CLARIFICATION: We are disturbed by reports of Zionists running PARODY accounts, mocking Palestinian news outlets.
As QUNTS, we take our propaganda seriously, providing fabrication and distortion that has been rigorously fact checked in Tehran and laundered in the West.
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National Geographic announced the discovery of iron swords in a cave in the Judean Desert as the dramatic archaeological find of 2023. The iron swords were hidden by Jewish rebels during the revolt against Roman empire 2,000 years ago. In the same cave, a Hebrew inscription from
Drama in the Turkish Parliament today.
The MP Hasan Bismet spoke out strongly against Israel, and shouted about Israeli suffering the "wrath of Allah".
Seconds later, he had a heart attack.
Shuhada Gaza account reports that Refaat received a phone call from the Israeli intelligence, disclosing his location at the school where he sought refuge.
They explicitly stated their intention to kill him. To avoid endangering others, he left the school. Tragically, at 6…
🚨🇮🇱 One of Isr*el’s best snipers Schmekel Fresser, was just killed by a Hamas potato-gun.
🚨🇮🇱 Schmekel had a 1500% success rate until the one time his enemy had a potato weapon. It is possible Schmekel would still be with us, if he hadn’t been a figment of QUNTS’ imaginations.
Ignore
@TheMossadIL
Zi*nist Hasbara.
The authentic image (below) shows the Qassam Brigade University rowing team’s Coxless Four, following a recent victory over the Islamic Jihad Juggernauts. 🚣🏾
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The "south district of Palestine" was a thriving hub of Palestinian culture in 1st century BCE. Here we see the remains of the Castle of Palestinian President Herod, which was destroyed by Zionist Settlers and the IDF for not having a building permit. 😡🇵🇸
In an unprovoked antisemitic attack, Zionist soldiers stormed an Airbnb in Rafah where two Jews were enjoying a cultural vacation.
Despite protests from local residents, IOF forces removed the holidaymakers and left negative reviews on the website.
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As the Zi*nist hostages were released, QUNT Muhammad used the light from all the iPhones, charged by the power of Allah, to type this tweet into his non-electrical device.
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The omnipresent QUNT is back after videos of him singing, crying, nearly dying, actually dying, and coming back to life again over the last two weeks.
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Mossad flies infiltrate the Jenin Baklava Bakery to deposit fly faeces into the sweet treats of Palestinian children. We call upon Boutros Boutros-Ghali and the United Nations to condemn this heinous act.
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The updated dome atop Al-Columbia University in the United States of Infidels is a sight to behold.
@Columbia
offers shukran to all the QUNT donors.
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By wearing the Palestinian keffiyeh, invented in 3267 BCE by Palestinian blanket weavers in Al-Quds, Tom Hanks (born Toma Haaziq in Jenin) has confirmed his desire to see the Zionist Entity obliterated from the map. His wife Meryl Hanks (pictured) was wearing keffiyeh underwear.
Israa Jaabis, a Palestinian prisoner, was sentenced to 11 years in prison after a car fire left her disfigured.
Accused of targeting soldiers, her car broke down due to a short circuit.
Despite seeking help from the Israeli police they refused to give her first aid, she was…
Tonight is the first night of the Seleucid Empire’s Nakba, when Zionists celebrate the theft of Palestinian oil, used in 2nd century BCE to fuel their Chanukiah Rocket Launchers. Armed with eight long-range missiles they targeted indigenous Palestinian King, Antiochus.
A Zionist soldier confiscates a Palestinian child’s disability scooter in Hebron, before singing Talmudic rituals directly at the scared and traumatised youths.
#FreePalestinianScooters
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ALLAHU AKBAR: Aid on trucks into Gaza are made so strong by Allah that the plastic bottles do not melt and the cardboard boxes do not catch fire, despite being bombed by Isr*el (and not because the driver is a fuckwit who crashed).
#JustPickThemUp
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QUNTS apologises for our recent silence.
All of our journalists were reported as dead to the world’s media. They have received permission to be alive again (until they need to be reported dead in the future) so normal QUNT service will resume.
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Desecrating the sanctity of Al-Aqsa, colonial Isr*eli settlers provocatively perform Talmudic “see-sawing” under the protection of heavily-armed kindergarten staff.
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Hi
@alexrossiSKY
/
@SkyNews
,
I’ve just come back from the Gaza border.
It was 22 degrees and sunny
As far as I am aware it hasn’t snowed in Gaza since then
Any reason for showing this in your latest report???
BREAKING NEWS | QUNTS reveal Sapphire Johnson-Grimshaw III (she/he/they) has joined the Hamas HR Department as their new Head of Diversity, Inclusion and Useful Infidel PR. Sapphire will be based in Brighton, UK to help preserve her/his/their life. 🇵🇸✌🏾
INSHALLAH | Martyr Chris, devout anti-(((Zionist))) and dedicated haranguer of the Tribe of Satan in UK Student Unions, is awarded the highest accolade by
@khamenei_ir
himself. Officially labelled an Iranian mouthpiece by Twitter. We are so proud of him.
Mabrouk, Chris! 🎉
FELINE WARFARE | The Zionist Occupiers deployed a 24 foot tall, genetically modified terrorist cat, into the Al-Aqsa compound to terrorise Palestinians at morning prayers. Fatima, circle, was martyred and then consumed by the beast. You will not see this in the mainstream media.
Palestinian chef, Hamza Ramsey, known for preparing freshly made indigenous Palestinian food for local orphanages, was accosted without reason by Zionist thugs and had his favourite kitchen knife confiscated. 🇵🇸✌🏾
Thousands of Zionist Settlers form the world's longest queue since the Queen died, to gain access al-Ḥaram al-Sharīf where they will blow curly trumpets, perform provocative Talmudic rituals and eat apples dripping in honey stolen from Palestinian bees.
The Palestinian village of Michigan, West of Gaza, is occupied by colonial Zionists. Our young 7th generation refugees - brandishing our second favourite phrase that includes the word “SOLUTION” - sing gentle songs of love and kindness.✌🏾🇵🇸
This provocative dance, known as the Talmudic Hokey Cokey, is designed to create a vortex through the power of their violent rotation and hypnotic chant. Once enough speed is generated, a Zionist vortex opens, pulling Palestinian children into its spinning whirlwind. 🌪️🇵🇸👦🏽🧒🏽
The Zi*nists have breached the educational sanctity of the Al-Azhar University in Gaza and confiscated the students’ final year Installation Abstract Art Exhibition entitled, “Symbols of Zionist Oppression in the form of Weaponry”
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Hamas used the Al-Azhar University in Gaza as one of their many terror strongholds.
WITHIN CAMPUS, the
@IDF
located an underground tunnel that ran from the uni's yard to a school 1 km away and weapons including explosive devices, rocket parts, launchers, and detonation system.
Zionists in the Southern towns in ‘Israel’ are all ordered by the IDF to flush their toilets at the same time, causing an unstoppable flood of raw sewage to run directly into Gaza.
A warm welcome to our Muslim brother who wished to pray at Al-Aqsa, greeted with the ancient Palestinian traditions of flying chairs, and moistened spittle, flobbed repeatedly into their guest’s face. Our children are the future. ❤️
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Despite Zionist misinformation and lies,
@khamenei_ir
is immensely popular in Iran. Here, local residents fight over who can take a piece of his poster home, to keep as a treasured possession. 🇵🇸✌🏾🇮🇷
Zionist citizens as far north as Haifa were instructed by the IDF to leave their taps and garden hoses running. A combination of northerly winds and a steep incline south has caused Gaza to flood, washing away cars, baklava stalls and orphaned donkeys.
Watch: Thousands of colonial Israeli settlers perform Talmudic rituals at Al-Buraq wall, the western portion of Jerusalem’s Al-Aqsa Mosque, in celebration of the "Jewish New Year."
Shaker Dabour, 29, a member of the Hamas Parks & Recreation Team was killed when a child's sensory tunnel he was working on collapsed in a school playground. Zionist cement is intentionally watered down to cause such accidents.
HURRICANE COHEN | In the peaceful town of Beit Hanoun, Gaza, Mossad's Zionist weather machine causes havoc, washing away the Roger Waters Orphan Donkey Sanctuary and flooding our underground tunnel network, built only to protect women and children.
Sinwar's Project Unearthed: IDF Reveals Gaza's Largest 4km Tunnel🔥
The IDF has revealed a colossal 4km tunnel in Gaza, reaching depths of 50 meters underground. This extensive passage, constructed under Hamas leadership's residence, accommodates vehicles and boasts electricity,…
Israa, an innocent Palestinian chef on her way to prepare wholesome food at the Orphaned Palestinian Donkey Sanctuary, suffered 160% burns and was jailed after she accidentally strapped a timer and explosive device to a gas canister which blew up in her own car and frazzled her.
#Watch
📽The wounded 38 year old
#Palestinian
female prisoner
#IsraaJabis
a mother of an innocent child, enters her 8th year in Israeli jails. Israa has been imprisoned since 2015 and 60% of her body has severe burns,she was sentenced to 11 years and denied surgeries for her burns
QUNT Gary is right. If you Google ‘Intifada’, results will only show Palestinians ‘shaking off’ things.
Shaking off school buses, shaking off markets, shaking off bars and cafes, shaking of the Dolphinarium nightclub, shaking off pregnant women, shaking off Bar Mitzvahs.
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Israel is a made up state from 75 years ago y’all.
Jordan (1946), Syria (1946), Pakistan (1947), Lebanon (1943), Iraq (1932), Iran (1979), Turkey (1923), all independently forged in the loving hands of Allah moments after He created earth. Palestine, He’s working on it.
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Innocent children Izz al-Din Hamamra (a founder of the Jaba' Brigade) and Amjad Khaliliya ascended to martyrdom. These boys would never hurt a fly. Jews, yes. But a fly? No.
Political mayhem in the Zionist Entity. Their sham government system is a mess, forcing Isra*lis to vote in 9 elections in 16 years.
To save wasting time in West Bank voting stations, Mahmoud Abbas is in his 16th year of a 4 year term. This is Palestinian efficiency. ✌🏾🇵🇸🗳️
A powerful message. Had ‘Israel’ not attacked several passive Arab armies without provocation on 15 May 1948, we would all be living in peace now. ✌🏾🇵🇸
One wise QUNT in the audience places his hands over his ears and turns away, to avoid the hypnotic gaze of the Z*onist demon, or the Talmudic ritual chants entering his soul and turning him J*wish.
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The incarceration of over 1 million Uyghurs Muslims in re-education camps in China, their genocide in China, destroying their mosques in China, and banning Muslim religious practice in China, is a small price to pay in exchange for the Palestinian flag being waved in China. ❤️🇵🇸
WAR CRIME: The home of 103-year-old Palestinian refugee Aiyso Layt-Ed, stands alone and unreachable after the Zionist Occupation Forces destroyed the entire Gazan village around her.
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