If your kid is crying because they got an almond joy when all the other kids got Reese’s it’s because I hate their costume. Second-rate candy for a second-rate effort. Welcome to the real world bucko
There are 3 guarantees in life:
1. We all die one day
2. The sun rises in the morning
3. Tanner Morgan completes a slant to Rashad Bateman for 12 yds and a First Down
I’ll never forgive you all for upscaling breakfast. It used to be sacred. Now some eggs and a smoothie is $18.95 just because the floors are white and the walls are pink and the name of the place is something pretentious like Lily & the Waffle
Embrace the fact that Notre Dame will always be ranked high because of the money that comes with it. Accept that in exchange for this, we see them get their doors blown off on a big stage every now and then. Come to terms with this and get back to enjoying college football
1.Tanner Morgan is as poised as they come. The dude literally doesn’t have the ability to panic
2.Great players have to make great plays in the biggest moments. Winfield consistently does that
3.Not knowing if the O is going to run 100x or throw it 100x is a Ds worst nightmare
In addition to being student-athletes Mohamed Ibrahim and Tyler Johnson also serve as the Dean of Georgia Tech and the Mayor of Atlanta in their spare time. Two men giving back to the community. It’s wonderful to see.
The problem with being a whiskey drinker is you think everything else is light work. Now I'm over here gone off the Amaretto Sours too embarrassed to admit that I can't stand up
Meatloaf is a victim of poor branding. It’s delicious, easy to make, and deserves to be part of the regular weekly dinner rotation but it will always be associated with Great Depression meals
1.Running 8min off the clock and ending with a TD is something O’s dream of
2.Uniform combo was Top10 all time
3.Tanner Morgan looks comfortable. I selfishly love the INT because these WRs have earned a “screw it, let’s see what happens” pass now and then
#GopherGangGangGang
“...And how many is the reservation for?”
“Six”
“And under what name?”
“Brock”
“Brooke?”
“No. Brock. B as in boy -Rock”
“Barack?”
“Just put it under Alex man, damn”
If you Venmo me $15 I will pick you up from your hometown bar tonight in a black SUV and casually mention for everyone to hear that the private jet is fueled and ready to take off
DMs are open to any dudes who wanna shoot their shot w/ an old flame from HS at the hometown bar this Wednesday. Let's workshop some lines so you're ready for gameday!!
1. A banged up OL flat out bullied a DL w/ 2 top draft picks
2. No better way for the Tyler Johnson era to end than that performance. And the Bateman era has already begun
3. Auburn faced some great RBs this year. But Mohamed Ibrahim was clearly the most physical
Outside of some 2Q lapses, that’s about as dominant a win a Minnesota team has ever had. Ya know what, even with the 2Q lapses, that may be the most dominant win
If you walk in the room and immediately ask "who's playing?" or "what's the score?" instead of JUST LOOKING at the tv I'm gonna lie about who's playing and I'm also gonna lie about the score
I’ve solved NFL overtime. College format. Offense starts at the 25. BUT! Both sides of the field are being used. That’s right folks, both O’s going into opposite end zones simultaneously. No downs, No timeouts, no morals. Whoever’s O gets in first wins.
-Incredible game from the DBs. Some penalties, some mistakes. But they were consistently challenged and responded
-Hats off to Rossi. Tonight and all season
-Dominant performance up front on O & D. No debating who the more physical team was
1. WR core is gonna continue to develop and be a PROBLEM for any D
2. If RBs can stay healthy theyre a top unit in the NCAA
3. DB unit has already shown progress from last season and can be great
Too close for comfort but this celebratory whiskey ain’t gonna know the difference
Taking a break from social media. I got some leftover ribs and they’re gonna need both of my hands and also my full attention. Thank you for your patience and understanding while I focus on myself and my well-being.
My completely biased unbiased opinion: A team that has proven they can fight for 4Q with freshmen and sophomores leading the way. What’s not to be excited about
#GopherGang
Some might call ordering lobster ravioli at a dive bar in Palm Springs past midnight a negligent decision but it's Friday and sometimes you gotta roll the dice baby!!!
Contrary to my initial belief, a funnel cake is only fun and/or delicious in a carnival atmosphere or in close proximity of a rollercoaster of some kind. Eating one just in the kitchen on a Monday is actually incredibly somber. I have completely misread the funnel cake situation.
Your favorite auntie washing up right now to prepare that dish that nobody gonna touch tomorrow. It's time to pull her aside and tell her the truth. It's in everybody's best interest