DIRTY DIKE @DirtyDikeSMB Twitter profile

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DIRTY DIKE

3 months

Want access to all these exclusive beats as I make them? Sample packs? Crunchy rhinoceros drums? Theres 15 crispy MPC bangers already in there waiting for you when you join up 👀 Subscribe to and get the beat every time I break it down 🥁

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

No time for funny remarks here so don’t try be clever, This man has been harassing my little sister for some time now, following here home, knocking on her door, cornering her in shops. I need information about this man asap. Hes from the walthamstow area, has a French accent RT

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@DirtyDikeSMB

2 years

In london you can enjoy a whole night of smoking in pubs if you are prepared to be asked to leave. Sometimes I just treat myself and to an evening smoking where and when I feel like it and moving on. Its alright. the shame to reward ratio is worth it. Id recommend it to you all.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Jeremy corbin follows Dirty Dike on instagram. How real you want you prime minister to be!?!?!? 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

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@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

I dont need to dress and act like a rapper, i am one.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Drakes made himself the dodgy visiting peado uncle of grime and you just let it happen. He’s not even part of the family, and you still keep letting him come round on Christmas day to play with all the kids and their new toys. Why is he here? You know why he’s here.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

I know my neighbours thinking “Whats this guy smoking weed and BBQing to Thin Lizzy in the garden pissed everyday do for a fucking living?” 🤣

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

I chose Dirty Dike so you cunts cant name drop me without looking mental.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Not trying anymore. Fuck all your shitty platforms, your waterty radio shows, paid famous features, dress up box cunts, an dick sucking internet back lickers. Im done with you lot. It was never about you anyway. Next albums is fucking obnoxious and i hope i loose friends 🖕

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

I would argue that forcing a child to pray to a potentially imaginary person in the sky out of fear is not only abusive, but a mental health disorder.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Why weren’t we all taught sign language instead of french of german?

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

1 year

I fucking love a shit pub full of cunts

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

I like the blemishes in life. Your perfections are dead as fuck. I like your scars, mistakes and shit points of view. You know? the things that define you and seperate you from the basic quest for perfect symmetry everyones on. Rub dirt on your head. Say some dumb shit.🙂

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

@BwoyLdn Yup. If you have been theough this or know anyone who has you’ll remember that they say they cant do anything until he does “something”. As far as im concerned he’s already doing something, and id like to approach him before he does the “something” the police are referring to.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

5 years ago i met this young man and produced his first album, took him to his first shows, and got him signed to the label i was on. #chaos93 ➡️

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@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

I smoke weed all day everyday. Fuck 420. Don’t be so dramatic. Stupid weed gimmick. Weeds so fucking normal, it’s a dietary staple, how are you treating it like a novelty? It’s always been there, it always will be, it’s basically tea bags in the cupboard. Get over it. 🙄

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Fucking disgusting, i got 3 years for selling some gurners.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

How many M&S salads is this fucking rich woman gonna eat on this train bro!?!? Is 4 salads form Cambridge to London normal? She just keeps pulling more of the fuckers out and chewing away like that long neck dinosaur from the land before time. Four fucking salads. Noisey ones too

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@DirtyDikeSMB

2 years

Tragic news. Although we never put it out coz im fussy and didn’t like what id done, Jamal reached out to me back in the day to film surrounding the Prawns album. He rolled up to meet me on an electric swegboard and offered me Nados off the bat 😇 Rest in Peace bro. 🙏

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

I like smoking weed all the time. Still.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

If your carrying any drugs over the festive period, remember to wrap em in christmas paper and write ‘Mum’ on the package. Most pigs wont risk the embarrassment without a very good reason.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

I back loyal fans over industry acknowledgment. Industry is just business crafted gimmick based unstable fragile you didnt do this yourself boring. Independent fan base is real life thank you loads satisfaction heart warming we did this together wickedness i love you pure shit ❤️

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@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

One artist i produced a record for, recently tried to add a clause in the contract that said i can never be negative about the album, OR THEM publicly EVER 🤣 What you reckon this geeza hiding man? 🤷‍♂️ Imagine how prang you gotta be to try pull some suss shit like that. Bad hustle

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Theres no way an egg fried this rice

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@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

England, where the poor are fat and the rich are vegan.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Tell you what, fuck it feels good to be back. Ive obviously been planing an creating ALOT during these 2 years, and will have a brand new album and mental tour ready for you soon. P.S my 10 week old son pissed directly in my face today and ive never laughed so hard in my life yo

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Past 10pm ill swear in public as much as i fucking want. Get your delicate childs ears out this fucking resturant, im swearing with my friends.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Out of the 80 spots around the world where BLM protests have been held, the U.K. is the only one to organise a fuc£in8 counter protest 🙄🤦🤬😩 WHAT THE S%IT IS WRONG WITH YOU SPAM LICKING CURTAIN RAILS!?!? GO HOME AND FUCK A CAR BATTERY IN GLASS FILLED SLEEPING BAG.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Just found out weed is illegal.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Game of neckslap. @slowthai 😂👏

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 months

The first album I produced 👀

High Focus Records

@HighFocusUK

4 months

🎂🎂🎂🎂🎂🎂🎂🎂 Join us in wishing @Ocean_Wisdom and ‘Chaos 93’ a HAPPY RELEASE DAY, as his BRILLIANT debut LP turns EIGHT TODAY! ‘Chaos 93’ is OUT NOW ~

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

2 years

Bruv i just went without weed for 5 days. It was fucking shit. Im home now, smoking weed. Its fucking nice.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

7 years

If you don't want to live in a multicultural society with an array of different humans from all walks of life, you're a full on pussy.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Im sorry but if you’ve never taken drugs all of your stories are boring. I dont expect you to understand, Its just the way it is, but Nobodies making a film about one of your sober stories where you all went to bed at the end. Nobody.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

When i was a little kid you just sort of went “out” an that was it. No plan no phone nobody could contact you. Just you, a big stick and your brain for the whole day. If you wanted to see gang you kept your eye out for a massive pile of bikes. Now you got social media and peados.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

Thank you to everyone who’s bought my records over the years. It’s a real privilege to have you pisslickers behind me. I’ll be releasing more music really soon, bare with me. 🙂

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Nobody tells you that in your 30’s all your bloke mates turn into anxious boyfriends, tryna dodge emotional punishment for having any fun outside their relationship. No wonder we all fucking kill ourselves.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

7 years

I might start kidnapping trap kids off the streets of London in a unmarked white van and forcing them into manual labour on buildings sites around the city for the day. Film the whole thing and sell the show to channel 4.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Oi football psychos, how do you not feel manipulated by the biggest anti climax in victory ever? What if we win? Then what? You just go back to your job? Petrol doesn’t go down in price, no tax free month? What exactly do you WIN you possessed emotional uncomposed mess. Calm down

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Musicians, you had a good run. We took the piss for years. Playing songs and laughing our heads off while ground workers dug holes and roofers lugged pallets of tiles up ladders at 7am in winter. I miss it but dont act like it wasn’t the easiest job you had. Performing your songs

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

‘Permanent midnight’ on the outro credits for @frankieboyle ’s latest ‘New world order’ episode. Check the whole thing on @BBCiPlayer 🙂🐌

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Unpopular opinion: Money is not as important as people dancing with each other.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

If you’re on the Internet boasting a weak cider with a fruit twist in the sun as fully grown man, you suck. And you have failed at life. You need to question who your idols were as a kid. You should ring your dad and pump so much abuse into him for what he’s done to you. You prat

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Theres a girl crying in the pub. Its doung my fucking swede in. Who are these people? Why dont they go home? Why are random men coming on to them while they’re crying? What the fuck is life?

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

I dont find all this london tracksuit rap pop music interesting. I miss rugged shit with some dumb humour. Remeber when rap music was basically illegal? I miss that.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

The calendar is man made. All the bad shit that happened in 2017 will happen again in 2018. Bad years are not bad years, they are years, full of life obsitcals and I suggest you remain prepared. Be realistic. 🙂

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Views? Seen em all before mate.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

2 years

One thing i despise is bullying. If i smell bully on you, weather its posh boy snobbery bullying, beating on or taking advantage of a weaker person, i fucking hate you with all my heart from then on. Look after eachother please, especially those with less confidence than you 🙂

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

7 years

Stop pumping your favourite online version of your fake as fuck self into people’s faces with your pocket social crutch. Your a sack of average shit and bones and nobody cares about your new child slang, coat, bars, or the drugs you are on. Build a thing,save a wasp, and shut up.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Stop going to socially distanced raves. Everyone needs to hit the free party and fight the police. Everyone. Don’t settle for a half wank or it will become normal. This isnt right. We gonna have to dance and fight the pigs. Come on with ya, wont take long pussy.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Im this old.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Learning ls mad. You can just be fucking shit at something, start doing its bare, and your sick. Mad.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Back from glasto.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

I wanna a uk tour of socially distanced in store gigs at every DFS in the country before this ronas over. Every group gets a bed to chill on, no bed swapping either ya slags.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

I been tagging snail shells with tip ex and letting them go on their way for 21 years. One day one of you are gonna see one and its gonna blow your mind.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Constant Dikestar is 10 years old today! To celebrate the fu£ker ive made a bunch of unique collectors items with my mental hands. Stay tuned. Dropping Friday.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Took me years to get a legit career and they make it illegal 🤣 Im doing gigs you can fuck off.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

One thing lead to another 🤷‍♂️

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@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Im sorry but the lifestyle i was living was way more tiring than being a dad. If you struggle being a dad you a fucking pussy bro.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Im starting a new sport, its like boxing but im replacing the gloves with whole roasted chickens. Tell me im not a genius.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

2 years

Ready for some new music?

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@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

You know whats pretty embarrassing? That we all chose ourselves little fake names and run about performing under them 😆

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Ive never been “uk hip hop”. Never tried to fit into that coz im not. Im a raver kid from east anglia and ive always repped that. Hold tight my SMB/L4L family.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

I haven’t checked the new Eminem album coz my ignorance is intelligent.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Dirty Dike 10 year anniversary box set dropping tomorrow. Only 50 in the world. I made everyone unique. Hold tight to see whats inside!

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

LADS, you got one job, and it isn’t beating up your woman. I know your mum hit you as a defenceless child, but that wasn’t right either. Learn, you cock sausage.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Be careful who you pretend to be. Maintaining that shit gets more and more embarassing the older you get you fake peice of shit. 🤣

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Buying this coca farm is the best thing ive ever done. Open to gap year volunteers. Cross country mules, one chef for my military, and a masseuse needed too. Serious applications only. 🌱

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Just got off at Tottenham right, theres a some rude boy in a tracksuit with a man bag on pouting at me with his hand down his trousers playing with his nob. Im so confused. Does he wanna bang or fight? Whats this guy up to? Is it leagal to insecurly play with your dick in public?

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Smashing the fuck out of shit, shouting, drugs, drinking in the street, breaking into things, graffiti, and the dirty rave. These are still a few of my favourite things. 🤷‍♂️

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Who’s little brother is this?

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

I got 3 years for 50 pills when i was 19. Not exactly fair but i didnt cry about it.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Went on @RomeshRanga ’s @HHSMLpodcast got pissed on gin and talked for an hour infront of a live studio audience. Bluddy hell.🐌

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Its my birthday today. Still here. Thanks for putting up with me.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Stop letting the fasion industry steal our young spokespeople to sell clothes our culture cant afford without crime. We are musicians. Creatives. Not cunts.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

Ransom badbones is probably the most underrated rapper in this scene. I been listening to him since chester p first brought him out at Taskforce extended family shows, and been like “fuck, that quiet humble guy has a story.” This guy always reminded me of a mortal combat Big L.🔥

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Man got married in a trakkie @RagNBoneManUK 🍾🤾‍♂️🚽

LADbible

@ladbible

5 years

Rag'n'Bone Man and fianceé get married in tracksuits. The perfect wedding doesn't exist... 😂❤️

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

7 years

Im in ikea thinking about leaving little lines of fake cocaine in all the show rooms.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

MANNYS ALRIGHT. FORGOT WHERE I PARKED MY CARAVAN LAST NIGHT AFTER THE SHOW. NOW SPICED OUT MY FUCKING NUT IN THE RAIN OUTSIDE PICCADILLY STATION. WHOS DOG IS THIS AND WHY HAVE I GOT IT?

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

There is nothing worse than a young spoilt little cunt. Nothing.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

“Hi im Jez nice name and im quite safe”

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

🐌07.09.18🐌

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

1 year

I promised you news, here is the news… My brand new album ‘Mattress’ drops on the 2nd of June on @MelonskinRecs 🍉 Entirely produced by my favorite northern friend and label co-founder @petecannonbeats 👀 You can pre order the vinyl now! 😈

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Theres a war goin on outside

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Quite often just taking your trousers off can make you feel so much better about life.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

7 years

Don't fuck it today young homies.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Grime on twitter is making me feel like im back whatching my 13 old sister argue with my mum about who said what in the fucking kitchen last week.

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

Rap music is and always has been explicit. Get that watery, diluted, average content, pop version of it out of our faces.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

Don’t throw your baby in the skip in next doors front garden! Simply bust out a few low notes and have a sorbet you mess 🙂

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Stop saying “calm” when it was never about to get hectic you little nike air drama queen.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Couldnt get in the shop to buy a mask coz i didnt have a mask. Feel like im gonna end up homeless and on crack unable to get out of this loop. This is the trap they speak of isnt it. FUCK!

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@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

New single ‘Woah’ feat @tinfoilfronts just dropped! Go stab that in the side of your head. Full vid: Stream and DL:

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

I push my people forward. If im working with you, you’re getting pushed. Ill invest in your whole project. The plan, the art, the vids, the links. Ill give you what i can. No funny business. Just music and pushing.🙂

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DIRTY DIKE

@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Does it make you feel enlightened posting motivational quotes you didnt write? You feeling enlightened when you screenshot And regurgitate it on your page? “Oh this reflects me” 🤣 NO SHIT! You’re the same as Karen who hangs “Love life” in her living room and thinks shes deep.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

3 years

What triggers anxiety in you isn’t something you can help. What can help is people listening to the things that can make you anxious without blaming or denying you those feelings.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

4 years

Sod the pigs

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@DirtyDikeSMB

5 years

Aaah good old 2011. When i introduced boxers and a spinny hat to rap.

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@DirtyDikeSMB

6 years

Rappers really need to stop announcing what theyre gonna do and just fucking do it. LET YOUR MUSIC SPEAK FOR ITS SELF YOU TALKY BASTARD. If you ever find yourself saying “this year...” or “I’m about to make so many....” then slap yourself straight in the face and know you’re dumb

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