// alien stage spoilers
IM STILL IN SHAMBLES MAN do you think ivan was about to kiss till in this shot then decided against it because he wanted their first and last kiss to be in front of everyone as a testament to his love
he's been doing this since he was a kid. he's CONSISTENTLY been able to dismantle what seem like high security measures. this guy knows WAY more than he needs to know and has more more power than he needs to have and he uses it for YAOI.
okay, but sua haunting the narrative is genuinely one of the best things ever. she's a character we have access to for less than two minutes, and yet, she is all pervasive. to mizi, to ivan, to till, to the story itself—sua is everywhere.
Sua still remains as one of the most mysterious alien stage characters to me it always feels like she knows more than she let on about the aliens and alien stage
oh. oh. if sua was someone ivan saw himself in—he must have been trying to see mizi-like love from till. he doesn't see till's affections because he doesn't know what reciprocity is supposed to look like aside from mizisua.
ivantill is capital-c Complex. deep, deep sigh—not directed at person i am qrting, directed at tiktok displayed.
so, let's get into ivan's relationship with affection, shall we?
the sheer desperation in mizi's grip versus the uncannily effortless grace of sua's whole form... the way mizi leads and sua bares her soul to her... good lord... yuri wins...
some people are dogpiling but the use of rain instead of a very clear physical cry is also super ivan. you have to remember that this man doesn't feel human emotion—i wonder if he's ever felt enough to cry. maybe the rain streaming down his face is the closest he'll get.
every person dies twice—once when their heart stops beating, and once when everyone forgets them. then, the only way to keep you alive is to hold onto you with everything I have, everything I am. i will hold you together with my sheer desperation, and in that, i will love you.
do u think instead of the standard you're cute you're cuter battle they say you're wrong you're EVEN MORE WRONG actually and then giggle and blush. do you. [
#haikaveh
#kavetham
#kaveh
#alhaitham
]
anyways hkv professors. alhaitham takes an 8am lit class nobody wants to be at so they try to derail the class. he's tightlipped until someone is like you're married? and suddenly the floodgates to hell open and now he's bragging about his happy married life with his wife
and hence, the kiss is not a culmination of his love for till, his death is. the kiss is a vessel to ensure that till lives. the choking is a vessel to ensure till lives. his death is an 'i love you' that can never be said except with his eyes.
the sequence where ivan nuzzles against till chronologically succeeds the scene where till was assaulted. ivan is not an idiot and is therefore completely aware of it (maybe even through experience). ivan is AWARE that kissing someone without consent isn't right— doubly so here.
guys c'mon it's so obvious that ivan is a big strong asshole who's violent towards till and till is a poor pathetic little guy who's made his disgust clear and just wants to like mizi in peace smh
like, after a situation like that, you'd have to be a monster to pull a non-consensual kiss. till is dissociated, possibly drugged, and all-in-all out of his mind—not to mention there was a good chance he'd literally just been forced into something similar. what's the difference?
which brings me to what ivan DOES do: press his face to till's. there's no denying that ivan has a strong desire for till—the pining and yearning and longing are central to his character. so then why does he not kiss him? well, perhaps because it isn't right (not necessarily in a
moral sense, but also in the sense that till would never forgive him for it) but also perhaps because the concept of a kiss is a crystallisation of romance to US but not necessarily to IVAN.
think of it this way: do you think ivan (or any of them) know what love is?
'love' is a word we know, is a concept we know, is a concept we associate with things like kissing and touching and physical intimacy as a way to consummate emotional closeness. do you think any of the kids in anakt garden have any clue about these things? i doubt it.
which, in some ways, is far worse. ivan who knows nothing of emotions and nothing of love until it comes to till knows he will never receive a crumb of reciprocation, even in attention—and he's fine with it. he keeps giving. he keeps loving. he keeps giving.
the kiss, then, is a similar sort of vessel. it's not a romantic gesture. it's never meant to be a romantic gesture. ivan isnt happy at the end of it, till struggles to get away from it. it's not something either of them wanted—it's not longing or pining, it's a tool in his plan.
ivan's desire is nothing as abstract as love to him. it is a basal, primal desire—a need, you could argue—to be seen. to be close, even. he presses close to till in the only way he knows how, the only way that's given him a reaction. he does it again because it works.
why else does ivan take to some form of provocation or aggression in order to draw till's attention? to draw attention from someone in a romantic manner, you must act in a way that benefits their interests and satiates their wants—but ivan doesn't know this. how could he?
which is why he knows just what will jolt till out of his dissociative stupor and just what will land the killing blow on till's idea of him. a self-sacrificial fool will be mourned, a 'psycho' who flung himself at till will not. he creates a niche for a villain and fills it.
and that is how till loved ivan—by seeing him not as a genius of anakt garden, but as someone equal, an annoying friend. sua offers endless devotion and mizi offers it back in turn—but till offers ivan simplicity instead of divinity. the idea that you can be human, too.
what will hurt till the most now is not an attempt on his life—but an attempt on his autonomy. till is a character associated with freedom, someone who wants to be free. ivan is the one who attempts to free him from those shackles, and so he knows this better than anyone.
i think alhaitham was a chubby kid my only justification is that he's ripped as shit now which is significantly easier to do if you were a little rounder before
which is why ivan can bring himself to actually choke till in any capacity. the second mizi throws herself at luka, the lights blare red—but NOTHING happens this time. till has no marks after, either. he can't kill till. it's all part of a well-calculated act to push him away.
love is in the way that mizi looks at sua like she is her world, yes, but love is also in the little ways till notices ivan's differences and accepts them. love is in the way you look at someone like they are your god, but love is also in the way you believe someone is human.
and so follows that he knows that if he does something like this, at a time like this, till will not want it. till will shove him off. till will lump him in with people he hates and doesn't want to remember. till will be safe from more grief.
till, once again, is a victim. he's also in a dissociative daze. however it's clear that he fought back—wanting to die doesn't mean you don't want your bodily autonomy—and ivan knows this. he takes the collar off of till's mouth. he potentially helps him even after.
i think kaveh has anger issues. he definitely bites his tongue but that doesn't mean his temper doesn't flare up. he's a person who feels everything strongly, and so he feels anger very strongly as well. i think that's part of why he was so harsh during the Big Fight.
alhaitham who is all too happy to be like. you see this lunch. my husband made it for me. he kissed me before I left for work. the house is so noisy with him in it. versus kaveh who's like listen !!!! BOUNDARIES !!!!!! i understand calc is has but i KNOW WHAT YOURE DOING.
kaveh is a calculus professor with an 11am through the course of which he drains a litre of coffee. he's the only tolerable calculus professor but one time a student asked him about his wedding band and he went off on a tangent about separating personal and professional...
let's start with the basic premise: mizi was the only person who was nice to till.
if you check out the anakt kids diary (available on the OFFICIAL alnst twt account) you'd see that kids seem to like and enjoy till. he's seen as a little bit of a weirdo, but affectionately.
finding a value for mora in relation to irl money is near impossible but scoring it against other characters really just kinda undercurrents the fact that kaveh DOES earn a lot. he just has a LOT more debt. which is crazy.
the value of mora is something I had been trying to hopelessly figure out for months, I was confused on why kaveh was okay with handing over such a high amount like nothing, "500k isnt alot?" I thought, but no it IS alot, its almost 2 lepine's life savings, he just didn't care,,
we as a society need to stop drawing kaveh in crop tops and jeans and start drawing him in SILK SUITS. kaveh college au walking into his 8am fully decked out in a cream silk suit with gold jewellery everywhere is such a vision and it's a pity it's not more common
in conclusion: there are lots of reasons till might not have liked ivan that are not necessarily connected to ivan's behaviour towards till. ivan isn't violent. things are complicated when kids are raised in farms. thank you for reading.
he's described as a great songwriter and composer by his peers! they even enjoy it when he performs! they're also comfortable enough around him to poke fun at his crush on mizi openly in his graduation messages. all-in-all, people think he's intense...but not a bad person.
—kids at anakt garden. i mean, you'd have to be EXTREMELY empathetic to want to say 'cheer up' to a flower that's already been plucked. that's the kinda guy till is.
till falls for mizi at first sight because she's beautiful. he remains in love with her because she's kind.
87-86 and if you answer the other I will personally mail you a thesis on mizisua and then show up at your doorstep like a christian missionary spreading the yuri gospel until you agree with me
i like alhaitham being confused about what is friendship and what is love just as much as the next person. HOWEVER consider alhaitham being absolutely and fully convinced of his deep and romantic love but KAVEH being like. Haha. This Is Just How Intellectual Equals Work.
however, please remember ivan is once again a victim of extreme childhood abuse as well as literal trafficking. do you think he knows anything of being well-adjusted? do you think he knows anything of positivity? do you think he knows anything of love?
the people who are usually violent towards till are authority figures! till is not a quiet or complacent child, and he's not willing to buckle when forced—so authority doesn't like him. this does not mean kids do not like him. till is, in fact, probably one of the more sensitive—
not just to him, but to everyone. mizi is outgoing and positive and it shows in her relationships with everyone.
i hope this establishes that till's affections for mizi are not out of a misplaced ideal of a saviour. he considers her that now, but that is not necessarily the—
however, also consider this: he shows till a lot of softness, too. sitting next to till while he draws, following him around...these are normal things to do to express affection—till does this for mizi. however, this is not something that till registers, let alone as affection.
ivan is not exclusively violent. would you call what happened in black sorrow violent? i highly doubt it.
you could say that ivan provoking till into a fight is violent. i wouldn't necessarily say that—taunting someone, yes, that's mean, but it isn't necessarily violent.
he's not openly violent towards till. he does not go out of his way to hit till or beat him up or bully him. what he DOES is go out of his way to provoke till, yes, but there is a difference and i do think that distinction is important.
this is a brilliant way of establishing that the story is centred around mizi, for one. sua's existence is important because it is important to mizi—her constancy also cements mizi's place in the narrative. who is haunted by death more strongly than the one who was loved so?
but in this case—have you ever considered till might just have felt inferior or unwanted. or like ivan was simply something like a spy for his behaviour to be corrected. or even, perhaps, someone he disliked for being a liar—because ivan is mean to him, but perfect to authority.
—to stress that it's not pure violence. it's the stumblings of a kid who's figuring out how to be human. he's not necessarily doing a great job, but that doesn't mean he's intentionally violent.
—case for their childhood interactions, because the situation was less strenuous then than it is now...for both of them.
i could go on another whole tangent on why mizi is CURRENTLY till's saviour, but let's get to the next important part: ivan.
ivan is also, in the eyes of authority, antithetical to till. he's the perfect child, someone who teachers would adore. have you ever seen a 'problem child' and a 'good child' seated together? it's unfair on both ends.
and above all, sometimes people just don't like each other. ivan breaks till out of anakt garden. if there was ever a whirlwind romance, that would be a great moment to fall in love. but sometimes, it just doesn't work that way.
@ALNSTIVAN
vix im going to kill myself. i know IVE said before that ivan looks for devotion and till is eternally human but good fucking lord the way you phrased this killed me dead. yeah. yeah. yeah. i didnt need to be alive anyways. oh my god. what the fuck.
do you see what i'm saying? there's plenty of reasons for ivan's character to backfire on him. it's not necessarily about violence. i do think ivan being the guy who pulls on girls' ponytails as an expression of his crush on them is not a great thing, but i also want—
his ass is NOT beating the autistic allegations. "it was ordinary" "shallow feelings" "you won't care about me" sir i regret to inform you that your childhood dataset on emotions was skewed so bad that was NOT the normal
even if it's not ivan literally sobbing, rain has been used to portray a scene where "tears can't be seen" or a scene where elements mourn for the characters many times. is nature weeping for their eternally doomed love? is the sky crying because ivan can't? it's fun to think...
"aren't you forgetting something?"
"my lunchbox? ...in my bag!"
"no..."
"huh? what else? my keys?"
"...no."
"right, then im all settled and good to go!!!"
alhaitham with his arms crossed, looking down at kaveh before he’s about to spoil the shit outta him: “a kiss first, please.” alhaitham with a deadpan, completely serious when kaveh asks him to do something: “aren’t you forgetting about something? (it is a kiss)”
and also i think he would NOT have given a shit as a kid. he was just chilling and reading AND he was a grandmas boy that kid was FED when he was little. got bulked up
till who runs the most lucrative flower shop / tattoo parlor business of all time because he's a tattoo artist whose shop got burnt down and so is currently a florist. and ivan is the guy who burnt the tattoo shop down with his special little talent.
you ever think about how they tried to escape but till left ivan behind. you ever think that ivan isn't stupid and ivan probably knows that till loves mizi and everyone there. you ever think ivan broke only till out because freedom should be only him and till and no one else.
@arIecchiino
me when i'm a genius and my brain is constantly adapting to and comprehending information way beyond my years and i use every bit of that information to get the guy i like to pay attention to me
his love is pure because this is the only way he knows. his love is obfuscated by his lack of understanding because he only knows what he can find by trial and error. it's messy. it's bad. the point is just that: no, the kiss isn't a grand romantic gesture.
sua has connections to all the characters in some way. sua is ivan's parallel, sua is someone who cheers on till (potentially because of her connection with ivan, but we have no real idea). she exists as a pivotal force in the narrative, and is someone ivan apologises to in the
@goretine
ahhhh, good times. i remember watching this when it first dropped and then realising this. it stands to reason that till may not have even known that it was a song for him even if he did hear it, tbh.
in that sense, we are all like mizi. haunted by the fragments of an omnipresent love that we have to put together, wondering if we will ever really know her at all.