Babs Gray Profile Banner
Babs Gray Profile
Babs Gray

@BabsGray

23,905
Followers
2,309
Following
1,619
Media
21,970
Statuses

don't talk to me, unless it's an emergency listen to my podcast @lady2ladycomedy if you don't hate women

Los Angeles, CA
Joined December 2008
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
instead of losing weight i've been trying this new thing where I buy clothes that actually fit
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
Me: I really need to cut back on unnecessary spending Also me: This shirt is necessary for my mental health
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
NO BIG DEAL KENNY G IN MY LIVING ROOM!!! Happy Valentines Day 💋💋💋
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
Fleabag’s impact continues to resonate
@nypost
New York Post
5 years
Pope Francis considers lifting celibacy requirement for priests
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
how can I start subtly dropped hints to my bf about the kind of ring i want
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
If you, and I can’t stress this enough, don’t like Los Angeles, you can, and I can’t stress this enough, Not Fucking Live Here
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
just found a flat earther who appears to make a living off his dog winning surf competitions which is so funny cause like where do you think the waves come from bro
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
Last year I texted a guy “Happy International Women’s Day, eat my pussy”, and he DID! Highly recommend
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
I don’t think I should be forced to see Ed Sheeran shirtless
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
thinking of deleting social media and making the switch to organic anxiety
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
Really love this guys sign that just says “HORNY”
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
Did you know that instead of working on your creative goals you can have orgasms alone in your room
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
Another comedy show, another slew of male comics who say they’re afraid of commitment while wearing pants they’ve had since 9th grade
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
Tinder = meet at $16 cocktail place, get fingered beneath industrial lighting Bumble = cramped coffee shop before 10 am, side hug that leaves your shirt damp from his sweat OkCupid = Buffalo Wild Wings, make out against car in parking lot of Home Goods
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
10 years
so if i spend my time eating cheese, watching Netflix, n having orgasms alone, i'm 'depressed', but if someone else is there i'm 'in love' ?
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
Let's be clear - Britney is NOT yet free. Her father is simply saying he will allow a transition to a new conservator - "when the time is right." There's a lot more fight ahead.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
I cannot believe how strong Britney Spears has been to endure this for the last 13 years
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
Last night some douchey khaki bros were annoying us at the bar and one put a blazer in our booth so I filled its pockets w cheetos
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
Well, it happened... I bought so much Taco Bell that the passenger seat belt alert went off
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
guess it was over once he got a glimpse of me in the nosebleeds on molly
@PopCrave
Pop Crave
2 years
Harry Styles and Olivia Wilde have split after nearly 2 years together, @People reports.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
I'm sorry this freelance graphic you are underpaying me for is two hours late, I had to drive to Long Beach at 4 pm on a Tuesday for no money to talk to a 39 year old man about the time I lost my virginity on the podcast he co hosts with his ferret
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
case in point:
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
Well here goes the rest of your night everybody
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
do I need a "posture correcter" or do I need "less tits"
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
BRITNEY JEAN SPEARS WEARING A #FREEBRITNEY SHIRT. I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
I know it’s hard out there right now and in an effort to give back, any ex boyfriend who responds to this tweet and tells me exactly what they did wrong in our relationship will receive a $20 venmo from me
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
everytime I google "what clothes are good for big boobs", it's ALWAYS a wrap dress. Why don't clothing manufacturers just try to make actual flattering clothes for fat bodies?? It's not 2004, I'm not wearing a floral wrap dress in everyday life you fucking dorks
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
Mkay I’ve been a good girl and stayed inside and worn my mask and now I would like to go do drugs in Las Vegas please
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
I haven’t been to a restaurant or bar in 6 months and it’s so wild to see photos of people going to them cause...it’s easy... not to??????
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
November 12 - Britney will be free!!!!
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
I’ve met so many ppl who think I’m a bitch because of my twitter feed then irl they’re like oh you’re actually nice and it’s like no I’m a fucking coward get it right
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
1 year
Someone filmed Britney without permission in a restaurant and sold the footage to TMZ. Have we learned nothing from what this woman went through in 2007/2008? She's not just here for your fucking amusement. She's deserves to be able to go out without people gawking and filming.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
I’m feeling a lot of feelings today. Britney might actually be freed from her conservatorship. I can’t actually wrap my mind around it, but it’s on the table for the first time ever. I’ll be there inside the courtroom. Send good vibes - that Britney is free TODAY
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
I am somewhat ready to watch 300 white men in backwards caps high five each other on a float that represents the women they’ve never made cum
@carolynryan
carolynryan 🏳️‍🌈🏓
5 years
“Straight Pride” parade planned in Boston. With floats.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
I’m gonna do an Only Fans but just one picture that downloads an 1/8 of an inch at a time so you kids can experience porn the correct way
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
Font choices are important
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
JAMIE OUT!!!!!
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
1 year
Okay, internet strangers. You're right. When dirt poor Britney Spears signed at record deal at 15 then quickly became one of the most famous ppl in the world, she KNEW she was signing away her right to privacy and respect for the rest of her life.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
My time has come
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
@ThaRealDeSade god...you're right. heaven forbid I be comfortable in my body
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
The pink tie!!!!
@etnow
Entertainment Tonight
3 years
Britney Spears’ lawyer, Matthew Rosengart, addresses the crowd after Jamie Spears is suspended from her conservatorship.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
What happened at Britney Spears’ court hearing today: a bunch of people who aren’t Britney Spears got paid BY Britney Spears to decide what to do with Britney Spears’ money, without her consent or approval. AKA - same shit different day
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
This guy left my comedy album focus group because I said that Bugles should replace communion wafers so the priests could wear them on their fingertips
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
This bitch walked down the aisle to her own song and that’s the least embarrassing thing in this
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
Well I’m dead officially
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
I’m not saying I’m depressed but the only thing in the world that sounds appealing right now is falling into a giant cinnamon roll
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
What my bf sees when we do missionary
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
I wish I was skinny enough to wear ugly ass clothes
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
Well, I tried, but ok boomer just doesn’t have the same ring as yes daddy
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
I swear to god you fucking Tinder turds if one more of you says "oh standup, yeah I've been meaning to try that" I'm going to smash your dumb dick like Gallagher
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
I fucked a lot of idiots and didn’t get any of the writing jobs I wanted. There’s my decade bitch
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
I’d like to shout out to myself for being the fattest I’ve ever been because FUCK it’s been really fun getting here
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
8 years
hope men in Ohio become required to have funerals for their cum
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
she's right it is dangerous how many boners everyone would get if i wore this
@IsabelOakeshott
Isabel Oakeshott
2 years
This, in a Regent St fitness store, is what obesity looks like. Flabby curves highlighted in hideous lime green velour. The so-called “body positivity” movement is not “inclusive”, it’s dangerous.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
Who needs to lift weights when there’s an metric ton of invisible dread on your chest at all times
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
You know you’ve been in LA too long when someone you’ve had a threesome shows up in clown class
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
A keto IG account I started following years ago has transitioned to adorable pics of the lady and her wife with nothing about keto and I wish this fate upon all diet instagrams
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
All I want for Christmas is to get drunk in a dive bar and sing karaoke and all you anti vax fucks ruined it
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
::Hitler dies:: Me: lol fuck yeah hitler died Reply guys: UMMMM dont you think that’s a bit MUCH to wish DEATH upon Hitler? He’s a person like U and ME Me: lol fuck yeah hitler died
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
If you are replying to this telling me I’m privileged, yes I am, and so are the people I hear making this complaint 🙃 also so much congrats on the great person you are, truly an angel sent from above to police tweets w your righteousness
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
My friend @TesstifyBarker and I started a comedy podcast about Britney Spears Instagram and then it was like oh what’s up w this conservatorship and now uhhhhh today happens and I am numb
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
8 years
Even Stephen King is shocked at what Trump said and that guy wrote about a giant God turtle fighting a spider who was also an evil clown
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
i'm sure this has been asked but what did all the people having affairs do when Covid hit
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
It’s incredibly annoying that alcohol no longer solves my problems
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
I asked my dude to be my boyfriend last night, mostly because the condom broke recently and I have a sexual fantasy based on the song Brick
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
remember, this was NOT her first court appearance. She appeared two years ago, after #freebritney went viral, telling the court her dad had forced her into a mental health institution and drugged her against her will. This was the first court appearance that's been OPEN
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
I got so excited to hear @DennisDMZ 's jokes about @michelleisawolf , I made a countdown clock!
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
If you are only interested in my comedy because you think there's some chance we're going to hook up or some bullshit...yeah we might
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
Britney...just...posted... #FreeBritney
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
I’m dating an abstract painter, which is great because I can’t tell if he sucks
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
Taking a bath in your living room
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
Today is a really big day for Britney... she could possibly finally get an attorney she actually WANTS (She's been talking to a former federal prosecutor) Really hoping she gets a powerful legal advocate in her corner for the first time in 13 damn years. #FreeBritney
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
AHHHHHHH
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
Okay so after 35 you’re just tired... ALL the time? This is some bullshit
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
This thanksgiving I am thankful for my big friggin tits, my huge white ass and my cool ass clit
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
I saw such a bad play last night at a reputable place so please everyone stop being scared you aren’t good enough because dear lord there is some dogshit art out there and I bet yours is better
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
Betty, take us with you
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
#FreedBritney today is a beautiful day. I love every person who had a part in making this happen.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
@ofctimallen I did it better Tim
@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
we're called pansexual because we always have someone on the back burner 🍳
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
in LA I'm single as fuck but if I lived in portland I'd have two lumberjack boyfriends and a biscuit that just comes over to eat me out
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
My favorite goof is telling people my actual appropriate rate for freelance work and them never responding
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
Britney is pregnant!!! So fucking happy for her and also remembering...last time she was pregnant...she gave us Blackout. 👀
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
How is there so much beauty in the world and also grown adults telling teens a mass shooting was their fault
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
Lord grant me the confidence of a comedian who asks for tour money on GoFundMe
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
My questions following Cats: Why are Taylor Swift’s cat breasts so large? It seemed like a CHOICE Does Ian Mckellan understand where he is Why hire professional dancers and then CGI 80% of the dancing?
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
I had an OnlyFans in my 20s except it was just a bunch of open micers who saw my tits and I didn’t make any money
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
What the fuck is up with people having babies
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
People are trolling Tess and I for selling tickets to a livestream show - we are performers y’all. We’re putting on like an actual show. With guests who we need to pay. With time spent on content and writing material. Wild that we’d try to get compensated for our time, I know.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
9 years
If you don't think women are funny, I will personally entrap you inside my womb, birth you again, and raise you right this time
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
i need to stop getting offended when someone who I think liked me four years ago gets a girlfriend
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
just another day reviewing Britney Spears's legal documents over lunch anybody else????
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
10 years
whenever a guy's like 'where should i cum??' i'm always like 'IN THIS JAR'
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
2 years
i WILL get Covid to bring Britney Jean Spears some fucking Advil
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
7 years
Oh no I spent all this money fixing my sidewalk cause I thought real men loved curbs
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
the Jon Lovitz Comedy Club will actually be RE-opening due to Covid-19
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
Please keep complaining about LA instead of changing literally anything about yourself
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
5 years
If I ever win an award I’m going to thank this extra in Rookie of the Year for showing me what really going for it looks like
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
4 years
Every kidless person my age has replaced children with sourdough starter
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
6 years
Thank you @KarenKilgariff and @GHardstark for the shoutout on @MyFavMurder . Here is a baby named Barbara.
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@BabsGray
Babs Gray
3 years
Serving u Pebbles realness
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