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Google Search Honesty Profile
Google Search Honesty

@googlehonesty

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Parody account 🤡 Google search is NOT a monopoly (please stop saying it is) 💩 Definitely NOT a Googler's burner account 😈

Follow or its a manual penalty
Joined September 2023
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Pinned Tweet
@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
If you thought 2023 was bad, just wait till you see the shit we're gonna pull this year 😬
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
5 months
Earlier today we released the December 2023 core update. This update will roll out mainly to English-speaking countries first. We're calling this one the "steal your Christmas turkey" update. If you notice traffic declines, this might be because you are not Forbes or Reddit.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
5 months
Happy holidays to everyone from the team at Google. Except for SEOs and niche site owners. We hate you.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
What a year 2023 was! 💩niche sites decimated 💩livelihoods ruined 💩businesses bankrupted ✅Reddit posts from 2015 win ✅Big brands ranking at the top of SERPs, recommending themselves win ✅High DR sites win ✅Forbes wins❤️ ✅Parasite SEO wins Let's make 2024 even better!
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
This isn't domain reputation abuse at all. This is a shining example of HelPFuL ConTeNt. 🤡🤡
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
1 month
Earlier today we announced the rollout of the April 2024 Core Algorithm update. It will take approximately two weeks to fully rollout and will impact all countries and all languages. The main purpose of this particular update is to take whatever traffic you still have left.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
23 days
Your content isn’t HeLpFuL enough for us to rank it any higher than position 17 but we’ll happily steal it and use it for SGE 🤡💦
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
5 months
Did you know that Forbes currently ranks at the top of 92.36% of all SERPs on the internet? Instead of complaining about your lackluster rankings, try to learn a thing or two about how they do things. Take for example the "Forbes Advisor" subdirectory of the site.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
Hey we just noticed that you guys are spamming Reddit with your affiliate links and paying for upvotes etc Can you please cut that out? We're trying to run a Reddit-based search engine here and you're making us look bad.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
5 months
Did you know that Google has the power to completely erase ENTIRE businesses overnight, wiping out the livelihoods of everyone who depends on them? 📉 But please don't call us a monopoly. We're trying to pretend we're not a monopoly so we don't lose that power. Thanks!
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
If you're wondering why these updates are only expected to reduce spam by 40% that's because the other 60% of spam on the internet comes from @reddit (43%) and @forbes (17%). We want to leave that spam on the internet for now.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
If @googlesearchc @searchliaison let the likes of @ThisHouseFresh @travellemming and @retro_dodo go under, why would any publisher try to do the right thing? Also, don't bother updating the search quality evaluator guidelines, because they're obviously just a joke.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
All SEOs and niche site owners need to open their eyes to the fact that “helpful content” is all a load of BS. Fact is, Google made the decision to show UGC and big publishers at the top. It doesn’t matter how good your content is - you’ll NEVER have a seat at that table.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
Dear @Reddit We’re sorry for doing this to you. We didn’t realize the spam would be this bad this soon. Sell your shares now if you can. This year isn’t going to end well for you 😬☠️📉
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
16 days
Feel free to fill out our feedback form and we’ll “look at it” 😂🤡
@googlesearchc
Google Search Central
16 days
The March 2024 core update is complete, having ended on April 19. The ranking feedback form is now ready at and will remain open through May 31. We’ve also updated our Debugging drops in Google Search traffic help page here:
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
We’re updating our definition of spam to make things more clear to you, our beloved publisher community. Ahem… effective immediately, anything not published on @Reddit or @Forbes will be considered spam.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
In 2024 can everyone just try to be more like Quora? They really are the gold standard by which EEAT should be measured.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
1 month
Everyone is out of business and applying for jobs at McDonalds and @googlesearchc is like "Here's how to improve your CWV scores so that if someone ever scrolls down far enough to check what's ranking in position 57 your site will be a good experience for them" Tone deaf much?
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
11 days
Thanks to everyone who submitted feedback following the completion of our latest algo update. We didn't bother to read any of them, but just seeing the sheer number of responses gave us a good chuckle. 🤡💩🤮🤬
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
These things definitely don’t work. Just focus on human-first good quality content and we’ll rank Forbes at the top, ok?
@Charles_SEO
Charles Floate 📈
4 months
Things that Google says don't exist/work, but actually, they do: - Negative SEO - Toxic Links - Buying Links - Parasite SEO - Exact Match Domains - Redirects - Reviews That Have Never Used The Product - Spamming
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Just to be clear, paying for printed business cards is against our TOS. Just focus on having a good quality business and other people will organically create business cards for you 🌈
@CyrusShepard
Cyrus SEO
3 months
Google's new SEO starter guide — • Don't focus on PageRank/links • Instead, put your URL on business cards and posters So all you link builders can stop now, we know the secret sauce
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
We are not your friend. But thanks for letting us steal your content for Gemini ❤️
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
"My well-written content with my own experiences, photos and videos is beaten by "User2325" on Reddit with half a sentence... who gives an incorrect answer. Where is the EEAT and high-quality content there?" - quote provided
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
This is just a friendly reminder that we hate you, we hope your website fails and you need to take a job at Mcdonalds. ❤️😘
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Guys there’s a copycat account out there putting out inaccurate advice about how our algorithms work. Obviously, their advice isn’t very helpful, but be careful out there, some people might fall for it. Please help to report this account to protect the sanctity of the web.
@googlesearchc
Google Search Central
3 months
Today we're putting our pencils down and publishing a refreshed SEO Starter Guide, with a better focus on a starter audience. Read more about what changed:
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
“It’s sickening to think that small businesses can be wiped out on the whim of one person taking seconds to glance at a website and clicking 'yes' or 'no' to apply a manual penalty that deindexes the site.” - @NicheSiteLady recent email newsletter
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
HelPfuL CoNtENt 🫠 Credit: @TheEghosa
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
List of all Google Algorithm updates scheduled for the next couple of months. February 3rd - HCU hidden gems rollout begins February 24th - Core update planned March 3rd - Spam update with improved classifier March 17th - Kick you in da nuts update planned
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
13 days
We fired the python team, but we still hiring for other roles if you know any good people.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
We stole all your traffic and gave it to Reddit but at least the login page looks better ❤️❤️
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
1 month
Regarding the domain reputation abuse update that we gave our buddies a couple of months to prepare for, just to make things crystal clear, no, Forbes won't be losing any rankings or traffic. Because, "well, you know, they might be doing lots of other things well"
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
1 month
Google has been steadily losing search market share in the US month after month since July 2023. Lol!
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
We’re coming down hard on third party hosted content, but not in-house crappy content. We’ve rigged this one so that you lose (again) and Forbes stays on top.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Since last September's Helpful Contract Update, there seems to be a lot of confusion from small publishers about how to succeed in Google Search. It's quite easy: 1. Be a big publisher (even better if about to go public) 2. Sign a Helpful Contract with us 3. Rank ✅✅✅
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
It’s nice being able to play God and decide which businesses live and die. Small publishers pouring their hearts into something = die Spam = 🚀🚀 I just hope we don’t ever lose that power or that someone else has the power to decide our fate. That would be terrifying 👀👀
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Official statement: Things aren't as good as they could be, some things are clearly outdated or broken. We want to fix things. That's why over the last couple of weeks we've been working on the appearance of filters in GSC. Now you can see your lack of traffic beautifully
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
1 month
Let’s go @bing 🚀
@Charles_SEO
Charles Floate 📈
1 month
Google has slowly been bleeding US search market share for a while, seems this past 30 days was when we started seeing it really ramping up though.. With bing seeing about 2x growth this year already 👀 Google still dominates, but this is further bad news for the company...
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Just to be clear, yes, having some kind of cart + checkout on your site is a positive ranking factor.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
We’ve been telling you for years: Create quality content and you will be aligned with what our algorithm seeks to reward. That’s why Quora and Reddit are ranking so high in so many SERPs at the moment. They are the go-to place for high quality content with great EEAT ❤️
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Small and medium-sized publishers breaking the rules = 😈💩❌☠️📉 Forbes breaking the rules = 🫶❤️📈
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
I just had someone DM me with an offer to buy this account. But that would be against our TOS, so I slapped him with a manual penalty instead.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
1 month
Hey @googlesearchc can you please start reporting overall search market share each month so that we can all laugh at you and give you some tone-deaf lols like you always do to us? Really can't wait for the inevitable 80... 70... 60... seeya 👋👋 Thanks Paging @bing 🚀🚀🚀
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
For a company that says to go easy on the ads, Google search is an all-out ASSAULT on the user. Just ad after ad. They really make it hard to find Forbes and Reddit 1st and 2nd.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
Guys, can you please cut it out with the parasite stuff? It's already hard enough to arrange the SERPs without you lot making it harder with high DR sites. I've said it before and I'll say it again, just focus on writing quality content and we'll rank Forbes at the top, ok?
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
@Google Either way, we’ll show you a bunch of Reddit threads from 2017 🤝
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
Links don't matter.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
We're making it even easier to find content on Forbes. January 31st will see the launch of "circle to search" which is a new way to begin a search query on select devices. Of course, once a search is initiated, we'll serve the user something from Forbes. Everyone wins.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
We finally got him. @NicheSiteLady you're next 😈
@indexsy
Jacky Chou (buying online businesses up to $1m)
2 months
Oh wow Google finally hit my revenue generating assets Emergency live stream in an hour 👇
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
17 days
Our systems aren't perfect. If you lost all of your traffic and revenue, please bear with us. We'll figure it out eventually. Maybe.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Ok we'll level with you; You never really had a chance. @reddit cracked the Helpful Contract Update cheat code and @forbes gives us money under the table to stay at the top of "best CBD oils". Come on, admit it, if you were us, you would take the money too, right? 😇
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
20 days
When we say that we want a thriving open web, what we mean is that we want Reddit, Quora and Forbes to thrive and everyone else can go to hell
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
I'll be honest, all of those killer updates in the second half of 2023 weren't designed to improve the SERPs, they were designed to hurt niche site owners, SEOs, affiliate marketers and anyone else that tries to make a living online. We're a spiteful bunch here at Google.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
1 month
When we send feedback back to the search team. This is what they do with it 👇
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
WHY would ANY publisher even try to do the right thing anymore?
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Have we reached peak hate for Google yet? The lies, the under-the-table deals, the misdirection, the destruction, the attitude. 🤮🤮🤮🤮
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
With how badly Google broke their golden goose product of search, is there any universe in which they're still a dominant force 10 years from now? Or are they just another Kodak?
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
🚨 Lawsuit 🚨 Is there a potential class action lawsuit if G is declared a monopoly for unfairly gatekeeping search traffic and diverting it away from small and medium-sized publishers whom G was previously rewarding? Manual penalties and declaring sites "pure spam" seem risky.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
This video is baseless. Reddit has great anti-spam measures in place. Just ask user nopants37329, an expert on credit cards, CBD oils, and supplements to give your pets. @authorityhacker
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Did you really expect this update to be good for you???
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
YMYL 💦 I’m surprised @Reddit isn’t at the top for queries about how to do heart surgery with a random thread from 2007. Credit: @MicTheBroker
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
26 days
@googlesearchc And we heard your comments about Reddit and Forbes, but they’re here to stay so get used to it
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
I want to address the rumors that @Reddit gave us their data for a song because we made an under-the-table deal to pump them up ahead of their IPO next month. Whoever figured that out is really smart.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
We care about publishers, we want you to thrive and survive. How else will we be able to steal your content and present it as our own? When we say that we want you to survive, that's true, we just want you to figure out some other way to survive that doesn't depend on us ❤️🦄
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
How's your site doing since the Helpful Contract Update (HCU) rolled out last year? Did you have a helpful contract in place like @reddit ? Or were you caught with your pants down? It's not too late to get a contract with @Google and recover from the HCU 📈📈
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
page 63 of the Search Quality Evaluator Guidelines gives examples of "low-quality content" : a forum post with little discussion or only superficial comments We need to update that to exclude Reddit posts littered with spammed affiliate links - they're still high quality 🚀🚀
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
I've really had enough of all of the negativity from people lately. Can't you just say nice things and give us praise? We can make mistakes, use AI, steal content and have terrible UX, but you can't and THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS. Deal with it and ONLY share positivity🌈👫❤️
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
I know we’ve been quiet for a while and that’s because we wanted to take our time to think about your feedback rather than put something out that’s not fully baked. So here is our official announcement on all of the things that you’ve mentioned recently. Ahem.. We don’t care.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
Hey @forbes is this the one that you wanted ranked #1 for “best AI tools for creators”? Struggling to keep up lately sorry.
@Forbes
Forbes
4 months
9 AI Tools Every Creator Must Know About
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Ok, we've been in bed with @reddit for a while now. So what?! Are you surprised? They need to secure the bad on their IPO and we need to secure the data for our AI models. It's a match made in heaven 😇
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
I wouldn't want to be @searchliaison or @googlesearchc at the moment. With all the hate that we have for the company they work for, let's take the high road and not make things personal. But man, what a job to have when everything Google says seems to be total BS.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
@googlesearchc Guys, please be nice. Anyone posting anything negative here will receive a manual penalty.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Instead of complaining about why your site isn't performing well in organic search anymore, just focus on creating helpful content, printing business cards, and inking contracts to sell us your data to feed our AI and you might see your rankings improve.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
23 days
The Verge piece last year was embarrassing and was the trigger for the major shakeups in search over the last 6-8 months. But when @elonmusk embarrasses us like he did today that might just be the catalyst for another big change. Please don’t embarrass us. It’s hurtful.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
1 month
Indexing in a nutshell: If you’re @Reddit or @Forbes welcome ❤️ If you’re not, we’re full already, sorry.
@googlesearchc
Google Search Central
1 month
Welcome back to #HowSearchWorks with @methode . In this week’s episode Gary covers how Search Console processes and analyzes a page’s content to help decide whether or not a page should be indexed. → #GoogleSearch
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
I'm more confused after reading this. Let me break it down for you in simple terms. If you want to rank, it's really quite straightforward: - pay for backlinks - be Forbes - pay for printed business cards - say negative things about your competitors out loud
@searchliaison
Google SearchLiaison
3 months
@AndrewGirdwood @rustybrick Honestly, I'm at a loss sometimes what else to say. We get asked things like: Is EEAT a ranking signal? And say "No, EEAT is not a ranking signal" And people go "Well, what does ranking really mean. Maybe it's signals? They didn't say it's not signals!" So do we have a signal…
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
HelPFuL coNTeNt 🫠 credit @Gsmheadlines
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
@googlesearchc Also, please keep in mind that if your "performance" report still shows any clicks or impressions, we're working on reducing them all to zero soon.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Heads up: BIG update incoming 📉😈
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
Great EEAT, or in this case, just EAT sauce
@Ldnbox
Alek Asaduryan
4 months
Did they try these BBQ sauces?
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
💡Did you know that you aren't a real SEO unless you're blocked by @JohnMu
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
"There is nothing to do with helpful content or the like. Google is a monopoly and it has changed the whole landscape of what to rank in its search. Unfortunately, due to its 90% dominance in the search game, there is nothing we can do to save our search traffic unless other..
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
5 months
Are you seeing any movement in rankings following the release of our "Steal your Christmas Turkey" update yesterday? 😝 Oh boy, that was a good one, I can't wait for April Fools Day 😇
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Damn it @reddit get up would you 📈📈📈 We didn't pump your spam-filled thin content to the top of the SERPs for nothing. We want those shares you gave @sundarpichai under the table to be worth something.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
We want to work more closely with YOU, the wonderful SEO and niche site community. We truly value your contribution to a thriving open web and want to support you in more ways. To that end, I would like to ask: What changes do you suggest we make this year? 👫🫶
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
Hey @Forbes we're going to have to renegotiate the monthly retainer sorry guys. 1m a month isn't enough anymore. Too many people are asking questions, even inside our company. If you want to continue on "halo" mode, it's going to have to be 1.5m/month from February.
@AzeemDigital
Azeem
4 months
Forbes rank very well for "when will the marvels be on disney plus?" Click, open URL, invited to read more and scroll past the ads only to find out...THEY'RE NOT SURE! As a user, this is a bad experience. I often wonder how pieces like this continue to be successful in SERPs...
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Don't even think about paying for links or paying for printed business cards and definitely don't think about talking about your website in public if it's just to manipulate our algorithm. None of these are ranking factors, but our quality raters are looking for these signals.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Everything will be deleted, but nothing will be deleted. At least it’s Reddit I guess. Helpful content in the wild provided by @AkarshK10
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
@AzeemDigital No this is actually a very helpful result. Forbes can do no wrong as far as we’re concerned. We’re going to start ranking them for “buy dishwashers online Barcelona” next week.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Gemini will take all of your traffic
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
New slogan idea: "Be evil" What do you think?
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Speaking aloud your website domain one letter at a time is ok if it happens organically, but not ok if you're doing it to try to manipulate our algorithm.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
Honestly, the official account is getting so beat up at the moment I actually feel a bit sorry for them and want to give them a break. It's like they provide too much fodder for comedy. It's kinda sad
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
3 months
Wait a minute, are you telling me that some of those upvotes on Reddit aren't real?? Oh no, our engineers aren't going to like this...
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
When will the board fire @sundarpichai for taking the single best business in the history of mankind and throwing it in the toilet?
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Whaaaaaaat?! @Forbes writers are not the holy grail of E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-A-T experts? Heaven forbid! 😱😱😱😱
@MarkHansen
Mark Hansen
2 months
@googlehonesty Aw cmon. One of the writer profiles on a different page leads to a LinkedIn profile where they say the quiet part outloud.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
6 months
@SeanDoesLife @JohnMu @searchliaison Happy to provide an official response for you on this matter Sean. Here’s the thing, SI are a high DR site. I hope that clears things up.
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
4 months
If our results are 💩we don’t need raters to tell us so.
@CyrusShepard
Cyrus SEO
4 months
BIG shakeup for Google Quality Raters Google cancels contract with Appen/RaterLabs (the company that employs me as a Quality Rater) No idea what this means to the Quality Rater program
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Keep it on the low down, but I heard on the grapevine that Danny has voiced concerns about the disconnect between guidance and the current reality of the SERPs and some are speculating he may not be in the picture for much longer
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
Great news, Google was voted the MOST LOVED business in the entire world 👏👏👏 We always knew we were great, but it's nice to make it official. Voting comprised of ONE vote, which we cast ourselves. It's nice to have a monopoly on search AND voting 🫦
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@googlehonesty
Google Search Honesty
2 months
With so much negative press and hate lately, it seems like a lot of the Google accounts have gone into their shell lately. But don't worry, I'm still here to bring you the unfiltered truth from Google 🤠
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