex , & #relationships ” Available TODAY!! @WonderLilly @FullCircleLit @RLPGBooks

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Consensual non-monogamy: A year of #sexresearch in review. What we've learned & what some of the top researchers still want to better understand. Featuring the amazing @jessrwood1 @AmyMuise @DrSchechinger & @RhondaBalzarini ! #CNM #polyamory @PsychToday

Consensual Non-Monogamy: A Year of Sex Research in Review

The sex research on consensual non-monogomy (CNM) is burgeoning, but the top researchers in the field still believe we have a lot more to learn.

www.psychologytoday.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

A colleague once said “open relationships don’t work - if they did we wouldn’t see so many folks w/failed attempts coming here for therapy.” And I’m like “ah... literally 80% or more of our clients are navigating struggles in their monogamous marriages/relationships, so...??” 🤦🏼‍♀️

Justin Lehmiller

@JustinLehmiller

4 years

This article basically argues that because #polyamory doesn't always live up to its ideals, it shouldn't be practiced. So since monogamy doesn't always live up to its ideals, it shouldn't be practiced either, right?

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Having an #orgasm means sex was good. Right? Not necessarily! @SaraBChadwick finds 55% of sample (hetero & queer, men, women & non binary folks) have had a “bad” orgasm. Why? Too “weak or short, feeling pressured from partner, & not emotionally satisfying. #SSSS2018

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

What do we really know about men's sexual desire? @ZosiaBielski takes a closer look at the research for today's @globeandmail featuring my book "Not Always in the Mood" and some great quotes from @DalCaSHLab Check it out! @WonderLilly @RLPGBooks

What do we really know about male desire? Not much, according to Canadian sex researchers

The culture of outdated norms surrounding gender and male versus female libido has ended up holding back a lot couples from reaching their true potential in sexual intimacy, researchers say

www.theglobeandmail.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

3 years

I partnered with superstar @DrLoriBrotto on a new paper: "I Want You to Want Me: A Qualitative Analysis of Heterosexual Men's Desire to Feel Desired in Intimate Relationships" See link below (or message for a free e-print!) #sexresearch

I Want You to Want Me: A Qualitative Analysis of Heterosexual Men's Desire to Feel Desired in...

Current sexual scripts for heterosexual relationships in the Western world stipulate that men should be the ones to initiate sexual activity, push to the next level of physical intimacy, and to des...

www.tandfonline.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

3 years

I had the absolute pleasure of chatting with @fakedansavage on the #SavageLovecast ! We discussed men’s desire in long-term relationships, the detrimental belief that men are always DTF, & how/why men and women are socialized so differently when it comes to sex. Listen here! 👇🏼

Dan Savage

@fakedansavage

3 years

New #SavageLovecast : Will the filibuster go the way of erotic bakeries? Also, where can a good woman find a nice bi dude and should a good gay cockblock a bad gay? Is there a duty to warn? And @SexDoctorSarah comes on the Magnum to discuss her new book!

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Does Attachment Style Impact Our Interest in Sex? A summary of the findings from @Kristen_Mark @laura_vowels and my research published in the latest issue of the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy for @PsychToday #attachment #sex #libido #relationships

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

YES! Excited to learn AND excited to share my latest #sexresearch on men’s desire to feel desired (and discuss how the traditional one-sided pursuer/pursued relationship is tired/outdated, and challenging these restrictive gender norms can lead to better #sex )! #SSSS2018

The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality

@Sex_Science

6 years

It's officially #SSSS2018 week. Are you as excited as we are?

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Why do some women prefer sleeping with younger men? A new study suggests it may be (in part) the ability to disrupt traditional heterosexual sexual scripts, including women's increased confidence in being sexually assertive. #dating #sexscience @PsychToday

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

That’s MY new book!! Featured in the Wall Street Journal! Thank you @EBernsteinWSJ for this thoughtful interview. I’m over the moon! @WonderLilly @RLPGBooks @FullCircleLit

The Wall Street Journal

@WSJ

5 years

A new book explores how a man’s desire fluctuates, why most men are eager to please their partner, and how sex—or the lack of it—affects men emotionally

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Our bodies can become sexually aroused from various stimuli but our mind does not always concur. @DrMLChivers reminds us that no matter who (male, female, or bonobos!) or what (assault, masochism) - it does NOT define our desire, our orientation, or our #consent . #SSSS2018

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

When a headline reports: “men more likely to have sex for physical reasons” or “women more likely to prefer romance, emotional connection” (etc) keep this in mind...

Stephen Vaisey

@vaiseys

5 years

What group differences look like vs. how people talk and think about them.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"We expect male desire to always be high and to be simple, like an on and off switch, while we expect women's desire to be a complicated switchboard, but they are both complex" - couldn't have said it any better! @Kristen_Mark #lowlibido via @WSJ

Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex?

Contrary to conventional wisdom, sometimes it’s men who first lose sexual desire in a long-term relationship, a new study finds.

www.wsj.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

It’s 9am and so far my 4 y/o has asked: - why isn’t it called a teeth brush? - what does “exist” mean? - if Grampa died but he’s still in our hearts how did he get there? Did he drive his car? - yesterday you said TODAY was tomorrow so how can it be today today? Please send help.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

3 years

🙋🏼‍♀️ I’m a therapist and I have a therapist to help manage my anxiety. And I 100% know that seeing a therapist not only makes me a better person, friend, mother, partner, it makes me a better therapist too.

The Caffeinated Therapist 🐝

@bellabee13

3 years

Honestly though if we can't eliminate the stigma of mental health issues WITHIN THE FIELD OF MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS how tf do we expect to do it anywhere else

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

My paper: "Heterosexual Men’s Sexual Desire: Supported by, or Deviating from, Traditional Masculinity Norms and Sexual Scripts?" now published in @SexRoles Link below! #men #masculinity #sex #sexresearch #relationships

Heterosexual Men’s Sexual Desire: Supported by, or Deviating from, Traditional Masculinity Norms...

Sex Roles - Sexual script theory and masculinity theory suggest that men should demonstrate high levels of desire in order to abide by social norms and expectations. The current study explored the...

link.springer.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

It's my 5 year anniversary writing for @PsychToday 🎉 And I recently learned that my blog posts have received over 5 MILLION views! (I just love helping to get sex research into more people's hands!) So I'm celebrating by sharing my 5 most popular posts. Hope you enjoy!

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Bisexual men & women in mixed-sex relationships may appear to be hetero/straight. But being "out" and accepted by family and community linked to higher sexual & relationship satisfaction (vs lower satisfaction when #bisexual identity is ignored/"erased") @Kristen_Mark #CSRF2018

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

A super important and fascinating look at how sex research came to over-complicate women's sexuality (and simplify men's) with great quotes from @SarivanAnders @dawson_sj and @JustinLehmiller @allieevolpe

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

“The fact that women typically say no to these requests for sex doesn’t tell us that women aren’t into casual sex at all, it simply tells us that women aren’t into casual sex with creepy strangers who proposition them on the street” 🙌🏼 #sexresearch

Justin Lehmiller

@JustinLehmiller

5 years

When research assistants approached students of another gender on campus and asked for sex, 75% of men approached by women readily agreed. Precisely zero women approached by men said yes. Here's why:

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

How does sexual desire change throughout marriage? New research from @Jess_A_Maxwell (& colleagues) and an important interpretation of the data from @WednesdayMartin in my latest for @PsychToday

How Sexual Desire Changes Throughout Marriage

New research suggests there may be significant gender differences.

www.psychologytoday.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"If everyone else was in a consensually non monogamous relationship, what would YOU choose in your relationship?" Study shows 60% would still choose monogamy, 40% open to the possibility of other sexual/romantic partners. Fascinating question and answers about #CNM at #CSRF2018

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Highlights of seeing fellow Winnipeger @DrJenGunter speak at the @TheWECC 🙌🏼 1. She giggled about spiking 7-11 slurpees w/ rum 2. @JenZoratti called her “the Neil Young of vaginas” 3. At signing *asked* “would you like me to write ‘fuck the patriarchy’?” (Does anyone say no??)

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

Curious about what the latest sex research can teach us about women’s #orgasm ? I’ve got you covered in my latest for @PsychToday 👇🏼 A Year in Review: The Latest Sex Research on Women's Orgasm @SaraBChadwick @SarivanAnders @JesMatsick #orgasmgap

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

If you haven't heard of Femmephobia (or even if you have!) you'll definitely want to check out @Femme_inist 's latest, & fascinating #sexresearch on how the devaluation of #femininity contributes to discrimination in the LGBTQ+ community 👇 @PsychToday

"Too Pretty to Be a Lesbian"

How the devaluation of femininity, or "femmephobia," contributes to the discrimination of LGBTQ+ identified individuals.

www.psychologytoday.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

3 years

@DrDavidLey I dug into the (limited) research on women with high libidos a little while back for a PT post (academic references are listed at the end) but it's more descriptive of women's experiences rather than talking about the relationship dynamics...

How Highly Sexual Women Manage Relationships

A review of the (limited) research on women with high sex drives.

www.psychologytoday.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

What inspired me to study men's sexual desire?? What do narrow stereotypes about men & sex have on men and their partners? What did I find the most surprising finding in my research? I discuss these great questions (and more!) for @FatherlyHQ

What Everyone Gets Wrong About Men And Sex

Dr. Sarah Hunter Murray, author of Not Always in the Mood, discusses some unspoken truths about men and sex.

www.fatherly.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Not sure what’s more concerning about re-watching American Pie as an adult: The scene where “Jim” and co. record & stream a teenage girl changing & masturbating w/o her knowledge (and SHE gets kicked out of the school) or knowing that I watched as a teenage girl and laughed...😞

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

I ❤️ a good "sex is healthy & positive for you" stat. But also just a friendly reminder that few of us are having sex 2-3x per week so no pressure if you're closer to the average (1xweek) or unable/uninterested in more frequent sex for any personal/relational/medical reason!

Justin Lehmiller

@JustinLehmiller

6 years

Men who had sex once per month or less were 45% more likely to develop cardiovascular problems than men who had sex 2-3 times per week or more.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"We're so sure that it's men who are 'wired to roam' & get bored w/ #monogamy faster than women do. But women are the ones who struggle especially with the institutionalization roles & domesticity dampening their desire" @JustinLehmiller @WednesdayMartin

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

Honoured to have “Not Always in the Mood” featured on this awesome list! Thank you @SexualityToday for the shout out & calling it “required reading” for hetero couples! 🙏🏻 10 books that will improve your love life, according to sex experts @WonderLilly

10 books that will improve your love life, according to sex and relationship researchers

Insider asked experts their top picks for navigating love, dating, and consensually non-monogamous relationships.

www.businessinsider.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Taking a road trip, playing beer pong, & learning to bake a pie. Just a few examples of self expansion activities which have been found to increase sexual desire and satisfaction in long term #relationships @AmyMuise #CSRF2018

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

7 years

Well, I'm officially adding "Good-Sex Pioneer" to my resume. Thanks for the feature @Cosmopolitan @ankarad !

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

Fun news alert! "Not Always in the Mood" is climbing up the Sexual Therapy best sellers list & is a "most wished for" book on Amazon. So do yourself (or your partner) a favor & start deconstructing what we think we know about men's desire. Now available in paperback! @WonderLilly

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

One of the very first “sex tips” I ever read in Cosmo was that men would find oral sex more fun/sexy if you placed doughnut around his penis and ate it off 👍🏼

Lillian Boyd

@herelieslill

5 years

what piece of cosmo sex advice most haunts your waking hours

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Of course it is! Glad to see more #sexresearch that helps frame men’s sexual desire as more than just a biological urge and simplistic drive to get off 🙄 @sexresearchnow @jsexmed

Malachi Willis

@sexresearchnow

5 years

Men’s sexual interest is a complex phenomenon influenced by their thoughts, emotions, culture, and sexual functioning.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

44% of men hoped for a photo in return, 33% hoped to find a sexual/romantic partner, 18% for personal gratification (eg, the thrill, hoping for a compliment), 10% to exert control/power, 6% misogyny, 6% unresolved childhood issues @JustinLehmiller

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Studies show that ~15% of men report experiencing problematic low sexual desire - yet we rarely talk about it. Researchers at @DalCaSHLab want to learn more about how low sexual desire impacts #men and their partners. Participants needed; please share!

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

The results are in! After reviewing 64 sex studies spanning 3 decades, here is what we know about maintaining sexual desire in long-term relationships: @Kristen_Mark @PsychToday #libido #relationships #sexuality #sexresearch

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

What do Canadian youth want from their #SexEd ? Information about healthy relationships, explicit knowledge about having sex, a focus on gender and power, all in a play based, fun way. Are sex educators up for the challenge? #CSRF2018 @actioncanadashr

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

Are couples more satisfied when they match in sexual desire? A new study by @AmyMuise @Kristen_Mark and colleagues finds overall desire may be more predictive of sexual satisfaction. @PsychToday #sexresearch

Are Couples More Satisfied When They Match in Sexual Desire?

New research suggests that maintaining desire may be more important to sexual satisfaction than finding a partner with the same level of desire as you.

www.psychologytoday.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Last night at a parent meeting one of the moms was talking about not enjoying playing games with her kids. Her: "I'm not a player" Me: "You just crush a lot?" And let me tell you... it did not get a laugh.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

The sad news is that many women report faking orgasms. The good news? Many women also say they've stopped. I dive into @DebbyHerbenick 's latest research about women's reasons for faking (and no longer faking) #orgasms for @PsychToday 👇

Why Women Fake (and No Longer Fake) Having Orgasms

The not-so-good news? Most women report having faked an orgasm. The good news? The majority have stopped.

www.psychologytoday.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

7 years

Cool new sex study alert! Only 18% of women in popular mainstream porn are depicted as having #orgasms (vs 78% of men) #sexresearch #JSR

Dr. Cynthia Graham

@cygraham_graham

7 years

New #JSR paper Consuming Ecstasy: Representations of Male & Female Orgasm in Mainstream Pornography @JustinLehmiller

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

What do you do when one of you wants sex - but the other isn't in the mood? I break down @laura_vowels & @Kristen_Mark 's research on which strategies are most (& least) effective for navigating sexual desire discrepancies in #relationships . @PsychToday

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

The first glimpse of the real, actual, you can literally hold this in palm of your hands copy of my book! I am officially one step closer to removing “well, sorta” after author. Available Feb 12, 2019!! @RLPGBooks FullCircleLit @WonderLilly

Rowman & Littlefield

@RLPGBooks

5 years

Wait, what month is it? We have spring and summer ARCs coming in and it's below freezing outside!

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

What are we still getting wrong about men’s sexual desire?? @ZosiaBielski at the @globeandmail is looking to talk to Canadian men in heterosexual relationships about their thoughts & experiences. Deadline is June 7. Full pitch below. Please share! 👇🏼

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

A “hall pass” isn’t for everyone nor every #relationship . But arguing for the extreme opposite (ie, that one partner should be able to fulfill ALL our sexual needs) isn’t necessarily the healthier mentality. @WednesdayMartin #CNM #monogamy

Dr. Wednesday Martin

@WednesdayMartin

5 years

Roughly 20% of men and women alike in the UK and the US told YouGov they had had an affair. That’s a lot of people struggling with monogamy! Would YOU give your partner a ‘hall pass’? | Daily Mail Online

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Is makeup sex "hotter" sex? Despite conventional wisdom couples who have sex after conflict report lower sexual satisfaction. BUT having sex after a fight is found to restore and rebalance some relational closeness. @Jess_A_Maxwell #CSRF2018

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

How does attachment style impact sexual desire & sexual satisfaction? @Kristen_Mark and I explore in our latest JSMT publication - now available online! The Impact of Attachment Style on Sexual Satisfaction and Sexual Desire in a Sexually Diverse Sample

The Impact of Attachment Style on Sexual Satisfaction and Sexual Desire in a Sexually Diverse Sample

Research has indicated that adult romantic attachment is influential and important to sexual and relationship satisfaction. Sexual desire, although not a direct focus of attachment literature, is h...

www.tandfonline.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

I’m noticing a lot of clients embracing “micro” moments: Quick, genuine check-ins vs longer emotional talks, suggestive touches & kisses vs always aiming for sexual penetration, small romantic gestures vs elaborate dates. When we’re exhausted these little things can mean so much

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

7 years

Yep this is officially happening! I'm writing a book! "What He Really Wants" coming soon!! @WonderLilly @FullCircleLit @RLPGBooks

Lilly, Agent to the Stars

@WonderLilly

7 years

Congratulations to @SexDoctorSarah on having her book 📙✒️snapped up by @RLPGBooks ! 🎉 #male #sex #relationships @suzanne_rlpg @fullcirclelit

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

7 years

#Masculinity is stifling men's expressions of #sexualdesire . My latest for @PsychToday : #sexresearch #men #sex

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

After years of working for other organizations I'm opening up my own therapy practice! I am excited, proud & a bit nervous. I'm also realizing how valuable it would be to connect with more #therapists on Twitter. Are there hashtags/groups/follows/supports you would recommend??

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

I don't know a whole lot about sex dolls, but I am a BIG fan of any entry point that leads to a discussion about the overlooked nuances of men's sexual desire! Pleased to see my book profiled along w/ @SexualityToday & @iankerner in this @guardian piece!

What I learned about male desire in a sex doll factory

If we look at it closely and with compassion, male desire is more complicated than most people assume it to be

www.theguardian.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

@kittycorr33 @HaveAwkwardSex Couldn’t agree more! In fact I wrote a whole book challenging this narrow stereotype called “Not Always in the Mood: The new science of men, sex & relationships” !

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

@jaclynasiegel I cringe every time I read or hear this phrase. It’s alienating and shuts down, versus invites, any chance of a meaningful conversation that can lead to change.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

7 years

@SexWithDrJess A highly educated and intelligent women talking openly and comfortably about sex and sexual health? Oh my! Nevertheless she persisted. ✊🏻

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"We are no less victims if we find a way back to joy. In fact, managing to reclaim our pleasure - whether through sex or other means - in the aftermath of sexual violence is a triumph" @TeenVogue #MeToo #pleasure #assault

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Women want to look and not just be looked at. We need to stop saying “men are more visual” ASAP via @bellesaco @suzannahweiss

We need to stop saying “men are more visual” ASAP

Men like to take charge. Women just want to be ravished. And, perhaps most annoyingly, men are more visual.

www.bellesa.co

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Believing our partner experienced an #orgasm when they didn't is problematic, no question. But the finding that I can't stop thinking about is that 6% of women & 17% of men may NOT realize when their partner had an orgasm. How unfortunate is that!? #orgasmgap @JustinLehmiller

Justin Lehmiller

@JustinLehmiller

6 years

Study: 2 in 5 Straight Men Don't Know How Often Their Partners Orgasm

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

“A lot of men have the expectation they need to be stoic, independent & take care of things on their own. And those can all be *helpful* tools. The trouble comes when those are the ONLY tools men believe they have.” HOW IS THIS A CONTROVERSIAL STANCE??

Perspective | How ‘traditional masculinity’ hurts the men who believe in it most

New American Psychological Association guidelines suggest that certain masculine behaviors can harm everyone — including men.

www.washingtonpost.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Aw shucks! Given all the amazing #sexresearch presented at @CSRF this year I am beyond flattered that my latest research on men’s sexual desire made the cut! Thanks for the love @DalCaSHLab !! 😊

Couples & Sexual Health Lab

@DalCaSHLab

5 years

Our newest lab member, Dr. Samantha Dawson (post-doctoral fellow), shares her top three learnings from the 2018 Canadian Sex Research Forum. What’s new and exciting in Canadian sexuality science?

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Gotta love the support a local author gets at her favourite local book store! #Winnipeg #Manitoba @mcnallyrobinson @WonderLilly @RLPGBooks

McNally Robinson Booksellers

@mcnallyrobinson

5 years

Here they are — Winnipeg's bestselling books of the week:

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"Sexual encounters ought to be pleasurable mutual endeavours. They should advance as partners earnestly and happily agree, not because one party merely grants permission to the other" Getting ‘Consent’ for Sex Is Too Low a Bar #consent #SexEd

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"A lot of men are out there having #sex without lust. Why did this get edited out of the story?" Long-story short: 1) journals were more interested in female #sexuality after years of being too male focused. 2) Accepting emotional #intimacy in men "goes against the grain"

Science of Us

@thescienceofus

6 years

We have many motivations for sex other than lust

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

New study found that 41% of men reported experiencing sadness, irritability, dissatisfaction and/or emotional "emptiness" after having #sex at some point in their lives. Far cry from the cliché that for men any sex is better than no sex at all! #sexreseach #sexmyths

Newsweek

@Newsweek

6 years

Men also get post-sex blues or "post-coital dysphoria," study finds

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

My two year old daughter just correctly used the word vulva and this may be my proudest moment as a sex educator. #proudmom #sexed

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

There is a pervasive social stereotype that men should be highly sexually skilled, always ready to have #sex , & the ones to "provide" sexual pleasure. But this narrow belief is leading to a slew of #sexual problems including #ED @NicoleRPrause

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

To the courageously brave and vulnerable men who are listening, learning, growing, checking your privilege, respecting women, changing diapers, talking about your feelings, trying your best & asking for help when you need it...You’re fucking awesome. Happy #InternationalMensDay

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

Recent study finds ~50% of #men reported feeling self conscious about their weight. 57% gay, 29% hetero men felt pressure from media to look attractive. 6% gay, 10% hetero men felt pressure from their partners to lose weight. #sexresearch #psychology #masculinity @JustinLehmiller

Justin Lehmiller

@JustinLehmiller

5 years

Many men are worried about how they look and, for some of them, these concerns are hurting their sex lives. #psychology #infographics

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"No wonder it's hard to ask for what you want! The second a request leaves your mouth, it’s up to the other person to decide whether or not to grant that request. It’s out of your control. And who likes to feel out of control?" @GottmanInst #relationships

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

7 years

"It's really easy to be perceived as hypersexual" - Bisexual woman in sex desire research: @Kristen_Mark #BiWeek

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Just sat down to write a @PsychToday post about our research on attachment, desire and satisfaction only to find out someone beat me to it! Guess I can cross that off my to-do list! @Kristen_Mark How Attachment Style Affects Sexual Desire And Satisfaction

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"Seduction is a beautiful form of flirtation that implies appreciation and respect... In order for it to feel exciting and sexy both parties must be willing participants and gradually be more and more drawn to each other as they go along" #DatingTips #MeToo

Esther Perel

@EstherPerel

6 years

If you feel complimented, you are being seduced. If you feel degraded you are being harassed. (via @Cosmopolitan )

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Academic brain: Hmm... the study is almost a decade old. I wonder if the findings have been replicated since then? And there may be social and cultural factors to consider... Literally every other part of my brain: I think I *will* open that bottle of #wine tonight...

Jess O'Reilly

@SexWithDrJess

6 years

This study suggests two glasses of wine before bed can make you a better lover... @Pretty52 @Jess_Hardiman

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

3 years

Year in Review: How the Pandemic Has Affected Our Sex Lives (so far) Thanks for the awesome research, as always @JustinLehmiller @Kristen_Mark @DrJustinGarcia @DebbyHerbenick and others! @PsychToday

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

“Women cannot be pigeonholed; the glory of human #sexuality is its variation and flexibility. When we speak of desire in the future we should acknowledge [women] thirst for the frisson of someone, or something, new as much, if not more, than men do.” @WednesdayMartin @TheAtlantic

The Atlantic

@TheAtlantic

5 years

"What are we to make of the possibility that women, far from anxious guardians of monogamy, might on the whole be more like its victims?" Long-term relationships can be tough on female desire, argues @WednesdayMartin

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Men in my research *consistently* describe feeling there is too much focus on the visual, surface level part of their #sexuality . I like this insight: that, in addition, women may be MORE visual & downplaying this could be repressing our sexual experiences.

Suzannah Weiss

@suzannahweiss

6 years

When will we retire the "men are more visual" crap? It's just another way to justify the objectification of women and repress female sexuality.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Received an email from a reader who had an "epiphany" after finding my @PsychToday article on #men and sexual #rejection . Now he and wife are working together to improve understanding & intimacy. Says he's "ecstatic." Man it feels good to know #sexresearch makes a difference.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"Though many parents encourage their daughters to aspire to traditionally male occupations, few encourage their sons to consider traditionally female ones like nursing, elementary education or social work" #MeToo #parenting #masculinity

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

@Kristen_Mark One of my favourite gynaecologists in the city has been doing this for years! She literally writes out a prescription to masturbate and/or to purchase a new vibrator 🙌🏼 #doctorsorders

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever accidentally stumbled upon an old "to-do" list and felt the total bliss that comes from realizing you completed everything on it and it's proof that at one time you had your life together?

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

5 years

@beccabryanne @LorneJCampbell That title! 👍🏼

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"It's high time we stop with the oversimplification of men and the over complication, by the way, of women." Great article by @JustinLehmiller featuring @EstherPerel 's words of wisdom & research from yours truly! #sexuality #men #sexmyths

Justin Lehmiller

@JustinLehmiller

6 years

Men's sexuality isn't completely detached from their psychology--there's an intimate interconnection between men's sexual performance and their emotional states

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

Study finds 33% of sample sexted for sexual reasons/foreplay; 66% for non sexual reasons (ie, as a means to either gain affirmation about their relationship, relieve anxiety, or get something tangible - non sexual- in return). Findings held across gender & sexual orientation.

Dr. Wednesday Martin

@WednesdayMartin

4 years

Why people sext—it’s not just About Sex, Research Finds:

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Helen Singer Kaplan introduced sexual desire to the model of sexual response. Rosemary Basson theorized about complexities/nuances of desire. @drRobinM mentored & helped launch my sex research career. I would not be where I am without these pioneers. #WomenInScience #IWD2018

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

I know I should be working but I'm completely consumed by the insights, honesty & emotional vulnerability in this thread. Men's need to feel desired. Pressure to be a sexual powerhouse 24/7. Barriers to talking about emotions. Piers Morgan. I'm eating up every last bit of it 🙌🏼

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

The Human Sexuality & Sex Therapy course for therapists in Manitoba is an *optional* 1 credit course (I.e., one month vs a full semester). I’m teaching it for the first time this September and I’m pushing to turn it into a mandatory full semester course because 🤦🏼‍♀️

DrJoeKort

@drjoekort

4 years

The mental health field has let us down by not requiring that therapists, counselors and social workers are trained in sex education and sexual health. #sexualhealth #sexeducation #sextherapy #mentalhealth

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Sexual rejection is hard - for the person initiating AND the person saying no. But new #sexresearch finds that these 3 things can help. My latest for @PsychToday : @AmyMuise #relationships #sextips #libido #intimacy

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

"Depression doesn't diminish a persons desire to connect with other people, just their ability." If you're in a position to offer support, here are some thoughts for how to reach in to someone struggling to reach out. #depression #SuicideAwareness

TED Talks

@TEDTalks

6 years

Here’s how you can connect with friends who may be depressed.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

7 years

#1 Touch Your Partner. Even brief moments of hand holding found to increase confidence of being loved @EliJFinkel #love #relationships

Eli Finkel

@EliJFinkel

7 years

The #AllOrNothingMarriage in @NYTScience : "Try These ‘Love Hacks’ to Fix Your Marriage." @NorthwesternU @PenguinUSA

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Both these things are true: Women & men need space to process sexual assaults and abuse that is largely at the hands of men. Men's sexuality is complex, nuanced, gentle, relational, loving, and not always pulsating out of their bodies.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Is #marriage really on the decline because of men's cheap access to #sex ? Spoiler: No it's not.

Is marriage really on the decline because of men's cheap access to sex?

An article purporting to explain a ‘decline’ in marriage has had a degree of viral popularity but does its argument stack up?

www.theguardian.com

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

7 years

Ever wondered how women really feel about anal sex? New sex research provides some interesting answers: @cygraham_graham #sexresearch

Dr. Cynthia Graham

@cygraham_graham

7 years

This JSR article is free access Heterosexual Women’s Anal Sex Attitudes & Motivations: A focus gp study @Sex_Science

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Happy #NationalBookLoversDay fellow bibliophiles! 📚 I recently finished @SexualityToday 's awesome book "Love Worth Making" and am currently loving @DrLoriBrotto 's "Better Sex Through Mindfulness" Suggestions on #sex and #relationship books to read next??

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

6 years

Evidence suggests married people are healthier, live longer than those single, divorced or widowed. But it's not walking down the isle or signing a #marriage licence - it's what partners DO (or don't do) for each other throughout marriage that matters.

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Sarah Hunter Murray

@SexDoctorSarah

4 years

“Many respondents recounted how the stereotypes about gay men’s hypersexuality made consent negotiation more complicated and challenging. Participants discussed a sense of normative pressure to always be ready for and interested in sex”

Raymond McKie

@RaymondMcKie

4 years

“Issues with consent may not be the same across all sexual preferences” - Nice summation of some of the qual. data from my MSc thesis. Continuing this important work during my PhD. #sexualconsent #sexscience #lgbtq #metoo

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