I’m so grateful for
@kevinmd
and his amazing network of physicians and healthcare professionals who work tirelessly to tell important truths to the world.
Here’s my truth:
When I was a 3rd year medical student, we just couldn’t scrape together enough $ for our kids, rent, and med school costs. I applied everywhere for a job.
Everyone said I was overqualified. One female manager told me that & I said, “But my kids still need to eat.”
I broke 6 feet today to let a heartbroken nurse cry on my shoulder. It’s bad, guys. Really bad.
What will it take before we get it, as a country, and learn to put others before ourselves? 😭
Me: What kind of work do you do?
Patient: I work at a homeless youth shelter.
Me: That’s cool. Remind me to tell you something awesome when we’re done.
(Later.)
Me: You’re doing important work. And sometimes, those youth grow up and become docs.
Patient: 😭
Me: 😭
My dad took out a life insurance policy on me when I was a homeless teen so that he could “recoup his investments” if something happened to me.
Welp. Somebody doesn’t get any phone calls or annual presents from me. 🤷🏻♀️
She hired me. Best boss ever. And I will always treasure the time I spent working at a mall in NJ selling sparkly clothes to little kids. She kept telling me if med school didn’t work out, I could stay.
We’re still friends. ❤️
When I was a young mom, I was enrolled in an honors psychology class at my community college. The professor said he would fail any student with too many absences (I think 2?).
So when I had a babysitting emergency, I showed up to class with an infant and hoped for the best.
The person who got my brother’s lungs sent a thank you letter. And I keep thinking about how part of him remains alive in the 2 people he saved. (Lungs, liver).
Missing my goofy big brother. Glad to know part of him is still here. 💔❤️
When I think about the hustle so many nontraditional and/or underserved students endure, it reminds me that we need to make education more affordable, make rent more affordable, and widen our safety nets. Getting in isn’t enough. We need to make sure all students are thriving.
We became best friends. She is one of my 3 best friends, one of the people who has known me the longest and stood by me through thick and thin.
She posts the cutest pics of us whenever we hang out. Grateful for Jerri. ❤️
#BestFriendDay
A week later, she sat down next to me in Bio class. “You’re the one who brought a baby to psych class?” she asked.
I nodded. Not sure where this was going.
And then she smiled. “That was awesome.”
I’m grateful I made it. I was able to start a scholarship fund at
@MFPLA
after I became an Attending, to help young people in their program achieve their own dreams. Safety nets don’t always exist. But we can create them.
We all have a part to play in helping the next gen.
I think about that job sometimes. About the hard times. The way my family pulled through.
The way my husband and I found ways to stretch every dollar and make sure our kids were ok.
Me, scared but not willing to fail my class, said “you told us we can’t be absent. So I’m here.”
Everyone was looking at me. I was suddenly the teen mom in class. A lot of my peers knew each other from high school. I didn’t know any of them.
I was 19, didn’t have a lot of options. My first professor (English) had been so supportive when he heard my baby coo. I ended up taking 3 classes with him before I transferred to UCLA a few years later.
But my psych professor-
We stared at each other for a long, tense moment. A battle of wills. “I did,” he said. He slowly resumed teaching.
The girl in the front, the one he’d belittled, was staring at me.
He was known for being mean. He’d belittled a girl in the front row a few classes earlier.
Halfway through the lecture, my baby made a noise. He stopped everything, noticed me, and said “IS THAT A BABY?”
The worst part about this story is that when my bff Michelle read about it in my memoir she was like “yeah 3 family members had policies on me when I was homeless.”
Like, that shouldn’t be legal. We were minors. Full stop.
My longest time best friend is Michelle, a girl I met at a homeless teen shelter when I was 16. She didn’t judge me too much and we ran into each other from time to time.
We became best friends when I was 18. I was homeless, pregnant, and she ran into me at a summer bbq.
My kids tell me Michelle is their favorite Auntie. Because you know I’ve made a whole ginormous chosen family over the years.
Here’s Michelle, attending a concert with me that my youngest really wanted to go to:)
I only agreed to go on the show because he said he’d pay us $200. He was mean on the show and kept getting the audience to yell at us, then brought out some fake psychologist.
And gave us $100 in ones. Steve guarded the door while he ran out of the building.
I remember sitting at the nurse’s station in January of 2018, writing a note. One of the nurses asked me a personal question and I told her, “You know, I think I finally realized that my life was just meant to be hard.”
She laughed and said, “Come on, you’re a doc. You probably-
She immediately let me move in with her, even though it disrupted her own housing and made it much more temporary than it had been.
I stayed with her until a few weeks before my kid was born. And have always appreciated how kind she was. She gave me a chance to survive.
We hadn’t seen each other for awhile. She’d turned 18 first and gone to a different shelter.
But there’s a connection forged over such significant pain and struggle.
She asked me where I was staying. I confessed I’d been sleeping at the 24h McDonalds.
Capping nurses’ pay? During a pandemic that shows no signs of stopping? When we don’t have nursing ratio caps in 49/50 states???
Cap admin/C suite salaries. Cap salaries of the insurance companies. Don’t come for the nurses.
This won’t turn out the way you expect.
When I was in residency, my stethoscope broke and my attending bought me a new one because I couldn’t afford to replace it.
A student that I mentor told me that he was saving up to buy his first stethoscope so I bought him a shiny new steth in his favorite color.
#PayItForward
Didn’t have a “baby.” It was a molar pregnancy and it broke me. I couldn’t even get pregnant right. (Not that I’d been trying but hey, that’s what my traumatized 17yo brain thought.)
Actually as I’m writing this I realize I gave you the wrong number if bffs. I have four. Wow, life is awesome.
When I took my first attending job, the program coordinator Kayla and I bonded over our Star Wars keychains. She quickly became my work kid sister/work wife.
She chatted with me as I wrote my memoir and still lets me pitch all my stories to her. She is so sweet and shares my love of Broadway so I’ve gotten to go to a bunch of shows with her and her girls. ❤️ Here we are at Lion King.
When I was 17, I graduated from high school. Even though I was homeless, I found an independent studies high school that gave me work I could complete “at home” and I did that work mostly at my public library.
I think the best thing about best friends is when they meet each other and love each other. I have had the chance to introduce several of them to each other over the years.
Recently, Trish, Jerri, and Kayla joined me for the
@MFPLA
gala. (Michelle had to work).
And Trish is my med school bestie. She was actually in a different semester and we met when I worked on orientation for her class (I worked every chance I got in med school).
We message daily and she has come all the way to CA to visit me several times :) Here she is at LAX.
I think that’s the coolest thing about best friends. They each hold a special place in my heart and I love when they rally around the one thing that is nearest and dearest to my heart - they all know how passionate I am about ending youth homelessness and they show up for me.
Kindness. A thread on paying it forward.
When I was 18, I had to go to work immediately after being kicked out of the homeless youth program that I’d been staying in. I was ~5 mo pregnant & was “too pregnant” to stay there anymore.
An intern, on his first day of training, changed my life. And he continued to show up and speak kindness for his entire training.
I will always be grateful to Dr. A. Broudy. And I will always advocate for trainees because I know how much of a difference they can make.
11.
@peteynmj
I know from personal experiences that the people who tend to give everything to help others have usually overcome major life traumas. We don’t want others to suffer the way we did.
I’m hoping we can all pay it forward. Imagine if everyone saw the world like that?
@PereraJacob1
I’ll never understand it either. I was really hoping to get a coffee shop job back then and I stumbled into a cool kid’s clothing shop that was filled with the sweetest employees.
But then I sat down and ruminated on my thoughts. I’d always said I would write my story after my mom passed. I hadn’t wanted to hurt her. Her mental illness wasn’t her fault. She’d truly loved me, but she hadn’t been able to give me what I needed.
Had great parents, grew up rich, had an easy life.”
I was still processing the grief of saying a final goodbye to my mom that week. Hospice. So I just politely disagreed and walked away.
@Joe_Roberts01
I stole one once. I was 19, barely off the streets. My kid was hungry and something was wrong with my food stamps. I didn’t know what else to do. I’ve never forgotten that moment.
And that kid just graduated from college with honors.
I thought about the hard things. Losing my oldest brother to suicide the previous year had broken me and I was still trying to pick up the pieces. And then our mom was gone.
This is the last pic of her when she was well. Back when I was in med school and my kiddos were small.
When my first baby was a few months old, I couldn’t afford her formula.
I hadn’t been able to successfully breastfeed. My WIC checks weren’t due yet. I didn’t have enough food stamps.
I had barely gotten off the streets myself and we were in unstable housing.
1/
Had I grown up easy? No. Absolutely not.
Had I come through it with an unwavering desire to make the world a safer, easier place for young people? Absolutely.
It took a whole lot of healing before I was ready to write and talk about what I survived.
For me, the goal is and always will be to end youth homelessness.
I need all of us to care & all of us to reach out to our legislators. We need housing & resources for young people.
I like to remember her during the good times, before her mind stole her happiness. She loved my babies. She was a good person. I’ll always miss the good times, the before times.
My kid kept reading. I kept writing. One night after work, I got home and my kiddo started to cry.
“Mom, I got to the part where you met dad. Please tell me it works out.”
So, please explain to me why this book is often banned? Why we’re banning so many books that can help young people figure out their own lives? Because we shouldn’t be. We should let young people read and find their own paths.
We need formula for every baby that needs it. Regardless of ability to pay.
The formula shortage is a public health crisis. And grifters raising the price on limited supplies will cause babies to starve.
@POTUS
we need solutions. Now.
Tagging my governor
@GavinNewsom
. Hi! I stopped by on
@cafp_familydocs
annual advocacy day in March, didn’t get a chance to talk to you but I left my contact info with your secretary. Would love to chat about ending youth homelessness. :)
@Joe_Roberts01
I remember I had a college professor that said people in the future would look back at us and judge our choices. The fact that we had stores full of food and people who were starving infuriated her.
She taught me to forgive myself and expect more out of all of us.
I think sometimes we forget about community. True community is reaching out and helping people in their time of need with no expectations of ever being repaid. True community is giving to help others move forward.
I stayed there for a few months, then ultimately came back again for a few more months after my baby was born. He explained slowly over time that he was undocumented and often people who have nothing give everything to help others.
After my kid finished reading it, I felt less afraid. If it didn’t change the way they saw me, I could handle whatever my peers might think.
So I took a chance. I shared it with the world a few days after my mom’s birthday.
I worried a bit. What would my colleagues think? Would it shock them to know I’d run away at 13, from NC to CA?
Or that my dad had pressed charges because I’d stolen money when I ran, landing me in maximum security juvenile prison for 10 months?
@_marching_Ents_
Just going to add that one of the first things my mom invested in after she divorced my dad was a funeral plot for my 3 stillborn sibs. My dad was against it. In case you really think he was interested in saving up for a potential funeral. (I don’t.)
My kid was an excellent alpha reader. Told me where I needed to explain more. What surprised them. What secrets I had revealed that finally explained my/our family.
On a scale of 0 to seething outrage, how mad should I be that somebody called in an active shooter threat to my hospital because we offer Covid vaccines?!
Feel free to tag your legislators and ask them to read this thread. I am willing to speak with anyone in office who is ready to make changes and help young people experiencing homelessness. We have an epidemic and it’s time we end this.
@katsteiner
To be fair, getting off the streets and remaining housed, healthy… that’s the goal. And everything else is just beautiful. I celebrate all of us that survived it and can’t wait until we have a permanent solution that eliminates youth homelessness altogether.
That was how I discovered Maya Angelou. I was asked to read I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings.
And that book has remained my favorite for my entire life.
I remember sitting at Starbucks that summer, frantically pouring my heart and soul into my story. And then I sat nervously next to my then 14yo and let them read it.
Probably should drop a reminder - 100% of the proceeds from my June memoir sales for Hindsight will be donated to
@MFPLA
. Trying to end youth homelessness and help the young people who are currently struggling. We’re up to $1600 already, let’s keep going!
Yesterday I had the amazing opportunity to talk about my favorite things-
@MFPLA
& why we need to
#EndYouthHomelessness
. I was joined by Heather Carmicheal, MFP’s executive director. Here’s the radio interview from
@knxnews
.
I’m so grateful for
@kevinmd
and his amazing network of physicians and healthcare professionals who work tirelessly to tell important truths to the world.
Here’s my truth:
That memoir spoke to me. It was Maya’s story of surviving a horrific childhood and unapologetically owning her experiences. She gave me strength before I even had the words to understand my own story.
@nursenenni
Many ways. Reach out to local legislators, volunteer at local programs, work with programs that are focusing on housing. There are some great programs that work in small areas & we need a lot more to help young people already out there and prevent more from losing housing.
His lesson stayed with me. Over the years, my husband and I have easily agreed to let others stay with us when they needed a boost. I was just thinking about some of my med school friends this evening and remembered a few of them.
I remember sitting for hours in my little cubicle at the library on Ivar in Hollywood.
My teacher assigned some pretty important books for me to read for 12th grade English.
So, a sad update. We’re taking our pup home for doggy hospice. He has metastatic cancer. He’s the goodest rescue dog ever and doesn’t do well in hospitals. We’re going to focus on his comfort/quality of life. I’m glad he found us.
Could use a little thanksgiving miracle… sitting at the animal hospital with our dog. He’s super sick and they’re trying to figure out what he has.
(Vets have such a tough job because animals can’t even tell you what’s wrong.)
Mentioning here since a few have asked in the comments. I wrote a memoir about my experiences on the streets, hoping to help raise awareness and ultimately end youth homelessness. ❤️
Survived a terrifying car accident last night. Walked away after being hit at high speed by a drunk driver. Sore but no major injuries.
I feel like I still have so many big things to do and I need to do all of them. Bucket list being reactivated.
She was pregnant and they already had a kid. I told her they could stay with us. I’d seen her around but didn’t know her.
I told her, “We have space. You can stay with us.”
Her: “But you don’t even know us.”
Me: “I know you need a place to stay.”
I’ll never forget the moment I *knew* I wanted to be a doctor.
I was barely 19, sitting in the hospital bed, recovering from an emergency c-section, holding my newborn and listening to the hospital background noise as I rocked her to sleep.
Also, I’m now the first alumni on the board of directors for
@MFPLA
. They work tirelessly to help change the lives of young people. They certainly changed mine. If you’re able to volunteer or donate to them, I’d be eternally grateful.
Husband & son serving a meal. (He made it.)
How much better could we be if we all looked around and really saw/heard others in our communities and made sure they were safe, fed, housed, healthy, and all their most basic needs were met? How much more beautiful could our world become?
I arrived with my tiny baby and was greeted with love, kindness, and 3 jars of formula.
It took a long time before I realized she probably bought me that formula herself.
4/
I often think about the people that helped me along the way, the ones that never learned how far I made it. How huge that gift was because it kept moving forward. I imagine the world like that, with a ripple effect started by kindness.
They stayed with us and it was a blessing. Our kids played together and he passed his test. We stayed friends and I celebrated when he matched and they had a few more babies over the years.
Imagine, whenever a doc tells their young patient that they can be anything… what if it’s the first time they’ve heard it? Or the first time in awhile? What if that encouragement changes the world?
10/
We have too many administrators in healthcare. 10 for every 1 physician.
I think we could better use that money to hire more essential staff, provide adequate PPE, and possibly even fund more residency positions across the US.
The time is NOW for big changes in medicine.
So my husband drove all the way to my Locums assignment to bring me tacos and say hi, because I got a hotel since I was too tired to drive home. That’s love.
@Zzzorsha
@buzbeebooks
@Maloney_EA
I recall a calculus class in undergrad where all of the women dropped out except me and another girl... male prof refused to call on girls or answer our questions. It was ridiculous and frustrating.
Just paid my oldest kid’s final college tuition. I’m one quarter away from being the mom of a college graduate.
❤️AND❤️
She was the baby I gave birth to when I was 19 and had just gotten off the streets. Her life has been so remarkably different from mine. I love her so much.
I have always wanted to thank the 2 high school teachers who helped me graduate when I was a homeless teen, but I’ve never been able to find them.
Can Twitter help me locate them?
Valerie & Roger Hunter. Taught at Hollywood AEWC (continuation school) in the 90s.
Soon after, she brought another coffee shop employee over to meet me. I’d seen him around but never spoken to him. He told me “you can stay with me.”
Me, the kid who had been searching for housing for the past few years… it didn’t make sense. People weren’t just… nice.