Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛ @faera_lane Twitter profile

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

9 months

Pinned tweet for 2024 | Book Cover commissions 📚 As of January 2024, I only have a few spots left from September to December 2024, but my DMs are always open for work inquires! Website: Rates: FB: …

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 years

"Cats have been messing shit up since the dawn of time" is my favorite brand of archeology

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Recovering people pleasers will be like "I am in my villain era!" and it's just politely drawing healthy boundaries.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

My theory is we don't actually grow more confident with age, we just get more & more exhausted until caring what others think simply takes up too much energy. You don't like how I live my life? Please be quiet I have not slept properly since 9th grade.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

Twitter: where folks can get angry at you about naming a pet Marmalade, or, naming a pet at all! 🙃

Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

I love pets named after random objects. Your lizard is named Xerox? Banger. Your cat is named Apple Strudel? Peak name. Bird called Lord Pianoforte? Epic.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Hot girl summer is over. Gothic heroine autumn is here. We're wearing our flowiest nightgowns and carrying flickering candles down long dark corridors to certain doom.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 years

Everyone wants a Goth GF until they realize we basically only look like Queens of the Night™ 10% of the time, and the rest is spent lurking around in Nightmare Before Christmas pajamas & hissing until we get snacks.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

4 years

A down on their luck private eye with a bad reputation only they are a woman and she dresses like this

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 years

I have said it before and I will say it again, modern bathtubs are too damn small. I want to feel like the kraken moving ponderously through ocean depths, not like a potato wedged in a tailpipe.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 years

nobody speak to me I'm staring at this dress

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

9 months

"I just want someone to take care of me for once" babe you have trauma-induced hyper independence & won't even let someone open a jar of pickles for you

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 months

Officially 30 today 🎂🖤 RIP to my 20's 💀

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

4 months

Egad, a beautiful plus-sized model on a magazine cover. I am sure men on the internet are about to be completely normal about this!

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Introverts in public: yeah I'm just super quiet and reserved Introverts alone at home: *stripper dancing in their kitchen at 2am with a disgruntled cat in one hand and a jar of peanut butter in the other*

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

I love pets named after random objects. Your lizard is named Xerox? Banger. Your cat is named Apple Strudel? Peak name. Bird called Lord Pianoforte? Epic.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

So I... did a thing 🥀

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

If you ever feel like the annoying friend, just remember that Hans Christian Andersen once forced himself into Charles Dickens' home, subjected him to incessant fanboying, lay openly sobbing on his front lawn, and overstayed for 3 weeks before making a dramatic weepy departure.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 months

Does anyone else remember when we collectively became obsessed with sea shanties for like 2 weeks?

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

1 year

Ya gurl is 29 today 🎂✨

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

So. I got a hair cut. ✨

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

4 months

This picture holds so many insecurities for me. I've always been made to dislike my smile, my profile, etc. But this was a joyful moment, and I'm not going to let the ghosts of abuses past rob me of that. Side note, you'll never guess what made me giggle

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

When you're trying to take an artsy b&w photo but the cat has other ideas 😼

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 months

Men getting mad about the bear question are a red flag, full stop

LT (Liz) Ward📚

@LTWard2

5 months

I will always choose the bear.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 years

What men think women calling themselves a goddess mean: Earth mother, probs in a toga, likes bubble baths What we actually mean: Chaotic cosmic star-swallowing destroyer of empires, demands blood sacrifice, has vast leathery wings that span the universe, likes bubble baths

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

20 days

Every time people try to use disability or poverty to say that AI theft of art and jobs is actually necessary, I sit on my disabled ass in my poverty stricken hovel with my art career I clawed out of nothing and I snort with so much derision it scares the cat. Shut the fuck up.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Just realized I'm looking very stereotypically Canadian today 😂🍁

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

I just accidentally typed "dreadlines" instead of "deadlines" and honestly, dreadlines works better I'll be using that from now on

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Out for holiday lunch & a movie with family. I may have eaten too much cake.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Just a reminder that I have a face and sometimes I actually like it 🖤

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Wanted to share this recent cover I created for @QuillandCrow 🖤🖤🖤

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

1 year

Eventually, I always go back to the dark side 💙🖤

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

This Tuesday really just feels suspiciously like two Mondays in a trench coat

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

4 years

I could write a thesis on how the Addams family are one of the most well adjusted families ever to be depicted in fiction and this is the hill I will die on

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

4 years

Dude we'd use you as bait

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

7 months

The 3 kinds of book hoarder: 1: Aesthetic. Organized. Bookstagram ready shelves with spines arranged in coordinating colors 2: Chaotic. Books wildly stacked, crammed, & piled on every available surface. Full goblin mode 3: Kindle with 3,000,000 books you have not read yet

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

9 months

When you're Canadian but also spooky

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 months

Turns out what I thought was a nervous stomach disorder is a giant gallstone. Big fan of morphine right now.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

It's always the men who look like they haven't bathed in weeks 😂

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

10 months

I am being judged for eating my grilled cheese sandwiches with ketchup. I can't be the only one who does this, right?

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

No more Twitter crushes. Only Twitter nemeses. I will meet you at sunrise on neutral ground, sword in hand, and we will duel to the bitter end.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Felt like it was time for a change 🖤 #NewProfilePic

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

1 year

Can't decide if I look like a lumberjack witch or tangentially related to the Winchester brothers

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Everyone screaming about the looming annihilation of twitter by tweeting on twitter is honestly the most twitter thing to ever happen

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Those who fear tall women are cowards. If you cannot handle a lady looming like slenderman in platform heels, just admit you're unworthy.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

1 year

I like my coffee cold, like my heart 🫀

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 years

We need to bring cloaks back into style immediately.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

12 days

New phone, new camera. I can now capture my corporeal form in humbling detail. Behold, lint!

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 years

Nobody move. My mother has found my twitter.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

4 years

If anyone needs an emotional support canadian, I have hot chocolate and cookies and pillows just screaming too

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

If you know someone who is characterized as 'resilient', chances are they need a hug right about now

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

10 months

First time on a train

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 years

Demon: *possess my body for roughly 15 seconds* Demon: "you live like this???"

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

I do not miss dating, however I do occasionally look back fondly on that one time I broke a man with what I thought was a complement...

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

23 days

Spooky Season starts when I say it does #NewProfilePic 🥀

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

@RayEvansEditor They really went to bat for a cat that does not even exist

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

10 months

Just your average vampire out doing errands

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

Watching the Wonka movie and it's cute enough, but I feel like Chalamet's portrayal lacks the unhinged menace of a man who would murder children in a carnival of horrors for the unforgivable crime of being annoying.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

10 months

Have I earned this cookie? No. Will that stop me? Also no.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 years

It's Monday and a man has already asked if he can eat cereal off of me. Surely this cannot get any worse.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Yes I'm posting another superfluous selfie. I do what I want.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Kinda look like I should be an extra in an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer today and I'm not mad at it

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 years

Whenever I see these "would you stay in a haunted house for xxx amount of money"... My broke millennial carcass would move into that thing permanently, for free. The ghosts would be trapped in there with ME, not the other way around.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 months

We are the weirdos, mister 🗡

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

11 months

Happy Halloween, ghosts & ghouls💀

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

*Glaring at Twitter* You're gonna make me thirst trap on a Sunday afternoon just to get minimal engagement, aren't you 😒

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

@HvyMetalFaerie This reads like the most unhinged grocery list. I love it.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

So after all of the Rapture fanatics get beamed up, do the rest of us heathens get to finally live in peace?

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Always knew I was just one fake eyebrow scar away from turning into a cartoon villain

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Lashes so big I can't see my problems

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

1 year

Feelin' hexy 🔮

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

I can understand the sentiments of outrage being circulated, but isn't every social media platform we use owned by some morally bankrupt billionaire as it is?

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

There are few things more powerful than a fat person in a crop top. Sorry not sorry 😎

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

4 types of people on twitter right now 1: That was the last straw, I am leaving! Good day, sir! 2: s a d 3: indifferent/oblivious 4: I will toast marshmallows on this app's burning carcass, then cackle as I vanish into the night sky in a murder of vengeful crows!!!!

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

1 year

Finally, some tank top weather 🌻

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Friendship between two anxious people is just asking each other "r u mad at me" forever until you die

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Every time an angry little man on this app calls me fat as an insult, I grow more powerful 🥰

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Sometimes deconstructing internalized fatphobia is realizing all the clothing we were told didn't "flatter" us actually looks pretty damn good on a fat body

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Somebody told me yesterday they followed me thinking I was just a selfie account, and were surprised to find I actually... run a business and sometimes talk about stuff. So, figured an introduction was in order for anyone else who's confused 👋

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 years

These "hey" guys in DMs would have way more success if they instead opened with, "Dear madame, I have business of the utmost secrecy and nefarious importance to discuss with you. It is possibly a matter of life and death. Please respond before midnight or all is lost" Just sayin

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

1 month

Retouched the red in my hair. Feeling more like myself again 🫀

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

4 months

Every time I start to feel weighed down by despair, orcas sink another yacht and I am reminded that there is still some good in this world.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

25 days

Yes. I am fat. I am also under your floors. I will crawl out in the dead of night and eat you feet first before slithering back into hell.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

24 days

Men will be like, "I bet a girl like you gets into all kinds of wild trouble 😏" meanwhile I am very excited because a shelving unit I ordered will arrive today and I cannot wait to build it and then reorganize my bathroom. This is the highlight of my week.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 years

Leveled up to 27 years old today so as is custom I shall be spending the next 24 hours working myself into a cake-induced coma 💜🖤🎂

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

4 years

is anyone gonna tell this man about the origins of Samhain or...?

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 years

People who wake up perky cannot be trusted. If it takes less than 45 minutes to fully adjust your human facade, you are highly suspect.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 months

It's a toss-up between vampire and witch 🫀

The Redheaded libertarian

@TRHLofficial

2 months

Every woman looks like a vampire, a witch, a mermaid, or a fairy. Ladies, which are you?

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

3 years

Dudes be like, "I prefer Natural makeup." Sorry Steve, not going for "Natural", I'm aiming for Supernatural. I wanna look like I just crawled out of an eldritch bog lair on my way to devour the village misogynists. This is full face feral cryptid. Deal with it.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

I'm a bad influence in all the best ways 😈

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

8 months

If you are watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer for the first time and your first reaction is to thirst after Giles and Spike: congratulations, you made the correct choices. Also, you 100% need therapy.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

9 months

Rare photo of a vampire in her lair aka, the freelancer at her desk

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

I'm tired, grumpy, & inundated with gross comments about my body cuz I shared a good moment on social media. To the lovely respectful folks on here (you know who you are) I appreciate you 🖤 Everybody else, kindly fuck off.

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

6 months

@vulgarweed I had a cat named Bruno but we called him Brunolicious at the vet specifically to humble him

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

The Winter Solstice is upon us, and I'm appropriately caffeinated 🖤❄🖤

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Leather jacket? Check ✔ Caffeine? Check ✔ Simmering homicidal rage momentarily quelled? TBD

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

8 months

I have Gothicc in my bio for a reason

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Been under the weather for a few days, finally starting to feel more myself again ✨

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

5 years

Being a writer with too many ideas who barely writes is like having a closet full of clothes and saying you have nothing to wear. It's all THERE we're just oVeRWheLmEd

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 months

It's too hot out to be goth, yet we persist

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

If you cannot love me in my disheveled pajama-clad midnight snack goblin form you don't deserve me at my gothic glam succubus queen of the underworld best

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Fay Lane 🐈‍⬛

@faera_lane

2 years

Tis the damn season. Happy Yule!🎄

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