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Alfie Moore - Comedy Profile
Alfie Moore - Comedy

@alfiemoore

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Comedy cop & corporate speaker. Writer and presenter of BBC Radio4 'It's A Fair Cop'. For bookings, gig list & Edinburgh visit:

England
Joined May 2010
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@alfiemoore
Alfie Moore - Comedy
5 days
Tonight's It's A Fair Cop: Not paying for stuff - that a crime? Well sometimes, maybe, sort of.. Drive off not paying for fuel - will the police get involved? Find out 6:30pm @BBCRadio4 - just time to get the kettle on. Woop! Woop!👮 (On @BBCSounds later)
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@alfiemoore
Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
I'm watching the Scottish First Ministers briefing on @SkyNews - The journos are asking clear sensible questions and getting straight answers back. It's a joy to watch and I have to say that the Scots are putting us to shame.
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@alfiemoore
Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
I'm absolutely delighted to announce that @BBCRadio4 have commissioned #itsafaircop Series 7 for 2022. Thank you so much for listening and giving positive feedback allowing my little adventure to continue 🙏x I'm dead giddy. Woop woop 👮🚓🐶 🚓
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
Expect my take will upset everyone: Hearing concluded stop search lawful- no allegations around race discrimination upheld. 2 cops sacked - if they did lie that's fair enough. When's the driver getting processed for speeding and failing to stop for police?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
If anyone is curious about my thoughts on the ongoing @LancsPolice major investigation, it's this: I reckon I'll leave them alone to let their professional detectives continue their enquiries.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
Delighted to say that @BBCRadio4 have ordered series 6 of It's A Fair Cop for spring 2021. Woop Woop 🚔👮😃
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@alfiemoore
Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
Let me be completely honest with you - if I got sent to a violent disorder in Scunthorpe and I could only take one officer to watch my back...
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
17 days
I've never had a satisfactory answer to this Q: If we genuinely want to depoliticise policing then why do we allow Police & Crime Commissioner candidates to be affiliated with a political party? Why don't we simply insist it's a politically independent post or don't apply?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 month
It's A Fair Cop is back tonight 6:30pm @BBCRadio4 with a brand new series 8 (I wanted to say 'season' but I wasn't quite cool enough) Tune in and see what sort of cop you'd make. Woop! Woop! 👮‍♂️🚓👮‍♂️🐶 Or catch it later @BBCSounds X
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
Shocking revelation @guardian - if you cut starting pay £4,000, make pension less favourable, insist on degree qualification, followed by a relentless cynical media campaign against police then you may struggle to attract good quality recruits - who knew?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
Met Barry Cryer some years ago at a BBC drinks thing. I didn't know anyone and was standing awkwardly alone with a glass of wine in my hand. Barry came over with a big smile, enthusiastically shook my hand and said "Hi I'm Barry and I really like your radio show". What a nice man
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 months
Well this has made my day🤣
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
PC Harper's widow is absolutely devastated that his killers are not convicted of murder and the very next morning we get this story criticising the police for initially charging the wrong man. Well done @BBCNews I can't think of anything more insensitive
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
Do this for a better police service: 1. Have enough cops to do the job effectively 2. Pay them well (then quality recruitment sorts itself) 3. Force media to give balanced police reporting 4. Double penalty for obstructing police 5. Double sentence for any cop convicted of crime
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
Just when you think it can't get any worse - another massive kicking for the police from all sides. There's no balance just relentless one-way traffic. This week I wonder how many good cops decided they'd had enough and time to change careers? When good cops leave everyone loses.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
11 months
Not one to complain but quick heads-up. Last week I stopped at Binley Woods Services on A46 where I filled up, grabbed a pastie & brew, before sauntering off. This week a £100 parking fine landed because I stayed over 30 mins. 30 minutes at services!😮
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
'I've got a 4 year old' is now officially a legal defence in law #DominicCummngs
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
Patsy I think your account has been hacked as I know that you're not the type to hold bigoted views against a group of people, the vast majority of whom you have never met and some of whom have laid down their life protecting others.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
I expect that today will be very challenging for our police, many of whom expected to be home but instead had their rest days cancelled and tasked with holding the line. I hope that any protests are peaceful and respectful and everyone returns to their families safe and well🙏
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
That's a rap for Series 7 of #itsafaircop - it's been a joy to make & the live @BBCRadio4 audiences have been as amazing as always. Thank you for listening and thanks to the Fair Cop top Team of @ingwilling @SamRussellComic Becky, James Robinson @JuliaAMcKenzie Until next time👋
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
I’m at a corporate lunch at Somerset County Cricket Club. I’ve a feeling I may not be who they think they’ve booked
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
Dear @BBCNWT @BBCNews , What about if we actually make this the criminal's fault rather than the police? What about: "Dangerous driver making off from scene of crime fails to stop for police before injuring innocent motorist"
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
To those out marching - please remember that you're not protesting against the police, you're protesting against a proposed Act of the UK Parliament sponsored by the Home Office. The cops are there to keep the peace and afterwards go home safe and sound to their own families.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
Enormous respect to those brave people in Russia who have been out protesting and telling the world that Putin doesn't speak for them 👏👏👏
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
On a briefly soppy note: It's been fantastic to get out gigging properly again in 2022. Thanks to @BBCRadio4 for letting me go again - series 7 was fab fun to make. Thank you to those that listened or came to a tour show - your support is very much appreciated & #HappyNewYear X🍾
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
So @Biker_Nigel sent me this 🤣🤣
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@alfiemoore
Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
Different day, same tweet. What a shameful reflection of our society the way some people are continuing to behave on social media on a day like this. Stop it and show some respect.
@alfiemoore
Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
If anyone is curious about my thoughts on the ongoing @LancsPolice major investigation, it's this: I reckon I'll leave them alone to let their professional detectives continue their enquiries.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
Here we go then and I'm rather excited that a brand new series of #itsafaircop starts tonight 6:30pm @BBCRadio4 Woop! Woop! 👮🚓🐶
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
Yesterday I had the honour of hosting the inaugural National PCSO Awards. Met some lovely people and delighted that some of those officers who are indisputably the backbone of UK Neighbourhood Policing got the recognition they deserve. Very well done to all the finalist 👏👏👏
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
9 days
Receptionist just checked me in at the hotel then looked me up and down and asked me for 'my card details' When I asked 'why?' seeing as I'd already paid for my room in advance she politely informed "it's in case you damage or steal anything"
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
Where did we go wrong when 100's of schools are facing closure, raw sewage is illegally pumped into our waterways and the country's 2nd largest city declares itself bankrupt, yet one of our highest circulating newspapers runs with the front page 'Schofield unfollows Willoughby'?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
Home Office guidance for London protests: Anyone offends you - blame the Met. Inclement weather - blame the Met. Any hate speech (protest groups or politicians) - blame the Met. If opposing group offers serious violence - wait for the Met to turn up and all turn on the Met. #BTM
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
I fully support the right to peaceful protest. Please remember the police are not there to stop you protesting. They're not representatives of the political classes they're ordinary working class people simply trying to keep people safe by maintaining public order. #londonprotest
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
19 days
Tonight 'It's A Fair Cop' 6:30pm @BBCRadio4 - guess who's back? Only Zeus!!!🐶 This week his top dog status is in jeopardy...
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
We're just putting a team together to go and arrest Putin
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
When I joined the police it was pretty standard in hours of darkness frontline cops would be double-crewed. This was much better for public reassurance, evidential corroboration and officer safety. Years of increased demand and reduced budgets ended this practice - bring it back?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
Very excited to announce that the brand new Series 7 of #itsafaircop starts 6:30pm on Monday 3rd Oct 2022. Woop! Woop! 👮🚓🐶👮
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
Police Officer morale is subdued at the moment. Many feel undervalued and disrespected. Some have not had a weekend with their family all month. Instead they're trying to ensure protests are peaceful, attendees are safe, their voices heard Smile. Be respectful. Be nice. Be kind x
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
Like everyone else I was deeply saddened by yesterday's news. Difficult not to feel angry about how a tiny minority of haters & some of our insensitive clickbait driven media responded. Instead I applied online to be a police volunteer- why don't you join me? #DontLetTheHatersWin
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
Yo people it’s good to be challenged and I like respectful interaction and differing views. However I’m a bit old school so rude, nasty or aggressive stuff not really my bag and not welcome on my threads. Thanks 🙏 x
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
Congratulations to the Moon Under Water Wigan for the smallest portion of peas world record attempt 👏👏
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
Newsflash: All police leave cancelled for 21st June 2021
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 month
My fav bit 'Asked if "misgendering" someone or making a comment about their religion would be a crime the minister replied 'This will be up to Police Scotland Police Scotland to determine'🤣 & just like that the unworkable is out of our tray & into yours👍
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
11 months
Right, deep breath. First of all are you ok? Hope so. Feels very strange indeed to be here without Boris. I imagine you've been feeling a lot like I have - shaken, troubled, let down after we gave love and support to someone who wasn't telling the truth, then decided to step down
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
5 years ago I made @BBCRadio4 show about dealing with inappropriate behaviour and sexual harassment in the workplace. It seems to be aging quite well and available @BBCSounds on below link if you fancy a listen.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
Nice to see #Jesus trending on twitter. A good effort considering he only used to have 12 followers
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
22 days
Adam Crozier, former Post Office CEO and Adam Cook, former Managing Director both give evidence and confirm that they didn't know that the Post Office handled mail or delivered letters as no one had ever told them.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
I’m having a lovely fun time at the seaside
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 months
Hope Santa has been kind to you. I'm very excited that the It's A Fair Cop Christmas Special will be on air 6:30pm tonight @BBCRadio4 do tune in if you've half an hour to spare- should be a good 'un Woop! Woop! 🎅🐶👮🚔
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
You can say that again. I bet every decent cop in the country is thinking 'minimum 32 years - not long enough'
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
"Named police officer for every victim", Boris vows. I think it's lovely that the party who closed over half the police stations in the country want you to have a local crime contact on hand.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
7 months
Soon after starting stand-up I was at a tiny comedy club above Kayal restaurant in Leic as a 10 min open spot. Pre tv Rhod was the pro closer. Afterwards he asked me what my day job was & when I told him a cop he said you ought to talk about that on stage.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
26 days
It's A Fair Cop about to start @BBCRadio4 and after that @BBCSounds - Tonight's ep how to deal with a very angry man.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
Newsflash: Apparently if you relentlessly defund the Criminal Justice System for ten years and close 51% of Magistrates' Courts there may be consequences.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
That's all from series 6 #itsafaircop Thanks to the top team of @ingwilling @bevtagg & producer Richard Morris. And of course the brill @BBCRadio4 techie team who made a testing challenge look easy Biggest thanks to those who took time out to listen it's very much appreciated👏👏
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 months
It's a good job that you need a reasonable level of intelligence and critical thinking to be an MP and you don't just have knee-jerk attention seeking responses to very obvious clickbait...
@ReasonableCop
ReasonableCop
3 months
I kept the receipts on this one:-
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
Met Professional Standards Dept quickly concluded no wrong doing. The then Commissioner publicly defended officer's actions. IOPC draw the exact opposite conclusion. Additional evidence aside, big Q is: How can the assessment of police behaviour be so strikingly polar opposite?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
Stop took place July 2020 with extensive video footage. What's the justification for taking 3 yrs 2 months to reach the decision to hold misconduct hearings? Can't believe the file sat in someone's tray gathering dust so must be a good reason- any offers?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
9 months
Just to answer some obv Q's: No they didn't find me wandering around looking vulnerable Yes they gave me a car blanket for my lap No they'd never heard of Radio 4 Yes they were an impressively professional top team Yes they fed me Werther's Originals Yes I was in bed by 9.30pm
@tvp_mk
TVP Milton Keynes
9 months
This evening the South Neighbourhood team gained an extra crewmate as @alfiemoore joined us for a shift. As well as attending incidents and patrolling south MK, we chatted about what we're to tackle knife crime, protect domestic abuse victims and dismantle drug lines.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
I love this update from the BBC News website informing us that Khalife hasn't managed to escape again yet.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 months
Excellent work from these very brave @metpoliceuk undercover officers and their team👏👏👏
@metpoliceuk
Metropolitan Police
4 months
Over the course of 7 months there has been a sharp rise in high-value watch robberies in central London worth £4 million. Undercover officers set out patrolling major hotspots in Kensington and Chelsea, the West End and Mayfair to help people impacted by these robberies. The…
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
Happy anniversary to my darling wife. We've been married 15 years today and if you were wondering if funny blokes always bag women well out of their league - here's your answer:
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
Very proud to announce the release of my first children's book 👩‍👦❤️
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
Lovely bit of irony from the Telegraph who published both these headlines yesterday👍
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
10 months
I think this would've been a fair compromise Elon. #TwitterX
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
10 months
I don't have to make any denials. I am a BBC presenter but I'm not even a 'household name' in my own house!
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 months
UK Comedy Awards - I'm up for 'Best Radio Entertainment Show' yeah 'about bloody time!' 'you're way funnier than the rest'. Yeah I know I know but still a chance that pesky Mark Watson or Paul Sinha can pinch it so be sure to vote for me it's appreciated X
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
Brand new series of #itsafaircop starts this Friday. How exciting is that? Woop woop 🚓👮🚓
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
It's my early shift weekend at Scunthorpe nick. Just checking what's been but in my in-tray. Usual stuff: Neighbour dispute, shop theft from Boots, arrest warrant for Putin...
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
I have a shocking confession to make: I'm bored with the Djokovic thing now
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
Headline: 'Police officer accessed system and advised friend how to avoid speeding offences' First line: "A civilian police officer who worked at a camera safety unit..."
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
Newsflash: After an emergency COBRA meeting the PM has taken advice from the Chief Medical Officer that laughter boosts the immune system and has ordered an urgent commission of 'It's A Fair Cop' series 5 to start next Friday @BBCRadio4 @bbccomedy
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
Here's a pic of me in an early undercover role during my Drug Squad days
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
@LizHind3 @RevRichardColes The safety conscious cops would, the more easy-going cops wouldn't and the maverick cops would throw 'em in the boot.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
5 months
You gotta feel for Nella #ImACelebrity I once told someone that I was 'as old as the hills' and they got very upset before explaining that their Great Great Great Grandad died while climbing a hill - of course I apologised about my reckless use of language and am now more careful
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
Listening to #r4today and Tom Tugendhat informing us that tomorrow we should vote Conservative as some crime rates are falling in the last couple of years. Yeah recorded crime has plummeted to a 50% rise since 2010🤣🤣
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
I'm shocked and appalled by the actions of the officer who took the life of George Floyd. I'm also saddened by those now rushing to stick a label on all cops. It's also a stark reminder to all cops no matter how new: if you think a colleague is doing something wrong- step forward
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
My simple 5 point model for attracting and keeping the very best police candidates: 1. Pay them well 2. Train them well 3. Support them well 4. Demand high standards 5. Respect the role (1 & 5 is not happening. 2 & 4 is patchy. 3 - you tell me?)
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 months
Not a casual observation from an armchair critic but rather the considered opinion of a former Chief Crown Prosecutor. If people get sent to prison for lying about the named driver on a £100 speeding ticket - what should the penalty be if your lies to the court destroy lives?
@nazirafzal
nazir afzal
4 months
To police investigating Post Office & Fujitsu for unjust prosecutions of postmasters Anybody who gave evidence that the horizon system was working - when they knew it wasn’t - is, on the face of it guilty of perjury Anybody that covered it all up, perverted the course of justice
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
10 months
In my experience the best way to deal with a very well-built non compliant detainee who's taken their shirt off and marching towards you aggressively is to wait for them to assault you. Well done to those filming, jeering, obstructing the process and then criticising afterwards.
@AshleaSimonBF
Ashlea Simon
10 months
Embarrassing, 4 Met police officers can't deal with one unruly man today in Uxbridge so taser him. Imagine if the taser deployer was white we’d be experiencing diversity riots right now.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
Good boy Zeus 👏👏
@ChNWPoliceDogs
ChNW Police Dogs
1 year
PD Zeus was quick out of the blocks last night in Macclesfield. 3 males made off after assaulting another male. They ran….but not as fast as Zeus! 2 detained by Zeus and 1 picked up later and identified by his 2 legged colleague! 3 in custody for affray and assault. #PDZeus
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
18 days
They run towards danger every day to help keep us safe. Thank you and hope you're soon on the mend 🙏
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
Here is my open letter to the @guardian in response to the Joel Golby review of Night Coppers @Channel4 based on @sussex_police @BtonHovePolice - pls enjoy and share ad libitum x @PFEW_HQ @CCJoShiner
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
8 months
He's asked for hundreds and thousands of other offences to be taken into consideration
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
I'm raising a glass to Her Majesty the Queen. Thank you for your service Ma'am. It's been a privilege to work for you.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
15 days
This will be very complicated for self-employed people like me. I can self-certify absence due to illness for 7 days but then I'll have to ask my employer (me) for a fitness to work note and if I refuse to give myself one then I might have to sack myself.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
Genuine question. Why doesn't this headline read: "Police protect innocent members of the public from outrageous aggressive drunken teenager"?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
I've written this Plod blog about the death of George Floyd. It's my honest take from a cynical old copper. *Warning* may contain balance so if you're a blinkered supporter of the police you won't like it and if you're anti-police you won't like it either.
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
Painful day for UK policing sincerely hope this is as bad as it gets. The politicians will sort it out for us. Maybe the ones on the left who drove the damaging target culture of the 2000's or the one's on the right who's austerity policies in 2010's decimated quality of service?
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
3 years
Just found out that #itsafaircop is the second most popular @BBCSounds download of all comedy categories. This is really very exciting for me🤪 (I suppose it's a bit greedy secretly hoping we go top?) Woop Woop! 🚔👮🚔👍
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
First female Chief wasn't appointed until 1995. Now a third are women, many of whom were inspired by the first ever female Commissioner. From within she was the most respected woman in policing who has just been publicly disrespected and sacked by a man🤔
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
6 months
I’m at Westminster. Looks like the police down here have managed to get sponsorship from the post office 👍
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
2 years
I'm bias but: Some years ago I was playing @edfringe in a portacabin in a car park. A @BBCRadio4 producer was one of handful of audience. It wasn't a deal btw agents in a wine bar it was old fashioned scouting by BBC creatives to find new & original grassroots voices #LongliveBBC
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
Communion wine is dark red to represent the blood of Christ. Except for Easter Sunday when it's lighter in colour because he rosé again
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
7 months
Mar 2021: 'It's outrageous that the police are present enforcing the law' July 2023: 'The Public Order Act 2023 is a serious infringement upon civil liberties and the democratic right to protest' Oct 2023: 'Why aren't the woke police arresting the protestors?'
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
15 days
I'm delighted to announce that PD Zeus is the new supreme leader of the UK🙏
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
4 years
***Message to all UK Police Forces*** Please ensure you have full weekend call-out cover for a senior officer on Apology Duty. Should the media highlight any police failings (actual or imaginary) the duty apologist should be available at all times. ***Message ends***
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Alfie Moore - Comedy
1 year
Don’t know about you but I’ve had a steady day growing old gracefully
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