Seth Payne @SethCPayne Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@slayteliaera

@AliceAbok

@iSellEBT

@Coachmamad

@CheikouA

@TheElipsoid

@jkmentality

@EZywiol

@LairdHansFelter

@Rayzorac

@yourfitnic

@KCCA

@IballsInah

@anythingmimi

@BiondoNik

@BERRIEDALIVE

@McCainJack

@MSFTDeepSpeed

@tousennoir

@Iambrittjohnson

@Marcus_cel

@PublicHappie

@MikeHarrisGolf

@Prof_Farzad_WLV

@aleEri_BAE

@lostintrovert_

@LadyPurpleHoops

@ControlRemedy

@Ruaka_STARDOM

@OlamilekanChad

@bonellie_emma

@PineFootball

@Boziste

@HarpendenRUFC

@imevylin

@ASMR_GioGio

Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

1 year

@AllistairMcCaw @MattAshley2012 The kid in blue did such a great job of making kid in red really work for it while at the same time coaxing him to hit the half nelson.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Fire Bill O’Brien. Today.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

7 years

This guy's all right.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Crazy that Dodgers fans spent all year wishing for Astros batters to get hit, and now Astros batters keep hitting those Dodgers fans in the outfield.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

Omg Kate and Mack put that city’s nuts in a vice.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

Cuckolding the Yankees with the “we want Houston” chant is the greatest sporting feat this century.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

The Texans just beat the Kansas City Chiefs. The Texans were missing their two starting cornerbacks. Deshaun Watson just swapped spots with Pat Mahomes in the MVP discussion.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

We’ve been telling y’all for 20 years—Andre is a quiet man, but when Andre speaks...

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Out at Skeeters game and ran into local hero @TankSchottle . He can’t bat boy this year so they’ve got him working in the club until AAA relaxes the on-field restrictions.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Oh man, I’m 8 minutes into Scott’s Tots and I’m not sure I can finish this.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

David Culley just said he's unaware of Deshaun Watson wanting to leave the Texans, so that's how my day is going.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

@RapSheet “So, Kyler, did you watch the game film we loaded on your iPad?” “For sure. I watched like 4.3 hours of it. Good stuff.” “See here’s the thing, Kyler—we didn’t load any game film. We loaded Season 3 of Stranger Things. Can you even tell me thing one about that douchebag Mike?”

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

David Quessenbury making his first career start at LT for the Titans today. He was first diagnosed with cancer in June of 2014. What a story of persistence.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

Texans current problem: Don’t have a GM Rockets current problem: Contract uncertainty with head coach Astros current problem: Can’t figure out if it’s pronounced Yor-dan or Jor-dan

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

The bat Maldonado used is being phased out because it breaks too often, not for any kind of performance issues. This is a non-story.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 months

Mike Evans stays real

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Important distinction I think some people are missing: Deshaun Watson has not asked for a trade—he has asked that changes be made for the better. Unlike many player/management disputes, Deshaun’s interests are directly aligned with the fans.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Thank you, Andre. People need to understand that this is not some media creation. Jack Easterby is a divisive force. He is the opposite of what he fools people into believing he is.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 years

Update from underneath my bed.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Siri has that look of the kid who consistently charmed his way out of detention.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

They pitched three starters today and would have been fine tomorrow WTF 😂

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

1 year

2020: The Astros are evil because they used electronics, you see. 2023: Of course we used electronics! Everybody did! But the Astros are evil because they used crude percussion instruments.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Keke Coutee spent 2 1/2 years in Bill O'Brien's doghouse on a false conviction.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

@DunkTopic Lebron in 3, maybe 4, separate body bags.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

Bill O’Brien the GM needs to convince Clowney the agent to allow his client, Clowney the player, to meet with Bill O’Brien the football coach in person and settle this shit.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

JJ’s sack in the third quarter and the effect it had on the team and the crowd was unlike anything I’ve ever been a part of as a fan or player. It was backyard imagination stuff come to life.

JJ Watt

@JJWatt

4 years

I want to say this to our fans... The energy, noise, intensity & electricity you brought yesterday was incredible. Thank you for that.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Uh, somebody check my numbers on this. Tepera before sticky stuff ban 1.82 ERA Tepera after sticky stuff ban 4.05 ERA

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

This is awesome 😂

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 months

I'm not familiar with this technique

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Bro they gave Randall Cobb $18 million guaranteed

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

Gerrit Cole tweets whatever he pleases about Hong Kong.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

In every important life situation from here on out, I’m simply going to pretend I’m the 2021 playoff Astros with 2 outs.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

Felt like a walk off tbh…

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 months

Strip sack by 35 year old Houston native Jerry Hughes, who was the one active player known to be pissed about the Luv Ya Blue jerseys in Nashville 😂

Houston Texans

@HoustonTexans

4 months

SCOOP & SCORE FOR SHELDON RANKINS ‼️

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Here’s the scary thing about the Hopkins trade: O’Brien isn’t going to get fair offers in any trade because there are 31 actual GMs in the NFL who know that he will take a bad deal. He’s established himself as a mark.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Can’t wait until we get this vaccine so Bill O’Brien can trade it for 3 used heroin needles.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

A football team without at least one of these guys--Andre Johnson, JJ Watt, Deandre Hopkins, or Deshaun Watson--Ladies and Gentlemen, I present you the 2002 Houston Texans.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

He rode a bus 800 miles so he could play a game with a partially collapsed lung. But you’re harder than him I guess?

Patrick Bet-David

@patrickbetdavid

5 years

He’s on track to be the Dwight Howard of the NFL. You’re celebrating, 3 days after losing to the Colts as the starting quarterback? The pain of a loss in the playoffs can’t go away that quickly. There’s something wrong with this picture.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

7 years

This has been a hell of a lot of fun, but I’m especially happy for all of you who grew up with the Astros. Soak it in.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

They tried to use the BOB offer code but that shit expired.

Aaron Wilson

@AaronWilson_NFL

4 years

Packers also wanted Texans to pay a portion of Will Fuller's salary in proposed trade, per league sources. That, and disconnect on draft pick compensation, plus COVID-19 situation, all led to no deal

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 years

My guess is that AJ is a pilot on a sightseeing helicopter ride, and Keuchel is pointing out the Statue of Liberty to Lance.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Prom photo TD celebration progressive AF 😂

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 months

Derek Barnett has been a fucking stud ever since he got to Houston

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

At the courthouse to watch fresh attorney @MikeMeltser get sworn in.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Two people from Boston have reached out to me in the last 10 minutes telling me how smart and competent Caserio is. Let me be clear on one thing: I DON’T CARE. I declare an embargo on any Patriots products. The Texans have an unhealthy fixation and they must be cleansed.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

I can't remember my head coach on any level of football, high school through NFL, skipping the plane/bus ride home. Am I alone in that?

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

1 month

The model: Get a top coaching candidate to be interested in your previously dysfunctional team by drafting him 17 years earlier, then accidentally win your way down out of the #1 overall pick just to have the #1 overall team decide to pass on the best qb by trading the pick to…

Adam Rank

@adamrank

1 month

NFL teams are going to model their franchise after what the Texans did for years.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

This photo smells like coffee and cigarettes at a Denny’s on your first weekend visit with your dad after the divorce.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

One of the best parts of the #Texans game was how many offensive players went full bull moose.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

But, but, but....

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

11 months

@HoustonTexans Oh hell yes

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 months

Reminder that the Texans did in fact hire an offensive minded head coach

BigE 🍉

@BigE_Houston

4 months

Here’s DeMeco Ryans telling Christian Harris step by step how to pick off Joe Flacco for the Texans 2nd pick six. That’s my Coach of the Year!! 😤

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Just sitting here shaking. This is out of control. Bill O’Brien has yet to have a good offense in 6 years, and he just traded away one of his two best players for David Johnson.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Feeling a lot of things right now, but mostly I feel like a sucker for believing there’d be a search.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Deshaun Watson on a bad team with no first round draft picks for years on end. The Dolphins are trying to become the 2020 Houston Texans.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Lotta people on here claiming that's the dumbest rule in football have never tried to buy a beer in the 4th quarter.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 months

Texans being credited for brilliant clock management...What is this foreign feeling that I'm feeling?

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

Luhnow you magnificent bastard.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 days

U of H is ignoring the NFL’s cease and desist letter. This is inspirationally badasss.

Joseph Duarte

@Joseph_Duarte

6 days

University of Houston plans to buck NFL, add alternate blue uniform, AD Chris Pezman tells @HoustonChron via @houstonchron

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

I wish McCullers were healthy to face Soto. You just know he’d be shuffling all over the mound.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

You will never defeat our buzzers, you stupid shits. We own NASA.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 months

Flacco's gonna come out guns a blazing. This game will end either 34-31 or 98-14.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 months

Burrow is like a young CJ Stroud. He'll get there.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Tepera likely in the clubhouse penning a letter to The Athletic.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

You guys think this is crazy? Wait until Easterby finds out some of these unmarried guys aren’t virgins.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

I’ve been working on anger management for two fucking years and I’m gonna let this stupid shit break me I guess........please excuse my language. Woosahhhhhh.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

Rewatching 7th inning and this moment got me for some reason. We get caught up in the tension and the trash talk of the playoffs, and that’s fun, but baseball is just a hell of a sport.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

Looks like he’s outside to me.

Cleveland Browns

@Browns

2 years

QB☝️ in the building

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Buck and Smoltz slowly realizing in the 7th inning of Game 5 that the Astros have a deep lineup.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

You know, Deshaun IS in a position where he could just start saying “screw it” and shrug off the play call. GO ROGUE, DESHAUN!

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

Nobody is blaming David Culley for the current state of the Texans, but there was extreme skepticism over his ability to be a head coach moving forward. You guys outside Houston haven’t lived through 18 weeks of this:

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Kobe Bryant once demanded a trade and the situation seemed unsalvageable. The remedy for the #Texans is simple: Sign Pau Gasol.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

I commend the A’s broadcast for taking a stand against flopping.

A's on NBCS

@NBCSAthletics

3 years

"There's no reason for that play. I have a problem with it." Stew said there probably would have been a brawl back in his day after the Correa-Chapman play

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 years

For people outside the city who don’t understand the situation, I’m not one to look for stuff like this. Dude has been lying about us for months while failing on radio. Sent his producer to record us while we were on air and I had enough. Ask around about his reputation.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

1 year

I feel very strongly that the Texans should do whatever it takes to make DeMeco Ryans their coach. I lay it all out here. Please give me your counterarguments so I can firmly, but politely, jackknife powerbomb them in a follow up video.

DeMeco Ryans Absolutely Must be the Texans Head Coach

DeMeco Ryans interviewed with the Texans on Friday for their open head position. Ryans elevated from 49ers linebackers coach to defensive coordinator last se...

www.youtube.com

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 years

@MarkArum “All in all a great evening with my love. We went home and made love on a bed made of sandpaper, but not before I listed all her faults from the previous week.”

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Texans claiming that they shopped Hopkins’ and took the best deal is like when I tell my wife that I looked all over the place for the best deal on anything.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

Shit, I missed it, did Chapman pitch another hanging buzzer?

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

I don't want Antonio Brown on the Texans. I desperately need him on the Roughnecks.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Mark Ingram has played for some great teams and he probably won’t be remembered for this season with the Texans, but damn it if he isn’t creating the entire run game with blood and want to. I love this fucker.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

The Mariners should take solace in knowing that the Astros could never do this to them if they were a bad baseball team.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

What the hell. What the hell is this?

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

D’onte Foreman just dragged Bill O’Brien‘s doghouse 50 yards.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

7 years

Shad Khan willing to swap dates with Texans, even though it would cause Jags to have 3 straight road games. Ahem.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

I love how every Texans higher-up says “Jack Easterby does a lot of things really well”, when we’ve seen zero evidence of him doing ANYTHING well, other than advancing his own interests.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

We are two head coaches, one GM, and a re-signed Verlander away from a golden age of sports in Houston.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

5 years

The song “Baby It’s Cold Outside” was written in 1944 by Frank Loesser to sing with his wife at parties. The song has been increasingly scrutinized for its lyrics, sometimes banned. Times have changed, and we must never return to the days of people singing duets at parties.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

When your bandana feels like a crown of thorns.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Sure, great play, but without Hopkins on the roster we’ve been able to clear the way for Deshaun to spread the ball around to a bunch of guys who can’t score.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

1 year

This feels so right.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 months

470 yards. 5 TDs. And he was KIND OF OFF HIS A GAME. Stroud is something different.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

3 years

Yankees fans waited two years to boo and now they're tuckered out in the third inning?

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 months

55 yards in the air with this in his face

NFL

@NFL

6 months

CJ STROUD. ABSOLUTE DIME. 📺: #AZvsHOU on CBS 📱: Stream on #NFLPlus

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

7 years

"This city, man, they deserve this." Lance McCullers

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 years

The baseball gods could have released the Twins from their 16 year playoff losing streak, BUT THEY FAVORED THE ASTROS INSTEAD. Thank you, righteous baseball gods.

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

4 months

Battle red MHGA hats?

NFL Films

@NFLFilms

4 months

"Go make Houston great." @JJWatt to DeMeco Ryans last year 💪 @HoustonTexans

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 months

OMG

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

2 years

Pep Hamilton coached Justin Herbert his rookie year. This year he coaches Davis Mills, who outperformed Herbert today. The Texans may need to offer Pep something to keep him around next year…suggestions?

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

6 years

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Seth Payne

@SethCPayne

7 months

CJ Stroud just threw his first interception, which resulted in a first down for the offense. I will let somebody else explain.

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