Hugh Laurie @hughlaurie Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

1 year

Bailey has quit the scene, just shy of his 15th birthday. He wasn’t an athlete or a radical thinker, but he was a gentleman, through and through.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

I hope it’s OK to spout memories: I used to ride with Robbie Coltrane between Manchester and London in his sort-of-restored MGA. I’d roll him cigarettes while he discoursed on the ways of the world, and I don’t think I’ve ever laughed or learned so much in my life.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

When this is over, what say we all pitch in and buy health care workers, couriers, hauliers, farmers, millers, grocers, bakers, sewage workers, power workers, teachers, fire fighters and police officers a bottle of something?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

I can't speak for House, obviously - no one's written clever words for me to say - but I'm pretty sure he'd tell you it's not a matter of 'solving' Covid. This is an epidemic, not a diagnostic problem. We solve it together by staying apart.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

5 years

Stanley C. Brown departed this earth last night after 17 years. He was the dearest, gentlest, daftest, handsomest companion anyone could hope for. It was a privilege.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

I don’t know enough about the rail dispute. I only observe that RMT’s Mick Lynch cleaned up every single media picador who tried their luck today.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

No no no. A 1% pay rise for nurses will not do.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

Is there anything more deserving of protest than a plan to infringe the right to protest?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

The sun came out for 7 minutes. People stood in the street, staring at it like it was Halley’s comet. Dogs howled, children wept.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

1 year

Thank you for all the condolences and shared experiences. A lot of dog-shaped holes in the universe.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

For every hour we spend agonising over societal crimes of the past, we should probably allow a minute or two to wonder what we're doing now that will be similarly condemned a hundred years hence. Climate, obviously; animal rights, likewise. What else?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

I’m sure lots of people have said this already - I just haven’t seen it anywhere - but thank you to all the scientists, researchers, administrators, technicians, logisticians for bringing this extraordinary vaccine into existence.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Calls to UK Domestic Abuse Helplines have more than doubled since the lockdown. Victims should know that if they are in danger, they can dial 999, then press 55 and remain silent. Police will know that the caller is in danger and cannot speak. Spread this wide.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

It’s around this time of year that I like to wish people happy new year

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

The future is bright. Unfortunately, that’s not where we’re headed.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

5 years

Jacob Rees-Mogg lolling horizontally on the front bench during tonight’s emergency debate is as insolent and insufferable as anything I’ve seen.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

I fear 253-213 may now have burned into my TV screen and will be faintly visible during the cricket next year.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

If it were up to me - which, oddly, it weren’t - I would put @carolecadwalla on the next £20 note.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Now if Arsenal can just hold it together for the last 35 games

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

8 years

Best of three?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

There’s nothing quite like an English summer. Except perhaps an English winter. That’s pretty close.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Let trumpets sound and flags unfurl for the birthday of @stephenfry - the best colleague a colleague could have!!

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Chin up, everybody. This will work. However irksome it is for us, it's much worse for the virus. Picture the little bugger with its nose against the window, whining.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Asking people to pay for a thing that only has value because it can’t be paid for is quite a Banksy move.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

It may be time to appoint a proper Home Secretary.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

5 years

Olivia Colman, you beauty!!!

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

7 years

Will there be a separate news conference for the verbs?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

We got used to foreign football managers pretty easily. Why not Merkel for PM?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

7 years

I'm sure everybody feels unappreciated from time to time. But imagine being the climate.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

8 years

I don't how to say this, or even be, except baldly: I am getting a star on Hollywood Blvd this Tuesday 25th at 11.30 am.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

What chance does a virus stand against this?

NHS Million

@NHSMillion

4 years

The spirit of NHS staff is absolutely astonishing ❤️ Please RT if you’re proud. WE WILL BEAT THIS!

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Christ

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

6 years

Have a lovely Christmas, world - and thank you to all the people who aren't having one because they're looking after things that allow the rest of us to have one

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

You are not the people. You are some people.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 months

Happy New Year to all. Eat as well as you can, try not to wear black, and smile at strangers.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

10 years

Choripan. Sensational. You can hear your arteries closing like branches of Blockbuster.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

I find the injunction ‘think for yourself' very stirring - until I remember that I could never have conceived of 99% of the concepts I rely on every day to survive. I’m extremely grateful to those who have thought for me.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

I don’t particularly fear death, but I do fear particular deaths - being cut in half by a Foxtons To Let sign is not the way to go. Please be careful out there.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

When a forecast says 10% rain, does it mean 10% chance that it will rain at all, or 100% that it will rain for 10% of the day? Asking for an idiot.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Requiring Commonwealth ex-servicemen to pay thousands in visa fees to remain in the country they risked their lives for seems about as wrong as a thing can get. What am I missing?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

M’colleague has noticed that, besides the usual court circular of saints, battles, dance crazes etc, today is the 30th anniversary of Jeeves and Wooster. I wish him, and anyone who enjoyed it half as much as we did, tinkerty tonk.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

5 years

Liverpool

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

5 months

Happy Christmas everyone, in spite of it all!

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

So we gave ourselves a Supreme Court, turned ministries into departments, gave the army a ‘Ranger’ battalion and now have a lovely blue press briefing room. What other acts of slobbering imitation can we stoop to?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

8 years

I hate this referendum, for turning a question of unfathomable complexity into Lord of the Flies.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Apparently more tank than think.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 months

Sublime

Rosie Holt

@RosieisaHolt

4 months

MP blames Toby Jones & ITV for not making #PostOfficeScandal drama sooner.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Dogs obviously recognise other dogs as belonging to the same species, but do they recognise breeds? I can’t remember ever seeing gangs of Dachshunds naturally congregating on street corners to discuss their lived experience.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

The funniest, cleverest, kindest of men.

Barbara Vitali

@barbaravitali2

2 years

Happy Birthday to #RobertSeanLeonard February 28,1969 #HouseMD @hughlaurie #Driven #FallingSkies

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

Under the PCS&C Bill, a person causing “serious annoyance, distress or inconvenience” may be imprisoned for 10 years. Also, anyone who is mean, or doesn’t pass the parcel, or eats too much cake.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

Thank you for all the lovely birthday wishes. I’m going to do this more often.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 months

@Dreamduality I had hoped to show a little more range, but there we are.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Thanks to those who’ve taken the trouble to tell me that decent pay and conditions for essential workers might be preferable to a bottle of something. Bigger thanks to those who knew that’s what I meant.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Thank you, one and all, for lovely birthday wishes.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

That’s it then. No more lacerating observations about dogs and the weather.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

Trying to find a positive idea: the government nominates a week-long Bank Holiday to make up for this bleak winter. We have carols, mince pies and Die Hard among the daffodils.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Pathetic

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

10 months

I am ageing a year with every run and a decade with every wicket.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 months

@abzartx1 Hugely flattering, Abi, thank you. But please don’t put a lot of work into the top of the hair. I haven’t.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

7 years

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

Happy birthday to m’colleague @stephenfry running rings around the sun

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

5 years

Walk on, LFC, walk on

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

I've been corrected by an expert: dial 999, and wait until you're prompted by the operator before you press 55. I'm sorry for the mistake. If it's any comfort, the only time I've ever witnessed a situation like this, the police response was exemplary. #YouAreNotAlone

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 months

Steve Wright was so damn good.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

My hands may be wearing away faster than the soap.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

What the actual dickens

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Let me try this again. I’m peppering my speech with rhetorical questions. Why? Because I’ve been watching CNN for 3 straight days.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

21 gun salute for Charlie Watts.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

7 years

Though we're apart, you're a part of me still...

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

2021 is crowning. Saint or serial killer? Let’s love it anyway. Happy new year!!

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

5 years

Thanks, Tim. I take your point. But reconsidering a decision isn't always terrible, is it? If it were, we'd still be trying to grow peanuts in Tanzania, Lance Armstrong would have won the Tour de France seven times, and the Birmingham Six would still be in prison.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

9 years

Bloody hell it's happened! @ElliottGSpencer has made an honest man of m'col. Love and happiness to all!!

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

8 years

Celebrated my birthday with a traditional Donald Trump piñata. Hecho con amor.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

7 years

Why have a solar eclipse on a Monday? It just makes no sense.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Hit the ground? Hit the ground with a team of advisers who can’t understand the meaning of the words they’ve written, or why the word ‘running’ (if you insist on adopting pathetic US tufspeak) is a blindingly stupid omission? FUCK.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

Up early this morning to the sweetest music. The hum of bees.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Thank you for all the lovely birthday wishes. Especially the really lovely ones. Cake!

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

I May Destroy You is phenomenal.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

9 years

Vive la France

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

The backlash to clapping has arrived, as reliably as a Swiss commuter train, but I will never stop doing it. Sanctimony butters very few parsnips. Thank you NHS.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

Johnson has just referred to Starmer as ‘Captain Crasheroonie Snoozefest’. A peak of witlessness few have reached without oxygen.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

I do believe spring flashed an ankle in London today. Clear blue sky, birdsong, occasional spray of daffodils, fewer people barrelling along the pavement as if they’re in a Jason Bourne film. Lovely.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

How about MILTs instead? Mothers I’d Like to Thank.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

6 months

I’m out of the office until the best regain their conviction and the worst empty themselves of their passionate intensity.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

11 months

Thank you for lovely birthday messages, cakes, balloons, trinkets, gadgets, poems, ballads, Arab stallions, and islands of manageable size. You are all very kind.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

10 years

Yes I suppose it's odd that atheists sometimes say Jesus, and Oh My God. But odder than the religious saying "let's be reasonable"?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

But who broke it?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

Very honoured to have been given command of a frigate in the Agatha Christie fleet. Why Didn’t They Ask Evans? starts shooting in June, which is not as far away as I’d like. If you’re the owner of a pre-war Bentley, expect a phone call.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

What a game of cricket. It doesn't solve anything, cure anything, make anything go away - but what a game of cricket.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

After a night of CNN, I’m going to make some toast. Why? Because I’m hungry.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

1 year

The Arts Council withdrawing funding from ENO unless they move north seems like a pretty solid example of levelling down. Up would be to build and fund another ENO in Manchester, wouldn’t it?

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

3 years

Always a relief when more than one player misses. Shared sorrow.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

2 years

You are too modest, DB - but yes, this is fucking magnificent.

Danny Baker

@prodnose

2 years

I am pretty good on the radio. I have 20-odd awards for it. But I feel like putting them all in a cab to @mrjamesob so he can use them as boot scrapers. The absolute maestro.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Clapping the clapping. So moving.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

5 years

‘Time is running out’, we’re told. Over and over again. In spite of the fact that running out is pretty much the only thing time ever does or is equipped to do.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

10 years

I'd boycott Russian goods if I could think of a single thing they made besides the rest of the world depressed.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

8 years

I wouldn't dream of telling you how to vote Remain.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

8 years

Congratulations exiters. Reverse is across and down, easy on the clutch.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Five minutes. Just five minutes alone in a room with the inventor of the modern bicycle pump.

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Hugh Laurie

@hughlaurie

4 years

Avenue 5 has been renewed for a second season. Chuffed.

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