Ned Balme @NedBalmeLives Twitter profile

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

Dad and ‘Jacko’ circa 1985 When characters were actually characters

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Last Seen Profiles

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

2 years

“If you’re gay or transgender, I love you. And if anyone gives you any shit, tell em Charles says f*ck you!” - Charles Barkley

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

I know the CCTV isn’t great, but I’m convinced some gangsta just dissed his fly gal

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@NFL_DovKleiman @InsiderGamingIG Nice of them to finally acknowledge the same complaints people have been making for 10 years now.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

The amount of people who bit on this is both frightening and outstanding

McNeil

@Reflog_18

4 years

Nice weather has brought people out at the March to End COVID-19 in Cleveland today. #EndCOVID

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@davidestcourt @theage These people are fucking idiots. They’re like a dog chasing cars once they get through the police line. No clue what they’re doing. No reason behind what they’re doing other than to have some sense of misguided purpose in their pathetic lives. A net negative on society.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

2 years

Wow - this video blew up. I don’t have anything to promote. Just do your best not to be a dick to people and we’ll all be alright.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@mysteriouskat @elonmusk

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@Phil_Lewis_ And the cop shows a tiny shred of humanity by checking on him, only to be told to move along by the other...fucking abhorrent

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

“Join The Dark Order”

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@adinross @Cobratate It’s extremely alpha to simp so hard over other people.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

A hand injury after two weeks alone in a hotel room. I'm not saying. But I'm just saying.

Craig Gabriel

@crosscourt1

3 years

JUST IN: Novak Djokovic has withdrawn from the Adelaide event with blisters on his right hand. He is replaced by Filip Krajinovic. It is not likely that the issue will affect Djokovic's other scheduled events

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

I can't wait to live in a world again where none of us know who the State Premiers and Chief Health Officers are.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 years

The last 24 hours in a nutshell... @PatrickClaybon @RapSheet

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@FieldYates There's like a 50% chance he'll be able to play with his dad

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@WWE You made Braun’s gimmick “human train” You under-utilised Black and release him after building him up Riott was one of the few women with a unique look on the roster and half of the only actual tag team And Murphy was one of the best workers on the roster Jesus F’n Christ

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if someone throws a flare at you, (regardless of workplace) I think you’re well within your rights to throw it back to where it came from… Don’t play victim when you tried to instigate. Stupid games, stupid prizes. #MCYvMVC #MelbDerby

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@AdelaideUnited The smile says it all. How good. 👏

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

The most poorly made yet accurate meme I’ve seen in recent memory

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

Hannah Baxter and her children didn’t “die in a car fire” They were murdered by the highest caliber of coward. They deserve better than to have their story sugarcoated. Call it like it is.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@Manny_Alicandro What are the odds they think “Hurricane” by Bob Dylan is about a literal hurricane?

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 years

Becky Lynch is a stone cold killer.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 years

@SageRosenfels18 I appreciate the courtesy of 26 to place his cup on the bench and not litter. Good character guy

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

2 years

@HoustonTexans If you look closely, you’ll notice this image is photoshopped. The players were probably holding something else. Most likely a football.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

I knew I’d seen that before 🤔 #broken

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

I’d love Port Adelaide to win the GF and then change into Prison Bar guernseys before the premiership trophy celebration.. Back page of every paper and eternal image of the win, PAFC giving the deuces to the league at Collingwood’s home ground in the traditional uniform 🙏🏻

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@Evan_M_G Life ban. Criminal charges. Nothing less.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@RMcElhenney Half of that is Mac providing extra context to movies, so people don’t get lost.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@ryanmwalters Good to know you’ll be fighting for segregated bathrooms…I’m sure there’s historical precedence of that working just fine 🙄

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

At this stage I genuinely don’t know why there is coverage of Ben Cousins I mean this in the nicest of ways, but the guy has been a drug addict longer than he was a prolific footballer That is who he is now, and that doesn’t warrant an update every time he fucks up

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 years

@mahatir_pasha Worth noting the first physical provocation came from protester kicking person trying to get him off the train...

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 years

@PaulineHansonOz I once entered a dance circle at a nightclub and anti-white prejudice led club goers to deny me my opportunity to bust a move under the pretence of white men can’t dance... #WakeUpToRacism

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

If not anything else, can we please retire “GOAT” in 2023?

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

The past 12 hours has seen Clementine Ford, Pete Evans and Kyle Sandilands all trending. Be better, Australia.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

“No cuisine”

Jackson Hinkle 🇺🇸

@jacksonhinklle

1 year

Australia is one of the worst countries on the planet. A) no one would notice if it sinks B) far too many dangerous animals/insects that will kill you C) mid women D) no cuisine

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@AustinRuney @ByKimberleyA It’s not really “thinking for yourself” if you repeat the same tired old tropes as literally every other person, mate.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

Fucking morons

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@AtlantaFalcons " What's that tweet say? GM and HC vacancies?"

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

Can we just appreciate how bonkers this is for the first inside 50m entry of a preliminary final? 1998. 45 secs after bounce. The Wiz. Ya kidding me.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@evansiegfried Long time NFL defensive coordinator, Rob Ryan

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

The shooter drove right up to Allen Premium Outlets, stepped out of the car and started shooting within seconds. No amount of “good guy with a gun” will ever be able to prevent that.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@CallumAltimas @WWE

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@AndrewBrandt Funny how those who demand so much respect offer such little back in return 🤷‍♂️

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@RGIII “You know a lot of kids are saying LIT these days… But this program has always been lit, lit with the burning desire to live the way God intended us to”

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

I can’t help but think how criminally under appreciated Tony Modra is in footy lore Howe in the air, Daicos on the ground, averaged 58 goals a year (129 in 93) Injuries, missing a premiership and a forgettable Freo stint didn’t help but there hasn’t been one like him since

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

Cornes, Carman, a mud pit at the Parade, a two finger salute, a shit kick, and big bump with a little of extra sauce on it for good measure. This has everything 👌🏻

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@ScottMorrisonMP You spoke with more conviction when watches were given to Australia Post workers.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@CairnsTaipans “We’ve decided to back players who don’t feel like doing something small to make marginalised communities feel more welcome” Streamlined it for you.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

While Twitter is losing its collective shit over @tommorris32 reporting the Hardwick news. It’s a good time to unearth this lace out pass he hit me with in an Under 14’s Grand Final. Absolute🥂🏈

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 months

Context matters. It looked and sounded awful. With the benefit of additional vision and references from people actually in the conversation - the context changes.

Basil Zempilas

@BasilZempilas

4 months

And the full version. Talking about the news up against the tennis.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

Nobody can “replace” Bruce, but I’m firmly in the camp that @JasonBennettTV should be next man up Classic play by play, energetic but sincere, does his homework, and complements colour callers An absolute pro who’s done wonders for #AFLW coverage. Deserves a shot at the top gig

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

I may not be a “Top G” and I’ll never own a Bugatti (let alone multiple) But unlike Andrew Tate, I’ve never been arrested on suspicion of human trafficking. So there’s that.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 months

Again, the Daily Mail proves itself as a gutter rag. Intentionally using “suddenly dies” knowing it will drive engagement from idiot cookers and conspiracy theorists. Exploiting an asthma related death of a much loved club woman for clicks. Those involved should be ashamed.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 years

@Protect_Wldlife I would give my left nut to be able to personally fuck this guy up.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

2 years

The amount of St Kilda supporters falling back in love with a bloke who left them high and dry and paved the way for a decade of ineptitude tells you everything you need to know about the desperation of a fan base

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

AFL won’t put the Showdown on a Friday night because they don’t want to admit it’s the best rivalry in the game. #AFLPowerCrows #AFL

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@atrupar I’ve heard that “Boat Floatillas” has replaced the metric system

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@Reflog_18 “He was run out of the league because of his faith” “I keep telling you, he was a bad quarterback and still ended up playing for four teams”

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

6 years

We need to reintroduce “Australian Rules Football” into our national lexicon. The laziness of referring to the sport itself as “AFL” has helped perpetuate this attitude that they can can alter the sport as they see fit.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@barriecassidy The problem with what Kenny is saying is that these aren’t “points of difference”, they are complete ideological opposites…of which the country by and large has rejected at a federal and state level across several elections over several years. This thinking is devoid of logic.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

2 years

The Showdown is the best rivalry in the AFL. Rain or shine, the fans show up. There’s a cultural divide between both supporter bases. It’s played at the best stadium in the country and most importantly, the games deliver more often than not. #aflcrowsport #AFL

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 years

@PaulineHansonOz This was shortly after my friend Sidney and I entered a lucrative street basketball competition and I received countless abuse as fans intimated that white men can’t jump, much to my horror.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@BernardGaynor Someone as physically and spiritually ugly as yourself would be hard pressed finding anyone consensually interested in you, so this take isn't surprising. Get off the planet, ya grub.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

7 months

I’d sell my soul for this tracksuit

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@StevoMedia @barrettdamian Collingwood and Essendon on Anzac Day at Optus Stadium then?

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

AFL RUCKMEN YOU PROBABLY HAVEN’T THOUGHT OF IN A WHILE BUT NOW IM FORCING YOU TO! A THREAD! 🧵👇🏻

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@GrogsGamut "We have one of the oldest and most successful democratic voting systems in the world... ...so let's fuck it up by bringing in the worst characteristics of the cooked American style of voting"

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

How McAdam’s bump is worse that Kozzie’s is beyond me He chose to bump instead of tackle land that’s not on, but he also dispossessed the player with the ball. Kozzie was late, left the ground, launching at a defenceless player who had already got rid of the footy.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

2 years

Jesse Venture GOING OFF on the Republican Party for their role in January 6 is the exact content we need today

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

5 years

Faced with a dilemma... How do I express my opinion that the Tayla Harris statue (albeit a tremendous sight) is way too soon, without being accosted for being a misogynistic prick?

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

8 months

@cameronwilson *local father doesn’t know how to communicate with daughter*

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

Family 🙏🏻

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@lizzyroseacosta @USWNT @NBCOlympics

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

Every guy saying “these girls were of age” is basically putting their hand up and saying “I‘m okay with school guest speakers cracking onto my daughter” It may not be a legal matter but it sure as hell is a moral one.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@atrupar Is there anything more sad and privileged than acting like you’re willing to die for a cause you know you won’t have to die for because you live in a first world country with a democratically elected leader?

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

2 years

We owe #RobbieWilliams a debt of gratitude for being so good that he’s held off the “we need a return to a night half time show” discussion. What a bloody champion. And how good is a day Grand Final at the G’? Everything is right with it. #AFLGrandFinal #AFLGF

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@geoffschwartz @nfldraftscout Nice to see Trump and Vince putting their Wrestlemania 23 differences aside

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

6 years

I've spent a good portion of today thinking about just how great James Clement's kick outs from full back were between 2003 and 2007

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

RE: Booing I think it’s fine under two scenarios, the rest is unnecessarily mean spirited 1. First game against a player who left the club (it’s part of the fun) 2. Opposition player does something grubby that injures your player Other than that, be creative in your heckling

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

37 SECONDS OF MIKE WHITNEY OFFERING PEOPLE 50 BUCKS!

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

When you’ve waited 18 months to play footy, you give the rev up at quarter time!

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

7 years

Is that who I think it is? @DanHanzus @ChrisWesseling @MarcSesslerNFL @greggrosenthal

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@atrupar

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@GBalloutine @Leo_Puglisi6 @TheBigMigShow He sounds Australian, because we are notoriously good at taking the piss out of Americans.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

Daisy Pearce: Provides clear and concise analysis of the Naughton incident and why it doesn’t make sense to treat it as a reportable offense in the process of the game Tom Browne: “I’ve got it graded medium” *slaps notepad* Well, guess that solves it 🤷‍♂️ #AFL #AFLDogsGiants

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

The ‘satire’ (I use that term very loosely) article written about Waleed Aly is yet another example of why we need mandatory high school and tertiary classes on identifying online misinformation.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

@jakeshieldsajj @mbfx99 For someone who posts so much about sex crimes and grooming, you’re really downplaying the seriousness of human trafficking allegations.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

I know he’s made a successful transition into politics but don’t know how anyone could vote for @BowdenJoel There’s video evidence of him misleading the public not once but three times!

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@lifelongcynic @peter_king He’s saying people with large platforms shouldn’t spread misinformation and then refuse to admit fault when they’re incorrect. Pretty simple.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@brfootball These are dope.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

@steph_dalzell I mean, I’m sure it was flasher than a genocide...

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

2 years

@Quartermain10 @AFL I don’t think we should forego tradition and create an insufferable day of waiting just to appease rights holders and people who are “too busy” to watch the biggest game of the year.

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

6 years

@theheraldsun Just when you thought they couldn’t get more out of touch with the fans

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

Port Adelaide being able to wear its traditional #PrisonBars guernseys is a win for footy The history of the game should be celebrated and not restricted by corporate deals and trademark disputes Kudos @PAFC and @CollingwoodFC for eventually getting it done #BringBackTheBars

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

3 years

Gotta love that sound 👊🏼💥 #longlivethebump

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

14 days

If the AFL is legit about this, there’s a certain player hoping for a lifeline next season who should not get close to a look in.

Jake Niall

@JakeNiallTHEAGE

14 days

. @AFL clubs to make a statement against violence against women in this weekend’s matches. @WestCoastEagles CEO Don Pyke led the push, with @NMFCOfficial support & now backed by all clubs. Statement likely to involve coaches & players before games. Details

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

8 months

Really impressed with @brisbanelions handling of the days after the GF. Players in good spirits with fans at club function hours after the game, met with fans in Fitzroy the morning after, flew back to Brisbane and spent literally hours signing autographs today. Well done 👏🏻

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

1 year

You can spot a heckler a mile away… It’s just the vibe 🤷‍♂️

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

@TimSmithMP Taking a page from the Trump book, hey Tim?

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Ned Balme

@NedBalmeLives

4 years

A story in three parts 1. Tim Smith says “leave politics out of sport” 2. I casually remind him of his countless political photo ops with sporting clubs 3. Like any good, accountable, politician, he responds with not a reply but a block 🤷‍♂️ Leadership personified.

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