Iโm receiving some hate because I only streamed 2 days on twitch and got partnered.
I understand frustration, however, I stream 3.5 years on Mixer. I had 40k follows, usually had around 90+ viewers per stream, and I only took one vacation.
I worked hard. Plz let me celebrate.
Yโall really make it hard for women to come out about their abusersโฆ. Mine is walking freeโฆ streaming/ creating content and working in game development apparently.
After todayโฆ idk if Iโll ever feel like my side will be believed, & I know Iโll be blamed too.
This is fucked
I donโt know how to articulate this feeling I have lately but Iโm gonna try:
Some of yโall are supportive of your autistic friends until they start to show REAL HARD parts of it.
There is nothing more lonely than dealing with the hardest part of autism alone.
Yesterday, I knew I needed to speak up because women have been walked all over for so long. So grateful Amber was there to have mine, and Cozy's back, because I know I am not always the most articulate.
Women will not be silenced anymore.
I got told as a 4-year old that "Women should be seen and not heard" by someone very close to me. I refuse to be disrespected as an adult and allow that disrespect to happen to others. Theys/thems/girls/guys never, let someone speak over you, and if you see it, say something.
Shoutout to the people who unfollowed me because I said I wonโt be sleeping with men anymore (due to the Texas abortion ban)โฆ yโall literally didnโt have a chance regardless ๐๐
Just a little reminder:
your neurodivergent friends love when you communicate that we have hurt your feelings, or said something wrong, because 9 times out of 10, we wonโt realize unless you do.
Your ND friends are on your side, just talk to us.
I missed my family for a second, then remembered that last time I spent Xmas with them I received an oven mitt that said โI hate everyoneโ on it. That was the personality trait my family gave meโฆ they truly only ever made me out to be a bad guy, & never actually knew me at all.
Manipulation comes in many forms and itโs very very very hard to see when itโs happening to you.
Itโs not your fault for trusting them. Itโs not your fault for believing in them. Itโs not your fault for giving them the benefit of the doubt.
This is on them.
I just came out to my grandma. I was so scared, and Iโve been avoiding her for 2 years, since I came out to the general public.
She told me she would love me no matter what. I feel like a fool for not having the courage to do it sooner, but I needed this win.
Iโm a puddle.
I cannot believe I have to tweet this:
I am not interested in dating viewers. Ever.
I have been single for 3 days according to your knowledge.
Stay out of my dmโs
Grant me my privacy. I am grieving. We dated a long time. And we still live together.
This is gross behavior.
Good healthy polyamory exists. I promise you it does.
I am just so sick of people using that word to manipulate and lie. Ugh.
Fuck people like this who give it a bad name.
CW: depression
Just finished therapy. She wants me to โจconsiderโจ meds, but Iโm terrified of losing my personality, emotions, & the things that make me, me...
I want to hear from those of you (and only those of you) who have gone on meds. What have yโall experienced?
Some of yโall need to learn the difference between genuine mistakes and people who are genuinely bad.
If you donโt let people fuck up, youโre never going to see anyone grow.
Including yourself.
Happy
#Pride
Month yโall. I wanted to remind yโall Iโm gay af!
Your sexuality, your gender, your personality, you are ALL valid.
If you cannot express yourself fully at home/ at work/ etc, plz know, youโre not alone. Your fellow alphabet mafia is rooting for you. Stay strong!
So I can officially announce this!
Iโm playing the role of Lydia in a table read for a new film called Pride & Mistletoe, at the Lake Travis Film Festival. โจ
โจI am not a therapistโจ I see a therapist for a reason.
Please god, stop dumping your trauma on me. I have triggers!
I am so so so grateful I have cultivated a healing environment for you, but I cannot heal when you trigger me. I deserve to heal too.
Wait.... did we have ANOTHER debate about whether bisexuals are valid or not while my back was turned?!
Yโall. You donโt have to drive every car to know you like cars.
Let people love who they love and worry about yourself.
If I catch anyone of you making jokes about a woman who is clearly being abused, Iโm blocking you.
I donโt care how long we have known each other.
That shit hits too close to home and youโre showing your true colors.
Disgusting,
Just unfollowed a few people on twitch who were playing HL. Surprised I even had anyone on my list who would, but slay, took out the trash. ๐๐ฅโจ
Here how about I just say this:
I hate men.
There are men in my life who understand what I mean by that statement and donโt take offense.
Anyone else can unfollow. I wonโt miss you. Thanks โค๏ธ
I just a reminder, we are still in a pandemic. Please stay home like the considerate people have been since March.
I havenโt seen my grandma in over a year. She sent me 2 Christmas cards bc her memory is so bad...
I would really like to see her again before she forgets me. โ๏ธ
Shoutout to the troll yesterday who called me a โfatassโ because they are SO RIGHTโฆ my ass is fat.
But in all seriousness: their fatphobia has only reminded me how hot & sexy it is to be curvy & have more to grab on to. All bodies are beautiful.
Feeling very powerful today ๐ช
Welp, my dad is not seeing my show because I do not want my abusive mother in the audience.
Very grateful for the chosen family I have.
I would be a wreck but sooo many of my non theatre friends have seen the show already and continue to root me on... sooo fuck em.
We doubled our end of the year (2020) follower goal on stream last night, and then some. ๐ญ
We drank wine, probably got too drunk lol, but had a blast with friends who I am so so so grateful to know.
I am surrounded by incredible people. Wow. My heart is so full.
I want to say thank yโall for respecting my desire to try out she/ they pronouns. I really thought they would fit me, but it doesnโt feel right. Iโm sorry.
I might just be a she/her through and through.
Iโm so grateful yโall have been willing to help me feel this out though.
Itโs not even noon and my notifications are going WILD! I have never had this many people wishing me a happy birthday in my life.
Thank you all! I canโt thank you all individually but please know, I see you, and you have made me feel warm, cared for, appreciated, loved.
TYSM๐ฅบ
In 251 days, we hit 25k followers on Twitch. Thatโs approx 99 followers a day.
When Mixer shut down, I was so scared, so hurt, and so worried Iโd never work in this industry the way I always dreamed. Yet day after day yโall prove me wrong. Iโm so fucking grateful. Thank you.
Gabe made me uncomfy at RTX.
In the moment I didnโt voice it because I thought I was gaslighting myself about it.
I felt like I couldnโt say anything after the fact, because of the power he had in the TTRPG world which is a world I really wanted to get more and more into.
Itโs 3am and I cannot stop thinking about the fact that I organically had 900+ people watching me tonight.
Iโm 99.9% positive I didnโt get raided. That is WILD.
So so so grateful.
Bro. I just want to make new friends on Twitch. I promise I donโt need or want a shoutout! I just want to meet people who I can watch in my downtime or play games with in the future. Deal?
Guess what yโall? I am finally returning to the stage!!!
I have been cast as Kit Kat Club dancer, Helga, in the musical Cabaret at a little community theatre here โจ
Itโs been 5 years since my vocal chord injury / since my last show. Omg how I have missed it โจ