So I'm sitting working at my desk and my daughter (6) bursts in wearing her black sequinned party dress and favourite shoes, drops a little mystery envelope into my lap and says "You can come if you want to," then walks right back out.
Very sad to hear Spotify's down today, and that thousands of fans have no access to the music they love. If anyone's looking for a quick alternative, I wholly recommend buying music instead of renting it. Works for me!
Anyone who thinks
@Nigel_Farage
has been censored today clearly doesn't understand what censorship is. He's been sacked by a private company because his obnoxious, extremist views and racist rhetoric are bad for business. Good fucking riddance.
#nigelfarage
The utter contempt in Parliament towards the elected members for Scotland is outrageous. I don't know how anyone can watch that and think the union works.
I'm not going to force that Priti Patel video into your timeline again, but I think it's fair to say that there's nothing more sickening than the smiling, smug face of a rich Tory as she is applauded for narrowing the horizons of the young and the poor.
Most of my neighbours are Muslim (and must've fed us nearly every night of Ramadan!), Glasgow Central Mosque is a vaccine centre for all, and the Muslim community lives predominantly in the south, where I live, and I don't know of a single "no go" area. Total racist pish.
Funny how certain folk are raging at Sturgeon "undermining" Westminster by suggesting an exit strategy, rather than being raging at the Tories for not even thinking about it.
I'm getting abuse from young folk because of my Spotify tweet. Apparently I'm an old man and I'm out of touch. No arguments here, but I fear for a future that thinks a fair wage for workers is controversial. Music has become yet another sweatshop. It could be your job next.
Okay, so I watched the trailer for the Harry & Meghan Netflix show, couldn't help myself. The best thing about it is a shot of Kate Wales looking utterly evil โ they're on the absolute wind-up and it's hilarious. Added to Watch List.
Last word on Royal Blood: this is how you deal with it, and these poor girls got much, much worse.
(We (
@ArabStrapBand
) met them once and they were lovely. Always liked them. And it turns out they're hard as fuck too. Legends.)
Besides being utterly insensitive as 2,200 jobs hang in the balance, this is just puerile music snobbery gone wild. Anyone who thinks the demise of HMV would be anything less than devastating to the UK music industry is a fucking idiot. Shameful.
It's so tone-deaf too. Folk are still losing friends and family to the virus, thousands are unemployed and struggling, everyone and their kids seem to be some kind of depressed, yet we're expected to mourn a figurehead of British privilege and social inequality. GET TAE FUCK
Next week, the UK will likely have the 2nd highest Covid-19 death toll in the world. The reasons are clear: 10 years of Tory austerity and cuts leaving the NHS unprepared, and a slow, muddled response. Yet the government talks of success. Every single one of them should resign.
Finally, at 46 years old, I've reached the sweet spot: I absolutely don't give a fuck about anyone else's album of the year. Music โ like life โ is not a competition. Love what you love, and who gives a fuck. The End.
Anti-vaxxers โ so proud of their own "research" โ storming the wrong building because nobody thought to research the fucking address is just about the best and funniest metaphor we could hope for. Absolute dolts.
Arab Strap played 17 festivals in 2017 โ half of which were in EU. We couldn't have afforded to play any of them without being EU citizens. That's more than half our market cut off from us. So fuck Brexit, fuck the Tories, fuck blue passports and their xenophobic empire pish.
Ha ha, I'm getting some right abuse from
#NigelFarage
fans because of that last tweet, none of whom seem to understand that I couldn't give a single, solitary fuck what any of them think.
My (5-year-old) daughter has just announced that her career plans are to be a vet and a rock star, and her band will be called Roxy & The Foxes. I will now dedicate my life to making this happen.
Can't stop watching that Royal Blood clip ... When you play a festival, not everyone's going to like you โ I know, I've been there (27 years now! gulp) โ so you take it on the chin and focus on those who do. Or, to put it in plainer language: Fuck up ya wee wank
I don't know what Scotland's future will bring, but I do know it'll be decided by the people who live here, and not some old, ex-pat, right-wing, climate-denying, Tory millionaire prick.
Once again,
@BBCNews
is a fucking disgrace. Just heard a radio piece on the
#Brexit
developments and their one soundbite is from fucking
@Nigel_Farage
. With no real balance or impartiality, they're 100% complicit in our current shitstorm. Sack the fucking lot of them.
I'm in the toilet at a party and there's a couple of guys talking about Arab Strap and Chemikal Underground outside. Do I wait until they've gone or do I jump out singing with jazz hands?
Just spent ages trying to find something to watch on Netflix. What a fucking chore their interface is. And as for their recommendations โ I can't think of a single fucking thing I've watched that would make even the hint of a suggestion that I'd EVER like FUCKING TOP GEAR.
Wondering why Nick Cave fans are sad today? It's because he apparently endorses an archaic system of inherited wealth and power that promotes social inequality and economic oppression, and a ruthless establishment built on murder, plunder and slavery. Hope that helps! ๐
Heartbroken to hear about Mimi from
@lowtheband
. She leaves behind some of the most glorious, gorgeous, moving songs Iโve ever heard. Love to Alan and all.
There's a certain tweet going around comparing Greta Thunberg with a Nazi, and it's absolutely disgusting. But rather than give it the oxygen it desperately needs by retweeting and making a comment, I've just reported it for abuse. If you see it, please do the same.
"But it's only possible because of the UK!" scream critics of Scotland's NHS pay rise. You know what else is only possible because of the UK? Even more nuclear weapons in Scotland. So away an fuck yersel.
With his own singular bands and countless engineering credits, thereโs no name that appears throughout my record collection more than Steve Albini; his influence still informs how I make and release music today. 61 is no fucking age at all. RIP indeed.
OMG it's the ROYAL WEDDING TOMORROW!!! I can't wait to completely fucking ignore it and wish we lived in a democratic republic that wasn't desperately trying to hang on to its ugly imperialist past.
#RoyalWedding
I mean, is it really so controversial to want your country to be guided by the people who live there? Just about every other country in the world does it โ indeed 65 of them gained independence from Britain. Nothing unusual about it.
Okay, Iโve been drinking, and I know we might not all agree on everything, but you humans are all beautiful and brilliant. Letโs all move forward with love.
Except the Tories. Theyโre cunts.
ยฃ442 for a Bruce Springsteen ticket? "Dynamic pricing" is disgusting.
@Ticketmaster
,
@LiveNationUK
et al should all be boycotted until they stop this nonsense.
So aye, turns out we (
@ArabStrapBand
) got to
#14
in the proper album chart โ shunted out the Top 10 by last-minute streaming figures from Lewis Capaldi, Ed Sheeran, and Harry Styles! Jammy young bastards. RAGING*
(*not at all, all good!)
Anyone else starting to get annoyed at celebrities sending positive isolation vibes from their massive houses with massive gardens? I don't expect cabin fever's much of a problem when you own a whole forest. I live in a top floor flat with two children, happy to swap anytime.
What's the fucking point in televised fucking leaders' debates when only 200,000 fucking Tory cunts get to choose what fucking Tory cunt gets to be the top fucking Tory cunt? Fuck the fucking lot of them. Cunts.
I see the old Beatles vs. Stones argument has resurfaced, but please remember musicโs not a competition; thereโs a place for everyone. And the place for the Rolling Stones is the fucking bin.
There are thousands, if not millions, of far more sexually explicit pop videos than that Sam Smith one. Most of them will feature young girls.
It must be exhausting being so hateful all the time. And to be so utterly terrified of difference.
I was just reading about a racist attack on an easyJet flight to Turkey and now I' wondering why a racist would even bother going on holiday. If you hate folk from other parts of the world, you should probably do a staycation. Preferably in the fucking sea.
... and then Johnson takes a swipe at Ian Blackford's weight. Utter fucking contempt for Scotland. In fact, utter fucking contempt for anyone who doesn't vote Tory. I have never hated a government so much.
If you ask me, I think all exams should be scrapped. Pupils should be continually assessed on smaller tests and course work as they go, and not be forced to focus on one day when anything could happen. Less mental stress that way too. (I failed all my exams, by the way.)
Polls are often wrong, but 58% for independence is quite incredible, and there are rumblings in Ireland and Wales too. It really does seem that Britain is falling apart, and the delicious irony is that it's the Tories' fault. I only wish we could take half of England with us.
I've never even heard a Ryan Adams song, but I do know that if you're a 40-year-old man who needs to ask a girl for ID before you get your cock out, you should probably be in jail.
I've been at home with my young daughter all day, and because I can't do it at home, please allow me to scream this here:
FUCK ALVIN AND HIS FUCKING WEE CHIPMUNK CUNTS
I'm no SNP fanboy, but they do sometimes seem like the only party that's taking Brexit seriously. Compare their statements today with David Davis and Boris Johnson. Or Corbyn, for that matter.
Apologies for all the Arab Strap RTs, but it's not very often we make a new record. Don't worry, it's out tomorrow, so I'll be back to swearing and moaning about Tories next week.
I'm trying to think of a snappy, pithy comment about
@Nigel_Farage
on
#bbcqt
but all I can think of is cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt
Tell you what, though โ if Sturgeon is forced to resign in a world where the transparently corrupt likes of Trump and Johnson act with impunity, apparently because she didn't help her old boss hide his alleged sex crimes, then that says something pretty awful about Britain today.
Turns out where I'm meant to be is the BBC! The folk film I made with
@PaulFegan_
in 2016, Where You're Meant To Be, is on the
@BBCScotland
channel this Saturday at 22:15, then on the iPlayer for a whole year! Mind cover the weans' ears.
>>
Tell you what, my kitchenโs going to feel very odd without
@marcrileydj
to keep me company as I make the tea. To say the showโs an institution is beyond understatement. I suppose everything changes eventually, but I kind of thought it would always be there. Hereโs to ye! ๐บ
We live in a world where any act of kindness is dismissed as "virtue signalling" now; to the right, compassion is a crime. But a reckoning always comes, and I can't wait to join my children as we dance and piss on the graves of the hateful, hand-in-hand and high on humanity.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
No surprises: Johnson's an unrelatable privileged cunt.
Final verdict: Sturgeon is in a class of politician all her own; LibDems should never be trusted ever again; and while I think Corbyn's a mess, I still hope all my English pals vote for him because we need the Tories gone.
Thanks again to everyone tweeting about the
@ArabStrapBand
album today, it's been amazing! But special thanks, of course, to
@mogwaiband
and
@rockactionrecs
for making sure the album finds your ears. CHEERS! ๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป๐ป
Wow. Woke up this morning to find a couple of very scared and apparently emasculated men in my timeline because I dared to suggest the women's football had a better, more civilised atmosphere. Well done proving me right, ya fuds.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
@Nigel_Farage
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
๐งตโฌ๏ธ
Had my phone stolen in London tonight, snatched from my grip outside the Theatre Royal Haymarket, by a masked man on a fat-tyre bike. Chasing was futile โ I even watched him pluck another phone from someone else's fist a few metres down the road before he disappeared. /1
Just powered through some mad topless bams on Union Street. The station toilets are awful. Litter on the streets everywhere. Glasgowโs in a right fucking state, especially at the point where many people first see it. No wonder it doubles for Gotham in films.
That John Lewis ad is so moving! Nothing says Christmas like watching a millionaire remember how he made his millions. Absolutely welling up here. ๐ข๐
When scientists call for a lockdown, listen to them.
When nurses say they're at breaking point, listen to them.
When teachers want to close schools, listen to them.
When someone with no experience of any of these fields expresses an uninformed opinion, fuck them right off.
TODAYโS THE DAY! The day Scotland watches how utterly powerless we are; forcibly stripped of EU Citizenship by a Tory government we didnโt vote for, led by a demonstrably racist, sexist, bigoted, privileged pig. Donโt know about you, but Iโm thinking we should bolt this UK pish.
What a day to be a UK musician! The government refuses to help with access to a massive, essential market while major labels look set to continue their streaming oligarchy unchecked. Protect the wealthy, ignore the plebs. Textbook Tory. No surprise.
I was a young teen when this beauty caught me eye; flicked through and fell in love. Still the most original and innovative book of stories I've ever read. Until today, Gray was Scotland's greatest living artist; now he deserves a public holiday and a West End statue. At least.
I was going to retweet an obnoxious and offensive comment about Greta Thunberg โ you know the thing, she's disturbed, weird, etc. โ and add a pithy comment, but you know what? Fuck these arseholes, let's not give them the oxygen they need. Long story short: they're all scum.
Just saw a talkRADIO video in which Neil Oliver claims his views are being silenced and debate is being stifled in Scotland, and he feels he can't speak out. As of now, the video has had 84,573 views, and talkRADIO has 2.7 million daily listeners. Aye, it's like the DPRK up here.
Thanks to everyone sending very kind words about me and
@rmhubbert
's album today. We're seeing them all, but today's not a day for celebration. Normal service resumed Monday. Cheers.
Raising a glass tonight to Big John from Sleazy's, the best doorman a pub could hope for, a solid gold gent with the mightiest laugh, who left us today. (And he only barred me once!) Slainte! ๐ฅ
No matter how many times I hear The Clash โ from Should I Stay or Should I Go to White Riot, from London's Burning to Rock the Casbah โ I'm always taken aback by the sheer lack of fucks I give it about them and the dreadful noise they made.