Bo Bolander @BBolander Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@Restzeezout

@karuppu_satta18

@carsonwinters_

@AWTambuwal

@braydeniel

@MdqSeabirds

@renorosgon

@marumar500

@almostcmb

@PocztaPolska

@sarnorisaru

@JoXkOysUT446637

@YumewakanauR

@PastorVladimir

@whenInternetOfB

@ToastTab

@Independence416

@faeruumi

@SecretFlying

@vanboyosky

@diorxxher

@HEYimHeroic

@Ylacanta179641

@Newseum

@elian_samer1

@andrewflint44

@510yaya

@realjurgmeister

@duolinguer

@Edgertronic

@JuttSarwer

@misatokashiwagi

@HerrinGabriela

@freakyjackz

@realjurgmeister

@jsimonh98

Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

i hope bill watterson is doing okay and is proud of all the children he radicalized with this stuff

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

saw someone who thought the 80s satanic panic "smurfs are evil" thing must be made up and i am here to tell you that shit absolutely happened

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

the old cat's hate for the kitten is more understandable if you imagine you're an 87-year old lady creeping steadily down the hall to the kitchen, hurrycane at the ready, when suddenly from stage left a brawny 25-year old dude runs in & cheerfully bam margeras you to the floor

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

me: jesus, all i have in the cupboard is two tins of tuna fish, an expired box of jello, and egg noodles 1950's cookbook author's ghost, calling from hell: well well well, not so high and mighty now, are we?

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

"get vaccinated!!!" feels like it's becoming the new JUST VOTE, in that, yep, great to do, very important, done by itself isn't going to fix everything now currently broken & getting worse but puts all the blame for how fucked things are on the general populace

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

3 years

i have the maddest of respect for daniel radcliffe, elijah wood, and robert pattinson, each of whom made fuck you money at an early age and have spent the intervening years doing whatever the fuck they feel like career-wise

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

imagine the hubris of thinking you can best dril at any of this

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

if you are in a position to get somebody pregnant and neither of you want that, now is a seriously good time to consider a vasectomy for fucking real

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

you can always remember the difference between art nouveau & art deco in the nerdiest way possible by thinking of it as "elves = art nouveau, dwarves = art deco"

ArtNouveauDeco

@NouveauDeco

2 years

Swedish silver plated and glass Art Nouveau wine pitcher from c. 1910.

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

10 months

so apparently there's a vaccine for utis now AND you can get the hpv vaccine even if you're up to 45 years old and these two things are not universal knowledge so, y'know, just putting that out there

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

walgreens vaccine webpage giving me fucking riddles when all i want is a booster

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

quarantined watching old reruns of roseanne and man it's great how much things have improved since this episode aired thirty fucking years ago

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

"self," i says to myself, "why is the cat so chill ten minutes before feeding time?" and why indeed

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

people are shocked at how indifferent the women sitting with him are and, well, yes, they are rich and insulated and would feed a thousand of your kids into a woodchipper without blinking an eye if it suited their needs, which is essentially what's going on

greg the menace

@mistergeezy

2 years

Senator Rafael Edward Cruz of Texas is discovering that his constituents are TIRED of his shit.

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

hey did you know if you're an obligate carnivore and you eat six tablespoons of butter it will be instantly recognizable as such when somebody has to clean up the aftermath later

Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

"self," i says to myself, "why is the cat so chill ten minutes before feeding time?" and why indeed

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

folks who regularly take their cats out on leads, how much screaming to go outside during the day does this usually lead to on a scale of 1-10

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 months

a brownstone near us with a pretty intact original interior sold for three million and now we're being treated to the sight of it being gutted down to the studs while all the woodwork is piled in a garbage skip outside. today it was this bannister & most of the tin ceilings

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

and on a different note it was also profoundly beautiful on occasion

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

elderly cat has never been a headbutter but she's been watching the kitten enthusiastically mind meld with us & just now came up and gave me one i can only describe as "elderly patrician new england matriarch makes a valiant attempt at hugging her child"

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

POLL: Does your cat 'talk' to you conversationally if you speak to it/ask it a question?

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

'just move' irritates me on so many fucking levels. why the fuck should those texans cede their homes to fascists? that's exactly what the people in state government making their lives miserable want, to drive them out

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

@d1sc0urse @mcmansionhell not all of them but it's extremely hard to wade through and find the actual craftspeople these days

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

i keep looking at our grocery bills every month and just blinking repeatedly, like if we're spending this much living off lentils and pasta and eggs how the fuck is anybody surviving at all

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

if elephants think we're adorable lil guys like we do cats or dogs did that dude just get his snoot booped

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

6 years

Uhhhhhhh I have SOME SUGGESTIONS

The New York Times

@nytimes

6 years

The man who bought a guillotine at auction in Paris last week isn't really sure what to do with it

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

smurfs? there's a wizard so it's evil. ninja turtles? that's eastern religion, buddy, they want to convert your kids into satanic buddhists. proctor and gamble? baking soda of the beast

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

3 years

You know how people in His Dark Materials become zombified passive gray versions of themselves if they have their daemons cut away? I think about that every time i look at San Francisco real estate for some reason

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

that thing in a long-term relationship where you talk in some kind of bizarre two-person code that is utterly indecipherable to anybody else, and how sad it is if a relationship ends and that language suddenly becomes a dead tongue

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

THE WITCHER (2019)

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

people who think your entire wardrobe turns into barrels on suspenders at the moment you lose your job are fuckin wild

Chomsky's Garden Human 🇵🇸

@hoomon26

4 years

@Jaaavis @chick_in_kiev Interesting that there were some pretty expensive vehicles in that line.

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

we are all calvin's dad now

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

I just need you all to know that there is a German Shepherd on this block who carries a stuffed animal with him wherever he goes. Every single day he has a different friend

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

to be fair the procter & gamble logo absolutely slaps

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

stuffy literalist translators: noooooooooooooo you can't translate hwaet that way, that's not literally what it means! noooooooo me: haha spear-danes go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrro

Gretchen McCulloch @gretchenmcc.bsky.social

@GretchenAMcC

4 years

brb translating "hwaet" as "bro"

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

reminder that the kellogg's workers are still on strike, their bosses are still trying to replace them, and that you still shouldn't be breaking that picket line

Michael Sainato

@msainat1

2 years

Some Kellogg's workers are asking the public to stop buying Kellogg's products as workers have been on strike for two months and the company is working to replace them rather than negotiate a fair contract. This is a beautiful post from a workers' wife on the strike

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

Sweet fucking grandmother of doilies, dollies, and thrice-cursed Hobby Lobbies, what the everchristing Dolores Umbridge did I just look at

311 Towhee Dr, Buda, TX 78610 - 4 beds/2 baths

(ACTRIS) 4 beds, 2 baths, 3091 sq. ft. house located at 311 Towhee Dr, Buda, TX 78610 sold on Aug 6, 2019 after being listed at $400,000. MLS# 7884178. Large 4 Br/2 Ba Ranch style home in Leisurewo...

www.redfin.com

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

"i'm gonna start this strip with an intricately drawn dead sparrow and have my characters posit on the fragility of existence and it's gonna run directly beneath snuffy smith and a little to the left of dagwood eating a giant sandwich"

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

3 years

jesus creeping christ please leave us something that doesn't feel like something a dystopian novelist would think up on the toilet and then toss out, just one single solitary activity

Bloomberg CityLab

@CityLab

3 years

Using cameras to monitor people looking at artwork, researchers hope that the data can help define "attraction value" for specific works of art, leading to changes in museum and gallery layout and exhibit scheduling

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

debating on whether or not it's ethical to murder people if they inconvenience you feels like a culmination of the past ten years, accruing layers of increasingly absurd societal cruelties as they roll towards some unfathomable nadir like a snowball covered in dog shit

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

towards the end he was basically just daring the syndicate to fire him before he quit and it rules

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

kids, edging towards the front door: kids, cautiously opening the front door: Feral hogs:

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

"saying writers should read is ableist because it's hard to read when you have adhd" my god, this is it, the take that finally makes me stride headfirst back into the sea

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

watching things like "child labor laws: too strict?" & "tenement buildings: do the poor really deserve windows?" get tossed around is giving me a profound sense of temporal displacement

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

they're 'friends'

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

3 years

i never ever ever ever ever in a million years thought that spending my twenties as an extremely online shutin living on message boards and irc channels would basically end up being like the equivalent of a polisci degree fifteen years later when the president got permabanned

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

and also that it will smell like you evacuated a drowned mariner from your ass

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

people keep telling me to get them some of those talking buttons and it would just be the old lady going WINDOW/KITTEN/THROW/WINDOW/KITTEN/THROW sixteen hours a day

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

AQUAMAN (2018)

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

oh my god how did he get it on his shoulder

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

3 years

what a fuckin king

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

the primary thing that's changed in that time is that i can't imagine this exchange actually making it to broadcast now

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

wait a damn minute

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

Also please remember this and please stop fucking acting like Biden has suddenly won this shit when he has emphatically hasn't

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

never thought "stay home and jerk off" would be how the world was saved but perhaps that was naive of me, all things considered

Big Think

@bigthink

4 years

Masturbation boosts your immune system and raises your white blood cell count, helping you fight off infection and illness:

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

like the one where calvin fucks with the chewing magazine survey data is no shit how i handle every single attempt at data mining from companies these days, facebook is quite certain i'm 112 years old and tries to sell me depends when i bother checking it at all

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

good lord not beloved local businesses like tiffany's and the hard rock cafe, run since 1996 by tony hard rock and his family

HARLAN Z. HILL 🇺🇸

@Harlan

4 years

Washington, DC is on edge tonight. It took decades to rebuild downtown DC to make it a safe place to earn a living. It took decades to rebuild downtown DC to make it a safe place for millions of Americans to bring their families on vacation. We could lose it so easily.

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

A good day to remember the Radium Girls, and the Triangle Shirtwaist girls, and everybody who has ever suffered and died to make rich men richer.

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 months

if i see that tub and light fixture out front i'm dragging them home, fuck it

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

thought glumly "bowie didn't need vyvsnse to function" and then immediately realized that was a stupid thing to think because bowie was also 98% cocaine at several notable points in his career

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

Rogers Wildlife Rehab south of DFW does a lot of amazing work, but this photo they just posted of four baby grackles utterly mesmerized by a cartoon may be their true gift to the universe

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

oh that dagwood, him love tasty big sandwich meanwhile

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

crime, crime, c-c-crime

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

"this is 'making the old cat scream like she's being skinned'"

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

Piloting my war rig through the wastelands hunting your kids for calories, if things keep going the way they look to

Stefan Molyneux, MA

@StefanMolyneux

5 years

Women get mostly infertile at 40, but live to be 80. Without a family, what are you going to do with those 40 long long years?

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

we just had to stop him from eating a thumbtack for the second time in a week so the comparison is apt in several ways

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

fuck her up santa

Eliot

@EliotETC

2 years

The mayor of North Pole, Alaska is a man who legally changed his name to Santa Claus, looks exactly like Santa Claus, and is also a big Bernie/M4A guy. He's now running for Congress against Sarah Palin.

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

come, weary traveller, and rest your head on the completely normal pillow

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

“Her breasts were pert and perky and, I realized with dawning horror, were also giving out the coordinates of all our agents in the field”

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

3 years

the pandemic has basically turned my brain into one of the rabbits from watership down where i can't really conceive of more than five people in one space at once and anything beyond that number is just hrair

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

a jerk for your troubles

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

i could go on at length about what an incredible fucking artist watterson was but it really speaks for itself, there's still nothing else that even comes close visually as far as daily strips go and the last one that was this fun to look at before c&h was probably pogo

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

3 years

there's an ice cream truck outside playing fur elise, for the sad kids who still want ice cream but know the experience will be an ephemeral moment lost as soon as it's experienced

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

This is the night of Pride where I leave out milk and cookies for Freddie Mercury, right? I always get confused about when the dates fall

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 months

@noahpasaran like sometimes an old interior is in bad shape and can't be saved, i get it, but jesus fucking christ there are salvage companies who will claim and resell this shit!

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

MR. ROGERS IS OURS NOW

Louisa 🌈👭

@LouisatheLast

5 years

So I went poking around to see if I could find a screencap of the book and

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

TSA dude scowled and sent me through the metal detector instead of the body scanner, then snapped I JUST SAVED YOU A LOT OF TROUBLE, THAT IS NOT THE THING TO WEAR TO THE AIRPORT because sequins

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

@AndreaGStewart it's kerrygold salted, i'd probably just eat it too if my heart wouldn't sputter to a stop like a cartoon prop plane

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

3 years

sausage seller that comes back to the neighborhood every year for the big saints festivals had a new sign up

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

our friends had beer, we had brownies, and thus the barter economy returned to nyc

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

10 months

god bless the japanese for having a fucking descriptor for this thing that actually happened to me late one unfortunate night

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

when the butter is hittin

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

poor robbie coltrane, doing fine character acting for years and now every obit's gonna start with fuckin hagrid

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

a riddle, o traveler: what walks on four legs in the morning and screams for food, four legs in the afternoon and screams for food, and finally four legs in the evening whilst still screaming for food

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

1 year

he's god's perfect posting machine, this will end with twitter shooting stream from its boltholes before exploding into flames like the overlook's boiler

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

it is extremely hard to explain to a doctor that "i need my vyvanse to function" doesn't just mean "for work" but additionally, "so i can read books, talk to friends, and cook meals requiring more than two steps to prepare"

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

Oh yeah, baby, we're gonna wait for the value to tank even further and buy that shit up and plant trees alllllllllll over those motherfuckers gonna make public parks out of those rich dude preserves

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

The fact that the band put out that statement in 1992 when most bands TODAY don’t have the stomach to risk their precious sales and say similar is a thing. I’ve never forgotten it.

Mysterious Circumstances Podcast

@PodcastMC

5 years

"If any of you, in any way, hate homosexuals, people of a different color or women, please do this one favor for us — leave us the fuck alone. Don’t come to our shows and don’t buy our records." --Kurt Cobain- RIP 4/5/94

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 months

all the tin ceiling tiles are now in a twisted, jagged heap out front

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

Me: What should I name this houseplant? My subconscious: well it’s a fern, something respectful of this living organism from an unspeakably ancient family Me: How about My subconscious: wait, no— Me: FERNIE SANDERS My subconscious: ok you know what go fuck yourself

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

the fact that there's this much fucking hand-wringing in certain circles over possibly getting a candidate who will bring us roughly up to european standards of living never fails to make my brain want to grow a mouth and throat so it can scream itself hoarse

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

the entire 'you won't die from this if you're young and healthy' thing also doesn't take into account that if every single hospital is slammed it may not matter, if, for instance, you still need a ventilator to get you over the hump

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 months

you cannot replace that wood, it's insane

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

fact: no uncanny horror you or i or stephen king or whoever get around to writing will be able to match up to the shit the ocean routinely does in real life

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

God bless the French. Aspirational shade.

Sécurité Civile

@SecCivileFrance

5 years

Hundreds of firemen of the Paris Fire Brigade are doing everything they can to bring the terrible #NotreDame fire under control. All means are being used, except for water-bombing aircrafts which, if used, could lead to the collapse of the entire structure of the cathedral.

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

saw someone in a thread about the Shining complaining that the movie "tricked the audience" into being scared with music and mood and gotta say, ART TRICKS YOU INTO FEELINGS THINGS THROUGH USE OF SENSORY DETAILS!!! is one humdinger of a hot take

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

the wealthy and powerful do not give a single solitary smirking shit about kids being torn apart by bullets, bombs, or anything else unless you make them do so at the tip of a sword

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

2 years

"give me the smartest kitten you've got," i said, "because it definitely won't be like keeping a velociraptor occupied six hours a goddamn day"

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

Half sunk a shattered visage lies, whose frown, And wrinkled lip, & sneer of cold command, Tell that its sculptor well those passions read Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things, The hand that mocked them, & the heart that fed; And on the pedestal, these words appear

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

5 years

Glam disruption best disruption

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Bo Bolander

@BBolander

4 years

i've talked about what a wonderful gift it was that kurt cobain talked up all of his favourite bands so kids in shitty little backwaters like me could go out and look for them, and watterson did much the same with pogo, krazy kat, little nemo etc in that 10th anniversary book

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