Joel @coolboy_joel Twitter profile

Pinned Tweet

Joel

@coolboy_joel

20 hours

Updated list of upcoming shows Get tix from link -

1

0

1

Last Seen Profiles

@NYCSchoolsD25

@jandakembangstw

@zarrispeleo

@AnciliaInc

@miladymaker

@mv_wood_jp

@matthew_reese58

@katex

@yonkoujean

@AlGhadeer_m

@_tsukuyxmi

@FMGSuite

@WeagleEpping

@diloyunu

@sd_mnsr

@DoodlesbyZach

@aerithisbaby

@ptpt_o0

@orotsukashii

@myNSFAS

@MonsKrabbe

@AishaMuhammadK5

@shiyuudou_panda

@Advokaate_ZA

@mspolisci09

@shya_2

@MobileHarv

@CriollosCaguas

@sandranursing

@Swifty_PACT

@WinterKingSimon

@Hai_yagi

@crocrubies

@birisoficial

@ftium4

@YShiblog

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I wish I could play chess as good as @ReheSamay

85

41

2K

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

It was lovely following the Skilling Open. Always a treat when the winner isn't the favorite.

10

21

2K

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

What an evening this might turn out to be if I win #COB3 and Tottenham beat City.

43

16

1K

Joel

@coolboy_joel

1 year

16

3

1K

Joel

@coolboy_joel

9 years

Today earphones have replaced hats. You take them off only when you meet someone you have respect for.

11

1K

926

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

COB is an event where Samay helps me convert my black money into white.

Samay Raina

@ReheSamay

3 years

Comedians on Board: All Stars from 22nd of this month. Spread the word. ❤️🔥🔥🔥

95

212

5K

8

10

927

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Looking at kids searching for their cricket ball that's gone missing in the shrubs. If my ball goes missing, I just buy new one because I have one lakh rupees. #COB3

16

9

912

Joel

@coolboy_joel

5 years

if one of the best goalkeepers of all time can get a heart attack while being match fit, then i don't think changing to saffola can save me

Iker Casillas

@IkerCasillas

5 years

Todo controlado por aquí, un susto grande pero con las fuerzas intactas. Muchísimas gracias a todos por los mensajes y el cariño 😃💪🏼

30K

116K

706K

5

265

870

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I never really got into Reddit until like a week ago but I am so surprised by the average person's contribution on the site. Like it probably has the smartest and most open minded people.

14

15

821

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

All those who judged tiktok but are now making Instagram Reels. I see you. I see everything.

7

37

693

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

I know I have only 11 followers on twitter but this is my favourite platform and I appreciate all of those 3 likes everyday.

20

28

695

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

@ReheSamay geeli puppy to you

4

1

617

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Why do chess players still write moves while playing?

33

14

566

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Please don't call me arrogant because what I'm saying is true.

9

5

535

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Just showed everyone how to not play poker.

17

5

502

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I’m falling for literally every Brand’s April Fools joke this is a personal low.

9

6

503

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Happy Birthday @adhibanchess 🤠.

3

480

Joel

@coolboy_joel

2 years

As a kid I’ve at least thrown 5 thousand water balloons on random strangers from my building terrace. But I never threw on women, old uncle aunties, kids, people on phones, families, uniformed civilians. I was a shit kid but a principled shit kid.

14

9

480

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

Thank you so much. @adhibanchess see you in Goa.

Chess.com - India

@chesscom_in

4 years

BREAKING! Top-three winners of #COB3 1st Joel Dsouza @coolboy_joel 🥇 2nd Vaibhav Sethia @vaibhav_sethia 🥈 3rd Samay Raina @ReheSamay 🥉

7

46

887

4

1

472

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Ok gotta admit when my friends share my non famous comedian friends ka work, it feels nice.

1

2

437

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Deleted insta so using Twitter as stories

7

0

437

Joel

@coolboy_joel

5 years

Hi, I've been a writer on shows such as Son of Abish (2018) and Lakhon Mein Ek (2017). I have also written content for a few corporates. Willing to send complete profile/Credentials if you send me an email - joeldsouza261 @gmail .com Please. Give. Work. (RT if you can't hire)

16

584

406

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I was 1794 on like 2 days ago. Earlier today I was 1780. In the evening I had coffee and the caffeine hit got me so jittery my rating dropped to 1652. I gave away my queen like 5 times. I missed a mate in one and went on to lose the game. I'm upset.

20

3

413

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

The theme of my 2021 has been - “ok it’s mine now, there’s no way this is going to shit. Goes to complete shit.”

8

5

410

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Literally every other tweet/story/post is about requiring oxygen/meds/beds and still we could have the same PM next time. Absolute disheartening:

7

38

400

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Joe Root x Joe Root = Joe

7

15

397

Joel

@coolboy_joel

2 years

I’m a proper adult so why do 11 boys playing football thousands of miles away bother me so much? I’m really really really sad man.

6

16

385

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I suffer from extreme high self esteem.

5

4

377

Joel

@coolboy_joel

2 years

Parents loaning lakhs of rupees for their kids to go abroad and shoot reels disguised as masters 😭😭😭.

2

12

380

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I hate rich kids because i so badly want to be one. Fuck this work for your own money life. I want to sit in my house 365 days straight and swipe my father’s card. There’s no pride in self worth. It’s all a myth. I want a Bentley.

6

30

384

Joel

@coolboy_joel

2 years

3 weeks ago I was out at some club wearing my Spurs T-shirt when one drunk guy wearing an arsenal jersey comes and yells “Fuck offffff No champions league for you London is Red”. First of all brother, we are in Khar West. Second of all, I hope you’re thinking of me today.

12

13

375

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Need oxygen concentrator for a senior citizen in my building who’s covid positive . Please DM me. Very urgent. Location - Mumbai.

21

213

375

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

This generation has actually normalised buying 10 thousand rupees shoes.

7

16

377

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

You get the haircut you want exactly before a haircut.

3

12

362

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Can't believe Wesley So let that slide Jesus Christ.

1

0

336

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Rap is just the best genre of music. Nothing even comes close.

20

19

339

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I am floored by @DavidHowellGM 's commentary during the Skilling Open. It's beyond my comprehension the flair he is able to bring in real time with practicality in such high level games. Top top level.

4

302

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

@adhibanchess @ReheSamay @vaibhav_sethia Adhiban I made you 1 lakh rupees. I deserve a follow back at least

2

0

304

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I think Dubov is my favorite chess player right now. Rooting for him in this tournament.

4

5

296

Joel

@coolboy_joel

2 years

Why’s it that checking my account balance is simpler on google pay than my bank’s app?

9

7

299

Joel

@coolboy_joel

2 years

So when are South Bombay kids doing their protest against US gun laws? The world is waiting for the rally at Marine Drive.

1

12

287

Joel

@coolboy_joel

6 months

Thanks to @SpursOfficial @Spurs_India for the jersey. Would never have imagined a gift from the club given to me by the legends themselvesss!!!!! Unreallll.

8

287

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH

Srinath Narayanan

@srinathchess

3 years

Watching #SkillingOpen after three days of #COB3 is like coming out of a dark room and being exposed to blinding sunlight :P

16

20

1K

0

2

284

Joel

@coolboy_joel

2 years

@TheBanat @zomato I think we can all guess who is going to reply to this tweet from zomato’s account

1

4

283

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I just reached 5000 followers on twitter. This is solid because I absolutely don't care what I say here.

3

1

276

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

How are parents spending tens of lakhs for their children's dumb undergrad degree in India???

5

4

271

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Saw a couple make out at a park. Mumbai is back.

5

6

266

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I’m not comfortable with people having fun.

2

13

270

Joel

@coolboy_joel

5 years

@kunalkamra88 Return phone back to kamra

1

6

247

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

My crush still taking 6 hours to reply during this quarantine. Have no option but to break up with her.

4

21

263

Joel

@coolboy_joel

5 months

RTing so the algorithm pushes all of the drama on my TL.

Ian Nepomniachtchi

@lachesisq

5 months

Dear @FIDE_chess and organisers of the Championship! As known, all animals are equal, but some are more equal than others. Is it fair to provide @MagnusCarlsen a personal lounge where he can rest and prepare to the game using a laptop, while nobody else has such an opportunity?

656

473

8K

2

4

262

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

Cyclone is our answer to locusts. Abhi aao na benchod khet khaane.

1

13

257

Joel

@coolboy_joel

6 years

Mumbai's drainage system is evaporattion.

2

68

250

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Sad that LG gonna stop making mobile phones. I still have my old Nexus 5 somewhere in the drawer. That phone was full heart.

5

256

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

They fired my gym trainer who I believed was my fitness soul mate and I’m absolutely shattered.

4

1

253

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

An Indian guy in Goa just said "Let's get some sun". Lavde.

4

2

251

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Mathew Wade took away one video away from Shoaib Akhtar’s channel 😭😭😭.

5

10

240

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

England bhai, Kohinoor rakh lo bus thoda vaccine de do.

1

6

240

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

You have to be a complete mad man to want a son.

7

2

237

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

My father couldn't go to church because of the shut down so now he's watching mass on YouTube. He's on his 4th mass ever since. My dad's literally binge watching mass.

4

23

231

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

IPL suspended. So sure many more players must have tested positive.

2

3

231

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I'm yet to meet a single person this year who's not popular.

9

1

226

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Somewhere around this week I complete 5 years in stand up. For those looking to start, only one advice - don't listen to senior comics. 🤣🤣🤣

5

1

228

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

One legged Vihari > Two legged Vihari.

1

3

227

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

How is everyone on Twitter shocked about every other thing?

6

7

221

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Don’t doubt Dubov.

4

218

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I don’t think I’ve done anything in the last 6 months. But I also don’t think I’ve done anything in the last 24 years. So it should be okay.

1

8

219

Joel

@coolboy_joel

5 years

Work hard from winter to summer to give all the money to cab companies in monsoon.

0

35

217

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Yaar why don’t I belong to a wealthy family. Why do I have to work?

4

3

218

Joel

@coolboy_joel

2 years

Bad dreams are fine. Dreams of pleasant scenarios which will never ever happen are the worst.

4

12

223

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Now that I have some crypto, can someone tell me the thumb rules of managing crypto? I’m a complete noob.

24

1

218

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

❤

chess24

@chess24com

3 years

Teimour Radjabov had barely shown a hint of emotion during the #AirthingsMasters , but this is what it meant to him to win it! #c24live #ChessChamps

137

624

4K

2

1

218

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Today my mother made methi ka ladoo. The audacity.

4

0

217

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

Everyone: What about China attacks on border? What about petrol-diesel rates? What about failing health infrastructure? What about deaths under police custody? PM: Take 1 KG chana.

17

50

211

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

@ReheSamay @TwitterIndia @NishantStanwar @randomchikibum @adg_5 @therahuldua @suri_nishant @vaibhav_sethia @TheSkyGupta @SonaliThakker @sumitsourav001 @LifeOfPaaji @yahya_bootwala @AishwaryaMrj @RandomVarun @Aravind_SA @PrashastiSingh @NivPrakasam @abishmathew time has come to reduce internet from fiber optic to BSNL

1

215

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Queen's Gambit gets so cringe at times.

5

1

212

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I am considering buying the iphone 11. Is it a good phone? Also what alternatives do ya'll suggest?

40

1

211

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Sadness just makes every song better.

5

11

209

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

My left AirPod fell into soup for one second and it’s volume has gone down significantly. Does anybody know any fixes pls fast.

36

0

208

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Congrats @ArjunErigaisi .

1

3

207

Joel

@coolboy_joel

11 months

Twitter’s best tweets are made by people who have less than 100 followers.

7

8

200

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Please don’t comment on my hinge profile with Comicstaan references. It’s so cringe. Unless you’re really pretty then do whatever.

2

201

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

What an end to the Tata Steel. Foreest literally pulled a Leicester.

5

2

206

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I miss walking out of the green room when my least favourite comedian would enter.

5

1

201

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Forgot to take my blanket to the train. Now using laptop on chest to keep warm.

7

3

197

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Did 300 crunches today. Need haters now so I can ask them to fuck off.

6

3

194

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Artemiev wow.

7

3

193

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Everyone should stop pretending that they care about the euros.

4

3

190

Joel

@coolboy_joel

5 years

I don't know what upbringing ya'll had but I don't cheat on my crush.

1

15

187

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

@Deekshapatelk @ReheSamay going through a tough phase

1

0

189

Joel

@coolboy_joel

4 years

The guilt of unproductivity is going to ruin my life.

2

31

184

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

This is a lie.

Samay Raina

@ReheSamay

3 years

@MeepMeep_14 It was just a gag to make audience curious. I play these games with y'all sometimes just to add flavour. He had texted me nothing shocking. I tricked you lol

1

0

174

6

0

185

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Tottenham Hotspur #COB5 .

16

2

185

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

My crypto research is mostly ‘andar se feeling aa rahi Hai.’

2

5

182

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I have not had any motivation to do anything since 2017.

5

6

181

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Watching comedy being discussed is so boring. 🤮🤮🤮

6

0

178

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Hello Twitter. Pls entertain me for one hour till I reach my house.

8

0

183

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I literally sucked out the the soup from it and now they’re working fine. 😭😭😭

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

My left AirPod fell into soup for one second and it’s volume has gone down significantly. Does anybody know any fixes pls fast.

36

0

208

10

2

180

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

I’m fully vaccinated.

8

0

179

Joel

@coolboy_joel

3 years

Abhi Rauf apne bache 6 ball Hasan Ali par phekega.

1

14

177