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Gretchen Felker-Martin Profile
Gretchen Felker-Martin

@scumbelievable

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649
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Beyond the grace of God, a wanderer in the outer darkness New novel CUCKOO out 6/11/24 from Tor Nightfire pfp by @theomayscough Repped by @dreamoforgonon

Worcester, MA
Joined May 2011
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@scumbelievable
Gretchen Felker-Martin
6 months
After 12 years, I'm logging out. I can't thank the friends and readers I've met on here enough. This account will continue to post updates for the Deadlights Theater and my books and film crit, but if you need to contact me you can do so at gretchen.felker.martin @ gmail . com
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
This is a MONTHLY budget. The rich have absolutely no connection whatsoever to reality.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
I wish I was Zeus. I wish I could just fling a thunderbolt and be done with it.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
The idea that a world ruled by women would be a kinder or gentler one is, in its own way, deeply misogynistic. Women are complete people. This entails a capacity for cruelty and an inability to cope with holding power over others without enacting violence and oppression.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
"Where do I stand on the -- on the WHAT? The "Transgender Question"? Well for one thing, sir, I recall the last few usages of that particular phraseology. A group of millions is not a question -- I have not yet finished speaking -- not a question, but a demographic."
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
french horror is like "the skin... an ill-fitting garment for my sordid existence..." and italian horror is like "oh no frangela, knife-hands the serial stabber has escaped from knife prison"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
how do you write? first, make a gay little man. now give him a problem.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
The Green Knight cost 15 million and looks better than basically anything that has ever cost over a hundred million. Money is fake and craft is everything.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
I can't stop laughing at this
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
6 years
I googled "fat weasel" and I was not disappointed.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
the punisher said "trans rights are human rights"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
5 years
ah͚̹́.̘̙̕.̳͓̟̜̱͖.͓̪̩̫͘M̯͕̘͈r̞̹̻̤͎̰͟.͍̭̺̗̯̗͢ P͍͟o̪͕̝̻͔li̴̭̫c̯̫̫͇͍͈e̵̖̯.̲̼̘̝͎͎̝͟ ̺̼̞͎͓̻ ̵̳͈ ͓̥̮̹̰͎͜He̵̦ļ̟̫l̼̠o̧̦̫͈͖
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
6 years
No matter how carefully you construct a villain's tragic backstory, your D&D party's going to come at them exactly like this.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
Wow turns out I had never in my life experienced fury until the second I read the sentence "the shooter now claims he is non-binary"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
6 years
AFAB: Assigned female at birth AMAB: Assigned male at birth ACAB: All cops are bastards AHAB: Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering whale; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell’s heart I stab at thee; for hate’s sake I spit my last breath at thee. Sink a-
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
oh you haven't had mcdonalds in HOW many years? should we call everyone? should we have a party? should we invite bella hadid
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
Twin Peaks is a perfect demonstration of how to make a murder mystery about the victim rather than the killer and that lesson has been resolutely ignored by all subsequent "a beautiful girl got murdered" fiction.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
I have absolutely no problem saying the shooter isn't non-binary and that his attempt to cast himself as such is nakedly false and manipulative. I have a working brain and understand this bears no relation to misgendering newly out trans people.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
Every time we grind our teeth at J. K. Rowling, we should instead thank christ that Roald Dahl died before he could start tweeting the worst shit imaginable.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
6 months
god damn
@sofeachipscake
Sofea.
6 months
I wanna put this on my timeline. I think most of us are tired with the “are you condemn Hamas”. We all can relate to this guy
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
This honestly makes me so emotional
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
7 months
Elon changing the terms so it's okay to call trans people pedophiles and groomers on a whim and then immediately banning the first person to do it to him is so exhausting, you can't even crack a joke about it. He's so pathetic. A worm.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
never forget the 20th century's great bodying
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
Man Who Is Sad About How Good at Killing He Is
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@clambuoyance
charlz 🇵🇭💜
1 year
What’s your favorite type of character? Like the one that you always tend to gravitate towards
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
Porco Rosso could easily outfly and kill Maverick from Top Gun
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
4 years
I shit you not, I turned on NPR and heard "we've spent today listening to the native peoples of the Arctic, but there's one group with a huge stake in the area's future we haven't heard from -- the oil and gas companies"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
The thing about SKINAMARINK is that the kids do not at any point have a video camera. The only explanaton for the footage we're seeing is that it's been curated for us by the entity tormenting them, like a home movie/snuff film.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
6 months
i don't know what you can say about a nation so obsessed with bloodlines and ethnic purity that it shoves cattle prods up dead soldiers' assholes to harvest their sperm that the whole thing doesn't say for itself, you know?
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
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@MuseZack
Zack Stentz
1 year
So much of culture writing & online discourse is 2 million mostly professional class coastal liberals talking to each other, and it's unhealthy. You don't have to be lowbrow, but for God's sake, it's a big country. Show a little curiosity about what everyone else is watching.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
It's all "be gay, do crime" until it's a trans woman performing actual meaningful resistance to hegemony, then the tenderqueers start wringing their hands and finding reasons to dissociate from her.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
Learned just now that in Australia, milk is considered a "beach drink". Degenerate continent.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
Learning that a disabled queer artist lost her health insurance, her home, and finally her life to suicide after colleagues got her fired for the high crime of... drawing INVADER ZIM porn. I'm speechless.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
"When Darren Aronofsky and Christopher Nolan make careers out of ripping off Satoshi Kon"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
"IT DOESN' MADDA WHEDDA THEY'RE IN DA MATRIX OR NOT; CONSCIOUSNESS IS ITS OWN PRISON, AN' DA FIVE SENSES AH' ITS WARDENS! DA TRUTH IS, YEH JUST AFRAID *WE'RE* IN DA MATRIX, AN' EVEN IN A BOUNDLESS DIGITAL WONDAHLAND YEH LIVIN A COWAHD'S LIFE, LIKE A DOG!"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
seeing some shit like "Special effects for The Creature" in the credits is maybe the single best indication you're about to watch an absolute fuckin banger
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
i have crossed oceans of time to find you.... one, two, three oceans! ah ah ah!
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
Undefeated best tweet of all time, tragically.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
drinking the hot broth out of a bowl of ramen is exactly what i've always imagined it feels like to take a health potion
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
This is just not a valuable way to approach film.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
11 months
If you accuse artists of condoning or even DOING awful or uncomfortable things depicted in their art with no proof beyond that depiction and your reaction to it, you are an unsafe and destructive person who has not yet learned to navigate adult society.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
DeviantArt banning fetish art is like a whale banning krill.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
oh my
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
10 months
lmfao jesus christ
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
7 months
Remember when a bunch of cowardly sci-fi authors hemmed and hawed and said it was "complicated" to work for arms manufacturers and we shouldn't judge them for it?
@chronicalihere
HAYDAR
7 months
From a journalist in Gaza— the missiles raining down are American made, by arms manufacturer Woodward, located in Fort Collins, Colorado. A reminder of how all settler colonial violence is interdependent.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
11 months
I cannot for the life of me understand why people think shit like this means a single goddamn thing. A book can be about Russians. Russians are people, not orcs from Mordor.
@GilbertLiz
Elizabeth Gilbert
11 months
Important announcement about THE SNOW FOREST. Please note that if you were charged for your pre-order, you will be fully refunded. Thank you so much.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
it's insane that people still think, against literally all anecdotal and scientific evidence, that predators target conventionally attractive women at a disproportionate rate when in fact the opposite is true because "ugly" women and girls are easier targets
@schizarella
misha꙳
8 months
you cannot convince me "pretty privelege" is real when this happens everyday. sometimes you really wish you were mid because of the safety boost it provides.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
11 months
I think what many people fail to grasp is that modern billionaires are 1=1 with the moronic, desperate kings who paid alchemists and magicians fortunes to make them immortal. They believe money grants them magical powers and protects them from any and all consequences.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
"One joke stretched until you can hear its joints popping like some poor bastard broken on the rack. "Oh my car has pronouns, I identify as a bird, I'm trans-Chinese." The laziness of it -- shameful. You should see the transgendered roast themselves; there's true scorched earth."
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
Aimee Terese saying "you will never be a woman" to a picture of HERSELF is like the posting equivalent of a bird flying into a mirror and breaking its neck.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
"The Romans had their castrated priestesses, the Hindus their Hijras, but my god, let us take to the barricades because Uncle Al came to Thanksgiving in a skirt and pantyhose! It's the province of rubes. Hayseed reactionaries and the worst effluvia of America's suburban colon."
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
The experience of being homeschooled is completely encapsulated by the time I went to a book club for homeschooled teens and there was a girl there dressed in a crushed velvet revolutionary war uniform who introduced herself by saying "I fancy myself a bit of a libertine"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
10 months
TONY: Carmela my wife I am home from crime CARMELA: Hello Tony my husband TONY: I love you my wife CARMELA: Marriage is a sacrament TONY: Yes
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
"What business is it of mine if a young man requires -- no, I will not play linguistic games with you. I will not engage in sophistry, sir -- requires the services of an abortion doctor? Last I checked it bore no cost in blood for the Bette Midlers of the world!"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
kinda funny that to "ghost" someone means the single universally agreed upon thing that ghosts do not do, which is leave
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
The "problematic authors" list was made by a 20-year-old so I'm not going to link it or quote-dunk, but I think it's very telling that she draws no distinction whatsoever between the behavior of the authors and the fictional happenings of their novels.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
The essential problem with Whedonesque dialogue is that it has no respect for wonder, terror, or mystery. It's rolling your eyes at the most profound visions of ecstasy and horror the universe has to offer.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
New horror movie plot just dropped
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
I made the most successful author in the history of the world so mad she wrote a whole shitty book to cope with it.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
Learning that the stupid Harry Potter game was produced by Nazi gamergater Troy Leavitt and includes at least one reference to the 1612 fettmilch pogrom... wow.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
"And Chapelle! My god, Chapelle. Embarrassing as only a true great can become in his declining years -- I speak here with complete self-awareness; kindly hold your barbs -- as he tires of innovation and falls back into the soporific cushion of the lowest common denominator!"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
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@nytimes
The New York Times
1 year
A campaign against transgender rights has mobilized the Republican Party. How did that happen? Listen to today's episode of The Daily.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
4 years
Do you have any idea how much cum I've swallowed, you coward?
@Jack254__
This is Jackson
6 years
Two slices of pizza are equivalent to swallowing 3 spoons of warm oil. Do you feel like eating pizza now?
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
"Oh Game of Thrones isn't realistic because the dragons wouldn't really be able to fly" bitch the most popular shows in the world involve cops regularly solving crimes.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
6 years
The bear that fights Jaime and Brienne on Game of Thrones would only perform if his handlers brought him frying pans full of whipped cream and everyone applauded while he ate them, which is very close to what I want out of life.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
Kept hearing someone on this beach shouting "crab master!" until I finally looked up and saw three little boys dropping crabs in a bucket in front of a six-month old before kneeling, bowing, and saying "crab master" reverently
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
I was held and loved as a child by arms tattooed at Auschwitz, and if I ever hear one word of denialism from anyone they'll be on a scavenger hunt for their teeth for the rest of their life
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
switching the pronouns to stay straight when you cover a love song is the Coward's Way
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
Channel Zero: Candle Cove has unquestionably the best monster design of the past decade. Maybe the past two.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
how's he gonna drink the coffee, genius
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
I think about Debbie Jellinsky every day of my life.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
Twitter is so amazing because the richest, most powerful people in the world who could be doing absolutely anything with their time CANNOT stop logging on and getting kicked in the balls
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
Imagine being the most cringe and craven man alive, universally despised even by your own children, and then picking a fight with dril
@dril
goalie hunter
1 year
dont worry i reviewed my profile myself and its still really good. please let me change my name back to normal now
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
11 months
Do what you like, but my god. Grow up.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
Brianna Wu's leaked DMs revealing she's a sad, miserable transphobe who hates direct action and has no actual beliefs... who could have seen this coming
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
7 months
insanely baller move for ANDOR to be like "that chick from one scene in ROGUE ONE and a few seconds of RETURN OF THE JEDI? a full quarter of our season is gonna be about her shitty marriage, and it's going to be fucking riveting"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
Apologizing to my cat after calling him "my little man." I know that in his world he is a regular-sized man.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
The orcs in Jackson's Lord of the Rings trilogy are the high water mark for practical creature makeup and they haven't been equaled since.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
8 months
I just now learned what Roko's Basilisk is and it is just overwhelmingly stupid. What a nothing of a thought experiment.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
You can't reason with these people. They are delighting in their own deranged bad faith shit. They're doing "stop hitting yourself" with murder.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
"Characters can't consent to you watching them have sex" yes and my fucking alarm clock can't consent to being set to blare RIDING DIRTY whenever I want it to. That is the nature of the inanimate.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
Remember when Facebook told a massive, systematic lie about how popular videos hosted on its platform were compared to its text posts?
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
nobody who has ever fucked says any of this shit
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
if you experience extreme traumatic distress while reading fiction and cannot restrain yourself from venting those emotions at the fiction's creator, i have bad news for you about who in this scenario is an unsafe person who can't be trusted with grown-up art.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
You don't have to cling to opinions you didn't form yourself. You don't have to hate Fight Club or Catcher in the Rye or be scornful about the Beatles. It's insanely boring. I am trying to do you a favor.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
"The McElroy brothers? Don't -- my god -- don't trouble me with that. Sexless fraternity dropouts failing their way upward with a string of projects one might charitably describe as a sort of 'Blue's Clues' aimed at a generation of young adults terrified of their own genitalia."
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
Rowling is remaking her books primarily or solely because so much of the original cast has come out against her gender nazi bullshit. It's a whole fucking exercise in laundering her public reputation, a big bet, and it is not going to fucking work.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
You want to see what cis solidarity with trans people means, this is it. I am so deeply moved by the depth of sacrifice on display here.
@SawyerHackett
Sawyer Hackett
2 years
The Texas Department of Family and Protective Services is in a full-blown crisis. Nearly 2,300 employees have quit, many citing Greg Abbott’s politicization of the office such as the investigation of parents of trans kids.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
stop fucking calling art "content"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
6 years
my chupacabra don't my chupacabra don't my chupacabra don't want none unless you got goats, hon
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
7 months
The billionaire Howard Shultz doxxed thousands of Starbucks Workers Union members to right-wing maniacs and bloodthirsty Zionists because one person in the union tweeted "Solidarity with Palestine".
@ojchamber
OJC Jewish Chamber
7 months
Howard Shultz and Starbucks Corporate team work together with Orthodox Jewish Chamber of Commerce to identify Union owned Stores and take legal action on Its support of Hamas." …
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
Dr. Who is like "what if there were six million episodes of The Magic School Bus and adults were deadly serious about it"
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
I knew one of them would do this eventually, and I am so profoundly full of grief and rage right now
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
7 months
For the love of God, watch SCAVENGERS REIGN on Max.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
She literally died
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
Never in my life thought I would defend the Dr. Who guy against criticism, but Matt Smith's weird face rules. Being weird-looking is a powerful tool for any actor, and only people who are Marvel-poisoned by movies full of sanded-down catalog models would say otherwise.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
3 years
by getting divorced Graham Linehan has finally succeeded in improving a cis woman's life
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
1 year
RIP Ray Stevenson, whose turn as Titus Pullo on ROME is one of the greatest effortlessly charming performances of TV's golden age. A warm guy, by all accounts, and a serious craftsman. He'll be sorely missed.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
Saw the "I thought my partner was about to propose, but instead she came out as a trans woman" piece and all I have to say is that if you can write like that about someone you love, your love is rancid garbage she's better off without.
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
2 years
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Gretchen Felker-Martin
7 months
Cowards. Groveling moral weaklings. Eleven obsessive fascist weirdos are responsible for over 60% of book ban requests, and that was enough to make this company fold up like wet paper.
@Scholastic
Scholastic
7 months
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