Jesus follower. Writer. Old Soul. Crocheter. Mom to Jovie the Mini-Goldendoodle, Kobie the Cavapoo, & Arrow the Cockatiel.
#MentalHealth
#StorytellersNetwork
Just finished my first ever embroidery project! It’s imperfect, but I’m still learning. Now I just need to transfer it to a permanent hoop and bind up the back!
Before I share this, I want to preface it by saying I’m ok.
The dogs are ok, too.
Ok, here goes…
A man and his dog walked by the house.
Fortunately, Jovie & Kobie’s loud barking chased the man & dog away so we are all safe.
Be on the lookout for a man & dog walking.
She was holed up under a bush in front of the parsonage. She even had a soda & a bag of chips under there!
Sometimes I think about teens—how they try their best to hide (with snacks,) but they really just want to be found & accepted.
Find that teen & love them.
I’m headed to the dentist this morning for a cleaning. After all that dental stuff over the past couple of years, it can be anxiety producing.
Who else here struggles going to the dentist?
Let’s unify around our shared dental anxiety!
Is it acceptable to eat pie for breakfast on Thanksgiving—yes or no?
Asking for a friend.
No matter what you say, I’m doing it anyway.
I mean, my friend is doing it anyway.
TW: Disability/Racism
He held up the Santa to his wife & said, “Look at this!”
I looked as well. I was excited to see such an inclusive Santa.
With derision, he remarked, “It’s ridiculous! The black Santas are bad enough.”
It took everything in me not to tell him off.
During summer youth group we played capture the flag by flashlight. The game was over & we were missing a girl. After waiting 10 mins, we adults got concerned & searched the property. Then 45 mins later she showed up—very sad no one found her. But we were ALL looking for her.
I’m tired of people who aren’t single & aren’t female telling me how I should act & what I should do.
As far as I can tell single ladies supported Jesus ministry, washed his feet, stayed at the cross, & bore first witness to his resurrection.
We’re doing ok for ourselves.
Friends, let’s pray for
@BethMooreLPM
as she enters into book release week. Memoirs are extremely personal & powerful, as I’m sure Beth’s is. Therefore, you know those who wish to tear down will be acting foolish. Instead, let’s support Beth. Feel free to post prayers below.
Friends, I just need prayer.
I’m feeling a lot of things right now. The ongoing saga of my big toe is amplifying a lot of other things from my past.
I’m overwhelmed & struggling to think logically at times.
Sometimes it’s really hard being a human.
@photowhitehouse
@realDonaldTrump
Who on earth wrote this caption? “Dancing with the sunset?” Not only is the picture still AWFUL, the caption got worse.
Now that Beth has her donkey, I can reveal him to all of you.
That’s a little cast iron skillet of cornbread he’s sporting.
Follow the 🧵 to see today’s adventure…
I’ve been a single adult in church my whole life & it’s lonely out there in the pews. Churches are built around marriage & family. If you don’t fit that mold, you’re defective.
I’m not going to marry some rando so I fit in.
Singleness can be a gift, but it’s never a defect.
I don’t know about you ladies, but I’m feeling pretty powerful today! 💪🏻
We can’t even shatter the glass ceiling or infiltrate the ol’ boys club, but we are destroying society.
Must be all those yoga pants & backless wedding dresses.
Anything but the patriarchal white guys.
I’ve decided to learn to speak Spanish. We have a high Spanish-speaking population in our area. It’s a great way to learn to love by neighbor as well as to spy on unsuspecting Spanish speakers in public places.
I’m trying Duolingo.
Anyone else use an app?
Alright, here we go! Single girl vacay is happening!
It’s not what I planned, but I’m trusting God with those details.
Please pray for me as I drive 4 1/2 hours!
Six years ago my mom took her last breath here & her first breath in heaven.
Like today, it was the day before T-giving. Maybe that’s why this year hurts so much.
My mom read A LOT, liked Yorkshire terriers, & her fave Beatle was Paul.
Her name is Donna & I loved her.
Yesterday I bought shorts to wear somewhere besides the gym. It the first time since I was in middle school when my mom told me fat girls looked fatter in shorts.
I decided my body is what it is & sweating all over was just gross.
And I think I look pretty ok as I am.
I will never understand American Christianity’s response to the pandemic. I’m so grieved by reckless choices that lead to real life consequences for the whole community. And I wonder in the Church’s failure in this also grieves the heart of God.
@freedomsbride
I’m trained as a biblical counselor. While it was really helpful as a ministry leader, it didn’t qualify me as a trauma-informed counselor. In my program, we learned when to refer & too many people are afraid to refer. I’ve suffered at the hands of other biblical counselors.
I waited in line at
@HobbyLobby
to buy buttons & sighed as an 80-something old man chatted up my cashier, Luke M. Luke was very kind as they talked. Unsteady on his feet, the elderly man seemed to gain strength in the attention he received. I realized I was witnessing the sacred.
@Andrew_Novell
@JohnnieM
@POTUS
@realDonaldTrump
@WhiteHouse
Were we watching the same clip, Johnnie? All I see is an arrogant man-child using the God’s Word in a stunt to buy support from his evangelical voters as he turns thus country into the dictatorship they say they don’t want? He’ll walk over stacks of corpses for adulation.
An older lady at the pool asked me if I went to church. I told her I’m looking so she suggested a bunch of evangelical churches to me.
I told her I didn’t want to go to a certain church she mentioned because they don’t permit women to be pastors.
Her: WOMEN CAN’T BE PASTORS!
Live updates from my craft show on this thread:
Feeling incredibly anxious & insecure. Already had a lady put down a $10 wreath ornament like it was poison when I told her the price. 😭
I’m still angry about the pastor with the $2,000 sweater & do you know why?
Disabled people on SSI disability receive $914 a month in cash benefits (at the most) as well as SNAP & Medicaid.
You could support 2 vulnerable people a month with the cost of that man’s sweater.
When I left my toxic church, a rumor was started. They said we left because BFF Sarah & I were secretly gay.
We’re both heterosexual women with an enduring friendship of 22 years.
It hurt because as singles, we get tired of every close relationship being called sexual.
I sit at the end of the pew because churches give me panic attacks and I don’t want to trip over your young kids running out of the sanctuary if that happens.
But I could just stay home & stream. If I do, how would all the “rude” singles watch your kids in children’s church?
Just a FYI, it is never ok to say “no wonder you’re single.”
You don’t know WHY a person is single or the pain it can bring.
Why we’re single isn’t a topic on which you need to speculate.
If you want to know, just ask. Got it?
Don’t weaponize singleness.
Anyone who suffers from anxiety disorder knows this: you cleave to God a whole lot more because you know you cannot make it through your fear without Him.
It takes a lot of faith to trust God in fear.
What if anxiety is a conduit for faith for some, not a lack of faith?
I have a huge praise!!!
I found a trauma-informed therapist who takes my insurance…and she’s faith-based!
I have my first session the last week of May, so I’ll let you all know how it goes.
But we’ve been praying for MONTHS!!! Thank you, God, for hearing & acting on this!
Single moms, you are freakin’ rockstars!
Many of you didn’t plan to raise kids without a partner & it’s hard. Some of you said, “I want kids without a partner” & did it anyway.
I want to wish you a happy Mother’s Day today because you’re always busy & I want you to see this!
She told me it wasn’t biblical—her answer for every issue. Finally, I asked her where these things are in the Bible.
She didn’t know.
I got bold & said, “Just because you don’t agree with a view doesn’t mean it’s ‘unbiblical.’ We’re all trying our best to follow the Bible.
I really need prayer right now—for healing, decisions/wisdom, hope, & some potentially scary things. I’m really struggling. This is the hardest it’s been for me for years. I am terrified & I’m trying to see God in this…which is so hard.
One thing I learned in seminary that I carry with me to this day:
Don’t be a theology snob.
Be grateful you have a good education, help others understand who God is & how to know Him, love deeply in His name.
Theology needs to flow from this type of surrendered, open heart.
This afternoon, BFF Sarah & I said goodbye to Maddy. She lived a good 14 years, was so very loved, and was the best dog in the world. We are devastated at her loss. Please pray for us. Thanks.
Tokyo failed his test to become a seeing eye dog, but now he goes to the middle schools in the district to hang out with students who are having a rough time. Yay Tokyo!
A precious friend needs prayer right now as she navigates an unknown future.
She takes brave steps forward & her controlling almost-ex is tries to keep her captive,
Will you join me in asking God to intervene for her?
Please comment if you’re praying so I can tell her! ❤️
We got in an accident.
A lady made an illegal turn into the car I paid off a few months ago.
Her insurance card is expired.
She casually sauntered over & said, “What happened?”
Her entitled attitude is what makes me the most angry, not the deductible I’ll have to cover.
Hey friends! Thanks for sticking with me. This is the worst anxiety I’ve had in my entire life.
Today pray for:
1. Lessening of panic attacks
2. Headache/physical symptoms
3. Blood pressure
4. Clarity & mental peace
5. To feel God’s comfort & intimacy
I appreciate you all.
My depression has been pretty bad & now my anxiety is roaring, too. It’s knowing it would help to move, but feeling physically unmotivated to do so while having adrenaline cycle through me. I’d appreciate prayer. (I’m being treated for it, so please no well-intentioned advice.)
@freedomsbride
Really to the point it added to trauma so I often don’t tell people about my training. Honestly, I think I’m better equipped from being in therapy, than from being trained in it. Churches need to get with it & take the time to really understand mental health.
Today is a heavy day.
On this day, four years ago, I saw my mom for the last time.
We knew it was the last time we’d see each other here on earth.
She died 4 days later on 11/22, around 8:15 pm on T-giving Eve
I miss her so much.
While I really love pie, I really dislike Thanksgiving. This year is hitting me hard—probably because all the anniversaries fell on the same days as 2017.
Some things can’t even be solved with a caramel apple pie—just time and therapy.
Happy Friday
#WeirdChristianTwitter
!
Post a gif that represents you in high school or your high school experience.
Maybe ❤️ the post before answering so I don’t get ratioed yet again. 😉
#WCTQuestions
We didn’t think he should be alone.
So on Thanksgiving 6 years ago today—the day after my mom died—BFF Sarah & I drove out to my stepdad’s house armed with gas station hoagies.
He kept asking me what I wanted to take of her belongings. He made one-off remarks about me.
Since it was in the 30’s, I blow dried my hair after my shower at the gym. And since it looks good, I took a selfie so I could brag about going to the gym & having some fierce hair. You’re welcome!
Also, post a brag pic so we can celebrate you today!
I’m not in a good place today.
Saying that makes me feel like a broken record that never ends.
This is my journey of trauma & chronic mental illness.
Thank you for faithfully accompanying me on these sometimes dark roads. ❤️
I finally finished my kraken hat!!! This was a looooooooong project I considered quitting several times, but since I paid $8 for the pattern, I persevered!
If you have a pic of beaming kids, naughty puppies, your great uncle who fell asleep, a cool gift, or a cookie spread that would make me weep, post it here!
My fave gift below: This was made by
@riahthelee
& paid for by BFF Sarah. It’s my mom’s handwriting embroidered. 😭😭😭
We chatted briefly. Despite everything, I missed the good times with her a bit.
But I didn’t ask her to hang out or try to buy back affection. That was a healthy boundary.
I walked away w/ my head held high knowing I did the right thing…and healed in the process. ❤️
Today is a major trauma-versary for me & my body is keeping score. The intensity is heightened this year. I think maybe because I’m healing.
When I arrived home I found this plant in my front steps. I have no idea where it came from, but it was a sweet God wink.
Hey. My dad & his partner have covid. They’ve had it for a week. They’re on Paxlovid & are slowly getting better.
My dad is in several high risk categories & has Parkinson’s disease—definitely struggling with this.
I also had a panic attack visiting a church.
Please pray.
One of the biggest surprises of 2020 was
#WCT
. As it became clear this was, yes, a ministry area, I worked hard to build community along with others who created shenanigans, a list, a podcast, & groups that has even met up.
#WeirdChristianTwitter
has been a haven for me & others.
I won’t be the “est” of anything—funniest, godliest, smartest, meanest, ugliest, prettiest.
I’ve been trying to be “est” my entire life; it just leaves me wanting, seeking, trying.
Empty.
Life is not a high school yearbook. You don’t need to be “est.”
Just be you. ❤️
But it seemed like a futile use of my energy.
I live in a world where Santa Claus is accessible to everyone, especially the outsiders in need of hope & cheer.
We create Santa in our own image & it’s beautiful that modern Santas can be any race & in a wheelchair.
I decided to make some baby & child hats for next Saturday’s craft show…and I just cannot handle this!
And I didn’t even blow dry the pom yet!
(Btw, there’s a button sewn in that makes the pom removal for washing!)
That Rachel Hollis video & follow up “apology” hit a nerve.
I’ve worked hard all my life—to get A’s, learn as much as I can, make friends, connect others, to be a person of God.
All my hard work didn’t earn me wealth or even reciprocal inclusion in friend circles or connection.
I’d appreciate prayer. My anxiety is off the rails. I was badly triggered last week at a doctor’s appointment. I’ve managed it thus far, but it’s getting worse. Plus, physical pain in my pain is getting worse so that’s fueling it. If you could pray for both, I’d be grateful.
Decided to try something new…do you like it? Dislike it?
This ear warmer might be my whole personality now.
(Reposting because I accidentally made it so people couldn’t comment.)
I think I might be at my most beautiful with no make up, grubby walking clothes, hair tied back with loose pieces flying the wind, freckles alight, & walking on the woods or paths with my camera or notepad looking for beauty and inspiration in God’s creation. 😉❤️
*Tell me about your worst date ever.*
I went to dinner with this guy I liked & I think he liked me. He looked me in the eyes & told me he was in love. My whole body filled with warmth. Then he told me he was in love with a mutual friend.
I.
Was.
Devasted.
#WorstDateEver
So a necessary med is out of stock.
The back up med is out of stock.
The third med needs a prior authorization AND won’t get to the pharmacy for 24 hours after approval.
My last dose is tomorrow, so if I don’t get that pre-auth tomorrow…it won’t be good.
Please pray.
It’s our birthday today!!! Kobie turns 1 today on National Puppy Day and I turn 1 +42!
I’m not feeling the greatest because of side effects from a new med so I’d appreciate some prayers!
My therapist is leaving me. Besides my BFF, my therapist is the person closest to me due to the intimacy of the relationship. She was my therapist for the past 4 years & was my therapist when my mom died. I’ve made so much progress with her.
I’m just not ok. I’m devastated.
The awesome thing about being single they never tell you is that you can live with your BFF in a house you own & still be an independent woman.
Choosing not to marry can make one’s life bigger & more of an adventure than marriage can for some of us.
Let’s get real for a second…
I’m not ok.
I’m grieving what Parkinson’s is doing to my dad.
And it scares me.
I’m mad at my SI joint & sad I’m not driving in VA right now.
Some moments I just tear up & during others I’m fine.
This is real life. It’s ok to not be ok.