I recently watched The Grinch for the first time this holiday season and this caught my attention. As a student of history, it naturally piqued my interest. So I did some research and you won’t believe what I found out. /1
Our waiter tonight thought I was Bryce Harper so of course I played along and told him I was signing with the Yankees. He was very happy because he was from the Bronx.
BREAKING: A giant cargo ship "Felicity Ace" is on fire in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.
It's carrying a cargo of Porsche and VW automobiles.
The crew safely abandoned ship in lifeboats. Under maritime law the ship is now "finders keepers."
Best way to combat sign stealing is to not give signs. Ever. It’ll speed up the game. Everybody is guessing. Fans think it’ll be a change-up. Catcher wants a heater. I want a slider lmaooooooo NOW WHAT?!
Fri: Anthony Rizzo HR in NYY debut
Sat: Javy Baez HR in NYM debut
Sun: Kris Bryant HR in SF debut
They're the first trio of former teammates in the Modern Era to start the season on the same team, and then homer in their respective debuts with a new team later that season.
Even though our time together was short I want to thank every
@Cubs
fan from the bottom of my heart. My family and I will never forget our time on the north side. It was a dream come true ❤️
I’m of the opinion that this entire cheating scandal was spearheaded by sports illustrated in 2014 when they predicted that the Astros were going to win the World Series in 2017. Confirmed time-travelers and confirmed Illuminati. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.
On 7/5, our daughter Josephine Marie Williams was born. Through the gift of adoption & the selfless love of her birth mom, Jojo has blessed our family. We are overjoyed and can’t imagine our family without her. We ask for prayers for our family and for Jojo’s birth family. 🥰
I’m really excited to watch Barry Bonds get his number retired by the Giants on Saturday. I’m also slightly terrified that he will sign a one-day contract and be in the lineup.
Parents, are you worried your teen is texting about the 2020 baseball season? Use this cheat sheet:
BOTC: Bangin’ on Trash Cans
WWTTT: Why Would Trevor Throw That?
SHIT: Sliding Hard Into Third
TNULG: The New Unis Look Great
TPHMG: They Play How Many Games?
Still laughing at how a bunch of people sat in a room and said “yeah there’s nothing important going on the night of 11/3 — let’s do the gold glove ceremony then”
By the grace of God and the beautiful gift of adoption I am a
#GirlDad
. Kobe was such a great example... I can’t wait to try and follow in his footsteps
#MambaDad
To
@Pirates
fans everywhere: it has been an honor. I never took for granted putting on the black and gold and representing the city of Pittsburgh across my chest. Thank you for welcoming my family and I. Peace and love ✌🏻💛🤟🏻🖤
@MLB
Trevor Williams is cheating. Every time he is given a new ball he rubs his left arm and the rubs down the ball. Foreign substance? Cards vs Pirates
Dear Mr. Ohtani,
You would be a great fit for the Pittsburgh Pirates! We have IC Light, Primanti Bros, pierogi races, and average to above average jokes in the clubhouse.
Yinz (?) will love it here in the 412.
Respectfully,
Trevor Williams
If Josh Bell wins the
#HRDerby
then I will release the first page of my Star Wars/Harry Potter/Princess Bride crossover fan-fiction. Fingers crossed 🤞🏻 🤞🏻
I don’t like getting political on Twitter but this has to be said: We have to stop pretending that cauliflower rice is an acceptable alternative to rice.
On Divine Mercy Sunday, Jojo’s birthmom told us that she wanted Jackie & I to be the adoptive parents of her daughter. The next day Jackie & I found out God has a great sense of humor by showering us with the grace of another child. Baby boy due in Jan 💙Holy Family, pray for us.
I’ve waited a long time to pitch in front of a full house at Wrigley. Being on the bench for the last 6+ weeks, seeing the fans and hearing the crowd, I couldn’t wait to get out there. Thank you for bringing it today and every day✌🏻
If I’m a GM I’m offering G. Cole 10 years for $10,000,000. If he says no then I’ll offer him a blank check. The dude is on a different planet and is only getting better.
I had to get a Trevor Williams
@Chargers
jersey because he doesn’t have a Twitter and I get his tweets every Sunday. I will now answer all Chargers CB Trevor Williams related questions on Twitter on his behalf. Thx have a gr8 day.
FOOTBALL IS BACK! It’ll be crazy travel for me the rest of the year going back and forth between
@Pirates
and
@Chargers
games. I’ve been training hard and have a great support system 🙂
A huge thank you to the fans that supported us this through this crazy season. To the fans that didn’t... log-off the WiFi and try to smile a little more 🤠
A huge thank you to everybody that came out to PNC park to support us in 2018. Although we did not accomplish the goal we set in spring training there is a lot to look forward to in 2019. See you there 👀👀👀👀
It was truly an honor,
@TheCUTCH22
. You represent the Pirates, the city of Pittsburgh, and the entire MLB perfectly. Thank you for saving my butt a few times this season, too 💘
My advice for young people:
1. Papercut
2. One Step Closer
3. With You
4. Points of Authority
5. Crawling
6. Runaway
7. By Myself
8. In The End
9. A Place For My Head
10. Forgotten
11. Cure For The Itch
12. Pushing Me Away
Advice for young people:
1. Skip college.
2. Learn a trade.
3. Get married young.
4. Join a small biblical church.
5. Have babies as soon as you can.
6. Homeschool your kids.
7. Catechize your kids.
8. Date your spouse.
9. Don’t own a TV.
10. Go camping.
You can tell me I'm a bad pitcher or that I don't have a thigh gap, but DONT EVER respond to my tweets in more than 140 characters. I will block & report you
Tonight (and only tonight) we are enemies, Pittsburgh. I’m sorry but the
@Chargers
pay me this time of year to play cornerback. Here is a good photo of me during pregame warmups earlier today.
Behind every great man is an even better woman. It was an honor to get to meet you and listen to stories of you and your family. Rest In Peace with your husband, Vera.