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@wdmorrisjr
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It's less about what family meals accomplish,
And more about what they represent.
Our lives are a blur of incessant activity.
Meals together are a physical pause to recover a truth so easily sacrificed at the altar of busyness ⏤
Nothing's more important than family.
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The Boredom Fight:
Make your kids live with boredom.
Kids need unscheduled time.
And, odd as it sounds, boredom is a skill.
I think much of the movement today toward mindfulness, stillness, and meditation,
Is a desire to develop the ability to be bored.
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It's hard as a parent to deal with the assault of boredom complaints.
But if you give in and fill up their time with external stimuli, you'll raise an activity addict.
Resist the urge to give them a distraction.
There will always be much to do.
Make them learn how to be.
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The "Me First" Fight:
Make your kids go last.
Not every time for everything.
But enough to remember that the world doesn't revolve around them.
If left on their own, most kids will elevate themselves above all others.
First in line.
The biggest piece.
Me. Me. Me.
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There's only one way to break this natural inclination.
You must periodically make your kids...
Go last in line.
Take the smallest piece.
Give up the remote.
Do someone else's chores.
Get their least favorite choice.
They won't like it, but they need it.
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The Awkward Conversation Fight:
Make your kids have uncomfortable conversations with you.
As kids get older, the things you need to talk about with them get more difficult.
For both of you.
Sex, dating, body image, values...
Can all be difficult subjects to broach.
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Your kids will roll their eyes and resist.
You will stumble and stutter.
But you must see through the awkwardness.
They want your perspective, lessons learned, and wisdom.
You want the pattern of open communication it establishes.
Wade into uncomfortable waters with them.
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The Limitation Fight:
Make your kids live within limits.
Learning to live within limits is a valuable life skill.
In fact, many adult problems arise from an inability to accept them.
Problems like:
- Debt
- Overcommitment
- Exhaustion
Come from ignoring our limitations.
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No one lives a life without limitations.
And you wouldn't want to.
They mature us.
If you don't introduce and enforce them,
You're hurting your kids.
Screen time limits, dietary limits, activity limits, and schedule limits are all good.
Teach your kids to embrace them.
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As a parent, you have to pick your battles.
These are some stands I've been glad we've taken.
They're not easy, but they're worth the fight.
As I often say to my kids ⏤
"I know you don't think this is important,
But one day you'll be so thankful you had parents who did."
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