M. @Hangintheredude Twitter profile

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M.

@Hangintheredude

4 years

I'm making a running thread of the stories I write. If you want an index this is the tweet to follow...

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Classified file photo of Pakistan's premier nuclear research facility: Baryon-Radium Atomic Ionization Lab [BRAIL-V]

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 months

For those who don't know, Khurram Dastagir k baap ne Gujranwala ki sarrkon par aik kutti k galay main Laltain daal kar parade karwaayi thi. Laltain Mohtarma Fatima Jinnah ka intekhaabi nishan tha. Aaj Pakistan ne Madr e Millat ki toheen ka hisaab chukta kia hai.

Moiz Ur Rehman

@MoizUrRehman_

3 months

PTI has defeated Khurram Dastagir from Gujranwala by almost 20,000 votes! This is massive! Fatima Jinnah ka direct badla liya hai!

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Army bringing out tanks in Punjab? Their own power centre? Good. Let the people see them for what they are. A military that thinks they're above all of us-- regardless of ethnicities.

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@Hangintheredude

3 months

That's the granddaughter of a Pakistan Army Chief. As elite a Punjabi as one could find. And next to her is a Baloch man who walked for miles just to ensure no one else goes through what his sons and daughters have over the years at the hands of the same military. Kia zarf hai

Rizwan

@Rizwow

3 months

God may not forgive us for what we have done to such beautiful Baloch people. People are inherently simple and innocent till you push them off the edge of sanity. This is so beautiful yet sad.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

I grew up seeing an educated boy murdered in broad daylight by the spawn of a feudal fuckface from Interior Sindh. PPP took out rallies in the murderer's defense, tried to get him out of the country, even gave him PS4s in jail. So no, IK didn't "radicalise" me. PPP did.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

I was raised in Karachi when Muttahida's bastards were going around torching buses and shoving TTs in people's faces on the orders of that fat drunk cunt from London so I would recommend MQM supporters sit the cult discussion out.

اسد

@zarathustra_3

1 year

Scenes at Zaman Park tells how extreme the cult of Imran Khan is. A pathetic coward afraid of going to jail has put the lives of blind cultists on line because he is too scared to see from behind the bars. Cult worshippers.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 month

"Bismillah karein"

The Fool™ On The Hill

@VirtuallyExists

1 month

Guys what's an Urdu equivalent for bon appetit?

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

"Sir ye toh keh raha hai Foreign Policy Prime Minister ka prerogative hai. Kia karein? Job chorrdein?"

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Bilawal k khilaaf main Tehreek e Tahaffuz e Urdu ka ailaan karta huun. Sar e aam qatal kar raha hai meri zubaan ka.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 months

Hear me out: Sher Afzal Marwat as the Minister of Defense. Koi maai ka laal COAS chain of command break kar k dikhaaye phir.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

4 months

For a party that was derided as burger and Social Media kids, Pakistan Tehreek Insaaf has sustained crackdowns, jails, the complete neutralisation of the leadership, internet closures, complete disbandment and even now it stands tall. Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 months

The G in GHQ stands for Girl Math

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

I swear to God Misbah gets undue hate for that 2007 WC. He was the only batsman standing on the crease to the end when geniuses like Malik Kami and Lala went out in single digits. Almost saw us through too. Unreal slander against the man who would've been the hero of that match.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

For an organisation that is primarily known for their real estate ventures, ironic how Pak Fauj lost the plot

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Economy so shit even Karsaz ki dulhan had to get a side hustle

Sanam Maher

@SanamMKhi

1 year

its getting weird here. tonight in karachi.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

🌱

@alIidoishate

1 year

trying to explain to my father how sun light takes 8 minutes to reach the earth so the fast opens 8 minutes before the maghrib time technically

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Remembering Perween Rehman this Women's Day, who was murdered in broad daylight and still awaits justice. To her courage, her commitment to ensuring possession to the city's dispossessed, and her documentation of Karachi's plunder by mafias—MQM, ANP, PPP, TTP and the military.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

If there's one thing that's apparent from Arshad Sharif's murder, it's that ours isn't a rogue military. It is an institution *designed* to consume us, the people it is sworn to protect, just so the Generals can play at being gods.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 years

We won against India. In a World Cup. With 10 wickets. Atheists explain this.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Faujeets crying about people trespassing into Corps Commander's house as qabza? My brother in camo brains, how do you think Fauj™ got those lands in the first place????!?

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Another banger meme from Catboy_jinnah.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Tehreek e Tahaffuz e Namoos e PPP out in full swing. Sahi dhanda hai inka bhi.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Itne toh dunya main mulk nahin hain bhai jitni peeche hamari position hai

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Please let me know when PTI makes a militant wing, establishes torture cells under unelected Sector In charges answering to none but a violent thug, gleefully tells its cadrse to pick up arms instead of books, engages in extortion, thuggery, and ethnic profiling.

Hassan🔻

@hassaninexile

1 year

As if the situation rn is any different? If MQM is that bad then you guys are LITERALLY the same 😂😂😂😂😂😂

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M.

@Hangintheredude

4 months

Only in Karachi can you get 5 khasta piping hot daal kachoris straight out of the karahi with unlimited Tarkari + raita + achaar for a grand total of 100 rupees Jewel of the federation, the people's city for a reason

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Ye kal k bachay hain jinhein L nahin pata hai violent protests kia hote hain. Saari zindagi fouji chhaoni main guzari hai inhein kia pata baaqi mulk main kia hota hai. Violent protests main loug apne biwi bachon samait nahin nikalte, aik bike 2 loug aur 4 TT hoti hain.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

5 months

The 5G in Umar Saif's telecom policy stands for 5 Generals personally approving your access to the internet.

Ministry of IT & Telecom

@MoitOfficial

5 months

Pakistan is set to launch 5G service next year, with plans to auction 300 MHz spectrum. Dr. @umarsaif #5G #Internet #MOITT #Connectivity

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Just clocked the price of a KG chicken. 680 Rs ffs. That's it, I'm out. If any green card holding aunty is looking for a companion, please hit me up. I cook, I clean, I'm good with animals. Hell, I'll even serenade you with a ghazal or two. Just let me out, man. ;-;

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Anas Tipu explains what happened in Baldia under Altaf's orders:

Anas Tipu

@teepusahab

1 year

😭😭😂😂😂😂 this gonna burn them down

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Dar ne London bhaag lena hai, Miftah Bhai arabpati industrialist hain. Iss saari bakwaas main lagay sirf mere aur aapke hain.

Anas Tipu

@teepusahab

1 year

🤪🤪🤪

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Agar PPP ko dhaandhli karwa k jitwana hi hai toh bharwon aik hi dafaa aag laga do iss shehr ko! @OfficialDGISPR Chutiyaap toh band karo ye intikhaab ka!

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

Bahadur Shah Zafar, makhsoos idaare main naukri milne k baad:

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Barely a couple of hours in and PTI has already come up with Thief Minister Hamza Shahbaz 😭😭 I know which party is winning the pun war.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

"Anwar Maqsood is a misogynist pig! 😡😡😡" says Shehzad from LUMS as he listens to Faris Shafi meticulously detail in an expletive laden rant how he and what positions he would fuck women in like the conscientious cultured man he is. 😌😌

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 months

After my 4th semester, the boys and I went out for an all-nighter. Must've been right after the VONC. Langarkhaane khatam huwe the. Islamabad jese shehr main raat k 2 bajay hadd e nigah tak mazdoor tabqa khulay asmaan talay so raha tha Maine apne vote ka faisla usi din karlia tha

Adeem Ghaffar Rana

@ranaadeem

3 months

It's better to end Langar Khanay, and kattay wachay, rather than stop funding of the universities. The place which can equip the students to get a degree and be useful for the society.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Urdu ginti ki aik baat mujhe hamesha se tang karti hai. Saare 9 waale number apne aglay aane waale number k tarz par likhe jaate hain. Jese unees, bees. Unnatees, tees. unnchaas, pachaas. Unaasi, assi. Lekin 89, 90 par saara rhythm kharab hojata hai. Navaasi, nawwe. Hai koi tukk?

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@Hangintheredude

3 years

The Urdu word hamnafas (ہم نَفَس) signifying a trusted friend, or literally, of the same breath, originates from the farsi nafas (نَفَس) meaning breath. [not to be confused with nafs (نَفس)- the self or desire.] When you call someone hamnafas, you make a bond on breath itself.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

If I had a penny for the times someone from Sindh with "Progressive, Secular, Humanist" in their bio turned out to be a racist...

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Malik Amin Aslam almost made me consider Environmental Engineering as a major and people don't even know about the great job he did as SAPM. We have failed you, sensei @aminattock 😔😔

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M.

@Hangintheredude

5 months

Tried my best to translate Dr Refaat Alareer's poem to Urdu. He will always be remembered as an unapologetically Palestinian poet whose very existence was an act of resistance. May his memory live on forever.

blkp🔻

@blkpaws

5 months

Came across Dr. Refaat Alareer's poem "If I must die" just a few days ago, I cried and couldn't help but translated it to Chinese without his permission. Now that he's gone.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 years

What happens when you tell the boys we have a makeup class ft. @SaadReactsOnly

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 month

Mutaalaa e Pakistan crying in a corner somewhere

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Can't believe I can support Khan in good conscience as a Karachiite after this. I mean, really? Calling the military beghairat, besharam but not bharwe? No representation smh.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 years

A lot of people get confused between numerators and denominators even though there's a fine line between them.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Asad Umar Jani ko Karachi ka command dedo agli dafa, vafaaq main zaya hi horaha hota hai mera banda. Probably the only leader I admire without any reservations.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 years

I identify as a problem. My pronouns are dy/dx

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Advice to people getting picked up by the military: just tell them you're responsible for killing their kids. They'll let you go without any repercussions. Just ask Ehsanullah Ehsan.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 month

Major Saad was 30 years old. Turaab Zaidi was 35. Both were parents. Both were shot in cold blood in the streets of Karachi. One belonged to the institution responsible for this mess. The other worked in a call center. Guess which one was mourned and called a shaheed?

Karachi Alerts

@Khi_Alerts

1 month

کراچی میں عید پر بھی ڈکیتی مزاحمت پر 2 بچوں کا باپ قتل گلشن چورنگی کے قریب 35سالہ تراب زیدی اے ٹی ایم سے پیسے لے کر نکلا تھا کہ ڈکیتوں نے لوٹ مار کے دوران فائرنگ کرکے قتل کردیا، مقتول کو ایک گولی سر پر لگی جو جان لیوا ثابت ہوئی، مقتول 2 بچوں کا باپ اور کال سینٹر میں کام کرتا تھا۔

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

I mean only one of them was involved in the first coup attempt against a civilian government sooo-

Jorjor wel🐾🍉🔻

@Lanaschild_

2 years

Allama Iqbal is the National poet of Pakistan but Faiz Ahmed Faiz isn't? Ok.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

What most people can't seem to get through their thick skulls is that people hate Purana Pakistan more than they ever loved PTI. I'll call PTI on it's bullshit too, I just refuse to tolerate the other guys while I'm at it.

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@Hangintheredude

3 years

Astronauts are called "khalapaima" [ خلاپیما ] in Urdu. The word itself is a compound comprised of "khala" (خَلا) [void, space] and "paima" (پیما) [those who measure]. Thus, in Urdu, astronaut ( خَلاپیما) literally means "Those who measure the void."

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 years

Man, things like these make me wish I was back home. Meet Bakra next door (roof????)

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

At D chowk rn. Air's thick with smoke. Had to put out two two fires using water I'd carried. A lot of people her, including women children and babay. Atmosphere's electric. Guys cleared two containers using just their combined pushes. XD Zohair toru should've been here.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 months

Don't understand why PTI's hypothetical moves get more condemnations than the PPP and PMLN's very real, very well-documented, very evident, very present reality.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

4 months

🇵🇰🇵🇰🇵🇰MAIN SHAHEEN HUUN IQBAL KA🇵🇰🇵🇰🇵🇰🇵🇰

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M.

@Hangintheredude

4 years

Why are all PhD researchers single? Because their proposals never get approved.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

4 months

Legend has it, Sector In Charge is still waiting for Immi K to run away like his idol Altaf.

Anas Tipu

@teepusahab

2 years

Ruko zara sabar karo abhi toh Khan sahab ne mulk se bhaagna bhi hai.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

@Lanaschild_ kia huwa gar Iqbal hamare qaumi shayar hain? Faiz bhi toh aakhir hamare Commie shayar hain?

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M.

@Hangintheredude

4 years

Islamabad's air has a bite to it. As if it creeps within you, enveloping you in an icy embrace. There's a certain chill, an indescribable edge to it.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

So we must learn to question them. To their face. The Bajwas and the Nadeem Anjums, the Faiz Hameeds and the Musharrafs. No point in hiding behind euphemisms and allusions. No point in hiding either. They know who you are already.

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Enough Politics, look at this joke my sister came up with 😭😭😭

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

Founded by the inimitable nuclear physicist Dr. Khadim Hussain Ph(en)D. (seen below), the facility is notorious for its iconic radioactive green glow—caused by the lack of shielding due to loss of funds...which were expropriated for constructing DHA Golf Course-II

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M.

@Hangintheredude

3 years

If you think about it, Karachi is basically Gotham Murderous clown causing chaos everywhere ✅ Rich fat penguin looking mf ✅ Crime baron who's above the law ✅ Handsome guy who promised he was a saviour but turned out to be two faced ✅

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

Karachi k ghareeb k bijli k rates main 9 rupay per unit izafa ho, Punjab k liye subsidy ho. Lekin agar koi iss imtiaz par kuch kehde kehde toh woh ethnic nationalist hogaya. Harkatein karni hain ulti seedhi toh gaaliyan khaane ka hausla bhi rakhein.

Dawar B.

@dawarhbutt

2 years

Ovais bhai becoming a Sindhi hyper-nationalist just because someone else is ruling Punjab, rather than his favourite Buzdar. Murad Ali Shah has a new supporter now. 😂😂😂

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M.

@Hangintheredude

1 year

...I don't think turning Pakistan off and then on again is going solve our issues, mate.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Pakistani lamha jab aap confuse hain k ye tweet fauj k baaray main hai, foreign ministry k baaray main, finance ministry k baaray main, hukoomat k baaray main, opposition k baaray main ya cricket team k baaray main??

g h a u r a

@ghauraghaura

1 year

Boys, tweets k bajayay perform karlete to yeh naubat na aati

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M.

@Hangintheredude

2 years

Just checked the scoreboard. Malik ne 17 balls par 8 runs banaye the... In a fucking T20. A final vs India at that. Kis muun se points maarta hai bhai ye aadmi??!?

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

If the generals were concerned with the sanctity of our lives, it would be Altaf Hussain or Ehsanullah Ehsan dead today not Arshad. If they cared abput sovereignty, Raymond Davis would be rotting behind bars, not some kids who wrote something on social media.

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

"Yaar ye kanjervative approach hai" -Vishal Bhai, 2022

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

Haq baat ye hai NCOC k liye main Asad Umer ko jitni duaein duun kam hain. Jis tareeqe se uss shakhs ne vaccination manage ki thi, mujhe uski misaal nahin milti. Mere 90 saala Dada se e kar meri 16 saala behn ko koi dushvaari nahi hui. Khuda usko sada khush rakhe!

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@Hangintheredude

3 months

Khadim Rizvi was so ahead of the curve on AI Popularised O DALL-E! O Sora! before it even came out. Visionary.

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

A house needs a strong guardian, that's true enough. But if the guard dog has gone rabid then it must be put down as such. And the men who have benefited from the status quo will never rise against their benefactors. So we must. The young and the educated.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

BC aik aadmi saal bhar se kehraha hai logoun ko apne faislay karne do, pur aman ehtjaaj haq hai karne do. Itna bara saala woh pacifist hai uske apne supporter usay muun p phattu bolte hain. Goliyaan kha liin phir bhi kaha intishaar nahi. Karlia andar. Bhugto ab.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Giving students in the Global South access to academic resources is...very based of Russia actually

Zev Shalev

@ZevShalev

1 year

Now we know why Z-library was shut down. It was a massive Russian-operated scheme to pirate books and publish them for free thereby diminishing the value of authors’ works and the overall US book market.

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@Hangintheredude

3 years

Kabhi socha nahin tha k main, aik Pakistani Cricket fan, ghar beth kar Indian batting ka mazaaq ura raha huunga jab k meri team top of the table hogi. Waqayi uss ke bhed woh hi jaane.

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@Hangintheredude

3 months

There's this brief period in life where your parents are just old enough to be fun and not stressed, your siblings just young enough to be entertaining rascals and not adults. Every conversation is memorable. Every game of cards, every evening feels like it'll go on forever.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

EXACTLY! THIS! You have to applaud PDM for stopping that by [checks notes] ..getting their own COAS, leading an insane level of crackdown against the opposition to effectively ensure that- [checks notes again] ...IK easily manages to get 2/3rd later on

Shamyl Rizwan Awan

@thatsadshamyl

1 year

Believe it’s about how IK would’ve made Faiz the COAS, would lead to an insane level of crackdown on the opposition, probably weakening them to the point they’re no threat and IK easily manages 2/3 later on for the Presidential system he dreams of.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Islamabad looks at its most exquisite during winter sunsets. (Yes, the Golden Arches of McD are a nod to its burger heritage)

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@Hangintheredude

3 months

Iss RO ka aik aik aansu dhaandli main mulavvis har fauji k khoon se afzal tar hai. Pakistan aapka hai, sir. Ham har aik aansu ka hisaab lenge.

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@Hangintheredude

11 months

Not even a week after the semester and I've cooked two of the best handis I've ever tasted. Not even cooked. Tasted. Apne aap se muhabbat hogayi hai.

M.

@Hangintheredude

11 months

Born to cook, forced to work 😔😔😔

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

I know no one cares but it took us almost 80 pages of calculations, 10 books, idk how many sleepless nights and a very tense WC final viewing to do...this ...say hi to Lunar rover.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Aman Committee k loug shehriyon k sar kaat k football khelte the. Zinda jalaya tha kayion ko. Loot maar, rapes, qatal alag. PPP ki upper tier leadership ki supervision main. Fauj ko dehshatgard lage na kisi aur ko. Unnmain se kisi k sar p fire na huwe. No terrorism sarrr.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Judiciary uses Comic Sans for warrants?!?! This is not a serious country.

Yusra Askari

@YusraSAskari

1 year

Non-bailable warrant of arrest issued in the name of @ImranKhanPTI #Pakistan

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Collaborated with @grey_carnations for a belated Valentine's Day thread ft. Pakistani Politics (and apoliticals) First, the usual suspects

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Saari zindagi aese hi aik terrorist attack se duusre k darmyaan guzar k baray hogaye, kabhi Mehran base, kabhi Karsaz, kabhi numaish. Phir banday ko thori umeed aayi k nahin halaat behtar horahe hain bachon ko acha waqt miljaayega toh wohi zalalat shuru.

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@Hangintheredude

3 months

By the way, PTI is greater than Awami League now in terms of being truly representaty. Apni peak p bhi Mujib raha fundamentally aik ethnicity tak mehdood tha. PTI aur Imran Khan ne har soobay main establishment ko phaar k haath main di hai. Haqeeqi federal party. 🫡

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Fascist tanzeem hoti PTI toh jitni unki iss waqt support hai unhon ne nanga latka dia hota. MQM did worse with a fraction of the support. PPP ki history ki kia baat karuun? Karlo harkatein, acha hai main kehta huun, phir baaqi sab bhi dekh lein violent protest hota kia hai.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

....Bilawal turning into a potbellied uncle as soon as he got his first job in his 30s is the most relatable he's ever been to the average Paki

g h a u r a

@ghauraghaura

1 year

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@Hangintheredude

3 years

Shaitan rn

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@Hangintheredude

4 years

I made the prettiest friend here in Islamabad today.

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

Fellas, is it better for a man to form his own private armed militaria (and still get smoked by his Brother in law) or to take defensive precautions while remaining within the ambit of the law?

Shuaib Rehman

@SMRehmaan

1 year

یہ شخص کلیم کر رہا ہے مجھے مرتضی بھٹو کی طرح مارنا چاہتے ہیں عوام خود فیصلہ کریے

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

I can enjoy PTI slander but I draw the line at glorifying PPP. Hell, I'd gladly cheer for Iblees if he was opposing Zardari and Co. Why would Iblees oppose PPP, you ask? Simple. Market competition.

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@Hangintheredude

4 months

Any kid born and raised in Karachi in the 2000s has multiple stories involving MQM and its Namaloom afraad. The sector in charges, the forced strikes, the open display of arms by its militants. Denying that reality is impossible.

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@Hangintheredude

1 month

You want to stay in Pakistan because you're afraid you'll actually have to work for once in your goddamn life abroad. I want to stay in Pakistan because it has all the people I want to work for and be near to. Our crises are not the same.

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@Hangintheredude

4 years

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@Hangintheredude

1 year

This is the best thing that has ever happened to SMME.

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

Fakhar Zaman today:

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@Hangintheredude

2 years

OH BHAI JUST LOGGED IN TO FACEBOOK AUR MERE ABBA JINKI MINNATEIN KAR K PARK WALK KARNE BHEJTE HAIN WOH BHI JALSAY MAIN GAYE HUWE THE 😭😭😭 Niaziii what have you done?!?!?

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