Unbiased Ev @DoubleVodkaDon Twitter profile

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Being the villain is so much more fun than being the hero. Buckeyes by a billion.

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Last Seen Profiles

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Post Malone covering Sublime is exactly what you think it would be........ AMAZING

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 years

Never forget that Roger Goodell watched a video of Ray Rice knocking his gf out cold and initially suspended him 2 games while Calvin Ridley is getting suspended a full season off rip for betting on games he had no involvement or insider info on

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 years

My best friend is getting married today. Went out and hit it hard last night. He was hurting so woke up and took what he thought was 3 Advil. Apparently it was 3 Xanax. All time wedding blunder. Getting married at 4:30. He’s sound asleep where all the groomsman are getting ready.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

To all my Big Boys out there: Don’t be a weirdo and chill on the beach with a shirt on. Be confident, take the top off and put your self-made man meat on display for the world to see. Wear it loud and proud because you earned it. #UnitsRespectUnits

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

I almost have a neck now. Shouts to me for (kinda) having a neck.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Who wore it better? #sexcannon

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Official Madison, Wisconsin Review: IT SLAPS DIFFERENT

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

9 months

Seamless transition from calling a baseball game straight to a boxing match. Announcer is a real pro’s pro. Give him a raise ASAP. Well done 🤝

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Caught a 20 hour twitter suspension for telling some troll that I’d fuck his mom and sister. After serving my time I’d like to apologize to absolutely no one and would like to say I’ll still fuck his mom and sister and make them rub my belly while I do it

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

BREAKING NEWS: After last nights events I unfortunately have been given a lifetime ban from the Tropicana Casino in Atlantic City, NJ. Still unaware of the reasoning for my expulsion but apparently calling the dealer a “dirty fucking rat“ when he rips 21 with a 6 is frowned upon.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

8 months

A lot of Patriot fans in their 20s getting a big dose of reality right now. All that fun you used to have? That entitlement to winning? That shits all over. You’re now normal loser fans just like the rest of us. Welcome home.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

This happening in Wisconsin is the least surprising thing I’ve ever heard. I preach it again and again. Wisconsin = nicest people on planet earth

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Crushed my 5 miles this morning and I’m officially down over 50 pounds (the lightest I’ve been since I was 17 years old). Hard work pays off and a mixture of consistency and discipline will make small victories over time become big victories. Just keep pushing #StepxStep #SXS

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

BREAKING: I just saw my penis without the help of a mirror or sucking my gut in for the first time in a decade #StepxStep

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

I’m feeling myself so I’m gonna flex a lil bit. I’m down from almost 335 and 4XL shirts to 295 and 2XL shirts. You’re god damn right I’m gonna have a few drinks today and you bet your sweet ass I’m gonna have a burger and a hot dog (no buns) because I deserve it #StepxStep #SXS

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

“Dwayne Haskins is more of a runner than a thrower” Dwayne Haskins Stats: Passing - 4,831 yards and 50 TDs Rushing - 108 yards 4 TDs

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

This is the worst day of my life. I feel like I’m in a bad nightmare but I keep pinching myself and it’s still real. The @Giants actually just picked Daniel Jones. I hate everything.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

There’s a new sheriff in town #wiggledick

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Big Ten students and student-athletes will be on campus in just a few weeks in classrooms, libraries, gyms, dorm rooms, bars and restaurants but not playing football........ I’ve crunched the numbers and the math simply doesn’t add up.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

The moment this man sat down he knew he wasn’t getting up for the rest of the night #UnitsRespectUnits

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Did I do this right? #dickwigglers

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

The whole NC State baseball team should go to the rest of the CWS games just to troll the NCAA. The fact that they could go to the game and sit in the stands without a mask but can’t play is preposterous. The NCAA has no idea what the fuck they’re doing. Useless organization.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Official Milwaukee Day 1 Review: I Love Milwaukee

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

BREAKING: The CDC announces that it’s officially a Hot Boy Summer

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

This is a hate crime on the Unit community #UnitsRespectUnits

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

The Vodka Red Bull vs Red Bull Vodka debate has officially been settled

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Woke up to crush 6 miles this morning and started reflecting on the fact that if you told me 3-4 months ago I’d be waking up before 7 am to workout and I’d be down almost 70 pounds I’d say you were crazy. My point is that people can change, physically and mentally #StepxStep #SXS

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Billy Football just beat Jose Canseco in a boxing match via 1st round KO. That really just happened in real life. This is the best company in the world. Viva.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Two years ago today I graduated from college and I’m doing exactly what I expected to be doing with my degree...... dancing in woman’s clothes for money.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 years

Update: he’s talking and moving, he’s now in the shower and getting ready. Luckily they weren’t high dosage Xanax so things are starting to look up. He knows what happened. None of the bridal party has twitter so please do not tell the bride. It’ll be twitters little secret

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

10 days

Tom Brady Roast Power Rankings: 1) Tony Hinchcliffe 2) Nikki Glaser 3) Andrew Schultz 4) Jeff Ross 5) Julian Edelman 6) Bill Belichick 7) Gronk 8) Ron Burgandy 9) Drew Bledsoe 10) Sam Jay 11) Peyton Manning 12) Bert Kresicher + Tom Segura 13) Randy Moss 14)Kim K 15) Ben Affleck

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Shohei Ohtani is the living embodiment of what everyone told me Babe Ruth was when I was a kid

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Wiggle dicked myself into a hernia @holy_schnitt

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Update: I’m alive

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

6 months

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

This may be an unpopular take but I hate snow. I get it’s aesthetically pleasing but as a grown man who doesn’t snowboard or ski, snow does absolutely nothing for me besides inconvenience my life.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

I’m addicted to playing the heel. I’m not Irish I’m Scottish it’s all Wisconsin

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

The perfect Thanksgiving starts with blacking out Thanksgiving Eve, stumble back home somewhere between 3-5 am. Wake up around 10 and grab a breakfast sandwich. Head over to families house around 12-1 and have a nice antipasta and some shrimp cocktail. Dinner around 3:30-4:30.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Hey @AEW is this guy the best you got? I just stuffed this hack in my back pocket @The_MJF

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 months

3-5 record vs Ohio State. Damn shame he’s gonna leave without ever evening the score. The Buckeyes own him.

Adam Schefter

@AdamSchefter

4 months

Breaking: Jim Harbaugh is leaving Michigan to accept the head coaching job with the Los Angeles Chargers, sources tell ESPN. The Chargers get their man while the national champions now have a head-coach opening.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 years

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

tweet tweet tweet @whoisaddison

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

8 months

Don’t talk shit if you don’t want the smoke. That geriatric fuck shouldn’t have been running his mouth. He picked the wrong one. Ryan Day just walked into his house and shit in his toilet.

Jack McGuire

@JackMacCFB

8 months

This is who Ryan Day is beefing with. You know how crazy that is 😭🤣😭🤣😭🤣😭😭😭😭😭

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Who’s version is better? #wiggledickin

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

If Meek Mill doesn’t visit Robert Kraft in jail he ain’t a real one

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 years

Signed a new contract with Barstool. Thank you to @stoolpresidente and @erika_ there’s no one else I’d rather work for and no place I’d rather be. Getting to talk/gamble on sports for a living is a dream come true. Grateful to be a part of the pirate ship. To the moon 🚀🚀 #VIVA

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

6 years

To the mystery man from Michigan who catfished me that ultimately resulted in me getting a full time job at Barstool and flying on a Private Jet to Ann Arbor today: I love you and would love to meet up for a drink if you feel comfortable revealing yourself you sweet prince

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Barstool HQ has made the official switch from water bottles to a water cooler. The key to mastering the water cooler life is filling up your cup/bottle all the way and then chugging atleast 1/3 of it and then refilling it to quench your initial thirst but still keep the longevity

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 months

Klemmer being so boring that Dave cut the stream ending up being the reason the stream is gonna be incredibly entertaining is why I love Barstool. The moment Klemmer finds out he hasn’t been live for the last 50 hrs is now one of the most anticipated moments in company history.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 years

Update # 3: the cat is out of the bag and surprisingly not from these tweets. His soon to be wife called him to check that he wasn’t too drunk already because he’s a party animal. He said “quite frankly it’s much worse, I took a few Xanax by accident” that’s communication people

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

About to go in for hernia surgery after a nurse shaves my stomach and pubes. Not exactly thrilled about it. If I die it was a hell of a run. Hopefully I see you guys on the other side. I love you all and god bless. #StepxStep #SXS

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Another private charter and another confused look through the rear view mirror as the Uber driver pulls up to the gate of the private airport with the fat guy in a Hawaiian shirt in his back seat. I live for that confused look. I cherish it. I’m just as confused as you are pal.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 months

It’s amazing how much more likeable this Gonzaga team got the second Drew Timme isn’t on the roster

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

If you’re gonna make changes whether it’s with yourself or within the community, be genuine. Don’t be a fraud like @MujFricke I was boots on the ground marching for BLM in my community. He’s made all kinds of ignorant and insensitive remarks. He’s no moral compass.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

PSA on behalf of rational thinking fat people: STOP BEGGING FOR EXTRA FREE SEATS ON A PLANE. NO ONE OWES YOU ANYTHING EXTRA BECAUSE YOU’RE FAT. STOP IT.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

Okay now the argument is over. You heard it from the man himself. All the burner accounts with mascots as profile pictures, I hate to break it you, but compared to Joe Burrow your opinion on the matter is irrelevant. “I’m a Buckeye” - Joe Burrow

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Pornhub must be licking their chops right now

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

Hey @stoolpresidente just wanted to get a statement from you. You’re rooting for Ohio State right? After two years in a row of Michigan embarrassing the Big Ten on the biggest stage in sports Ohio State has to come save the day once again. As a man of honor I know you’ll do right

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

I really got in my Nashville bag for this one

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

6 months

Being a sports fan is so stupid. Really wish I was into cars or movies or something else but nope. Just sports. What a big dumb idiot I am.

Dave Portnoy

@stoolpresidente

6 months

I really hate to see my guy @DoubleVodkaDon down like this. Just feel terrible for him

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

6 months

Grown men weeping because their head coach is in his luxury hotel room eating chips on the couch hahahahahahaha

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Just crushed 5 miles and lemme tell ya hard work pays off people...... ya boy is down 51 pounds #StepxStep #SXS #ChipAway

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha @UMichFootball

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@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Crushed 6 miles this morning for the legend Jared Lorenzen. He lost his life 1 year ago today fighting the same demons I’ve fought my whole life. I couldn’t have lost this weight without his influence. I told myself I’d lose the weight for him and I just hope I’m making him proud

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@DoubleVodkaDon

6 months

He’s 2-5 against Ohio State dipshit

Dave Portnoy

@stoolpresidente

6 months

You forgot the most important one. Beat the piss outta Ohio every time they play.

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@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

Couldn’t think of a better way to walk into the office @StuartFeiner

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Here’s the facts about Jim Harbaugh. Everyone is in love with the idea of him. The only problem is he’s a big ass crybaby in khaki pants who can’t win a big game to save his life. Every year is Michigan’s year until they get neutered by OSU. Most overrated coach of all-time.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Lookin’ like a white Suge Knight

Marty Mush

@martymush

5 years

Classic big guy move. Nobody asking to sit on the inside

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 months

RELOAD THE MOTHERFUCKING CLIP!!! WE COMING FOR THE STRAP!!! 😤😤😤

Pete Thamel

@PeteThamel

4 months

Source: Caleb Downs is committing to Ohio State. The former Alabama safety led the Tide in tackles this season.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

6 months

Acting like Harbaugh died you can’t make this shit up 😂😂😂😂😂 what a bunch of clowns

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Did 1.4 million views on TikTok without having to dance in woman’s clothes. Versatility at its finest. Big day for the brand.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

6 months

This has gotta be as good of a time as ever for me to ask for a raise right?

Dave Portnoy

@stoolpresidente

6 months

Hey @DoubleVodkaDon I'm only going to sell these if you are okay with it. I don't want to rub it in anymore. Are you cool with this?

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 years

Dwayne Haskins news hit me so hard I didn’t even process how much of a scumbag Schefter was for that tweet. His teammates love him and he brought myself and all Ohio State fans so much genuine joy. Feel honored to have watched him play. Life is so short. This hurts bad.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

I’d die for Brian Daboll

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

Popped an edible, started flipping through the channels and I catch Elf right at the start. The stars are aligning for me. What a night.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Pro tip on how to win over a crowd in enemy territory: Yell “FUCK TERRORISTS” and start a “USA!” chant. Works 11 times out of 10.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

If you’re not tipping your delivery driver you’re a total scumbag, plain and simple.

Barstool Sports

@barstoolsports

1 year

Should you always tip your DoorDash/UberEats drivers?

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

Alabama -22.5. Officially the worst loss of my gambling career. What a selfish bastard that kid is.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

7 months

Our society has gone so soft it’s so sad. Apparently yelling at a player on the sideline now is a step too far. Made a stupid mistake in a crucial moment of course the coach is gonna be pissed and should hold him accountable. Had coaches yell at me worse on the reg in peewee ball

Jason Stewart

@JasonStewart

7 months

Daboll showing up his quarterback for the cameras instead of waiting three minutes to have this talk in the locker room. Players have to hate this. Saving face for the viewers while losing the respect of your team. #NYGiants

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

People talk so much shit about minivans but I’ve personally never once had a complaint about riding in one. They’re simply pleasant to travel in. Truly a delight.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

5 years

Moving into a new apartment on Tuesday. Winner gets the big room. All problems should be solved via YouTube marble racing.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

6 years

Fat Guy Facts #4 - Maneuvering through crowded places

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Hide your girlfriends @martymush @Glenny_balls

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

On the plane to Dallas. Realized I had a middle seat last minute. Didn’t panic. Checked the seat map and saw there was one aisle seat open in the back of the plane and slid into it flawlessly. All after consuming a Dion Waiters amount of edibles. Poise. Execution. Victory. ✈️

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

3 years

Fuck everyone. Go Buckeyes.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

If I eat a pear, is it considered cannibalism?

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

4 years

The collab the world has been waiting for @BarstoolRia

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

The fact that we really were good enough is what makes it hurt the most. This team could have won a national title and we let it slip through our fingers. I’m devastated.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

2 years

Ohio State Update: I’m still alive (for now) but the season is over

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

1 year

Been in Vegas for less than an hour and I’ve already started transforming into Joe Burrow. My haters are in absolute shambles. Pray for them.

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Unbiased Ev

@DoubleVodkaDon

6 months

The delusion of Harbaugh and the Michigan program is insane. In what world do you become “America’s team” for cheating and getting caught? All the adversity they’re facing is 100% self inflicted.

Clayton Sayfie

@CSayf23

6 months

Jim Harbaugh on Michigan: “It’s gotta be America’s team. This has gotta be America’s team.”

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@DoubleVodkaDon

4 months

This is MASSIVE. The boys are pissed off and I love it. Unfinished business. Beat TTUN. Big 10 championship. 2025 national title. If you aren’t with us now I don’t want your congratulations later.

Denzel Burke

@DenzelBurke10

4 months

Chasing Legacy and Greatness. They are going to remember my name. Thank you God!!

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