Lvl 48 Writer of Wrongs. SINISTER, DOCTOR STRANGE, THE BLACK PHONE, V/H/S/85, SEA OF RUST, DAY ZERO. Five books, six movies, podcast. Formerly of Spill & AICN.
The most important thing in writing is to finish. A finished thing can be fixed. A finished thing can be published. A finished thing can be made into a movie.
An unfinished thing is just a dream. And dreams fade if you don't hold on tight enough.
So finish the thing.
The moment in BIRDMAN when a crew member, disguised as an extra, unhooks the wire allowing him to fly. Sometimes stage magic and filmmaking go hand in hand.
This is White House executive chef Andre Rush, and by executive chef I mean he's definitely an under cover SEAL Team member there to thwart a terrorist attack later in the movie, right?
Someone on reddit suggested that the Muppets should host the Oscars and it's pretty much the only thing I can think about anymore.
Staler & Waldorf heckling each winner
Dr Teeth & the Electric mayhem playing the Best Songs
Miss Piggy mad about not being nominated
NO CONTROVERSY
Your annual reminder that pumpkin spice is just a mix of cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves, and ginger - which tastes really fucking good - and it's okay to let people like things.
The idea that you could pour a year or more of your life into a project, actually shoot it, get right up to the finish line on it, and then watch it evaporate into the ether for a corporate tax break is a nightmare. I feel so hard for everyone reeling from this right now.
For those of you not in the industry, wondering how talks are going: THEY AREN'T
The AMPTP isn't meeting with anyone. They aren't negotiating. They are quite literally waiting us out, hoping enough of us starve and lose our housing.
That's it. That's their negotiating tactic.
The immediate fear of AI isn’t that us writers will have our work replaced by artificially generated content. It’s that we will be underpaid to rewrite that trash into something we could have done better from the start. This is what the WGA is opposing and the studios want.
12 Years ago DIGG was the leading social media site and the chief driver of traffic outside of search engines. After one monetization driven redesign, the site collapsed overnight as the userbase fled. Within a week it was dead as anyone knew it. It can and does happen that fast.
Friends came over last night to initiate me into the cult of RRR (RISE ROAR REVOLT) and I'm here to report I am now fully, truly, deeply a member. This is the craziest, most sincere, weirdest blockbuster I've ever seen. I'm pretty sure Jess and I are watching it again this week.
To give you a context of how historic a WGA/SAG strike would be, the last time this happened together not only was Eisenhower still president, but the actors union was lead by noted organizer and socialist, Ronald Reagan.
A reminder that the chief "unreasonable" things the WGA and SAG-AFTRA are both asking for are:
-Increased minimums for our lowest paid members
-Protection from replacement/duplication by AI
-Streaming residuals falling in line with television
That's what they want to deny us.
There are 261 work days in 2019.
If you write only 1 screenplay page a weekday (ONE!) you could write 2 1/2 scripts this year. If you write only 300wds a day on your book, you will have an 80,000wd novel by the end of the year.
Make 2019 the year your dream becomes a reality.
You gotta imagine George Lucas is sitting in a dark room, talking into a glass of whiskey, saying “A puppet. They’re all losing their minds over a fucking puppet. 40 years of technology later...a god damned puppet.”
I didn't make my first dollar writing until I was 30. I didn't sell my first novel or screenplay until I was 35. Many of you hadn't even heard of anything I'd written until I was over 40.
You have time. There is no expiration date on writers.
Someone on reddit once pitched an action comedy starring Elijah Wood & Margot Robbie as a married couple visiting Europe who get mistaken for a married pair of assassins played by Daniel Radcliffe & Samara Weaving and I think about how bad I want to see that movie A LOT.
Has Daniel Radcliffe done enough supporting and off-beat work at this point to be granted a new tentpole blockbuster franchise to lead? Because it’s time.
Writing is what I do for a living. Quarantine has cleared my social calendar & obligations.
And I'm writing less, not more.
This is a time of crisis, not a summer vacation. I cannot stress enough that you are under no obligation to pen the Great American Novel™. Take care.
The fact that Bob Iger gave an anti-labor interview while he is reportedly having a 2nd yacht constructed to replace his 184 foot super yacht might be the most on brand CEO shit of the year.
I had lunch with Tom Holland a few years ago on the set of STRANGE. Super good dude. My heart is with him today. As much as I have my own desires for the MCU, being caught in a corporate tug of war that will decide the direction of his life over the next few years has GOT to suck
HARSH WRITING ADVICE:
Snark isn't wit. Cynicism isn't wisdom. And arrogance will open a lot of doors but get you nowhere in the room with anyone who actually knows what they're talking about.
A brief reminder that I spent 4 years waiting tables, 6 years as a video store clerk, I was 30 before I got my first dollar for my writing, and 35 before I made my first sale (SINISTER). Just because it is hard now doesn't mean it always will be.
Just. Keep. Writing.
The president has gone full racist grandpa, CNN is dropping "shithole" like they're getting paid every time they say it, and Don Lemon just intimated that certain Americans can go fuck themselves...live on air.
And it's only January 11th.
2018, you saucy minx.
Every creative I know was told by numerous people that they should "be realistic" and that they "probably didn't have what it takes." Every. Single. One.
The books you read and the movies you watch were made by the people who didn't listen.
Be one of those people.
I am a community college dropout who waited tables for 5 years, worked in video stores for 6, and didn't sell my first novel & screenplay until I was 35.
Don't ever let anyone convince you that your age or circumstances will keep you from being a writer. Only you decide that.
Streamers have been selling us creatives on the virtues of platform exclusivity for some time now. The reason Hollywood is so shook by the HBO Max stories is that no one is sure whether this is an isolated incident or a canary in the coal mine. This isn't just about a few movies.
That dull roar you're hearing from Hollywood right now is the sound of everyone calling their lawyers and yelling "Wait, the streamers can just fucking do that?" This week just changed the game in a way no one saw coming.
THE THING was critically reviled, a box office failure, and condemned to a slow death in heavy rotation on cable before finding its audience and slowly, over time, becoming known as one of the greatest horror movies ever made.
Surrender control and just keep writing.
Every single writer you love, EVERY SINGLE ONE, watches other people's stuff and thinks "No way am I ever going to be that good."
Every.
Single.
One.
Of.
Us.
1999: Ugh. No, I'm not going to watch that Matrix movie. I hate Keanu Reeves. He's a terrible actor. Fuck that guy.
2019: Keanu is NATIONAL FUCKING TREASURE and I would literally pay to watch a video of him rolling around on the floor with puppies for 2 hours.
2022 is the 1982 of Horror. Horror fans are gonna be pining for this year for decades. The year end top 10 lists are gonna be wild. No one is gonna agree on what the best films are. There are too many. Even the controversial experiments are worthy of inclusion and discussion.
Alex Garland's MEN is the bastard child of HEREDITARY and GET OUT. A cerebral, surreal horror allegory with a deeply fucked up 3rd act that really fucking goes for it. See it with someone and plan for coffee or cocktails to argue about it afterward. I dug the hell out of it.
This is Heath Ledger all over again. We'll spend decades wondering what amazing things we would marvel at Boseman doing. His was a rare and powerful gift. He'll go down as a barrier shattering legend, and rightly so.
A: spending almost every day within 20ft of my wife. Having my dog around constantly. Feeling fulfilled with my work/life balance. Never waste time in my car rather than living life. Finish chores between meetings. No managers peeking in to micromanage/justify their job. Amazing.
Horror ages better than any other genre. When it’s old it simply becomes a period piece. Bad movies become fun movies, good movies become great movies, great movies become masterpieces. The only real crime in horror is being boring. Avoid being boring and horror has a long life.
I remember almost 20yrs ago, rooting for CROUCHING TIGER HIDDEN DRAGON to pull off what PARASITE did, only to fall to the conventional wisdom this would never happen.
I don't want this to be a fluke; I want this to be the 1st night of a new era.
Cinema isn't local; it's global.
Horror is one of the easiest genres to break into. It's punk rock, not pop. Very DIY. You can just pick up a camera and fucking make a horror movie. Horror fans gleefully look the other way when it comes to budget if in its place they find ingenuity, creativity, and passion.
HELLRAISER is a gnarly, gory, horny reinvention that feels closer to Barker’s prose than any movie before it. Hardcore and faithful, it expands the mythology without treading on it. It’s going to create a whole new generation of HELLRAISER fans. Fucking LOVE it. Streaming Oct 7.
When Scott and I were making DOCTOR STRANGE, the vast majority of Marvel's notes were about deepening character, strengthening the story, and asking us if we could "make it weirder."
Anyone who thinks Marvel is only trying to make theme park rides is being unjust and cynical.
So as of today we in Texas have the choice for senator between a guy who was in a punk band in the 90s or a guy who retold the Christian story of creation in high school through the art of mime.
You guys are fucking kidding me with this shit, right?
Anthony Bourdain was an ex-drug addict working in a kitchen when he published his first article at the age of 43. He published his first book at 44. Today the world is reeling at his loss. You are never done until you say so. It's never too late to become one of the greats. WRITE
Stan: a short thread on his birthday.
I met Stan Lee on, of all things, the red carpet for DOCTOR STRANGE. An assistant walked up to me and said "Excuse me, Mr. Cargill, Stan would like to meet you."
As a Marvel kid from the womb, my heart stopped.
HOW TO BECOME A SUCCESSFUL SCREENWRITER
1) Watch movies
2) Read scripts
3) Write every day
4) Go to the back of the Brown Derby
5) Say the words you find scratched into your arm
6) The goat thing
7) You'll know what to do when the time is right
8) So much blood
9) SO MUCH BLOOD
I cannot stress enough to all the pre-WGA hopefuls out there that the WGA does *not* play around when it comes to scabbing. This is not an opportunity to break in; it's your chance to get yourself counted out for good and for all.
Polish your scripts. Be ready for strike's end.
I say this a lot, but it bears repeating. The era of belligerent, abusive assholes running the show is over.
If you want a career in entertainment, whether film or books or music: be kind. Be kind. BE KIND.
As spooky season is upon us and many of you writers turn your thoughts to writing horror, I once again share my HOW TO WRITE A HORROR MOVIE CRASH COURSE
I wish more people would give BIRDS OF PREY a chance. That really was a delightful movie that feels like so many people are rooting for to fail. It deserves much better than that.
Me: I'm only going to make a Black Phone sequel if we have a really great idea.
*Phone Rings*
Joe Hill: So I've got a really great idea.
Me and Scott 30 seconds later: So we're making a Black Phone sequel.
There are 260 working days in 2022.
Writing only one page a day means writing two scripts or one novel.
Writing two pages a day means writing five scripts or two novels (or one LONG one.)
Just three pages a day is 7 scripts!
Page by page, you can finish that project in 2022.
A reminder to all you strivers out there: though I was first published in the local paper at age 15, I didn't sell my first screenplay and book until I was 35. This weekend was 32 years in the making. Don't let time put pressure on you. There is no expiration date on writers.
Holy shit. If the IATSE story is true, then Hollywood will literally change overnight. 10hr turnarounds, 54hr weekend turnarounds - the end of six day weeks, higher pay. This is fucking massive.
Someone just accused me of loving movies too much, and I've gotta be honest with y'all, I don't think that's possible.
There is no prize for disliking a film, nothing to be gleaned from dismissal. So don't just love movies, love THE EVERLIVING SHIT OUT OF THEM.
If you’ve ever typed the phrase “Hollywood is out of ideas” or “Hollywood is only interested in superhero movies and remakes” un-ironically, I challenge you to see one of the starkly original half dozen films your twitter feed is talking about in a theater this weekend.
TRUE STORY: Tom Holland visited the STRANGE set and we got to chatting. While walking to lunch together, Benedict was driven by. Ben pulled over to say hi, and I introduced them. "Tom, Ben. Ben, Tom." But all I could think was "Holy shit! Doctor Strange just met Spider-Man."
After PEARL, Mia Goth is going to be THE in-demand horror It Girl. Everyone is going to want to work with her. She's FUCKING INCREDIBLE. She's got that energy in that way that you know you're gonna watch her scare the shit out of you for the next several decades. So much talent.
Marvel shoots plates of every shot in their films in case they are needed for reshoots to ensure any shot appears seamless. This is very likely a shot from a reshoot inserted into a scene they did actually shoot on location or on a stage.
I have written 20 scripts professionally. 3 have them have, to writ, become movies. And I'm considered to be doing well.
This is hard for all of us. There is no shame in failing, only in giving up.
Just. Keep. Writing.
The great irony of the DGA deal is that the body of the DGA didn't believe the AMPTP would ever let SAG-AFTRA strike and they just wanted to keep working. They traded away a chance at real streaming residuals for two weeks.
Yep. Olivia Wilde’s BOOKSMART is this decade’s SUPERBAD and the best teen film since EDGE OF SEVENTEEN. So. Fucking. Good. See it big now or you’ll regret having slept on it once you catch up with it.
So an astounding 50,000 of you stopped by to congratulate me on quitting smoking. Thank each and every fucking one of you. Know that next time someone offers me a smoke, all I'll be able to think is "Sorry, brother. I don't want to piss off 50,000 people." You. All. Rock.
THE ORIGIN. A pre-historic survival horror movie set 45k years ago about a small tribe of people desperate to survive in a new land only to encounter something unknown and terrifying. Tense, violent and fascinating. Dug it!Entirely in an invented language. Opens wide in February.
If this week's discussion over Jon saying goodbye to Ghost being scrapped for budgetary reasons teaches us anything about storytelling, it is this:
Audiences prefer emotion to spectacle.
Fans would trade several dragon scenes to have one tender, teary goodbye between them.