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.com | They/Themπ³οΈβπ| Human Design, Astrology, & Spiritual Coaching | THIS IS MY ONLY ACCOUNT (BLOCK FAKES)
Iβm gonna pin the website Iβve been using for figuring out what your motivation is β¬οΈ
I will be referring to motivations a lot more so make sure youβre locked in
You can literally be single for months-years and avoid people thinking youβre healing but then all of those same triggers will resurface once you finally connect with someone again. Thereβs certain healing that can only be done while in connection.
First trailer for βQUIET ON SET: THE DARK SIDE OF KIDS TVβ, a 4-part docu series investigating the toxic environment behind Dan Schneiderβs Nickelodeon reign.
Premieres March 17 on Investigation Discovery.
Iβm reading this book that talks about jumping from relationship to relationship or job to job can actually be a form of self sabotage called uprooting. You are constantly needing a fresh start. You are always beginning a new chapter but never really finishing.
If you withdraw, shut down, or isolate when you are overwhelmed, you likely have an avoidant attachment style. When you were a child, you couldβve been left to handle intense emotions by yourself or not taught to self regulate so now you always feel you need to be alone to cope.
Aunt of the 19-year-old passenger on the Titan submersible says he was βterrifiedβ before the trip to the Titanic but went to please his dad because the trip fell over Fatherβs Day weekend.
My therapist gone sit up here and tell me that the reason I canβt get over what somebody did to me and Iβm still so angry about it is because Iβm actually still angry at myself and blaming myself but projecting my shame onto them. Iβm gagged.
If you end a relationship with someone or they end it with you, I promise if you give yourself enough time to get over that initial feeling off loss & missing them before you try and go back, you will start to process the red flags you missed and probably not even want to go back
Nah but have you ever realized you were gentle parenting your parents the way they shouldβve done with you!? Like, why am I the parent in this equation now trying to soothe you through your temper tantrums?
If someone expresses an issue theyβre having with you or they vocalize theyβre not happy in the connection and are trying to find solutions, try not to get defensive as your initial response. Theyβre likely trying to save the connection rather than just give up on it entirely.
Every person who abused me in my life was incredibly charming and friendly with everyone. Which confused the hell out of people and myself when I tried to explain the abuse to others. I felt like I was gaslighting myself everytime. Itβs very unfortunate.
Someone on TikTok said that healing is not becoming the best version of yourself, but letting the worst version of yourself be loved. Healing is saying that every single version of you deserves love.
This really stuck with me.
We really gotta discuss breadcruming in friendships/relationships bcβ¦itβs one of those things where we can easily gaslight ourselves into staying in situations bc someone is doing the bare minimum or just enough to keep us engaged.
The heart actually heals faster than the ego. Sometimes we think weβre still deeply hurt & affected by a situation when in reality, our ego is the one holding onto the pain our heart has already healed from.
I heard a quote today that saidβ¦
βThe people you lose during your healing process are only meant to be with the previous unhealed versions of you.β
Wow.
Youβll come across individuals in your life who are not bad people by any means, but they still cannot meet your needs or meet you where you are. You have to accept where people are at & if it doesnβt align with you, itβs okay to wish them well and love them from a distance.
There comes a point in your healing journey where in order to heal from certain things, you have to limit discussing it. Stop giving it your energy & over analyzing what happened, and just accept what is instead of reopening the wound over and over.
I absolutely believe that you can heal while in a relationship or with someone, as long as you both undertand youβre still accountable for your own healing. The other person can support you, but you have to do the real work and take initiative to heal yourself.
We talk about how codependency is so unhealthy in relationships but nobody speaks on hyper-independence, which is the complete opposite. Some people do not have the capacity to be interdependent with another person which can cause relationships to suffer.
Being in a healthy committed relationship has definitely been one of the most triggering experiences, despite it being incredibly healing. Healthy relationships challenge your comfort zone, your traumas, your fears, your insecurities, and so much more.
The signs Iβve noticed have a guilty pleasure with each other
Aries: Cancers
Gemini: Scorpios
Sagittarius: Virgos
Leo: Capricornβs
Libra: Pisces
Taurus: Aquarius
Itβs actually a learned mindset to not romanticize people upon first meeting them based on potential alone. You genuinely donβt know them as a person, you just project what you want or you take a few things you like and put it on a pedestal.
we still need justice for sandra bland.
we still need justice for breonna taylor.
we still need justice for deborah danner.
we still need justice for pamela turner.
we still need justice for korryn gaines.
I didnβt realize until recently that having a breakdown or being triggered when someone is mad at you or when thereβs conflict can be a trauma response. If your parents ever shutdown, gave you the silent treatment, or made you feel abandoned during conflict, it creates trauma.
Iβve been slowly learning to appreciate my intense emotions and sensitivity. There are some people I know who cannot cry, who want to connect but they canβt, who are numb and detached, but donβt want to be. Being able to fully process your feelings shouldnβt be taken for granted.
Toxic family dynamics donβt always happen to each child or sibling equally. Sometimes there is one main child that is singled out (known as the scapegoat) & used as the punching bag by narcissistic caregivers. Usually the more sensitive or βrebelliousβ child is singled out.
I really like the concept of βdemotingβ friends rather than cutting them off completely. Bc sometimes itβs no beef or not that deep needing to cut them off, butttt, they may need to be knocked down a few notches if they arenβt matching your energy or itβs not reciprocated
Someone brought it to my attention that we often discuss a lot about letting go but no one actually talks about the process of βhowβ we let go. Iβm going to make a thread of ways you can begin letting go. π€
A thread:
Itβs interesting how the main part of healing is learning how to properly feel your feelings, not just talk about them. Most of us didnβt learn how to feel things and let them go. We were taught to ignore, suppress, avoid, project, or just intellectualize them through reasoning.
There is genuinely nothing wrong with apologizing to someone months or years later after youβve realized your mistakes. Iβve done this before, and I have no problem admitting I was wrong. You donβt have to rekindle anything, but taking accountability is a huge step in growth.
A relationship or friendship doesnβt have to be abusive or overtly toxic for it to be unhealthy for you. It being unhealthy can show up in subtle ways such as you feeling like you canβt speak your mind, feeling misunderstood or the connection is just draining/exhausting.
A hard pill to swallow is that the more avoidant you are as a person, the less boundaries you usually have and the less trust you have in yourself. Someone with strong boundaries doesnβt need to avoid because they can be assertive and trust themselves to face conflict head on.
Jhene Aiko really said βdonβt take this personal, but youβre the worst you know what youβve done to meβ
LOL like I felt that! but it was personal af ππ
A lot of people believe in right person wrong time because we assume when we meet the βrightβ person, everything just falls into place, is super easy, & thereβs never going to be any difficulties. The reality is humans are complex & the circumstances donβt match up suddenly.
No, which is why we have generational trauma. Because all this time has passed and no one took initiative to do the tough processing, healing and reprogramming to break cycles, so it continues. Time aids the healing process but it doesnβt heal until you acknowledge it.
iβve tried being gentle about it and iβve tried being violent about it and iβve tried being patient about it and iβve tried being angry about it and iβve tried writing about it and iβve tried talking about it and iβve tried being quiet about it but it never fucking goes away
Scorpio & Taurus placements, we will be the main characters for the next 2 months π revisit this post by end of November and let me know what turning points have taken place.
Maybe you continue to have a fear of abandonment because you consistently abandon yourself in order to convince others that youβre worthy of not being abandoned.
Iβm always so fascinated by couples that have been together for 10+ years and are still very obviously inlove and have fun together. Like wow yβall are truly BESTFRIENDS. I love to see it.
Iβm realizing that our parents have such deep seated limiting beliefs about themselves and they project it on to us so heavily. All of their internalized fears, traumas, and feelings towards themselves left unhealed have no where to go so they fall onto us.
Hypervigilance can be a trauma response due growing up around unpredictable or inconsistent caregivers. This why when someone gives you a dry response or acts differently towards you, you may become very triggered and feel responsible for their feelings automatically.
Relationships can become more progressive when you call out red flags or pet peeves in the beginning. It gives you a chance to see if something is a character flaw or can be adjusted. It also gives them chance to take accountability and correct the behavior.
Your intuition is a lot stronger than you think. Just because you donβt have the physical evidence to back up what you feel, doesnβt mean itβs not true. Think back to the times when you had a strong feeling & were right about something. That ability is always there!
I donβt think people realize how much energy is in pictures, text messages, emails, etc. Erase it. Get it out of your phone. Throw things away. If you really want to disconnect from someone, the first steps are getting rid of whatever holds their energy.
One of those conversations we dismiss in friendships is enabling your friends bad or toxic behaviors. Sometimes you just gotta cut your friends off when they continue to stay in toxic relationships or they keep coming to you over & over about the same issues you helped them with.
As I get older, I realize my partner definitely canβt be my only friend. While yes, I want to have a relationship where my partner is my bestfriend and my love but I gotta keep the other relationships in my life solid along with that. One person cannot literally be my everything.
If you happen to feel like youβre mourning something or youβre saying goodbye to a previous chapter in your life, this is normal. The Full Lunar Eclipse weβre having tomorrow is helping us come to terms with what we need to let go of internally and externally.
Having an ego death looks like finally realizing that peopleβs, actions, thoughts, & responses have nothing to do with you directly and doesnβt revolve around you personally. It changes your whole perspective afterwards about how the emotions of others affect you.
Your body may not always know how to respond to intimacy or vulnerability so it responds in anxiety or panic. This is bc your subconscious has learned to associate closeness or expressing emotions as dangerous, so your body is having a trauma response.
One thing they donβt tell you about digestive health is that you can eat as clean/healthy as you want, but if youβre not regulating your nervous system, managing your stress levels & anxiety, your digestion will still not work as effectively as as it should.
As Iβm healing, I realize I associated love with intensity & super emotional highs/lows because it felt like passion. Healthy love doesnβt have the same addictive or intense feelings, itβs a lot more grounded, peaceful and calm, which can be mistaken for being boring.
When the right person comes into your life, you wonβt have to beg them for basic human decency or to show up for you, theyβll just want to. Once they know your love language, theyβll make an effort to try & always love you the way you need. Wait for that kind of love.
Expecting yourself to unlearn 20+ years of trauma, abuse, unhealthy habits or behaviors is extremely unrealistic. Be patient with yourself and your healing journey. You will not be able to unlearn & relearn everything in a short time frame. Release the expectations.
I have an inner child healing exercise that I discovered accidentally I feel called to share with you all! πΌπ½
Before you go to bed, put on your favorite childhood tv show in the background or really any childhood show lightly playing as you fall asleep.
The reason: Below π