eric curtin @dubstep4dads Twitter profile

Pinned Tweet

eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

3 years

my dentist won’t stop texting me

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

a little over a year ago i received this dm. every day since, ive lived in fear

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

i love these tweets where people are shocked that celebrities worth $20m are able to take good care of their skin

kelly

@filmsjroberts

4 years

kristen bell kristen bell at the beginning at the end of of the decade the decade

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

wow texting my number neighbor really took a turn

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

3 years

omg my girlfriend just WRECKED me 😅😅

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

me, stepping spider on into the shower the ceiling trying not to watching me do anything to anger the spider

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

LADIES imagine this, its 15 years from now. your son is up to bat. your daughter is cheering him on in the stands. your husband is nowhere to be found, you start to worry he’ll miss the game. suddenly, a tiny red convertible pulls up on the field. its your husband, Stuart Little

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

3 years

im pretty sure he is not aware of anything at all

Page Six

@PageSix

3 years

Prince Philip reportedly 'not aware of full extent' of the Harry and Meghan interview

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

fellas take notes this is how you properly slide into dms

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

card got declined at chuck e cheese and they kept my kid. sorry kevin the rat is your father now

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

after the yodel kid followed me i dmed him to try and get him to come out as whethans guest at coachella. and it happened. ur welcome everyone. i love u mason and i love the internet

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

why is literally no one talking about this???

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

this dude was vibing so hard back in the day

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

8 years

life comes at you fast

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

ill never forget this random kid who dmed me a selfie, then took a really dark turn

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

me sober in an uber: me drunk in an uber: ya but you see, their parents never catch them. the sister is always trying to tell on them. but they never get caught. it’s insane. and theres a fucking platypus. yeah its called phineas and ferb dude you seriously have to check it out

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

ladies you have $15 to spend on the perfect man $300 - works out $200 - smart $400 - smells nice $70 - has a job $10 - is a mouse named stuart $5 - owns a red convertible $500 - over 6 feet tall

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

going into quarantine. not showing any symptoms i really just need time to focus on myself

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

flight attendant: he’s having a heart attack is anyone here a doctor me: no but im an empath. i feel soooo bad for him :(

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

this is how people would text during the renaissance era

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

fuck being sad its 2017 we positive as hell from now on. call up your boy and tucc him into bed. kiss a bird. ride a horse bitch. we happy.

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

no questions at this time. he’s literally just vibing

Rex Chapman🏇🏼

@RexChapman

4 years

I have a few questions...

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

met this girl online and we've been talking for a few weeks... what yall think? 😏😏

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

frat guy: "lol why do girls all dress up as slutty maids or cats every halloween" shut the fuck up Bradley you've put on a basketball jersey and headband for 8 years straight bitch now go drink 7 coors light and pass out in the alley behind sig ep

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

if u put a parental advisory warning on any picture of ruth bader ginsburg it immediately becomes a hard ass mixtape cover lmao

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

me: my grandpa died guy who takes cbd: he should try cbd oil. works so good for me i swear by it. u can vape it or even eat it like in edible form me: he’s dead

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

me: forever 21 T-shirt: ✨ 𝘿𝙊𝙉'𝙏 𝙏𝘼𝙇𝙆 𝙏𝙊 𝙈𝙀 𝙐𝙉𝙏𝙄𝙇 𝙄𝙑𝙀 𝙃𝘼𝘿 𝙈𝙔 𝘾𝙊𝙁𝙁𝙀𝙀, 𝙋𝙄𝙕𝙕𝘼, 𝙑𝙄𝘽𝙀𝙎, 𝙃𝙊𝙏 𝘾𝙃𝙀𝙀𝙏𝙊𝙎, 𝘼𝙉𝘿 𝘾𝙍𝘼𝘾𝙆 ✨

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

waiter: we only have tap water, is that okay? me: listen i wouldn’t even care if you shot me with a gun

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

go crazy AND go stupid? in this economy?

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

“can you explain this gap in ur resume” yeah i was just goin around bein a lil guy

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

for 3 years straight this guy has been dming me asking for pics of dogs and nothing else. sometimes the internet is actually good

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

black mirror writer: what about an episode where.... webMD... becomes human... other writer: that’s just a doctor writer: ah true. mate i am absolutely fucking high as shit

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

when my PE teacher asked why i won't run the mile in 7th grade

Variety

@Variety

2 years

Nicolas Cage: "I am a goth."

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

are you in the right headspace to receive a milkshake that could possibly bring the boys to the yard

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

me: college girl waking up on sunday with a hangover: (eyes turning black) lets get some fucking B̺̪͘R̷̦̩̲U̘͢͡Ṋ̳̘̘͇̹̻̥C̷̶̻̟̠̗̫H̶̡̱̪

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 months

today is gonna be awesome

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

damn. if only the 200,000+ who died had just tried not letting it dominate their lives

Donald J. Trump

@realDonaldTrump

4 years

I will be leaving the great Walter Reed Medical Center today at 6:30 P.M. Feeling really good! Don’t be afraid of Covid. Don’t let it dominate your life. We have developed, under the Trump Administration, some really great drugs & knowledge. I feel better than I did 20 years ago!

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

i wonder if 10 years from now “quarantine” will be a theme at frat parties

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

my mom asked me for a pic of ed sheeran and i tried to be funny and i edited it i didnt know she was gonna frame it a week later jfc

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

this is getting out of hand

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 months

if i say im busy this is what's going on

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

i checked my texts and ive been drunk texting one of my recent uber drivers

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

due to personal reasons, i am going to get hit by a car

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

if third base is sex then what base is it when u watch ratatouille together

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

please doctor... my son.... he’s fergalicious

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 months

this is exactly how it feels to hit the pen too hard and go nonverbal

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

it’s been almost 3 years now. very disappointed

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

airdropping this to everyone else waiting in the emergency room

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

chipotle employee: do u want beans me: listen man i dont even know if i want to be 𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦 chipotle employee: ok. im gonna just add the beans

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

(i get kidnapped and thrown in the back of a car but we drive past some horses) me, pointing: hrmphses

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

honestly I think i would destroy this kid 1v1

Kylie Jenner

@KylieJenner

5 years

reach for the stars baby 😩😩😍😂

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

yessss just got my euphoria high school schedule

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

sorry everyone. i tried. i really did

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

i ordered 30 of these last week and they just arrived today. now idk what to do with them

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

bowling alley screens when you get a strike:

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

its a nice day to start again its a nice day for a 𝐫𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐞𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

i always felt like older generations were more prone to being taken advantage of by false/satire content on the internet but recently I notice gen z being like “how is this real????” and it’s an onion article about a baby being launched out of a trebuchet

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

mentally i am here

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

alright... wtf going on in this picture

IGN

@IGN

5 years

Get a better look at the new toys joining the cast in the brand new Toy Story 4 trailer!

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

juul: charged skechers: on my wife: left me

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

just found out almonds improve your eyesight which is literally post nut clarity

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

whoever runs @ChinatownMarket socials, i just wanna talk

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

its summer 2017 😈😤that means.. dudes wearin rompers 😍😜 late night fidget spinning 😎😆 possible world war 😮😳 tucking ur homies into bed ☺️❤️

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

astrology app: you will be calm today :) me, 4 iced coffees deep at 11am: 𝐧𝐨 𝐢 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐨𝐭

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

coachella checklist for tonight: -pay 18 for one beer, pretend im drunk -have a girl sit on my shoulders until my legs give out because im weak -take one hit off a joint and then freak out and call my mom to pick me up -get kicked out for being ugly -flower crown

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

this was my favorite trump tweet

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

9 years

Do you ever get so drunk you just print out motivational words and hang them up on the wall. Apparently I did http://t.co/FIpYZFwH2t

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

bro i swear if you don’t have yourself a merry little christmas im gonna be so pissed

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

feeling great about this 👍

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

2 years

walking addicts will be like “im just gonna go for a little walk”

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

me walking into my parents room to tell them i shit my pants

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

facebook: Happy Halloween everyone ! 😀 twitter: happy halloween lol youtuber: Theres A Ghost In My House And He Tried To Eat My Ass ???? (Not Clickbait)

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

me: :( a duck at the park: ☀️ ☁️ ☁️ ☁️ ☁️ ǫᴜᴀᴀᴀᴄᴋ!! 🚴‍♂️🌳 🌳 🦆 🌳 ⛲️🌳 me: :)

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

me: i hope my brain will let me focus today. i really need to get some studying done! brain: brain: brain: brain: brain: ᶠᵒʳ ᵃ ᵍʳᵉᵃᵗ ᶫᵒʷ ʳᵃᵗᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᶜᵃᶰ ᵍᵉᵗ ᵒᶰᶫᶦᶰᵉ, ᵍᵒ ᵗᵒ ᵗʰᵉ ᵍᵉᶰᵉʳᵃᶫ ᵃᶰᵈ ˢᵃᵛᵉ ˢᵒᵐᵉ ᵗᶦᵐᵉ

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

{\__/} ( • . •) / >🍪 i can’t feel this edible 40 min later {̙\̞̪͖͙̼̠̗̳ͅ_͉̜͇̺͓̺̫͓̱_͇̻͎̼̞/̰̗͙̦̻͇̖̰} ̖̟̳̘̥̗̞͇(̖̺̣̙̩̙͍̺ ͖̦̠̟•̮͍ ̞̮̲.̯͕͓̬̺̙ ͍̩͙•̣̼̦̩̘̰͓ͅ)͍̤̤ ͚̠̩͎̳̱̺̠/̞̪̯̻̞̤ ͙͕͈̰ ̯̳̙̖̪͇̤>͍̞͈̱̙

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

millennials dont “date” anymore they just collab on a relationship

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

hate those restaurants with signs like “no wifi here - just talk to each other like the old days :)” fuck u dude im trying to watch porn in this quiznos

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 months

heyyy my boy over there thinks you're cute. but also he just hit the pen and went non-verbal so don't try to talk to him

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

3 years

ur in her dms, she’s actually a catfish account i created. ur in my dms. we are dating now. i love u so much

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

8 years

[stuart little stops next to me at the light in his fuckin sweet ass little red car] my gf, immediately: i think we should see other people

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

7 years

me: hey guy who runs fake bryson tiller account: if u dont bring positive energy, i wont vibe with u... simple as that.

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

reply to this with the weirdest image in your phone gallery ill start

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

4 years

fellas just know this, if she starts exhaling knives at you, she's the one

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

me: turn left here uber driver: the gps says right me: omg 🥰🥰 are we having our first fight

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

wife: if you dont stop talking like fred flinstone i swear to god i am leaving you me, fighting back tears: well sharon.... there’s the yabba-dabba-door

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

got his ass

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

lgbt stands for lets get beans tonight

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

do we not see how messed up this is?

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

just having fun

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

lil wayne: real g’s move in silence like lasagna garfield: yo this song fucking slaps

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

no dude YOU live in a society i live in the ikea cafeteria

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

this is our first thanksgiving since grandpa was diagnosed with relatable teen quote disease. he keeps saying shit like “if i don’t vibe with u, u will kno right away” and “late night convos with ur day ones over a blunt >>>” its annoying as shit but i still love him

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

6 years

if ur friend falls asleep a fun prank is to put his hand in a bucket of warm monster energy so he has dreams about riding dirtbikes and fighting his stepdad

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eric curtin

@dubstep4dads

5 years

sorry babe im a skater, the carrhart beanie stays ON during sex

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