Bethan J @MsBethanJ Twitter profile

Pinned Tweet

Bethan J

3 years

So that’s it. As of this week I’m no longer a neurosurgery trainee. I’ve given up my NTN after 6 years in neurosurgery. My stomach still flips when I think about what I’ve done. I still can’t quite believe I’ve done it. I’m not sure if it’s brave or stupid? 1/n

1K

894

12K

Last Seen Profiles

@mahamer727

@samtyh8

@spiritofshankly

@Regnjun

@VistaMagenta

@AlpesIsereTour

@jackbenedwards

@katiagallegos_

@tractor_owner

@joliecore

@runtabino

@stinkyhuggies

@MartinFayulu

@t4tenrec

@szczesniak__a

@Korrupt_Kitten

@kateleth

@rednosebulldozn

@RocCalli

@officerfrenly

@tobeofficial_en

@MegPepperonis

@howstar123

@MegPepperonis

@SolusFinance

@2021Prospects

@tk_had

@polinakeoning

@sonridesigual

@topstarnews

@HayEscuelaEdeLP

@osier_forest

@sparegleden

@zjoshuaa

@Kpo_do

@RaysBaseball

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

The cheek of Jeremy Vine referring to the upcoming “AMBULANCE DRIVER” strike on @BBCRadio2 “Ambulance drivers”?!? Why on Earth would you term them that? They are PARAMEDICS; very highly-trained individuals who literally have the skills to save lives. Please respect them as such

267

2K

8K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

The law being introduced to enforce “minimum service levels” for strikes… I work as a doctor in the NHS. We literally fantasise about minimum service/staffing levels just being met on a NORMAL day??! So tell me… how is this supposed to work?!

66

2K

6K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

I’m also not sure why I’ve wrote this. I’m guessing I can’t be the only one who may be having a crisis of career/training... I don’t know because we don’t talk about it. But I DO know that it’s terrifying, and if it’s the right thing for you, then you may owe it to yourself 10/10

513

89

5K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

As the pandemic and then 1st lockdown started I should’ve been starting my PhD - I was so excited. But of course, that was then not to be. NHSE requested us to return to clinical practice for obvious reasons and so I did. Gladly. I couldn’t sit by and watch this…

117

1K

4K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

A senior said to me on announcing this “not everyone is cut out for neurosurgery”. No. Just no. I’m sure some will make me out as incompetent and hence why I’m leaving, but no. It’s not that I CAN’T do it... I’m now CHOOSING NOT to do it. Recognise that there’s a difference. 7/n

51

76

3K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

Genuine question, but do you ever feel like you just don't fit in? Not just work-wise, but socially too? I.e. basically anywhere? I think this is something that I've always felt, but have been thinking about it a bit more of late... mainly trying to understand why I think. 1/

294

110

3K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

Eventually I hope to get back into a training programme (currently debating between GP and psychiatry), a training programme that allows me to be me, and nurtures that. Not one where being told “you are not arrogant enough” is a major criticism. 9/n

152

46

3K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

Tomorrow, junior doctors will strike. A full 72 hr walkout It isn’t the first time I have striked as a dr; I didn’t think there would be a second time post-2016, but here we are. I’m so glad and so proud ✊🏻 The decision wasn’t easy. However, it is the RIGHT one. Let us unite.

35

574

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

And please be angry when this country inevitably continues to vote Tory at the next general election. Because the shit that we’ve seen & experienced the last two years makes me think think that this is actually possible. Nothing surprises me anymore. Suck on that @BorisJohnson

79

251

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

Re: what’s next, I have a new job to tie me over - something just to pay the mortgage for now. But I’m going to take some time off the training conveyor belt. I’m trying to avoid that “you’re a failure” internal monologue, and am recognising that I’m actually burnt out. 8/n

30

20

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

I just sent this message to my current hospital’s strike WhatsApp group… a hospital which I joined a month ago and where I still don’t know a lot of my colleagues… Can you spot my embarrassing typo? Gonna have to strike in disguise now… 😳💀😱

190

60

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

#ThisIsGoingToHurt has left me distraught. I couldn’t care for Adam Kay’s character; I kinda get what they were trying to do (& they did it well). What got me, was the accurate depiction of the system, but most of all, poor Shruti. I felt like I was watching myself at times 1/

79

136

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Please be angry at THEIR parties and THEIR drinks. Please be angry at their ability to keep their mates in millions of pounds of contracts with dodgy PPE. Please be angry that these charlatans are still in power and that they couldn’t give a damn about any of you/your families.

2

285

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I’ve got to be honest… Working in Toys R Us as a medical student, being screamed at by parents for “ruining Christmas”, taught me more about dealing with difficult consultations than any med school communication skills session ever did.

49

53

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

My Dad has been telling all his friends recently that I’m training to be a doctor now. Me: Dad, I’ve been qualified as a doctor for 9 years. It’s just that I’ve switched from neurosurgery to GP training… Dad: that’s what I mean. You’re training to be a PROPER doctor now! 🥰

60

29

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

I personally found training/the environment rather toxic. This is not to put anyone off - it’s about honesty. This was my experience. I’m ashamed to admit that I let some of the things that were said to me, be said. Ultimately I felt like I didn’t have a choice, but no more. 4/n

14

40

2K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

A big part of therapy has been that of culturing some self-compassion. I’ve been vocal about how hard I find this, but I can now see that this decision in a way, is self-compassionate i.e. I’m unhappy, so let’s try and ameliorate that. I’m trying to recognise self/worth. 6/n

9

28

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

My mental health has taken a real knock the past couple of years, and there is this part of me that is overwhelmed with depression and anxiety that I just don’t recognise as me. Whilst work/training was in no way the whole cause of that, it certainly did contribute in a way. 5/n

8

22

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

So it’s almost 6 months later & those 6 months have been some of the toughest. I felt lost. I felt stuck. I felt broken. But now some good news… I’M GOING TO START GP TRAINING! It would be an honour to join #TeamGP one day, and I hope I do the training proud ❤️

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

So that’s it. As of this week I’m no longer a neurosurgery trainee. I’ve given up my NTN after 6 years in neurosurgery. My stomach still flips when I think about what I’ve done. I still can’t quite believe I’ve done it. I’m not sure if it’s brave or stupid? 1/n

1K

894

12K

176

31

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

Remembering the time a Tinder match looked familiar… I assumed he was a friend of a friend or something Opening conversation: Him: do you work at [3ry neuro hospital]? Me: Yes! Do you work here too? Him: No! You did my last shunt revision! Did you touch my brain?! *unmatch*

49

27

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Please be angry that they’re not being held to account. Please be angry at the state of healthcare in this country now & how the current govt is revelling in this demise as it will line their pockets further. Please be angry at the lack of restrictions and appropriate testing.

1

177

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

I thought I would instantly feel better, like a weight had been lifted, but I really don’t (annoyingly). I also feel like my identity is in question now - neurosurgery training is all I have known for some time. 2/n

26

17

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Please be angry at the number of deaths/number of positive cases that are ongoing. Please be angry that loved ones died alone. Please be angry at the blatant lies our government are telling. Please be angry that your PM has been sanctioned yet has no intention of resigning.

3

161

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

And this idea wasn’t knee-jerk/reflexive. It has actually been floating around my mind for quite a while. I never felt like I fitted in (was sometimes told that too), and the more senior I became, the less I felt like I could break that mould and forge a path. 3/n

9

15

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

Many are not aware of the state of the NHS at the mo. It's not their fault; there's little in the media. If you know where to look/have witnessed this, then you'll know. But that's not enough. So; a 🧵 of tweets showcasing reality. Please share/RT to those who may not know.

27

760

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

8 months

I just think those hospital managers need to be accountable too. The ones who did the “brush under the carpet” thing that we’ve all witnessed & become accustomed to, working in the NHS. The ones who made healthcare professionals raising valid concerns, apologise to a murderer.

13

154

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Why are people getting so annoyed about the mass NHS booster text that’s been sent around today? It was clearly a mass text sent to anyone and everyone… if it captures someone unboosted - great! If it doesn’t apply to you, just ignore it. It was literally just one text!

35

41

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I’ve struggled to feel like I’m doing a good job in GP But today, a little 5 y.o. patient grabbed my head in both hands & planted a huge slobbery kiss on my nose as a way of his thanks 😂 Caught me completely unawares, but smile I did! It’s the little things isn’t it?!

37

19

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I really, really, REALLY hate how we attach so much guilt (from ourselves) to having a day where you do absolutely nothing. Especially on nice weather days. It ends up feeling that you’re just wasting time, life, everything. Nothing feels good about it because of that guilt.

59

46

1K

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

5 months

Today, a senior colleague (in a pastoral/supervisory role) subtly took me to one side and in the most normal & natural way possible, gently commented to me about my appearance/how I was presenting myself lately. It wasn’t made out to be a big deal and it was complimentary, 1/11

33

96

985

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

then immensely guilty for feeling like I did. My poor, poor friends and colleagues. They’ve gone through unimaginable situations. They are scarred. And many of them are sick in a whole host of different ways. So please don’t believe any of this shit being spouted by the Tories

2

98

931

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

I couldn’t have imagined the response to this - wow! There are many replies I want to make, and I will do so, but first and foremost I just want to say a huge THANK YOU for all the well wishes, support and kindness shown here. I’m not sure I deserve it, but it means the world ❤️

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

So that’s it. As of this week I’m no longer a neurosurgery trainee. I’ve given up my NTN after 6 years in neurosurgery. My stomach still flips when I think about what I’ve done. I still can’t quite believe I’ve done it. I’m not sure if it’s brave or stupid? 1/n

1K

894

12K

44

3

907

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Happy changeover/new rotation day to all the doctors starting new jobs today! Today is my very first day of GP training! After years of abandon, I’ve even remembered to pack my stethoscope! Scare-cited pretty much sums it up!

108

7

840

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

Signed off work. Restarted meds, trying a 5th antidepressant. Scared of not getting better. Wouldn’t wish this on anyone. Tied up in knots trying to understand it. But of course it doesn’t always make sense. For now this is my life. If this is yours too, I’m sending my love 1/2

89

14

739

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

Today is Monday. Today, #JuniorDoctorsStrike Remember: - pay down 26% vs ‘08 - it’s pay restoration not a “rise” - trapped in debt - we’re burned out, overworked & underpaid - 1000s of vacant medical posts; no workforce = no NHS - govt fails to hear us - we ALL must speak up

9

279

724

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

But even the guilt from that single time was insane. I was convinced I’d caused harm. There was certainly no drinks & certainly no party. I lived alone. All my family were a 5 hr drive away. They were all vulnerable and both my parents were immunosuppressed; so the isolation as

1

54

708

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

I felt the need to add my positive experiences in the sea of all the GP abuse that we find ourselves in currently, because: GPs ARE open. GPs ARE seeing patients. The media IS LYING to you. #TeamGP we’ve got your back. Thread 🧵 1/

6

88

685

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

It made me sad how surprised I was when colleagues at my new job were NICE to me... Actually greeting me. Holding pleasant 2-way conversation. Talking to me as if I’m an actual human/peer & not demoralising, infantilising or sniping at me. Respecting me for being me. 🤯

30

16

660

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I’ve just climbed into a hot bubble bath, with a bottle of lager and a custard tart… Self-care: am I doing it right?

66

1

652

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Pushed myself out of my comfort zone & wore this suit last night. I felt like a lemon all night (excuse the pun) though; so self conscious. I couldn’t relax & enjoy myself - I just wanted to get back home. A couple of years ago, I would have strutted out in this and owned it!

129

0

647

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

One of my best friends is still alive now because he took a taxi to the hospital. Only 40yo, he started getting symptoms of an MI on Saturday night. On hold to 999, then no ambulance available. Took Uber to A&E and had a cardiac arrest in waiting room within 10 mins of arriving.

Dr Hannah Barham-Brown

@DrHannahBB

1 year

I am so so terrified for this winter having seen the state of our emergency services today. Nearly an hour for an emergency ambulance. This will only get worse and people will die. The Govt have to get a grip and NOW.

12

40

256

18

104

615

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

My bank blocked my debit card after I tried to buy some fitness equipment this weekend. A suspicious transaction, apparently. Which is all you need to know about me, my waist line, and my exercise tolerance right now.

16

12

612

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

well as the constant panic that they would get sick and the 24 hour shifts left me somewhat… I don’t know how I would describe it. But I certainly felt like I “lost it” quite a few times. I ended up in some of the darkest places I couldn’t even imagine were possible…

1

37

606

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

And that was without working on Covid wards like some of my colleagues were. And it was without having to make those devastating calls to patient’s relatives. And it was without the devastation of losing family members of my own to this cruel illness. I felt “lucky” and thus

1

41

605

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

So I’ve decided to try & give up alcohol. My question is to those who’ve done something similar: what do you drink at pubs or when in bars? Are there any other options aside from the usual mainstream soft drinks or a lime and soda? I’m looking for inspiration when out & about!

686

18

604

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

There were lots of trigger warnings around and for a while, I wasn’t going to watch it. But I’m glad I did. It’s a story that needs to be told and a story that needs to be heard. The well-being of doctors and HCPs is in crisis. A stark reminder to look out for each other… 4/4

18

22

608

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

and joined me and I felt like the luckiest person alive. We were told that in no uncertain terms was more than one person allowed to be in the office at any one time, but that company, the chat and the chips that we shared was just a tonic. Something as simple as that.

1

42

592

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

murals and artwork on the wall. There was nowhere to debrief, no one to talk to - after all we were all being kept separate due to fear of Covid wiping out the entire paeds neurosurgery team. I remember having lunch alone as usual in the office one day. Another colleague came

1

48

571

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

TW: suicide Instead of telling people in crisis “you have capacity to end your life” or “if you really wanted to die then you would have done it by now”… …why can’t we just say “I’m so glad that you’ve asked for help” and follow that with “now let’s help you”?

11

101

563

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

LOVED getting mansplained to by a forensic psych, who decided that my explanation of C-spine anatomy to the training group was wrong. Me. Someone who studied/operated on the C-spine for 6 YEARS. He just wanted to explain to me how nerve roots work and where they come from...

44

16

569

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

stay at home. And thus they did. One of the many collateral devastations of Covid. We continued to do emergency operations day & night. Sometimes the children ended up on PICU whilst their parents sat and sobbed in the car park as they weren’t allowed onto the unit until a PCR

1

50

562

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I don’t know who needs to hear this but… When you tell someone that you’ve been given some adjustments by the Occupational Health dept at work for your own health in an attempt to stay well… It’s not appropriate to response with: “OMG, nice one, how’d you wangle that?!” 🙄

29

36

559

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I was redeployed to paediatric neurosurgery; the last clinical post I had just left as a registrar. We were a small team, and if any of us got covid, it had the potential to wipe the entirety of the team out - a team responsible for providing a tertiary service to a large part

3

44

543

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

result was returned. In the early days, this took up to 48 hrs. I couldn’t get my head around this rule & these poor families. At times we had to simply pretend it wasn’t happening. At times, we snuck them in. After a month or so, part of the PICU in the solely-for-children’s

1

40

534

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

After this, I’d go back to covering neurosurgery before returning at the end of the day to turn the patients back. Not many adults made it out of there. It was the weirdest juxtaposition seeing these adults lying there, dying, surrounded by the most colourful of

2

39

532

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

the shunt malfunctions, the catastrophic bleeds & the new brain tumours continued, to name but a few. It was heartbreaking as time went on and as we realised that some parents had delayed presenting to hospital/GPs after the general message to the public was to

1

42

533

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

Being brave and venturing out ❤️ #NewProfilePic

46

0

532

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

No. NO. How dare you?! You DO NOT speak for me Dr Malhotra. NONE of this current situation is the fault of the medical profession. None of it. This is the fault of the government & years of underfunding. We do our utmost to protect patients. Always have done. And always will.

29

59

523

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

of the North West of England and North Wales. I started working shifts 24 hours on/24 hours off. Some of those 24 hour shifts were ok. Many were not. We of course weren’t caring for adult Covid patients like many of our colleagues in the region were, but the traumas,

2

42

518

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

and turn them onto their front. It is of course no easy task, takes a big team, and so much care with the various tubes and infusions. And these patients were sick. Like sick sick. Obviously. And so many a time, a patient would arrest. On occasions more than one at the same time.

1

36

515

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

hospital closed - they had to start accepting adult Covid patients due to the numbers of cases in the region. Staff-wise, many were not “adult trained” and so lots of us got pulled from all over the hospital to help out. We had “proning shifts”. We would attend every adult

1

39

513

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I start GP training in 2 weeks and in a GP rotation. Problem is, I’ve never worked in GP before & to say I am bricking it is an understatement! I’d be so grateful to hear your tips or recommendations for any resources/books that may help with GP rotations/training! Thanks ❤️🙏🏻

210

39

515

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

@KevinCastley Wait… you’re for real aren’t you?! You actually believe this?! Bloody hell. To believe this, is truly despicable.

7

5

464

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

5 months

If you ask someone how they are and they reply “ok”, but you’re not really convinced… ask again. 11/11

21

26

502

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

First day of new job and I look rough AF because I was too nervous to sleep 😂 Eye bags for days. Please send caffeinated thoughts!

86

0

493

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Being coeliac is shelling out nearly £4 for the most pathetic loaf of imitation tiger bread. Weep. (Please don’t tell me to just go and make it myself - I just want to moan about how our bread is 4x the price, literally half the size and tastes like dry skin)

41

11

485

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I’m a doctor. I worked throughout the early waves in neurosurg/ITU & about to switch over to GP. Discovered I was double vaccinated in summer 2020. I volunteered for the AstraZeneca vaccine trial & had no qualms about doing so. I’ve since had booster in the NHS. #GetVaccinatedNow

24

46

481

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

According to today’s media: “NHS bosses are encouraging staff to free up hospital beds (in preparation for next week’s strikes)” OK. How far removed must they be to not realise that this is already what we are working ourselves to the bone to do, EVERY. SINGLE. DAY??!

18

87

470

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

So at 1am this morning, this little scamp rocked up on my doorstep, all the way from Romania. So I guess we live together now. Everyone, meet Noodle! #dogsoftwitter

36

9

446

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

My Christmas T-shirt/jumper this year, is one that showcases the real man of the hour! (Remember: stanning Chris Whitty is not just for Christmas. It should indeed be done all year round 🙌🏻)

21

6

447

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

9 months

For the first time, I’m taking the train to Birmingham which will take just over 90 minutes… …which is a slight difference to the 3 hrs usually spent on the M6! I just need to remember that although I still have my tunes, I can’t belt them loudly like I do in the car 😅

78

4

437

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

The anxiety that you experience on your drive into work for the day ahead, is such a special type of anxiety. Nausea and dread the whole way. Panic for what you’re going to be faced with. Almost wishing that the drive would never end! Anyone else?

73

13

431

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Starters over dessert. Amirite? I’m right.

93

4

434

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

The living alone in a pokey flat and the resultant isolation and depression. The lies to parents/loved ones about how “great” you’re doing. The pressure, the exams, the attitudes of senior colleagues (both good and bad). And ultimately… the darkness. It was so accurate 2/

2

15

431

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

What the F have I just read?! I hope to god I don’t work with people who go along with this. Utterly, utterly shameful. I am so, so sorry to all of those many patients who have been, and who continue to be, harmed by these tropes.

Trisha Price

@hummbugpie

2 years

Trigger warning- Will try keep this short. Uncovering the scale of medical gaslighting and corporate corruption. Who teaches our doctors to dismiss medically unexplained symptoms as hysteria? Lynn Turner- MUS management PowerPoint, Kings College London

56

158

492

82

69

427

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Not sure why I’ve decided to come to work dressed as Steve Jobs today.

48

2

428

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Please👏🏻stop👏🏻increasing👏🏻the👏🏻number👏🏻of👏🏻medical👏🏻students👏🏻when👏🏻there👏🏻is👏🏻zero👏🏻intention👏🏻from👏🏻HEE👏🏻to👏🏻increase👏🏻foundation👏🏻programme👏🏻or👏🏻specialty👏🏻training👏🏻posts👏🏻 That bottleneck is getting narrower y’all. And it will allow them to treat us worse than they do now.

John Alcolado

@Jcalcolado

2 years

Chester Medical School will take its first grad entry med students in Sept 22.However,due to lack of government funds & cap on places for UK students,we can only take international students.Meanwhile NHS desperately short of doctors & UK students can’t get place to study medicine

19

118

327

17

39

423

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

When you get called for any sort of official meeting/review in work, and you ask your boss/senior: “Do I need to be thinking about getting my union involved for representation?” And they answer: “That’s up to you.” That is 100% a HARD YES! Contact that union. Get the advice.

8

37

410

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

15 days

The birthday weekend has officially begun. Cheers, my dears ❤️

87

1

413

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 year

In clinic on a new rotation, I introduced myself to the consultant as “Bethan, one of the new GPST doctors”. He proceeded to ask me for a ‘shortened version’ of my name. For the rest of the clinic, he then introduced himself as “Mr X the consultant, & that’s Beth my helper”🤮

Gillian Lever ❄️

@gillybean712

1 year

The novice anaesthetist I was working with today introduced himself to the patient as Dr X and then introduced me to the patient as Gillian 😒 lovely.

59

11

467

35

23

398

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

5 months

Colleagues like this are worth their weight in gold. Never underestimate the power of your words and what checking-in with each other can really do. If you notice something different, I don’t think you’ll regret asking about it if it’s with genuine concern and compassion. 10/11

1

14

392

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

It boggles me how an environment that has been so inherently toxic, sexist, dismissive and verging on bullying, suddenly tries to become nurturing, supportive and friendly when you explain that you need to get out & you’re leaving. Too little. Too late. My thought for today.

29

11

384

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

8 months

The news has stirred up so much for me; I’ve not been able to stop thinking about it all day. It made me sad that people are still “surprised” that this could happen (although those in surgery are absolutely not) Thread of out-loud-thoughts, incoming 1/

Female surgeons sexually assaulted while operating

Trainees are being abused by senior male surgeons, a major analysis given to the BBC reveals.

www.bbc.co.uk

13

85

382

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

So it's been exactly a year since I left neurosurgery and this tweet below went a bit crazy. Boyyyyyyyy has that year been a ride. So apropos of nothing (and me just rambling into the Twitter void), I've been contemplating that last 12 months. Dangerous, I know. 🧵 1/

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

So that’s it. As of this week I’m no longer a neurosurgery trainee. I’ve given up my NTN after 6 years in neurosurgery. My stomach still flips when I think about what I’ve done. I still can’t quite believe I’ve done it. I’m not sure if it’s brave or stupid? 1/n

1K

894

12K

26

31

382

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

@AbbieTutt Mine was doing a smear on some ancient rubber pelvis, told not to use lube because of the rubber degrading. Inserted speculum, did ‘smear’ but then couldn’t get speculum back out. I yanked hard, and the vaginal canal came out of the model and was hanging outside like a penis 1/

5

3

378

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

5 months

I felt seen. I felt heard. I felt that somebody cared. I felt that someone had my back. I felt a little less alone. I felt relieved that I could acknowledge all of this. I felt a little bit lighter. I felt a little bit of hope. I felt connected. 9/11

2

11

373

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

And in that respect I felt immensely triggered. I have sobbed since I finished watching it. Every time i think about it, I burst into tears. I feel… that could have very nearly been me. Things have been that bad. It could be very nearly so many of us. How is that right?! 3/

8

371

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

On this #WorldMentalHealthDay I think I have to finally say this: I’m NOT actually sure that it IS ok to not be ok… I’m not saying it’s not ok to have a mental illness or to be struggling with our minds. Of course I’m not. But nothing about my depression feels “OK” to me.

15

19

364

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

1 month

When we say it’s a critical medicine, we’re not being sensationalist. #ADHD #NeurodiversityWeek

8

92

365

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Yesterday, I rang my GP, got a face-to-face appointment & seen the same day. I was expecting to be reassured & go about my day; alas I ended up with a 2-week-rule referral. My stomach is flipping, anxiety is of course in overdrive, but I am SO SO grateful for our NHS and GPs 🙏🏻

32

3

360

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

Feeling completely paralysed with crippling anxiety today for some reason. It’s unbearable. Have never posted anything like this before, but neither have I experienced it this bad before. I’m used to low mood/distress but not this. Any tips for grounding etc? TIA

127

2

349

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

Today I wore a 3M FFP3 mask whilst I stripped out attic insulation. Anyone else think they have a distinctive smell? Because as soon as I put it on, I breathed in & the smell took me somewhere. It took me back to proning adults in the children’s ITU & the same anxiety hit me.

29

11

350

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

7 months

This 40kg fluffball is having urgent diagnostic procedures tomorrow. It’s come out of nowhere. But I have a gut feeling that it’s gonna be bad news. If anyone is of the praying/sending positive thoughts into the universe persuasion, Noodle & I would be forever in your debt ❤️

76

2

345

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Hello my name is Bethan and apparently I can shoot white lasers from my eyes 😂

22

5

344

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

I’m just a girl, standing in front of a mixture of primary care services, desperately trying daily to get antibiotics for a raging UTI that I’ve had since Monday and getting worse 😭😭😭

36

8

340

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

On my way out after med on-call shift, picking up my bag from staff room Walk into a group of staff lamenting how busy the hospital is, exclaiming angrily “if only the GPs would finally open their doors & actually do some work & see patients” This rhetoric has gone too far 😢

26

16

339

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

This was my shopping list for on my way home from work yesterday evening. How obvious is it that I’m a single 30-something woman going home to get straight into her pyjamas on a Friday night?!

24

2

337

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

2 years

Stinks of bullying doesn’t it? Colleagues like this = demoralising. Sadly, there’s plenty of them around. None of us are more important than the other but at times there is such a thing as having to prioritise some things. Whatever we do, we cannot win with colleagues like this

20

28

333

Bethan J

@MsBethanJ

3 years

I took a break from decorating to sit in the garden and drink prosecco in the rain, I’ve received the most wonderful birthday cake ever from @DrNeenaJha & @DoctorMayJay , and I’ve had lots of lovely birthday wishes... I am so lucky and so, so grateful - what a lovely birthday ❤️

55

3

330