CLAUDIA MORALES @CLAUDIAPOSTING Twitter profile

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CLAUDIA MORALES

7 months

today is ryan’s wake. thinking about how alive we were this day. thinking about how, because i bought this silly souvenir, i now have him and i telling each other “i love you” on video forever. i love you i love you i love you.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

26 days

they should invent a way out that isn’t through

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

asked the two 40-something-yr-old men in front of me at madison square garden if they were going to talk loudly through Every song + one of them was MAD + kept looking back at me + now i’m reading his texts over his shoulder + sarah just texted him “i don’t care to hear from you”

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

one year ago today ryan and i went on a five-borough date — thirteen hours doing at least one activity in each borough, a bucket list item he said he had never had the right date for before me. he later told me it was the day he knew he wanted to spend his life with me.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

8 years

so we beat on, boys against the current, borne ceaselessly back into the town

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

i sincerely hope that nobody monday morning quarterbacking the worst moments of my life ever has to find out what they actually WOULD do if their partner was killed in front of them and an edited-down video of it went viral incurring months of violent, vile harassment

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

14 days

sorry but it is so truly funny that taylor swift gave a very particular but ample category of annoying people two hours to get all their "there'll never be another folklore/evermore" out before dropping a Disc 2 that seamlessly completes that trilogy

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

i found this note in ryan’s phone. he did, he did, he did.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

how do you go forward from the love of your life dying when you’re 28 and all his friends and family are telling you he planned to propose within a year. how do i have a whole life after him when we were supposed to have a whole life together

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

14 days

she should've titled disc 1 and disc 2 "it's so over" and "we're so back" respectively

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

can anyone explain to me why the williamsburg trader joe’s is teasing reputation tv

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

wish you were here

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

2 months

at karaoke i complimented this girl on the song she did & she was like "that band is divisive, a lot of people hate them" & i looked her in the eyes & said "through whimsy in your heart all things are redeemable" & she got really quiet & said "you just exonerated me from so much"

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

ryan and i met in person two years ago today — we’d eventually both call it our first date, grinning any time we told people abt it. we got drinks at jimmy’s corner + saw david byrne’s american utopia + closed down the times square margaritaville. i miss him every fuckin day.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

i hope you find love — romantic or not — that fills the voids clearly so agonizing inside you; i hope you find love so strong and true that it drowns out clamoring darkness even after a person is taken from you. the way ryan saw me changed me. i hope someone changes you.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

1) i'm not a don't-talk-during-shows purist it was just truly egregious 2) after sarah texted him more about why she didn't care to hear from him he sent back "okay sorry then / can i at least enjoy the show / i wouldn't do this to you" ???? ?

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

woke up 29, woke up missing ryan

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

1 year

@grace_roso “i have to be on the train for 45 minutes to go to the beach” like that isn’t a gift and a triumph lmao ???

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 years

it is with a heavy heart that i must confirm the years start coming and they don’t stop coming

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

all i feel toward the people harassing me is deep pity — behavior symptomatic of extreme loneliness, scarcity of community and connection, totally cut off from the infinite rewards of caring about + being good to people in/beyond yr life or even having those people to begin with

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

receiving harassment bc of this post taking posts out of context — icing as a moment of levity after ryan’s close friends and i had a gutting one-month-mark dinner, not wanting to be explicit about ryan’s gruesome death in a stranger’s mentions, displacement framed as “traveling”

pine_tree_riots

@pine_tree_riots

6 months

was a bit curious what chapo antifa bro's gf has been up to tldr; she's been partying and traveling with that gofundme $$$$ and also referring to him being viciously murdered as "died suddenly" lmao

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

11 months

my boyfriend followed me because of this tweet and now we are building a life together

Jon

@BiggestttHater

11 months

what is y’all most liked tweet?

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

i miss ryan so fucking much

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

last night ryan’s college dedicated a community library to him. i read publicly for the first time in many years. ryan spent the last two years encouraging me to come out of writing retirement, and now i have. i left the @NifMuhammad book we bonded over loving on our first date.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

grief is humiliating what do you mean i’m crying to iris by goo goo dolls in this uber

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

went to the urgent care and they did an ekg and diagnosed me with the body keeping the score

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

4 months

ryan and i one year ago today

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

early on with ryan before i knew we were in it forever i would say he was either going to be the worst breakup or my life or the person i married but it turns out it was a secret third thing

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

two glimmers of light that have come from the right’s vile reaction to ryan’s death and the worst trauma of my life — this correspondence between my friend and a temporary troll + this other person’s comment

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

ryan this one's for you

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

28 days

a gut punch but a very welcome one

Hanif Abdurraqib

@NifMuhammad

28 days

Here is an interview that I was thankful to do, perhaps the most vulnerable of the interviews I’ve done in the past couple of months, which is saying a lot but is also a testament to the space Katherine created. I hope you’ll read it.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

two months without ryan today

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

must remember that the people taking issue with me saying "died suddenly" in a wholesome local reporter's mentions instead of jumpscaring him with gruesome murder are deeply friendless, have never been invited to a party, etc

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

4 months

actually i'm not a —

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

spent yesterday with ryan’s family + visited him for the first time since we buried him + it felt like the first time, full stop + we poured out miller lites into the soil for him just like he would pour out narragansetts for his best friend

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

11 days

six inch inseam absolute maximum you're all on notice

Nicole Rifkin🫠

@nicole_rifkin

12 days

praying for dudes to actually commit to short shorts this summer

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

“you would not be posting photos calling yourself hot if you were grieving” literally i am carrying on his legacy ?

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

ryan’s parents and i are cleaning out his apartment — which i was supposed to move into soon — and it’s breaking my fucking heart

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

shouldn’t have had the mbta purified water now i’m in complete disrepair

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

9 months

when i am in the west village i have the distinct visceral feeling that sabrina brier could be around any and every corner

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

extremely human and normal way to be

♡madam sandler♡

@VlRTUALBOY

3 months

When people tell me they've gotten tickets to her concert or god forbid quote a song lyric at me i file them away into a part of my brain dedicated to people who aren't as human as me and not as capable in the business of human emotion

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

@DoctorSlothe i think talking at shows is fine if you consider those around you and read the room, both in vibe and in volume; if the dude from all the way up front could tell it was you who was talking, it was probably too quiet for the conversation you were having to the point of distraction

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

2 months

i miss ryan

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

this tweet is becoming bigger than itself, bigger than the dazed morning dispatch to my friends, so here is some context. here is my ryan:

Slain NYC man remembered as tireless advocate, beloved colleague

Ryan Thoresen Carson was stabbed to death in an unprovoked attack.

gothamist.com

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

no she isn't 🫶

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

1 month

half a year without ryan today i am spending it writing on the train ride from boston to new york, a trip we took together so many times; these photos are from three of those travels, each to spend time with family and friends and the friends who we considered family; i love you

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

i (31m) died while i had custody of the switch and didn't leave my girlfriend (28f) instructions on where to find her copy of legend of zelda: tears of the kingdom. AITA?

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

14 days

ryan won this one i fear

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@CLAUDIAPOSTING

26 days

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

i do not recommend the love of your life being killed in front of you

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

in life, someone close to ryan once asked him if he was ever worried people would take the “COO of Antifa” in his twitter bio seriously and ryan responded that nobody could possibly be that stupid

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

because my daily darkest moments of grief aren't available for their tourism + spank banks, they're painting me as "living it up" and "doing just fine" while i'm applying for disability leave (for which i meet every requirement) and struggling with basic tasks and cannot go home

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

i have not in fact gone on any "pub crawls" and i'm being responsible about my drinking but only ryan's friends can appreciate how funny it is that these losers are like "she's going on pub crawls not grieving" ryan would be furious if i DIDN'T have some beers about him dying

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

4 months

three months without ryan today; a whole season, a blink, an eternity; i love you

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

i have bad news for the people mad that i’m grieving while hot

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

“advertising herself to prospective suitors” lmao i am just existing

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

The right has been spreading the lie that I did not describe Ryan’s killer to police. I spent the longest and worst hours of my life — following the moment I knelt at the love of my life’s side as he died — with police, describing the scene and the assailant over and over again.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

1 month

if you dislike someone you don’t have to find a reason to make it a moral crusade by doing mental gymnastics for why they should be canceled you can just keep it to yourself and go about your life and then talk about how annoying they are over margaritas i do it all the time

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

4 months

ryan and i at his new year’s eve party one year ago tonight; we were so excited for another year by each other’s side — we talked so much about how we’d spend it building the life we were going to spend together; i can’t even begin to make sense of entering a year without him

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

going to start referring to the lies being circulated about me as fanfiction

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

1 year

every day i receive texts like this seconds apart from each other

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 days

ryan had such a way with words

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

4 months

bushwick is really providing for me today

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

the only slot my psychiatrist has available next week is 4:20 on valentine's day and if that's not ryan fucking with me from the afterlife i don't know what is

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

for everyone saying “they would still find issue even with more digestible and predictable grieving” you no longer have to frame that as speculation :-)

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

4 months

at the beginning of this year i did not think i would be ending it saying things like "i wish the new york post would leave me the fuck alone" but here we are

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

@KILLTOPARTY the “grieving while hot” tweet was a flip reference to a different harassment tweet that had gone around that day where someone cherry-picked posts and photos and said i was “partying” and “traveling” when everything included were moments of levity in emotional ryan-grief events

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

1 month

an enabling echo chamber is not community is not friendship and will not protect you or your best interest

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

my life has never been easy and this is the hardest and darkest it has ever been, but it is also full of true love and friendship and community and kindness and joy and candor and zeal and solidarity. it is truly sad to imagine how much those people lack what i have in abundance.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

4 months

somehow i am still here and still me and i am going to make the absolute most of every precious moment i get

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@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

i am very very very very very lucky

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

i am truly terrified of the next two months because i don’t know how i’ll make it through christmas and new year’s and my birthday and valentine’s day — four of my favorite days, four of the best days i got to share with ryan — but i am going to look it in the eye

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

@Vermars26 i have witnesses but i understand having friends is probably foreign to u

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

wednesday parting a packed extremely sold out brooklyn steel right down the middle before their She’s Actin’ Single (I’m Drinking Doubles) cover and then doing this was a perfect perfect moment

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

a text from ryan the day that marked one year since we started seeing each other. i miss him and i miss the future.

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

i would be in a lonelier, foggier place if my grief weren't informed by others' vulnerability, generosity, and candor in theirs; posts from over the years — including ryan's — prepared me for this moment long before it came; i will not hide my grief away; i am not ashamed of it

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

i have to start adding "he's dead" disclaimers on cute ryan posts in case they circulate beyond my circle so that well-meaning people don't hit me with the "so happy for you" or "it should have happened to me" energy

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

i want this year behind me but i can't stomach being in a year ryan was never in

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

saying this then posting this hours later is so funny

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

ryan literally kept a bottle of champagne in his fridge for years and years for this exact occasion

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

9 days

something insane about watching your doctor put “watched her boyfriend be killed and then endured large-scale hateful harassment about it” into your chart

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@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

actually very tired of people expecting me to act a certain way like i didn’t lose the person i was building a whole life with which would be world-endingly traumatic on its own but which for me comes with layers and layers of additional extreme trauma and with it deep deep shock

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

2 months

hey does anybody want to be normal to me and do normal behavior and treat me normal

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

1 month

remember when people tried to cancel me for posting selfies too soon after my boyfriend was killed

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

2 months

i miss ryan

CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

1 year

happy anniversary of when a man i had (what i truly believed was) an """unrequited""" crush on walked me home five (5) miles from the bowery ballroom to bushwick and i was still like "what a nice platonic gesture" anyway he's my boyfriend now

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

hell yeah brother

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

these are some of the last photos i took of ryan — i thought he looked cute helping me put shoulder cushions on my backpack straps

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

two months later and people are still parroting parody news site headlines and twitter lies about me refusing to describe the guy and visiting him in jail as truth lmao

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

being at a show was extremely weird and overwhelming but also very good and it made us feel closer to ryan, physically closer, like he was just at the bar about to come back with cold ones; he would’ve wanted me to still go and he would’ve been happy i looked cute doing it

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

1 month

yesterday i had an appointment w someone i hadn't seen since before october & when she was like "you mentioned a partner last time right?" i said "i haD a boyfriend" & later i said i'm going to easter at his folks' in boston & she thought they just sided with me in a breakup 😭

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

8 months

last night i had a nightmare that i checked my credit card and i had spent exactly $96 in one dunkin donuts transaction and then i swiped over to my dunkin donuts app and found it was because i had signed up for something called " dunkin donuts platinum "

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

you do not have "haters" you have "people you treated like garbage and who you're scared of running into"

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

5 months

this is an excellent, lucid interview; moved by the grace and candor w/ which blake has handled tabloids taking the worst moments of his life out of context, sensationalizing them, and throwing them to cruel bloodthirsty self-righteous freaks as i process the same sick experience

elle nash

@saderotica

5 months

for the spectator, i spoke with blake butler about his new memoir, Molly, and some of the response it’s received on its publication

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

6 months

halloweekend? yes i am hollow and weakened

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

7 months

ryan loved my selfys so i have to keep taking them forever

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

3 months

Do Not Look Up Videos From Shows You Saw With Your Dead Boyfriend Even If You Think It's Just Of The Band Because Sometimes It Turns Out He's In Them Beaming And Singing Along And Then You're Crying In The Amtrak Cafe Car

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CLAUDIA MORALES

@CLAUDIAPOSTING

4 months

i just don't think i should ever have to deal with anythin ever again

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@CLAUDIAPOSTING