SARAH SQUIRM @SarahSquirm Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@bellrinton_iwgp

@thornprotector

@NoahMesser45235

@verythickvajjjj

@GxXxQeXnUqdYulR

@junichitai

@ISUCoachFen

@StetsonWBB

@yusrizainal

@medo5307244

@hkyushu1

@Sabrina64329275

@Mnet_aichi

@KuroroWilds

@kdz688

@toritilla5

@jazifsrant

@mblessed531

@scottiepipm

@jandakembangstw

@ayo_sussy_baka

@edgar3s

@Rami548373

@spxzzrr

@jiri_banka

@donnabmcclure

@JRayI

@Tiimbhoe

@WBGamesSupport

@shafigov

@Vexytugaa

@BlizzardCSEU_EN

@vtremolet

@jandakembangstw

@TheAthleticCBB

@KingWolf277

SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

4 years

well-actually’ing the mother of his “child”, moments after childbirth ...

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

oh you’re BORED in quar?????????? might i recommend EVERY MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dumbass

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

my question about NFT apes… have people never seen anything before?

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

was your dad a: • beatles dad • stones dad • who dad • hendrix dad • aaron copeland dad • an alcoholic

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

the amazing thing about chips is that they taste awesome and you can eat literally one million of them

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

🐷

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

i don’t know what wordle is because i’ve had sex

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@SarahSquirm

1 month

just found out i’m not hot. please give me and my family space to grieve privately and uglily at this time.

Zero Star Reviews

@ZeroStarReviews

1 month

“Am I the only person who has noticed that SNL has never hired a ‘hot woman?’”

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

just got my tubes tied (the pee pee ones. i’m sick of pee coming out!!! 😤😡🤬 no more piss for me, please)

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

thought i was going Number Two, but accidentally went Number Three 😬😬

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

4 years

me at benihana

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

4 years

･｡ ☆∴｡　* 　･ﾟ*｡★･　　･ *ﾟ｡　　 * 　･ﾟ*｡･ﾟ★｡　　　☆ﾟ･｡°*. ﾟ *　　ﾟ｡·*･｡ﾟ* 　　　ﾟ *.｡☆｡★　･　　* ☆ ｡･ﾟ*.｡　　　 *　★ ﾟ･｡ *

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

why can’t video games have kissing instead of shooting 😔

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

literally breaking a lease because accidentally moved into a neighborhood with this vibe:

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

3 years

🤪🤪 SNL just made a HUGE mistake!! 🤪🤪

Saturday Night Live - SNL

@nbcsnl

3 years

Welcome to the cast! Aristotle Athari James Austin Johnson Sarah Sherman

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

james cordon stopped me in the middle of traffic and starting doing this to my car 🥺

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

4 years

did it work

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

going down on me be like :

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

CIA rebranding as a modular synthesizer festival in Berlin

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

happy one year anniversary of me seeing my tulpa on the news

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

snl viewers visiting my twitter page like

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

when something costs more than a hundred dollars? it’s like… why?

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

Hey CUMpkin pie🍰👅 lovers!😘 it’s finally SPANKSgiving🖐🍂🌰🍅 time to be 😉thankful😏😜💋 for all that sweet potato🍊DICK 🍆🍆🌽👅 now send this to 5 of ur 👄💦 sexiest 😛😛 🦃 TURKEY 🦃 sluts in the next 🕕 15 seconds 🕒 or else i’ll do something dangerous to my family tonight

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

IN for 2022: things i like that rule OUT for 2022: things u guys like that suck crap

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

if this means the green one gets less slutty, i’m gonna 5150 myself

The Hill

@thehill

2 years

M&Ms characters to become more inclusive

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

how could chips be bad for you? they’re so small! 😗

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@SarahSquirm

1 year

👶🥹😁🥺

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

3 years

how much did those big tiddies cost, mizz nancy

Peter Daou

@peterdaou

3 years

BREAKING: #Pelosi says $600 is a "significant" amount for working families. #LetThemEatCake #TrillionForBillionaires

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

checked into a hotel last night and the woman working the front desk asked “no offense, but are you a clown?”

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

3 years

instagram has taught you all to decorate your apartments like fucking shit

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

don’t need fuckin spotify to tell me that all day every day i listen to WEEN !!!!!!!!!!!!

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

had the time of my life writing my first weekend update with @notbenmarshall + @martinmherlihy @JawnHiggins + with help from @annadrezen + celeste yim 😛 love roastin + toastin ya @ColinJost xo mwa 😘

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

he aboutta do a DIY noise set at Silent Barn

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

Josh Lewis

@thejoshl

4 years

what the NYT iowa prediction looked like for the past 48 hours and what it looks like now lmaaaaoooooooo

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

how can we get peter jackson to do a six hour Get Back style documentary about the time Fergie sang the national anthem

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

i’ve seen just so many things with my eyes and i’m wondering if these people have just simply seen anything before

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

jackass is a groundbreaking exploration of masculinity through body horror comedy and anal/balls-based performance art AMA

Jordan Snow

@jordansnow

4 years

gonna need @SarahSquirm ’s take on this

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

2 years

everything used to look cool and now everything looks like shit ‼️

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

not true…😈

koyaanisqatsi heckler

@Arr

2 years

Watching old episodes of Pop Quiz and this is a whole look that is totally extinct in the wild

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

4 years

today’s popstars are fucking cowards

kate bush’s aquarius moon

@cloudbusting

4 years

kate bush — “babooshka” tv performance (1980)

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

that’s a wrap on ⁦ @nbcsnl ⁩ Season 47 Presents: Sarah Normal 😘💋

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

homer disappearing into the bush meme but it’s homer disappearing into *my* bush… is this anything??? seriously that little yellow bald dude can get it tho fr…

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

3 years

i think i’m about to make one million dollars ...

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

10 months

my patron saint ❤️ you invented everything ❤️ you created a world we all wish we could live in ❤️💕 PEE WEE FOR FUCKING EVER !!!! ❤️💕

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

3 years

🤞 please @nbcsnl can Cannibal Corpse be musical guest 🤞🙂

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

this man was blasting The Gap dressing room playlist while he was deciding to invade Libya

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

tfw i take a pic of my open puss with the flash on

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

HO(e) HO(e) HO(e)☃️❄️💦Merry CUMmas!‼️🎄its time to jingle🔔those big balls🔴🎶 because its the most fuckable😜time of the year! Even Misses Clause👵🏻wants a big ol’ candy cane in her stocking🎅🏼👀🎁🍆Send this to 10 gingerbread SLUTS👼🏻 If u receive 5 back u have covid 😫💦💦‼️

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

conner o'malley is our most important cultural artifact

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

cumming and puking? sounds like will smith is undergoing what doctors call “The Sarah Squirm Experience” 😗

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

2 years

my tulpa

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

setting aside the obvious NFT money laundering of it all… i’m coming from a purely image-based argument and wondering about the act of *seeing* and *beholding*

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

u know the dick good when she makes grape lady falling down noises 🤪

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

we can all agree that this was one of the coolest things anyone has ever done

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

literally can’t think of anything worse than weed

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

of course i’m addicted to diet coke… i’m a fucking GROWN UP!!!

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

😭😭😭

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@SarahSquirm

1 month

@PopCrave you guys always crop me out of these

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

why would u wanna get dewormed i’m tryna worm up every day of my fucking life

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

the only Golden Globes i care about 🤪🤪

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

UPDATE: just found out what sex is… i was misinformed earlier… YUCK! that sounds disgusting, none for me, please!

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

4 years

i spent the hottest part of my 20s being anxious about whether or not people i hate liked me

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

this is now the richest person on the planet

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

i miss when comedians were ugly

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

i'm actually glad that student debt exists! people should be cruel/unusually punished for trying to read more

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

4 months

@PopCrave why’d you guys crop me out

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

i’m having this issue with “Funko Pops” as well…

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

when someone has a lot of plants in their house it’s like… ok.. ??????????????

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@SarahSquirm

4 years

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

ahh yes, the blue check… the badge of the criminally insane…

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@SarahSquirm

3 years

for halloween this year, i’m going as Completely Unrecognizable

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

every time i see/hear the term “wordle”, my puss completely shrivels up and falls off

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

3 years

to the joker, this is a normal frog

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@SarahSquirm

2 years

😛🫢 i effed up on live tv 🫢😛 got to write this one with the loves of my life @martinmherlihy + @JawnHiggins + @notbenmarshall + celeste yim 💗💖

Saturday Night Live - SNL

@nbcsnl

2 years

Backstage tour of SNL with @SarahSquirm !

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

2 years

love choking down enormous vitamins that stink so bad they make me throw up , all because a woman with gorgeous skin told me they’re good for my “immune system”

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SARAH SQUIRM

@SarahSquirm

4 years

fffaaaiiiilllleeddd ssttaaatteee