Again. Sexual assault is hardly ever a man hiding in a bush or an alley. It’s a friend’s brother, a uncle, a “mentor”, a dad, a coworker, It’s y’alls homeboys. It was a guy I was dating who thought he’d waited long enough.
I don’t agree. Ppl think being healed equals unbothered. Being healed is being emotionally mature enough to recognize when things are bothering you and strong enough to walk away from anything that doesn’t serve you.
I’m constantly reminding myself that in order to step into the life I want I have to reject the things I don’t want. I have to reject offers of romance that aren’t what I need fully. Reject friendships that don’t push me forward. Most importantly reject the spirit of fear.
Far too often when women choose to open up about being abused emotionally, sexually, or physically by a man many ppl simply say “date better men”. Women cannot date their way out of misogyny and patriarchy.
If you admire something about someone you should tell them. You never know how hard they’re working or what they’re going through. You can make their whole day.
I dated a man for 3 months who never complimented me. I told him it bothers me and then he would occasionally give me forced compliments. Now he’s moved and he dms everyday telling me I’m beautiful or fine. I know it’s just to keep the door open. It’s wack.
If you see this it’s not your fault. You are not broken or damaged. A part of your being wasn’t stolen. You are whole. You are still powerful and precious. Still worthy of love and all things good. Still loved by God.
I would just like to say that months ago I reached out/went to a model call for a few brands. Those same brands have now contacted me for collabs paying 4 times the amount. A job I applied for in the fashion industry now wants to work with me. Wow. Look at God and his timing.
Dear men, it’s okay to admit that you have been complicit in rape culture. That you now completely understand the abhorrent effects of sexism, and will no longer stay silent. That you are not only apologetic but want to be an active ally.