Chelsea Peretti @chelseaperetti Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@SCSTATE1896

@_ico0

@BertrandMarquet

@WeChargeCom

@cheolitoq

@AWashenko

@SAUDIMOTORSPORT

@tehavd

@TimGettys

@sezginkrtal

@Mizar_art_

@nishio

@claudioYPF

@EisenmannDayten

@thereal_Rocco

@CaptainMattASMR

@WandleEYHub

@polbots

@Fatih_Cintimar

@hankcny

@Techecho_Ar

@TheWilderSide

@Noolingcameback

@hamzahhofficial

@IAmLaikk

@NyriaTamare

@Netcraft

@BunieTheFirst

@kickitupanacho

@_wlww

@Freshyman889

@munds

@C_Staxxz

@pasutri_padang

@OddBrawlstars

@billabbottHC

Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

...thus proving that squats and push-ups can be done anywhere...?

WFLA NEWS

@WFLA

4 years

WATCH: Protesters calling for gyms to reopen in Florida are doing squats and push-ups outside the Clearwater courthouse #Florida #COVID19

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

Vote like a bunch of school children were shot and a bunch of other children were put into camps indefinitely bc they werent white and like a journalist was murdered and like you are being lied to daily by rich liars who harass / assault women & wont renounce white supremacy

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

2 years

nate lets have a chat babe

elliot

@maygrantnash

2 years

i literally don’t watch euphoria but get her in it and nate jacobs is done

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

WHY DOES EVERY ONLINE RECIPE BEGIN WITH A 40 PAGE ESSAY ABOUT SOMEONES HUSBAND DOG AND KIDS AND A BRISK WALK THEY TOOK IN THE FALL AND HOW THEY LOVE THE CHANGING OF THE LEAVES AND THEIR DOGS FAVORITE TREAT. GIMME THE RECIPE HON MY SCROLL FINGER HURTS

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

dont lie u did it bc shes hot

Tomi Lahren

@TomiLahren

4 years

I decided to dress up as the person who scares me most. The Democratic Dimwit Darling, socialist-loving, freedom-hating, former bartender herself @AOC

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

who did this

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

“PLEASE LISTEN TO SCIENTISTS ABOUT GLOBAL WARMING”

MELANIA TRUMP

@MELANIATRUMP

12 years

What is she thinking? http://t.co/rFufrgMb

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

thanks guys 😔✨🙏🏼

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

shoutout to every woman that goes to work and tries during periods miscarraiges hidden pregnancies menopause racism misogyny to continue to assert their worth and implement their vision

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

I can’t get over the concept that women birthed every man. So every misogynist was brought into the world from the labor of a woman. The hate really is mind blowing

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

3 years

just remembered how i cried when i had to cut a kid on chopped jr and they edited it out haahahahahahahaaaaaa 😩🥲

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

thats how i feel inside

marjorie ✧

@ameliasvancamp

5 years

@chelseaperetti you only match 73% with yourself??????

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

😂tinciest miniature paint roller. And 500 hours of labor later its going to say BLACK LIVES MATTER in black paint

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

Lil slow ass!!!!!!!!!!

Jordan Peele

@JordanPeele

5 years

Chelsea just beat our two year old son in a race.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

PRO LIFE PEOPLE SHOULD BE OUT IN BIG NUMBERS AND VERY VOCAL AGAINST TREATMENT OF CHILDREN BEING KEPT IN DEADLY SQUALOR BY OUR GOVT

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

vaccinations seem good

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

1 year

I love that this duo knows to protect & maintain the spa-like peacefulness of the target experience

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

B99 fans. Hiiiiiiiiiiii. Chelsea Peretti, here. I won't be doing a full season of Brooklyn Nine Nine in Season 6. But that doesn’t mean I won’t ever be back, winky face emoji, heart emoji. I want to thank you for the hours you spent watching Gina be Gina:

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

TEENS FOREVERRRRRRR

TheBrag.com

@TheBrag

6 years

Teen wins Gold at Olympics, despite sleeping in after Brooklyn Nine-Nine Netflix binge.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

in the pandemic u look at old pics like after a break up

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

re self hate: theres better people to hate

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

🙄did the police come arrest you and your writers? did twitter shut down your account? kay. then u had freedom of speech girl ppl just didnt like the monkey thing too much & it hit u in ur pocket$

Roseanne Barr

@therealroseanne

6 years

tomorrow please vote for freedom of speech!

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

whatever happened to the bermuda triangle - feel like it gets no play anymore?

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

Why does this feel so sad and romantic

AP Health & Science

@APHealthScience

5 years

NASA is giving silent Mars rover one last opportunity to respond before declaring it dead after 15 years.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

2 years

REALIZED BARS OF SOAP IN THE SHOWER ARE BETTER THAN ALL THE PLASTIC CONTAINER GEL AND FOAMS WE NOW HAVE!!! FAR SUPERIOR! RETURN TO SOAP!!!!!! sound off in the comments below

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

HAHA ANDRE IS A VERY SPECIAL SPIRIT AND OBVIOUS NATIONAL TREASURE W MOIST HANDS

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

I FEEL LIKE GETTING A TON OF ATTENTION FOR A TWEET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DONT LET ME DOWN!!!!! ACKNOWLEDGE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!! PLEASE please dont forget IM HERE! I EXIST! IM WITTY! FUN! SMART! I SEE THINGS JUST A LIIIIIIL DIFFERENTLY ALA SALVADOR DALI OR MONET!

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

3 years

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

imagine thats ur nurse and ur not a white person

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

I guess now is as good a time as any to announce: My legs have turned to holograms and @ChrisEvans has been helping me walk around

francesca

@msfrancescaaloe

5 years

Last night I dreamt that @ChrisEvans had to help @chelseaperetti walk around the grocery store because her legs were holograms and couldn’t support her. What does it mean???

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

#HappyNationalBestFriendsDay

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

How crazy that a U.S. team win is seen as a blow to the president of the united states

Sara Pearl

@skenigsberg

5 years

lmao @FoxNews just went live from a bar in France after the #USWNT win and people started shouting "Fuck Trump" on air😂😂

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

3 WOMEN AND 30 DUDES WHAT IS THIS A COMEDY CLUB LINEUP ?

Jim Acosta

@Acosta

5 years

Quite the snapshot of our world now... #G20summitOsaka

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

NBC TAKIN B99 OFFA FOXES HANDSIES BBBBBSSSSSSssss

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

If you’re a male comedian one thing you can do is tell men to shut the fuck up when they are saying hateful shit about women. & not go on podcasts that are racist & sexist you can also speak up for women getting attacked online for sticking up for themselves. Or....total silence.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

sending love to anyone holding a secret or private pain

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

hes a fucking racist end of story

Yashar Ali 🐘

@yashar

5 years

POTUS tells @AprilDRyan he will not apologize for taking out a full page ad calling for the men known as the Central Park Five to get the death penalty. He says people on “both sides” confessed. The men were exonerated via DNA evidence.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

THE IMAGE I POSTED ON IG THAT HAS SET THE HOME-ON-FRIDAY INTERNET ABLAZE

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

in all seriousness pat robertson ate my pussy last nite so he may have only weeks to live 😢😢

badly-drawn barbenheimer 🤯

@soapachu

4 years

Fear not everyone, Pat Robertson has worked out what caused the Coronavirus; oral sex! With women! Which they didn't have when he was younger!

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

It is genuinely hard for me to comprehend that the young people who have survived a school shooting seem to be repeatedly under attack for speaking out and taking action. They have been one of the most inspiring forces of these times which frequently feel dark and hopeless

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

3 years

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

3 years

my son is watching soul (again) and just told me my spark is eating 😑pls get me out of this house

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

feels irrelevant that it was male

New York Post

@nypost

5 years

A Florida man has admitted having sex with a male pony

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

Nothing does! I have a backyard set up like that and do it every morning and some evenings

Digitrekk

@DigiTrekk

4 years

What prevents you from doing this?

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

2 years

is it the roaring 20s yet

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

“Walmart does nothing after mass shooting”

HuffPost

@HuffPost

5 years

Walmart is temporarily taking down its violent video game displays following the El Paso and Dayton shootings. But it is continuing to sell firearms.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

7 years

When he said he grabs puss he disrespected women but you stuck around for that, huh old boy?

Vice President Mike Pence Archived

@VP45

7 years

I left today's Colts game because @POTUS and I will not dignify any event that disrespects our soldiers, our Flag, or our National Anthem.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

best tmz appearance (and how everyone should do it)

TMZ

@TMZ

6 years

"Trump's an EVIL PIECE OF S**T"

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

2 years

can u wear crocs to a wedding

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

3 years

a robust anthem

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

3 years

Addiction is not easy to deal with privately or publicly but I hold in tenderest affection anyone who is trying to change your pattern and find a safer and healthier and more connected life. PS it destroys families happy holidays everyone

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

IM ACTUALLY CONFUSED ! how

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

AT WHAT POINT IS KIM CANCELLED

Raw Story

@RawStory

6 years

Kim Kardashian: Child separations are ‘heartbreaking’ — but it’s ‘so crazy everyone doesn’t want’ Trump to ‘win’

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

2 years

this may sound crazy but whats a way to take it to the next level w lemons? i love lemon so much i want to go deeper

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

3 years

my son is crying bc he wants to be a flamingo “not a pretend one”

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

Ive never heard this Christian prayer before

Andrew—Author of America Rises On Substack—Wortman

@AmoneyResists

5 years

Newest video to surface of the Covington kids shows one of them yelling to a group of girls “IT’S NOT RAPE IF YOU ENJOY IT!” Fuck anyone who is still defending them. Catholic Schools in the south like Covington are incubators for vile racism and misogyny.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

i like warren & i like bernie i like warren more but ill be happy with either but also is it all rigged and going to be heavily influenced by misinformation campaigns and endless racism and fear of progress and climate denial and deep corruption and voter suppression etc? lmk

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

why did i cry

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

you guys dont worry! kim k will talk to trump and get this all sorted out asap!

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

I think its time for all women to stop faking orgasms lol

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

do we do gofund me for postal workers now? or are we still using that for basic healthcare

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

THE LORD SAID STFU AND SIT DOWN

Ivanka Trump

@IvankaTrump

4 years

“This is what the Lord said: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears. I will heal you.” 2 Kings 20:5

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

goin thru old pics

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

If we just push through these trying times climate change will wipe us out!

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

PEOPLES BABIES ARE BEING SHOT AT SCHOOL

The White House 45 Archived

@WhiteHouse45

6 years

#Laurel ? #Yanny ? Or...

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

my night time routine is sitting in a pitch black room looking at my phone for 4 hours

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

@Franklin_Graham As a Christian how do you believe the bible defines grab them by the pussy

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

I AM YOUR DAD

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

If kids are arguing and one picks up a stick, do you give all the other kids sticks too? No bitch you take the sticks away

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

i cant believe this woman is blaming black muslims for her bitch ass son

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

💔

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

Racism, covid19, climate change and what else? Im forgetting one

Travel + Leisure

@TravelLeisure

4 years

First Date Conversation: 4 Things Research Says You Should Talk About

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

You bring misery and suffering with your dumb pen and horseshit blazer!

Governor Kay Ivey

@GovernorKayIvey

5 years

Today, I signed into law the Alabama Human Life Protection Act. To the bill’s many supporters, this legislation stands as a powerful testament to Alabamians’ deeply held belief that every life is precious & that every life is a sacred gift from God.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

Ive never admired someone more

Turgut 🔻

@ItsSlyGuy

5 years

Irish man left a funny recording to be played at his funeral and I'm dying 😭

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

8 years

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

PEP TALK IN MIRROR TODAY

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

U know what spoils Thanksgiving dinner? Incarceration of ur loved ones, separating families, when ur child is shot at school, ignoring the full reality of American history, certain climate destruction, but yeah pass the gravy ✨✨✨heheheh I want uncle Logan to feel comfy

The Associated Press

@AP

4 years

Worried that impeachment talk could spoil Thanksgiving dinner? An etiquette coach suggests setting aside a room for such discussions and designating a calm relative as a moderator.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

Ooooo! Pumpkin Spice Lattes are juuuust around the corner ladies dont vote for trump 🥰💝

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

Then why did you delete so many of your tweets expressing your opinions?

Roseanne Barr

@therealroseanne

6 years

Diversity of Opinion is part of Diversity.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

IT IS TORTURE TO TAKE A BABY FROM HER OR HIS PARENTS. TORTURE FOR THE BABY AND FOR THE MOM AND DAD. AND WITH NO INFORMATION? NO TOYS? NO HUGS? IN CAGES? CRYING? NO ONE TO CHANGE DIAPERS? PURE CHILD ABUSE

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

I wud watch this photograph for hours

The Hollywood Reporter

@THR

5 years

"I would watch many hours of that. Many, many." Stephanie Beatriz ( @iamstephbeatz ) says she'd like to see a #BrooklynNineNine spinoff starring @chelseaperetti as Gina Linetti "and it would be called 'Gina Knows Best'"

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@chelseaperetti

5 years

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

Rape, harassment & assault are often approached as “womans issues” where boys and men are sidelined as silent victims. That @terrycrews is speaking out about this culture is a good thing and supporters need to be louder than those who chose to ridicule him for speaking his truth.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

HERES ALL THE INFORMATION I WANT TO GIVE A COMPANY WHEN I PURCHASE SOMETHING AT THEIR STORE: MONEY.

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

When u realize the person giving you a pep talk is also depressed

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

THIS TWEET FOR WOMEN WHO HAVE A TRUMP-LOVING HUSBAND BUT THEY KIND OF KNOW HE ISN’T A GOOD PERSON OR PRESIDENT: Vote how u believe in your heart - you know ur husband is wrong all the time about so much shit also he doesn’t need to know how u voted 🥰

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

⁦ @melissafumero ⁩

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

THIS TWEET FOR PEOPLE WHO WEAR BRAS ONLY u ever buy a lace bra and ur titties just bust out of it whenever u lean or bend or reach etc

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

crazy that u cud go vote biden in texas and save us all

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

ARE THERE ANY PRINTERS THAT ARE NOT LOW ON INK

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

THIS TWEET IS FOR PEOPLE WHO FEEL LIKE THEY CANT FUCKING TAKE THIS SHIT ANYMORE: visualize yourself on the other side - whatever that means to you - and hold onto that vision every day WE MUST WORK TOGETHER TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

6 years

⁦ @iamstephbeatz ⁩ 😍😍😍

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

4 years

i just started laughing thinking about The Stakeout ep of @nbcbrooklyn99 😂😂we all need those lists on our walls right about now. 👀one of my favorite eps

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

i just unfollowed the white house its like a weird crazy persons account

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

i truly feel like god doesnt want me to be in shape

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

2 years

my son told someone his favorite show is love is blind is that ok

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Chelsea Peretti

@chelseaperetti

5 years

“The child prisoners were happy”

Vice President Mike Pence Archived

@VP45

5 years

ignoring the excellent care being provided to families and children. Our great @CBP agents deserve better and the American people deserve the whole story from CNN!

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