Satbir Singh @thesatbir Twitter profile

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Satbir Singh

3 years

BREAKING Delhi colleges refuse Pfizer and Moderna vaccines for their students. Say 90% and 94.5% do not meet cutoff requirements.

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Last Seen Profiles

@CatalinTudose5

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@RanaKikaa

@Aftab_Iqbal1

@HomertonBari

@fedexfield

Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

This is perhaps my most favourite part of any interview I’ve ever seen. Mr Bean, Rowan Atkinson at his best.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

1 year

A Punjabi lad singing Kesariya in Malayalam, Tamil, Kannada, Telugu and Hindi. I don’t know how well as I don’t know southern languages but sounds fabulous. Learning more languages is a beautiful thing. Anyone knows who is he? #IncredibleIndia

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

After IIT, he’ll go to IIM.

Dr. Aloke Patnaik MD

@draloke

2 years

Leopard inside IIT Bombay campus. Sent by my son Sarthak who is doing his Mtech there.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

1 month

Store owners, if you employ security staff, please give them a chair. Many are middle aged (early retirement from armed forces etc) and are on their feet at the same spot from 10am to 9-10pm. Every day. Torture.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

Rishi Sunak’s grandfather is from Gujranwala (undivided India, now in Pakistan). Moved to Kenya in 1930s. Father born in Kenya. Mom in Tanzania. How’s the happiness in those countries?

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Many reasonably ok salaried middle class families are just one death (of the breadwinner) away from slipping into near poverty. Negligible savings, EMIs, rent, school fees mean thousands are facing this because of the virus.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

9 months

The second most useless feature in a car. First being electrically-adjusted driver’s seat.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Farmers feeding policemen. Hum sab ek hi desh ke nagarik hain. Pyar baant-te raho.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

🙄 In India, we’ve been eating in them since 5000 BC or something like that.

Mashable

@mashable

5 years

These disposable plates are made entirely out of leaves 🍃🍽

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

8 months

Receptionist to CEO: “Sir, people from CBI are here. They are in conference room” CEO, CFO quickly destroy all financial papers and go to meet CBI officials. CBI official: “hello sir, wanted to invite you to our annual function. We are from Confederation of Bharatiya Industry.”

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

The Girl With The Kamalam Tattoo.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

Sat in front of a news channel at the airport. Shifted next to a garbage can. Much better.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

The biggest advantage of working from home, garam khana. (Not reheated wala garam.) Rali-mili dal, alu-gobhi matar sabzi, phulke.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Next Bharat Ratna should go to the selfless volunteer. Organising oxygen, cremating the dead, turning livelihood-earning auto rickshaws into free ambulances, serving food at homes of patients. Man, a billion salutes to these men and women. Incredible love of humanity. 🙏 #Covid

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

On World Tourism Day, sharing an ad from a campaign I wrote 20 years ago! #IncredibleIndia

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

What is remarkable about this Jaspal Bhatti piece on sale/purchase of MLAs isn’t that it is still relevant, it’s that it ran on the state-run Doordarshan without him being thrown in jail.

BHAIRAVI GOSWAMI

@bhairavigoswami

5 years

Jaspal Bhatti show 15 yrs ago. Has anything changed today???

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

When you want to say ‘trust me’ you don’t use social media like, umm, WhatsApp. You use print.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

It’s oxygen right now. In 25-30 years, we’re going to run out of water in many parts of the country and the world. And that’ll be a permanent shortage. Think of it.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

6 years

What Daler paaji did 20 years ago, the world does today.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Who loves a good triangular namak ajwain wala (or as I know it, loon-join) parantha?

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Finally, shahi paneer and phulke. Ab koi chai pila de bus.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

“It does not matar, sir. Peas curry on.”

Arun Bothra 🇮🇳

@arunbothra

2 years

Security staff at Jaipur airport asked to open my handbag 😐

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Women in Bollywood making unequivocal statements. Men mistakenly liking and unliking social media statuses.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

No one can match the footwork of burly sardars!

Learn Punjabi

@learnpunjabi

5 years

No Punjabi wedding is complete without a #Bhangra performance. These guys killed it featuring @GSidhuOnline

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

The most confounding rule: 100% occupancy in flight (maskless eating included), alternate seating in a crowded bus upon landing. Someone please explain.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

What person are you: RT for lassi. Like for chhachh.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Meanwhile, spilled half a litre of aam ke achar wala tel on tablecloth. Need a new identity and safe house before Mrs Singh sees it.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Anyone here loves these?! Cheese slice sandwiches made in those handheld sandwich toasters. RT for with onion. Like for plain.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

He will not move and I will not honk. #padosibhina

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

This video should’ve been at least 30-min long.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 months

A bunch of Japanese kids at the airport food court added a few more chairs to their table from other tables. Now they’re leaving. And they’ve returned every single chair to its original table.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

As a #Sikh , one very beautiful thing is the slight nod of one’s head and a smile when you notice another. I’ve done it and got it back in NY, Miami, London, Paris, Amsterdam, KL, Chennai. Everywhere I’ve passed one. The extraordinary league of Sikh gentlemen. #SinghNod

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Europeans are like take slab of meat, sprinkle salt and pepper and heat each side for 2 minutes and voila! No wonder, they conquered the world while we were busy making 50-item thalis!

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

23 seconds that’ll burn you more calories than 2 hours’ cardio at the gym. Seriously insane level of fitness. 🙏

Manish MISRA

@manishmisra1980

4 years

@thesatbir Aaj phir ....

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Alu-matar tariwale + bajre ki rotis mean winter is officially here. Mandatory annual post.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

29 days

Who who loves namak-ajwain (Punjabi: loon-join) wale paranthe?

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

Kadhi pakode tip # 1: make 4 times the number of pakode you want in the kadhi. Family members are going to walk into the kitchen on some pretext or the other and before you know, you have no pakode for kadhi left.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Mutton biryani for lunch! Apart from the regular steel, glass, plastic containers for storage in our fridge at home, we seem to have a few of these old ice cream boxes. I was told leftover biryani was in one. Discovered it has aata when opened for lunch in office!

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

What the duck.

Dipanshu Kabra

@ipskabra

4 years

There's no illusion greater than fear. #MondayMotivation .

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

MMS in action, growing economy at 10.08%.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

Punjabis are today top notch MPs in England, Governors/mayors in US, ministers/leaders of opposition in Canada and so on. The heart bleeds when you see the lot on offer in Punjab. They don’t need a Kejriwal to come as a lowly fearmonger.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Chalo bhai, chicken curry ready. RT for with roti. Like for chawal.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Last night was pure poison. Son had massive breathing issues. Had to run around at 1am for his nebuliser medicine. Went to 24-hr chemists at Artemis, Medanta, Cloud 9, finally found it at Paras. We are all doomed for the next two months now.

Rahul Kanwal

@rahulkanwal

5 years

Air pollution in Delhi hits 17 times the healthy limit despite all efforts, India’s capital again covered in toxic haze after a night of Diwali fireworks.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Our balcony, right now. What a magnificent bird.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

The world’s most idiotic idea. Getting kids to run with AQI of about 500. Organisers must be arrested.

ANI

@ANI

4 years

Delhi: A 'Run for Children' was flagged off in the national capital earlier this morning.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Congress can now start planning for 2029 elections. 24 toh gayo.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

9 months

Two NCR pizzerias (Gurgaon’s Da Susy and Vasant Vihar & Amar Colony’s Leo’s) feature in the Top 50 Pizzas Asia Pacific list. Da Susy is fabulous. Have to try Leo’s now.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

A belly is developing. Flattening the curve is being replaced by fattening the curve.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 months

Planning a dinner for 15. 12 non-vegetarian people and 3 vegetarian. That means preparing non-veg food for 12 and veg for 15.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Dedicated to bhindi lovers. Why is it so underrated? Bhindi is super delicious if cooked right without the stickiness. With caramelised sweet onions like this, or stuffed with masala, or tawa fried with lots of dhania powder. Uff!

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Hey 40+ friends, which classic do you want back on tv right now (along with Ramayana): 1) Dekh Bhai Dekh 2) Flop Show 3) Buniyaad 4) Tamas 5) Mr Ya Mrs 6) Old Fox 7) Different Stokes (the sitcom, not the erotic movie) 8) Chitrahar 9) The World This Week 10) Zubaan Sambhal Ke

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Complimentary meals for Covid-affected families in Gurgaon. Home delivered. Very well done, Radisson. 👍🙏

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Are our clients happy? A very happy client sent us this from Calcutta today. This has made us happier than a fat bonus cheque!

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Our 21st. Mrs Singh and I went on a long drive to Khan Mkt (no political statement!) and picked up sandwiches, pizza slice, apple cake slice, coffee. Parked near Lodhi Garden and had our lunch in the car! #AnniversaryInTheTimeOfCovid

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Me: F block. Cabbie: H, sir? M: nahin nahin, F. Apph. Eff. C: X? M: Aff, Ph. फ़. C: स? S? M: ABBEY NAHIN YAAR. EFF. F FOR FARIDABAD. C: Faridabad nahin jayenge, sir.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

11 months

iPhone 14 Pro: Delhi: From ₹129,900 USA: From $999/₹82,500 Difference: ₹47,400 Delhi-New York flight: ₹46,600 Better still: in Dubai: ₹86500. Delhi-Dubai: ₹10,000. Chalein?

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

A half century after they got me vaccinated, I took the parents for their vaccination today.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Wah Taj. Very happy to see drinking water in reusable glass bottles. Of course, for a moment I was delirious with joy thinking these were complimentary vodka bottles. 😎 @TajHotels

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

What’s your desi khana score?

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

Saw a Zomato guy sitting outside our house since yesterday. I asked him why. “Sir, we are dry-running a 1-minute delivery system. Aap phone rakhte hi hum doorbell bajayenge.”

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

ALCOHOL CONTENT Beer: 5% Wine: 12% Whisky: 40% Curd rice: 65% Can’t keep eyes open after lunch.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Mrs Singh called the maid for her salary and she was “didi, kaam to kiya nahin, kis liye paise?” Her husband and son have both lost their jobs. She had to be coaxed.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

A family seriously hurt last night as their car crashes into tractor-trolley carrying rods that pierced their bodies. What can seatbelts and airbags do when trucks, tractors etc can be on highways without lights (and in fast lanes)... Mandatory confiscation, not fines, a must.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

6 years

The Behala Gurdwara is a minute away from the bridge collapse site. Just heard it’s open for assistance to people affected. Langar, tea and water available till rescue is complete. #MajherhatBridge #kolkatabridgecollapse

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Dedicated to all kadhi chawal premis.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Top global cities and their landmarks at night. Paris. Dubai. London. Gurgaon.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

About 12 years ago, took a little over 50 lakh home loan. Paid 50,000+ per month for 140 months. Just checked, I still owe the bank over 50 lakh and need to pay 50,000+ per month for about a 100 more months! Of course, without a loan we’d never get a house, BUT PANCHO!

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Over the next 45 days, clients are going to spend over 2,000 crores on ads on IPL. About 500 crores on celebrities. And, looking at the ads, a couple of crores in creative fees.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Nearly midnight and you’ve some work to finish. You tiptoe into the kitchen so no one is disturbed while you make chai. In slow motion, you take milk out of the fridge and the pateele ka dhakkan falls, spinning on the floor for an hour: TANATAN TOING TOING TOING TOING...

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Normally, in case of death, neighbours, colleagues land up immediately. Relatives come in from all over the world. Someone takes over kitchen. Cremation, tehravi, bhog etc are well attended. Family has support for a couple of weeks. Closure. None of that now. No hugs even.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Please follow my good friend Gurinder Osan (on Instagram), who’s shooting in Tokyo. Some fabulous photos of our athletes.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

125th birth anniversary of grandfather. Freedom fighter. Was imprisoned when Netaji left India. Here, with me.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Daughter (in wheelchair, she’s ok now, precaution) off to college abroad. Because she is going to miss my birthday on 12th, last evening she baked the most amazing luxurious cake ever and pizzas! Already missing her. Sinking in now. And now eyes are moist.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

The biggest threat to modern marriage is the sudden sound on full volume while scrolling down FB/Insta videos post 11pm.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Had launched the Moto Razr in its first avatar in 2004 or so. We got it weeks before launch and would flaunt it at the toniest of places. Have never seen people’s eye pop out on seeing a phone as they did with the Razr. iPhone 100 won’t get those looks.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

One news of a 23,000 challan and I’ve never seen this many bikes getting their pollution certificate. Fewer red light jumps too. It’s a miracle out there.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Eating at home is healthy for tummy and wallet, both. ₹49 for the mixed sprouts. Sautéed with an onion, a tomato, hari mirch, pinch of jeera. Half a nimbu and dhaniya. Two servings. Yum.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

Amongst the most beautiful phones ever made/will be made.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Meet the Mayurs. 📸 MrsSingh

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Not seen giddha this good since the older ladies (mamis and massis) in the family. 👌👌

Learn Punjabi

@learnpunjabi

5 years

If you want to be best, you need to learn from the best. Enjoy this giddha tutorial. #giddha #punjabi

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Flight attendant: Is there a doctor on this flight? Dad: *nudging me* that should've been you Me: Not now Dad Dad: Not asking for an advertising guy to help, are they? Me: Dad, there's a medical emergency happening right now Dad: Go and see if “making the logo smaller" helps

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

This Tanishq bag contains no jewellery but something equally precious: paranthe and pyaz wali bhindi.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

Paris, Hong Kong have Disneyland. Meanwhile, in Gurgaon:

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Dropping a cargo liner loaded with isabgol next to the stranded one in Suez may help unblock the Canal.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

1 year

Not a single foot of the highway divider is free of pan and gutka thook. On both sides.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

At kiddo’s school for progress review. Kids (13/14-yo) meeting after a year. I‘d have thought they’d run, greet each other. But they are awkward and silent like strangers. Children have suffered the most in this Covid era. 7-8hrs of physical activity/socialising is now zero.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Is Kohli giving up endorsing foreign brands like Puma, Uber, etc?

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Any chicken curry (with lots of alu) fan here? And rice.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

5 years

Methiwale paranthe (low ghee) for dinner. I hereby declare winter open.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

How the others wait even after the wheelchair has left till the makeshift ramp is folded and removed.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

If dhol was an Olympic event, this is podium finish.

I b r a h e e m 

@Ibraheeeeem92

3 years

Aik Dafa phr se cc: @TheRebelRise 😁

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

4 years

How I cook mutton: mix grated onion and meat and let it cook till onion juices dry up. This itself will tenderise the meat. Add ghee, crushed garlic, ginger, salt, red chilly powder, turmeric, masalas. Stir till ghee separates. Add hot water and pressure cook. Bon appetit.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

2 years

New ministry announced. Should be very popular.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Who doesn’t love a good baingan ka bharta!

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

Dear brand managers, don’t start thinking and evaluating your available budgets and Covid-impact on your company AFTER the presentation. Fucking do it BEFORE you call for a pitch.

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir

3 years

The world’s easiest Bhangra lesson! Remember smiling is at the core of Bhangra! Happy Diwali!

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Satbir Singh

@thesatbir