“Oh. Congratulations, that’s your second good idea.”
Izuku frowns as Katsuki leaves. /Talking/ is a fun idea for him?
.
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TBC
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“I’m serious! Look, you don’t even have to do it with my friends. Just yours, okay? Maybe join Mina’s lives.”
“Hell no! She’ll try to give me a makeup look and I don’t need her weird foundations giving me breakouts!”
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Izuku rolls his eyes again. “Kirishima, then? Workout videos are really popular.”
“No, because he matches me and I’m not letting the internet see me lose a sparring match.”
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“Denki has a tiktok dedicated to catching other heroes doing silly mundane things. Maybe you could agree to let him post some videos he has of you?”
Katsuki glares at Izuku.
“Okay, not that. Uh, Sero has a YouTube channel dedicated to dissing people’s favourite movies?”
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“Boring.”
“Guest star on Jiro’s radio show?”
“Her show runs while I’m training. I listen while I train. I don’t have time to appear on it.”
“Kacchan, you gotta work with me, here.”
“I don’t like your suggestions.”
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Izuku pauses to think for a moment. “Iida —”
“No.”
“You like cooking! Sato does Instagram lives every two weeks to share baking recipes! You could join him for a few of those?”
Katsuki frowns. “I’ll think about it. Who else is there?”
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“Uh, Yaomomo and Shoto host charity galas a lot.”
“My mother will get a kick out of putting me in a suit. No, thanks.”
“Hmm, Ojiro —”
“No.”
“Tsuyu —”
“No.”
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“Hagakure runs a scare account on Tiktok that’s just her spooking other heroes when they’re off duty.”
Katsuki grins. “That’s your first good idea. What are you doing?”
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“Oh, a bunch. I’m gonna do some crack interviews with Jiro where the questions come from her listeners. I’m also gonna let Ojiro’s kids from the dojo try to kick me. I’m sure that one will be fun.
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Sero said I could join him to try to convince him that some shitty movies are good even if I have to lie and make up things about the movie. He says it’s fun.”
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Katsuki sighs, a long, loud, drawn-out sound. “Fine. I’ll pick something.”
“Oh, Uraraka does random lives. She just talks to people or tries out food or candy that her followers suggest. You could join hers.”
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“Hi, everyone!” Ochako greets her platform. “How are we all doing today?”
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She skims through the comments, replying to a few with smiles and infectious giggles. She glances up and behind her phone at the sound of a clatter and a curse that has her chat shouting about whether she’s with Dynamight or not.
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“You were supposed to wait until I announced your presence before you started swearing!”
“Fuck off, Cheeks,” Katsuki hisses. “I just dropped your stupid big-ass pot on my foot!”
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Ochako winces and turns back to her phone. She sighs. “Surprise ruined, I guess. Yeah, that’s Dynamight. Say hi to everyone, Katsuki!”
She gives him a thumbs up when the camera is flipped to face him. He gives the camera a middle finger.
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“Be nice!” she scolds.
Katsuki holds up both middle fingers. Ochako sighs and flips the camera around again.
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“I was supposed to tease all of you but /someone/,” she pauses to give Katsuki a pointed glare, “ruined my surprise. Anyway, Chargebolt bet me a thousand yen that I can’t take Dynamight’s heat
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so my favourite hero is on the live today to cook one of his worst dishes so I can make a quick buck off Chargebolt.”
“Fuck off, Cheeks. Everyone knows Deku is your favourite hero.”
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Ochako sighs and smiles. “It’s because he’s the prettiest.”
“Say that again to my face, asshole.”
“What? I’m right!”
“Didn’t you vote for the Halfie bastard like, five times during that pageant in Third Year? He wasn’t even a competitor.”
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“His hair was long!” Ochako cries defensively. “Pretty boys with long hair are /gorgeous/! He dropped to second prettiest when he cut his hair again.”
She checks the chat and grins. “See? Ten thousand people are agreeing with me!”
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“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Taste this.”
Ochako blinks as a spoon is shoved in her mouth. She wrinkles her nose as she pulls the spoon away and holds it out. “Needs more salt.”
Katsuki takes the spoon back. “Fuck you.”
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“You asked!” She gives her viewers a smile. “Anyway, while Japan’s Biggest Asshole is cooking, let’s talk.”
“I think you mean Japan’s /Favourite/ Asshole.”
Ochako rolls her eyes at Katsuki. “Come back when you have the same popularity ratings that Monoma did last year.”
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She grins as Katsuki curses under his breath and bangs cabinet doors shut.
“Ooh, I think I struck a nerve, there.”
“That was a fluke and you know it!”
Ochako waves him off dismissively. “Shush, you’re interrupting my Q and A time.”
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Ochako laughs and flips the camera. “Hey, Japan’s Biggest Asshole? Smile for the camera!”
Katsuki flips the camera off again.
“Did you get it?” Ochako asks, cheering when she receives several yeses. “Okay, let’s see. . .”
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“What are you cooking?” Ochako asks.
“Wouldn’t you like to know, floaty girl,” Katsuki sneers.
Ochako gasps. “Was that a meme reference! Dynamight, you’re chronically online!”
“Takes one to know one!”
Ochako sticks her tongue out at him.
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“I know,” Ochako says. “He’s usually against stuff like this because he doesn’t like people seeing him in his natural moron state, but he agreed today! So, yay!”
“Why are you talking about me?”
“You’re my guest star, Dyna-moron. You’re the hot topic for today’s live.”
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Ochako squints at her phone. “Deku, is that you?
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“Katsuki, say hi to Deku!”
Katsuki looks at the phone and the thumbs up Ochako gives him. “Fuck off.”
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“Oi, what are the shippers doing on my food live? Come back when I’m discussing Dekuravity theories!”
“You’re still doing those?”
“They’re fun!”
“That’s insulting. Taste this.”
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“Why, jealous?” Ochako takes the spoon before he can shove it into her mouth. “Spicy. But still very handle-able.”
“Handle-able is not a word, Cheeks.”
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Ochako giggles. “I’m not confessing /shit/.”
“Oi, that’s my word.”
“Oi, you don’t own words.”
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“I’m not answering shipping theories on a food live! Wait your turn!”
“Oi, fuckers!” Katsuki shouts. “Stop askin’ about me!”
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“Ask away! I even have the Deku Expert with me to help!” Ochako says and watches the chat explode with cheers. “Okay, slow down! I can’t see any of your questions.”
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“He does! I think he has at least one of each of us, plus about fifty of Dynamight.”
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“Talking about the plush collection?” Katsuki asks. “Yeah, I tried to crash at his place once and couldn’t sleep because the number of posters with my own face competed with All Might and they were /all/ staring at me. Never again.”
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“Aw, next time crash at Kirishima’s. It’s close to your favourite bar anyway.”
“Yeah, right. He’ll just try to pester me about what I’m doing in my free time.”
(TBC)
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“Sorry! Please don’t burn my plushie!”
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“Oh, he invites Dynamight for those.”
“Are you talking about Deku’s stupid lives?”
Ochako nods at Katsuki. “Mm, they wanna know if you guys are roommates or if you just happen to always be there whenever he goes live.”
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“Oh, he only goes live when I’m around because I boost his popularity.”
“Deku, stop putting middle fingers in my chat!”
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