Ola @ItsHimOlaa Twitter profile

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

3 years

Sometimes in the moment you don’t understand the significance of a moment until it’s passed. Goodnight everyone...

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Please forget sex and weed, nothing is sweeter than having your own money in your account. Unexplainable 😍

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Don't forget that your December salary has to last you for the next 4 months of January. 😪😪😪

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Buying airtime via mobile banking is fun and addictive and it is the fastest way to get broke. 😥

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

On my weddding day Me and my wife will be dancing from table to table with our POS, you can’t come and eat rice and meat for free. 😌😌😌

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

A danfo driver can stop to pick you where there's no bus stop, but this same driver will refuse to drop you where there's no bus stop and to an extent it proves that people only need you when it's beneficial to them.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

It's only in Nigeria you will shout up nepa and they will immediately take the light and the person next to you go dey vex say "why you shout? You for no shout!!! 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

My neighbor bought iPhone with 370k and still has the temerity to beg me for onions, I told him to download it, nonsense 👀

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

When the porn is loading and you start seeing yourself on the screen as a sinner but you gotta be strong for satan. 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Reducing friends and living a private life has nothing to do with pride. Avoiding bullshit isn’t pride.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Dear mosquito, I know your primary duty is to suck blood, but is the singing really necessary. 😓 is your entire community mad 😣

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

So many people hide their pains, come here to laugh all day but go to bed with their pillow soaked with tears, May God heal every part of our lives that is hurting.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Being a baby must be tough, imagine your foot itch, you start crying & your mother gives you milk...😂😭😭😭

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Instead of telling police that robbers were operating in my area, I called them and said yahoo boys were dragging out bags with loads of cash. Guess who arrived Couple of minutes later??? 👀

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

I respect a chick who is vocal. Tell me why you’re into me. Tell me why I pissed you off & tell me how I can fix it. Tell me everything. Talk.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Have you noticed that on WhatsApp, the people who don't like you and chat with you often are the first to view your status. 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

The biggest lie I tell myself is "I don't need to write it down, I'll remember it." 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Dressing good even when you’re broke isn’t fake life, you mustn’t look like a beggar because you’re broke.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

We all got that one friend we can't put on speaker because we don't know what can come out of his or her mouth. 😁

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Do you know you can actually pray without disturbing your neighbor? Do you know God doesn't have ear problem? Many don't know.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

If not for my passion for walking, what is G wagon that I cannot buy. 🙄😭😭😭😩

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Dear Nigerians, there is a difference between WhatsApp status and gallery. How can someone be putting 50 pictures on WhatsApp, is it memory card or waist bead 😂😕😕

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Get so rich that when your girl wants to argue you just hit your hand on the table and say you know what? lets go argue in Paris. 😍

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Your girl has a guy that she specifically texts after you upset her...🌚

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Once upon a time multiplication table was the hardest thing in life. 😭😭😪

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

If you’re in a bus and someone is looking at your chat, just turn on the front camera so you can be seeing each others face, at least you’ll see stupidity in broad day light. 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Oh allah, please grant every unemployed graduates out here a good job come 2019.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

14years imprisonment for gay in Nigeria and still put them in the same prison with men, is that not honeymoon? 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

I pray when I come home my children don't go upstairs

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Girls are funny, they would be crying and be looking at the mirror to see if they’re crying cute 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

If you order me to do something that i was already planning on doing... the chances of me doing that thing automatically drops to zero.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

When your battery is low that's when the chat becomes sweeter. 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

A definition of "you just played yourself" is when you save money and you go behind your own back to spend it. 😂😂😂😭

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

I swear Channel 100 is mad interesting when you haven’t paid your DSTV subscription. 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

If you want your husband or boyfriend to stay with you in the kitchen, just ask for his phone’s torchlight. He will remain there with you holding the torch light till you’re done. 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Sister, your January period isn’t late, stop waiting for it cause it won’t come. Yes you’re pregnant 😍 Remember what you did to buy Christmas clothes. 🌚

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Marriage doesn't scare me, marrying the wrong person does, but to worsen the matter.....marrying into the wrong family.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Pressing phone inside toilet cannot end in 2018, we’re taking it to 2019. That one is a destined carryover 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Some people can cry, go down on their kneels, have serious emotional breakdown in your presence and still be lying. 😐😬😬

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Block your mother's slap and everybody in the family will hear how you tried to kill her. 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

I asked a bus conductor on the island if he knew what the zebra crossing meant. Baba legit said "sebi Tom Tom advertisement ni" 😭😭😭

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

That ugly selfie you just deleted is the real you, take it or leave it. 🌚🌚🌚

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Get that degree. Apply for that job. Date that person. Buy that plane ticket. Move to that city. Do all the things that scare you, they’re worth it.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

In Nigeria if you're sick and press phone, people won't believe you're sick. They want you to be half dead and almost lifeless before they believe you. 😐

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

After a Lady has eaten like 3 meat in the kitchen..she'll now put 2 for you and only 1 for herself and be forming "I don't eat much" 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

I hate when girlfriends say "Don't worry, he's just a friend." I remember when i was just a friend too.. I know what we did. 😐😐😐

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

If someone is 25 and still decides to stay put in their parents house, how’s it your business? Is it your daddy’s house they’re occupying? 🙄

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Having kids is like having broke little best friends that think you’re rich. 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

When you feel sad, just remember there is someone out there that wants to masturbate but has no arms. Be grateful 😥

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

If you want an argument with a woman to get intense just say "my mother was right about you" 😂😂😂😭

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Girls shoot their shot by staring at you every other 13 seconds and wait for you to notice. 😏

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

When you're at a party and someone calls you by your twitter handle.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Many guys go broke trying to prove they’re not broke to women who are broke.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Snitching on your colleagues at work won’t get you a salary increase or promotion, it will only make your boss know that you’re a betrayal who shouldn’t be trusted with vital information of the company. Don’t play yourself!!!

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

If our parents know some of the things we have licked, they won't let us use their spoons. 🌚🌚😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

In a relationship the one with the shortest response in chats controls the relationship. 😂😭😭

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

This girl thought she broke my heart, heart that is wearing screen guard 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Any marriage that will bring us depression or push us to commit suicide. May it never hold!!! May it scatter at dating stage...

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Telling me to send you 5k isn’t a problem, what annoys me is that 100 naira you tell me to add on top so you can withdraw the full 5k. What is really your problem? 😭😭😭🌚

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

When a hen is chased by a cock for mating it runs for 2 meters and gets tired then caught. But when you Chase it for something else it can run the whole day...scum 😟😭

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Yesssss... I’m the happiest person right now... My aunt is among the women sharing food in this party & this is the second plate I’m having. Connection is truly important 😍

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

In every house there’s that one person who drinks water out of the freezer but never refills the bottle.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

When your girl don't have any hair for you to pull during sex, so you start slapping her head. 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

If you tell your partner your problems and they reply with "what are you going to do" instead of "what are we going to do" trust me you're dating one of your problems. 😥

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

I vividly remember back in secondary school how everything in this life can happen but a maths teacher willl never get sick. 😂😭

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

We all have that social media friend we haven’t met before but they’re a big part of our lives.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

When the amount of sleep you’re having is becoming suspicious, only for you to wake up and see that you still have about three hours to sleep 😍😍😍

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

No matter how troublesome you are as a kid, if your mum puts you in between her legs just forget it. You’re finished 😭😭😭

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Whenever I buy food, I don't know why my siblings look at me like we're related or something. 😕

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Trying to explain twitter jokes to someone who isn't on twitter is an extreme sport.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

4 years

Nothing hurts African parents than seeing their kids relaxing and pressing phone. You just have to be doing something 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

African parents need to understand that being sick or having headache doesn’t make me incapable of pressing phone and neither does pressing phone makes anyone sick. 🌚

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Before you start making a long list of what you want in a man, make list of what you offer as a woman.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Someone somewhere is actually waiting for your relationship to scatter so they can make their intention known. 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Liverpool is a proper example of don’t judge a man by his first round alone.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

A person can be in the UK and not be ok, in the US and still be useless. Every good thing comes from above not abroad.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

I was once talking to a girl on webcam and her dad walked in... I pretended to be an advertisement. 15 miserable seconds of my life 😭😭😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

There was once a time that i used to think that people with DSTV were rich...😐

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

A large number of Nigerians are depressed but don't show it.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

People can be broken inside & still smile all day. To everyone going through DEPRESSION, God will come through for you.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

How many times do you have to catch your man cheating with the same girl before you realise that it's you he's cheating with?

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

You think being single & lonely is tiring? Try be in a relationship with someone who doesn't have your time 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

The African in me will not allow me to know that my phone is water resistant. I don't play with things like that cause our water and their water aren't the same. 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

The destiny of sugarcane is to be cut at the time of its sweetness. May we not be cut off at the time we start to flourish and prosper in life.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Because you travelled to the abroad now you keep asking me “how’s Africa”🙄 did you leave Africa in my hand 😏

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Those who dress smartly, look good and smell nice but still wear a wrist watch that isn’t working are part of the problems we have in this country.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Being broke is a terrible thing, everything will look impossible, you’ll always feel you’re not good enough, you'll look lazy and unambitious to people. It’s a tragic state ☹️

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

No matter how neat a N50 Note is, it will never be as valuable as a dirty N1000 note! Never always rate people's worth by what you see.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Tell Nigerians to keep your seat at an event while you absent for a bit and they will protect it with the devotion of a security man.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

I thank God for protecting me from what I thought I wanted and blessing me with what I didn't know I needed.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Women are loved unconditionally... But men are loved based on what they can provide...😮😕

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

The best way to hurt a Nigerian is to serve food to everyone sitting around him and skip him. 😂😂😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

Who told Nigerian students that after WAEC and NECO the next chapter in life is computer school. 😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Pidgin English is the only language where question and answer can be the same thing. Question: Light dey? Answer: Light dey.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

6 years

If you knock on my door and I say "yes" it doesn't mean "come inside!" it means "stay where you are and state your business." But Nigerians 😭😭😭😂

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Interviewer: Why do you want to work in customer service? Me: Well, I'm really good at apologizing for things that aren't my fault 🙄

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

These Nigerian goats are so disrespectful, they’ll be staring at you as if they know you somewhere.

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

If you think you're single and lonely just remember someone is in love but is being cheated on. 😪

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

I tell you I have a girlfriend and you stop pursuing me? How is that any of your business? Its like you don't want true love abi 😂

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@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

I know the competition is tough but don’t buy yourself an engagement ring. No it’s not that deep 🙄

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Ola

@ItsHimOlaa

5 years

Imagine being ugly and still not knowing how to take pictures. 😫😭😭😭

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