Sara Buckley @nottheworstmom Twitter profile

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

When my teenage daughter tries to explain her 90s aesthetic to me

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

me apologizing to my husband: ▶ 🔘──────── 00:02 me apologizing to my kids: ▶ 🔘──────── 00:08 me apologizing to my dog after I stepped on their paw and they made that little *arf* noise: ▶ 🔘──────── 1:27:19

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

I never buy chips because then I’ll eat them, so instead I look in my pantry everyday and am disappointed that I don’t have any chips.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

7 years

*RSVP’ing to Christmas party* Whispering into phone: is it ok if I bring my weird roommate? Husband, from behind me: STOP CALLING ME THAT

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

The password to the Capitol is password.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

There are two types of people in the world: - “It’s already 10pm” and - “It’s only 10pm” and they marry each other.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

These gender reveals are getting out of hand

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

@ItsLumberzack Yes daddy

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

A lone Sharpie lid: one of the most terrifying things a parent can find

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

8 years

My husband wanted me to tease him in the bedroom so we lay down and I start to make fun of his childhood stutter now he's mad wtf

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

It’s my birthday 🎂 Helloooooooooo 33 😏

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

7 years

Sorry I’m late. I was doing absolutely nothing and lost track of time.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Vegas isn’t “back” until the card slappers return to The Strip.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Day 2 of homeschooling: My sons are both suspended pending an investigation and I expelled my daughter.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

WE ALL THINK THIS

New York Post

@nypost

4 years

Ghislaine Maxwell reportedly thinks Epstein was murdered, fears the same fate

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

You have to clean the lint out every time. Otherwise it’s a fire hazard. Not to mention the clothes take longer to dry and it puts stress on the dryer. It also ends up using more energy which costs more money.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

One day you’re young and hot and then BOOM…you have The Weather Channel’s app notifications on.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

No one finds your drunk ass more annoying than your sober significant other.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Losing 5lbs then rewarding myself with 10,000 calories is my toxic trait.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Hi, I’m 34 today 🥳

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

Me: hey babe, can you get me th- Husband: I can’t find it

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

When I say “the good ole days” this is what I mean

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

I talk a lot of shit for someone who cries during Moana.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

8 years

Safe words are for quitters. #5WordSeduction @midnight

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

I literally get high on not closing my teenagers bedroom door all the way so they have to begrudgingly get up and close it themselves.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

After 30, you can’t eat Taco Bell and have sex in the same day.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

Fun fact: Valentines Day was invented by a woman who didn't get what she wanted for Christmas.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Me in the passenger seat after I told my husband I’d be our DD

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

When I was a little girl, I was taught to yell “FIRE” instead of “RAPE” if I was ever being attacked/raped because it was more of a guarantee that someone would come help.... Were any other women taught this??

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

7 years

I didn’t even know it was possible to argue about a topic you agree on until I got married.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

7 years

Whenever my husband tries to talk to me in public I just loudly say "no, I don't have any spare change".

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

8 years

I'm a little curvy, & a lotta pervy.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

My husband has always been the bread winner and provided for our family. To show my gratitude, I'm working as hard as I can to provide so one day he can be a stay at home dad and realize how much fucking easier it is to go to work than deal with this shit.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

If you don’t say COVID-19 to the tune of “come on Eileen”....you do now.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

Jurassic Park was originally titled Parks and Rex.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Not to get political, but N’SYNC will always be superior to Backstreet Boys.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

If your teenage daughter says “no offense but”, know that you are about to get more deeply offended than you even thought possible over something you didn’t care about until she shit on it.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

7 years

Welcome to your 30s, TUMS are now a food group.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

Can you die from a conversation? Because my daughter has been talking to me for 3 hours straight and it feels like you can die from it.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

Whoever DIDN'T tear their genitals bringing the kids into the world has to take out the trash.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

*doesn’t eat lunch* Well, better eat 6 dinners. I’ve earned this.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Welcome to your 30s. You now have upstairs and downstairs ibuprofen.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

My husband talks a lot of shit for someone who falls asleep first.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

Hello, 35 🎂 🥳

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

7 years

How to immediately infuriate your husband: Refer to something that belongs to him as “ours”.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Spent some time with my new Vegas neighbor today @PaulyShore 😉

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

Hear me out: a bar inside Home Depot.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

I am NOT a violent woman, but I heard low rise jeans are making a comeback and I’m TELLING you...I will throw hands ON SIGHT.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

Am I the only wife that makes her husband sleep on the side of the bed closer to the door so if someone breaks in, they kill him first?

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

Me, to my husband: I told the kids “maybe” so you need to get in there and tell them “no”

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

If you wear ripped jeans in front of your dad, there’s a 100% chance he’ll ask “what happened to your pants?”

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

@drewflocka2 Well this is the best shit I’ve seen all week

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

Me: what does mommy always say? Kids, in unison: “that you don’t love us before 9am on a Saturday.” Me: that’s exactly right

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

Person: what does your husband do for a living? Me: he's the President of Putting Up With My Shit.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

Rest In Peace sweet girl 💗

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

How cool would it be if babies never grew out of being swaddled? Like your 9 yr old flips out on you, so you roll him in a rug and he falls asleep.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

I don’t know who needs to hear this but GAINING WEIGHT IS NOT A FAILURE.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

him: what do you want to do for Mother's Day? me: oh i don't care him: please don't do this

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

Me, gagging while trying to take a vitamin: ugh I’m terrible at taking pills 14: we know, that’s why you have three kids

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

The magic of Christmas really shifts when your kids go from writing letters to Santa to giving you a list with a “Mandatory” and “Optional” column.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Me: I wanna get a puppy Husband: no fucking way Me: then can we have another baby? Husband: what breed are you thinking?

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

I swear 98% of being a wife and mother is trying to convince the people you love to take proper care of themselves. The other 2% is hiding your favorite snacks from everyone. ⁣ ⁣

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

I painted my door with blood after giving birth to my first kid and the spirit of Caillou passed over my house, sparing us.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

“Why do you wear makeup? You look better without it.” I also look better without clothes. Mind your fucking business.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Can’t decide if I want to put on The Office or look through Netflix for 20 min first before putting on The Office.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

If you can’t say something nice, say something clever and devastating.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

@itsPKav A classsic one: had a man explain to me the level of pain felt in natural child birth after I told him I birthed two 9+lb babies naturally

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

Him: what do you want for Valentine’s Day? Me: oh I don’t care Him: don’t do this

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

I’d rather be fat than count almonds.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

7 years

Dr: Remember, don’t mix this medicine with alcohol Me: First of all, let’s be realistic

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

As someone who still thought she was married to Tom Cruise, I find this shocking.

E! News

@enews

5 years

After six years together, Jamie Foxx and Katie Holmes have called it quits.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

7 years

Ugh, how drunk was I when I volunteered for this field trip? 9: I don’t know, mom

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

The worst part of parenting is dealing with other parents.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

I had our children with no pain medication so I don't think it's too much to ask that my husband have a natural vasectomy.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Hi

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

“Your yoga pants have never been to yoga” Pump the hate brakes, I don’t harvest in crop tops either.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

6 years

husbands: I am a grown ass man. I don't need your help with everything. also, husbands: my queen, where do we keep "the ice"?

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

3 years

I’m medium pace jogging on the treadmill, and out of 100 open treadmills, an aspiring Olympic sprinter gets on the one right next to me so now I know how guys at urinals feel.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

I’ve made mistakes in life, but the only one I regret is not marrying a massage therapist.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

So this morning I found out my dad has a coat rack by his bed that only holds 15 pairs of his favorite jeans

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

My mental state could best be described as my sock is sliding down inside my shoe, but emotionally

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

4 years

Absolutely disgusted that someone assumed I was a lefty Democrat based on my current views. I am a RED blooded American... who realizes BOTH parties are trash.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom

5 years

Nothing prepares you for the level of hurt you feel when your kids hate your favorite childhood movie.

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Sara Buckley

@nottheworstmom