Ron Fister @MrFisterLLC Twitter profile

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Ron Fister

16 days

Moving on to more important things in my life,, starting today I will put down the bottle and commit my life to worshipping God and bettering my community ,, through quitting drinking forever I will now improve the lives of many

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Ron here

Courtney McKinney

@CourtAnne1225

1 month

I’m Courtney McKinney. I’m 40. I love college football. I live in Alabama and I genuinely do not give AF who any of you are voting for in November.

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@chilloutbagel I’m Ron

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

6 days

The correct beer for each setting Default: Miller Lite Out of Miller: Coors or Michelob Baseball park: Michelob Pool: Michelob cactus lime Lake: Leinenkugel or Kona big wave Airport: Blue moon Ski lift: Fireball shooter Wisconsin: Spotted cow With the old man: his beer of choice

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Scottie arrest and NCAA trailer ,, this has been an outstanding morning for white boys who are prone to overstimulation

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@CourtAnne1225 @3YearLetterman @chilloutbagel No this is Ron

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

I’m a handsome motherfucker I will not lie

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

My name is Ron Fister and you can’t make me stop Day drinking on a Saturday you just fucking can’t

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

5 days

@pabstblutrippin Do whatever you god damn please don’t ever ask me permission to drink a beverage ever again

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Not gonna get drunk tonight due to getting drunk yesterday but gonna get drunk tomorrow

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

6 days

DISCLAIMER: Miller Lite is still the correct beer for each of these settings besides Wisconsin (you gotta have a spotted cow when you’re in Wisconsin)

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

15 days

@JoeBiden I am

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@1ReesieMula 4. Cashier at the movie theatre who laughed at me after I embarrassingly responded “you too” when he told me to enjoy the movie

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

1. The beer in my hand

Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Everyone getting the beer rankings wrong

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

This life is a good life in the United fucking States of America ,, GOD BLESS

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Rons Friday plans in chronological order: 1) fitness center 2) experience existential dread at the site 3) take anger out on the bottle 4) make enemies

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

@ernietedeschi Depends if Rome had a football franchise that was always the butt end of a joke but recently turned into a force to be reckoned with

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Im pissing in places you never fathomed of urination

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Gonna have some tacos

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

I friggin love moms

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

Is 2 Xanax enough for a 2.5 hour flight?

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Thinking about some titties

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

6 days

Ron requires head

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

8 months

NOT the triple option I can tell you that much

Out of Context Human Race

@NoContextHumans

8 months

Without Googling, name something France invented👇🇫🇷

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Me and my coworker best friend have a solid professional relationship going,, we have a similar approach for solving difficult tasks and there is much opportunity for us to accomplish great things,, however that is now all out the window after I came on her 3 times this morning

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

My two purposes in life are to create world peace and get drunk and I’m all out of world peace

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

To celebrate my 3000th follower I will fly out 5 lucky fans Mr. Beast style (only one walks out the plane alive) to the destination of the Fuck A Fan Challenge where the winner will get to watch from the corner

Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

To celebrate my 500th follower Foodacris said he’ll do a Fuck A Fan Challenge ,, please DM him to opt in

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

The Amazon app should require a field sobriety test when you check out

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

I am beyond overjoyed to share to the feed that I, Ron Fister, have accepted a haircut appointment for this upcoming week

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

6 days

@Teddy_SigmaPhD Unfortuantly I tired myself out of Busch in my teenage years

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

This is a bittersweet feeling but I’m sorry to say to the feed I have officially quite drinking alcohol FOR GOOD,, my new wholesome hobby in place of the bottle is currently pending

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Resurfacing this just in case

Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

@_b0ls0n_ Thanks if you want to support Ron check out my Amazon wish list

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@11kmrn Chicken run

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

If you want to take this domestic from me you’re gonna have to pry it finger for finger off Ron’s cold dead body,, how you fucking feel about that white boy?

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Hair is a mess in this humidity so gonna put on a good drinking hat before the tavern ,, it’s a drinking hat because Ron’s gonna be drinking with the hat on and it’s good because it’s Ron’s

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Friggin pissed the fuck off,, might do some damage control where I control the situation with damage

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@b_powers69 Brock I’ll drink on your behalf in the meantime,, you just ordered a vodka soda at Buffalo Wild Wings nice Friggin order brock

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@bob69420710 Unrelated but I’m really craving the red fish tacos at hula hut right about now

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

3 months

THIS IS A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Just now came up with Rons Saturday plan: Be drunk the entire day

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

23 days

@3YearLetterman @AuburnMemes @Ashncoll Cant say I am but I do friggin love boats and broads and I especially love broads on boats

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Gotta tummy ache only some down right nasty head could cure

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

12 days

New intern next to me is a great addition to the team dynamic ,, when me and other coworkers talk ball he butts in with the stats he pulled up like the side person in podcasts

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

As a man after you drink one bottle of red on a weekday you’re faced with the difficult decision to just go to bed or consume whatever other beverage is in your fridge

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@AMAZlNGNATURE Gonna need to see a birth certificate

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

It’s been a really good run the last 50 years but Ron is sad to say I have officially retired from drinking. If you’ve ever gotten shit rocked hammered with Ron I would like to personally thank you for the memories we don’t remember but those days will now be over here on.

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Beer drinking hand accidentally opened another beer

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

8 months

#NewProfilePic I’m done advertising myself as an Aggie Twitter fan account ,, just a waste of breath #FireJimbo #RonHere

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

New white women arc type just dropped

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

7’1” bull

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@3YearLetterman @CourtAnne1225 Ron prefers being seated at the bar top (closest access to the bottle)

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

@SouthernandFat

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

My name is Ron Fister and I love having sex with hot women ,, that shit is gas no cap!🚫🧢🔥

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

14 days

Gonna eat supper then fire up my gaming console

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

9 months

I like what I see

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Air fryer couldn’t fit 4 taquitos as I originally prepared so gonna meal prep the 4th to heat up for a future date

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

But it wasn’t a Ron……IT WAS A LOBSTER ,, A RON LOBSTA

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

Just cracked open my first domestic on the day

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@icebergs1mpson Rons still here ,, gotta handle some business now tho

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@GritCEO69 No am Ron

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Should’ve known my horny ass couldn’t adequately handle corporate America

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

20 days

She’s a beauty ain’t she

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

My name is Ron Fister and you can’t make me stop Day drinking on a Saturday you just fucking can’t

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

To celebrate my 500th follower Foodacris said he’ll do a Fuck A Fan Challenge ,, please DM him to opt in

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Record low morning for Ron,, walked out the trailer with my gym bag and realized I forgot lunchbox so had to go back to get it then walked out realizing I put gym bag down in my trailer so went bag and was in my car when I realized I never put on a belt so had to go back

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Really enojoying my decision to rewatch trailer park boys again

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Football

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@reecexq Downstairs

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

9 months

She rogering my goodell til I commissioner

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Friggin pissed off,, white boy summer has officially kicked off and Ron doesn’t have his haircut

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Have more appliances than food so heated up hot dogs in hot dog toaster and gonna panini press bread and cheese on hot dog

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

You read that god damn right.

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Not sure if I can bring myself to have hot dogs for dinner for the 3rd night in a row

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Might have a sit down with HR after the way I just shamelessly mouth fucked a wings meal in 10 minutes flat carrots and all

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

15 days

Got my ps5

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

6:20AM. Woke up at wrong apartment complex. Zero recollection as to how I woke up on the sofa I woke up on. Currently Ubering to other buddy’s complex where I left my vehicle. Gonna drive straight to Waffle House before tears hit my eyes. Ron is fragile right now.

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

Tough day at the site

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

8 months

Rons Uber explained chronologically: 1) he picks me up in royal blue F-150 2) “you mind if I put on the radio to hear about the rangers?” 3) we discuss Ball 4) *beeping noise* 5) “sorry one sec” 6) *he blows into breathalyzer* 7) we further discuss Ball 8) dropped off 5/5 stars

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Had some ice cream

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@MarcelOzyna Tell your parents Ron said your “a good kid”

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Sobered up and lost my good drinking hat,, deeming this the worst second half day of Ron’s life

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

16 days

At a house with 3 empty bed rooms yet I woke up outside on a beer die table

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

Couldn’t decided between hot & sour, egg drop or miso soup so Ron got all of them

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

It’s a shame that foodacris is not honoring his mother on today of all days by not posting her on the feed

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@biggsnuggs The fame was funny for the first 12 hours but now I’m in Hell

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@3YearLetterman My state identification card suggests otherwise

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

@Lazzeshopper That’s god damn right

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

9 months

@car_freshenerr @v00d00binks @feralcarol_ Dinner with Jay Z

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Friggin stressed out on when I’m supposed to schedule a haircut

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

11 days

RON’S WEEKEND PLANS: be a loser virgin who will NOT go out and NOT have a DROP of alcohol and complete various tasks and chores and lift heavy weights ,, for the first time this calendar year Ron will be conducting a CHILL WEEKEND

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

2 months

@SouthernandFat Wasn’t any good games to wager

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

30 days

I will never apologize for party rocking.

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

6 days

Just thought of a great name for a tavern: “Beer World”

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

I just be buying carrots fr,, ain’t no plan with when I’m gonna eat em I just be throwin dem shits in my shopping cart!

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

10 days

Ron here

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

9 months

Memerald ordering for Ron at the deli because he can’t communicate in public at the moment

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Gonna clone myself so Employed Ron works 7 days a week in order to fund Unemployed Ron’s activities ,, however they both have to keep in mind they must train in preparation for Employed Ron’s retirement where they will then fight to the death over who keeps the 401k

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

Didn’t get my haircut this week Ron’s not a happy camper this week was defienitely the week to get a haircut

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Ron Fister

@MrFisterLLC

1 month

The most adult thing I do is put my wagering winnings into my savings account

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